Sorry it took so long. After next week, things should start to slow down school-work wise....
And on we go....
Sam had finally managed to phase back after he spent several hours with Jared, but he continued to avoid contact with the Elders. Jared - who was staying at his place until he learned better control - spoke with his family every day, so he kept Sam updated on Emily's recovery. But it was word of mouth, and it didn't feel like enough.
Sam wished he could see her for himself, assure himself that she was getting better and then beg for her forgiveness, but he didn't want to upset her. Seeing him would very likely upset her.
He and Jared had tested the mental... bond they seemed to share. Nothing was hidden from each other, and within a few days, they knew basically everything about the other. It stretched really far, as well. Though the sensations and emotions and absent thoughts became harder to hear and understand at a large distance, directed thoughts didn't.
Sam took Jared along the treaty line, showed him the usual patrol route, and then they split it between each other. The whole time, they could keep in contact with the other through the mental connection. It made the work less lonely and easier.
Admittedly, it was great to no longer be alone. And Jared was adjusting quickly. He'd have a shit-load of work to catch up on when he returned to school, which had started just a few days ago here on the rez, and he'd probably be exhausted all the time with patrolling and his normal life to juggle. But he seemed to find it almost enjoyable, Sam had realized.
Have to look at the silver linings, Boss, Jared thought.
Sam snorted and rolled his eyes as he neared the beach. Pup, he retaliated teasingly, making Jared's laughter ring through his head.
Yes, no longer being alone had made everything so much easier to handle. He'd thought simply deciding to accept everything had made it better than it was before, and it had. But it was nothing like no longer being in it alone.
It was early, just before dawn, so no one was up and about just yet. The sun was just starting to peek over the horizon and the ocean looked calm and peaceful. Sam was aware that Jared was already returning to the house, waiting for him to join him and help him with phasing back.
Sighing heavily, Sam stopped and sat on the pebbly beach just before the water, watching it sadly.
Emily had told him herself, right here at this beach, how she had thought she was going to miss the simplicity of everything here. He'd ruined that for her. Now every time she'd think of La Push, she'd remember how complicated everything truly was. How complicated he'd made everything for her.
What were you supposed to do? Not tell her? You couldn't have kept quiet forever feeling like that.
Sam growled, directing something like a mental glare at Jared's mind. I could have. I should have.
I don't-
Quiet, Jared, Sam snapped in frustration. He didn't want to hear Jared's view on it, because Jared kept trying to assure him that none of it had really been his fault. And Sam knew he deserved to feel guilty about what had happened.
Jared's anger and frustration reached Sam, but also his forced obedience. Sighing, Sam stood up and shook himself, turning to head towards his house. He was still getting used to the whole... alpha thing.
Sorry.
Jared's forgiveness touched him, along with sympathy. Yeah. Me too.
Sam reached his house less than fifteen minutes later, and met Jared in the woods at the back. Jared popped up to his feet and grinned at Sam.
I think I can do it on my own this time.
Every time before this, Sam had had to remind Jared to focus, concentrate on calming his heart rate and thoughts. It was harder than it sounded, especially for a werewolf. Sam had been using the mental link to help Jared with his control when trying to phase back and to help calm him. But if he thought he could do it by himself, Sam was happy to let him make the attempt. He couldn't always be there for the younger boy.
Jared closed his eyes, purposefully focusing on relaxing each of his muscles, then each thought in his mind. Within minutes, all he was thinking about was the phase back to human.
Moments later, Jared was human - a little pale, but grinned gigantically.
"Yes!" he cheered, laughing. Sam chuckled slightly, shaking his head. Now it was only a matter of a few weeks before Jared could go back to normal society and be alright.
Phasing back himself, Sam led the way into the house. Every day, one of the Elders' wives brought by bags of groceries and left them on the front porch. Every day, Jared and Sam at all the food they could get their hands on.
While Jared left to shower, Sam opened the front door and grabbed the groceries with both hands. He lugged the heavy multiple bags into the kitchen and threw them on the table. One of them had half a dozen pizzas in it, so Sam dragged those out and ripped two open, sticking them in the oven and turning it on.
For the other groceries, Sam unpacked them and carelessly tossed them into the fridge and freezer. He was putting in the third and fourth of the pizzas when Jared came out of the bathroom, looking exhausted.
He sniffed the air, his eyes landing hungrily on the cooling pizzas.
Sam's eyes narrowed. "There's two more in the oven, two on the counter. Put the other two in when these are done. Three each," he explained as he passed Jared on his way for his own shower. He paused in the doorway and glared at him. "Don't each any of my pizzas, Jared," he warned on a growl.
Jared grinned. "Is that an order Boss?"
"I can make it one," Sam mock-threatened.
Jared laughed, waving Sam off, already heading towards the cooling pizzas. "Whatever you say, Sam."
Rolling his eyes, Sam went to take his shower.
When he came out, three pizzas were sitting on the counter, the delicious scents of melted cheese, pepperoni, and tomato sauce tantalizing his nose. He threw them all on a platter, not bothering to slice them, and went into the living room where Jared lounged across the couch, eyes drooping sleepily and staring without focus at the TV screen that was showing some movie on FX.
Sam quickly ate his own food, feeling his hunger abate for the time. Jared's eyes peeled open as Sam stood, closing agian as he passed the couch.
"Don't drool," he teased.
Jared lifted a hand and made a lazily rude gesture. Laughing, Sam entered his room, where his bed was calling to him.
The moment he hit the mattress, he fell deeply into sleep.
~*~*~
Emily sighed as she stared out the window above Leah's bed. Both her cousins were in school, and her Aunt Sue - after making sure she didn't need anything - had left to go grocery shopping.
Harry entered the room and took a seat in the chair beside the bed, putting a plate of food on the bedside table. Emily glanced at it, uninterested, and looked out the window again.
"How're you doing, sweetie?" he asked gently.
He'd explained that Leah and Seth and even Sue didn't know about Sam, and Jared now too apparently. They all believed that she'd been mauled by a bear.
It changed everything, knowing what Sam was. It made the whole situation with Leah monumentally different. Harry had told her how hard Sam had tried to balance his lives; Emily had even seen herself how it had taken a toll on him. It made every conversation she'd ever had with him... changed. There was new meaning behind every word, every look. The bitterness and strange comments all made sense now.
At night, sometimes, she had nightmares about what had happened, not that she'd told anyone about them. They knew of course, because she woke up screaming.
But they didn't know the details.
"Fine," she sighed softly.
Truth was, she was going nuts.
Harry nodded, sighing himself. "Okay," he said. "If you need anything, just let me know."
They all said those exact same words as they left her room, all in the same sad helpless tone. She wasn't sure what she wanted, let alone needed. How was she supposed to let them know about something she didn't know herself?
As her uncle left her room, Emily went back to staring out the window.
~*~*~
Sam eased himself closer to the house. He couldn't help himself from checking on her every night. She never knew - no one but Jared knew and he only knew because of that mental bond thing they had going - so he couldn't find any reason to stop.
Except that he was borderline stalking the poor girl. But other than that, there was no reason for him to stop checking on her.
When he reached the window of Leah's room, he fell to the ground with a sigh. The window was cracked open, allowing some cool night air into the room, and teasing him with her scent.
Guilt crushed his chest as he caught the scent of the healing scars, a slightly sour, bloody, raw scent. He whined, lifting a paw and dropping it over his muzzle unhappily. The thought of what he'd done to her was driving him crazy still, waking him up from terrible, sweaty nightmares every night. He was tearing himself apart over it still, unable to find a reason to forgive himself.
Emily must hate him.
Knock it off, Boss. Maybe she's over... it?
Sam scoffed, rolling his eyes at Jared's thoughts.
He heard Jared's mental sigh. Okay, so she's probably not quite over it. But maybe you should talk to her about it. It was an-
Sam growled, and Jared stopped, sighing again, before focusing once again on his patrol.
He stayed curled up on the ground under her window, waiting.
Every night, she woke up screaming. Beforehand, she'd thrash around slightly, making distressed sounds, sometimes even managing to make a few coherent mumbles that always included his name. Even without that, it wouldn't take a genius to figure out what was terrorizing her dreams. But once she had the nightmare, she'd be able to fall asleep peacefully.
He always waited until she woke up, just to know she'd be able to sleep peacefully afterward.
About an hour, her scream pierced the night.
He had to forcefully remind himself to stay still and not jump to comfort her. He'd likely only terrify her more, but he couldn't help but have this happily-ever-after dream of coming to comfort her and actually succeeding, actually being able to pull her into his chest and soothe her back to sleep. In this perfect scenario, everything worked out, somehow.
He never quite knew how, though. That part always escaped him.
Sighing, he stood up and shook himself. Emily would be able to sleep now that her nightmare was over. He could patrol the rez now without worrying about her too much.
Still think you should talk to her.
Shut up, Jared.
The kid grinned mentally. That an order, Boss?
Rolling his eyes, Sam purposefully ignored the taunt.
~*~*~
About a month had passed. Emily could get up and move around, and as long as she didn't move in such a way that the scars were stretched too far, her pain was minimal.
Standing in front of the bathroom full-length mirror, Emily looked at her body. The scars were raised and a deep red and horribly stretched from her cheek down to her ribs, puckering the skin and distorting the proportions of her body slightly. The worst distortion was on her face. Her lip was pulled down into a horrible frown, a permanent grimace of pain.
She sighed heavily, touching the scars on her cheek lightly. Emily doubted she'd ever get used to the sight or feel of them.
But she could learn to accept them and move on in her life.
"I'm going shopping," Sue called through the closed bathroom door.
Quickly, Emily yanked on a robe and dashed out of the room an down the hall.
"Aunt Sue! Wait! Didn't you go shopping yesterday?" she asked, pushing hair out of her face and frowning in confusion.
Sue smiled slightly. "Yeah, I did. Harry's having me go shopping for Sam. Poor boy's been working himself into the ground, so we've been helping him out by going grocery shopping every week." With a slight wave, Sue turned and walked out the door, closing it gently behind herself.
Lost in thought, Emily wandered back down the hall and into Leah's room. As she dressed, she pondered what this could mean... for her.
Someone had to bring the food that was bought to Sam's house. He had to open the door for them, right? Maybe talk to whoever was there.... If she happened to be the one to bring the food, he'd have to talk to her, right?
A plan forming in her mind, Emily moved into the hall and grabbed the phone.
Two hours later, Emily found herself standing in front of a house. Inside was quiet, no noise coming from inside even though it was late morning. Her heart was pounding slightly, vague memories of the woods behind the house making sweat break out lightly across her brow.
Taking a deep breath, Emily squared her shoulders and marched up the steps of the porch before pushing the unlocked door open and letting herself inside.
Le gasp! :O
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