note: sorry for the long wait…I haven't had any ideas in a while, plus school and blah blah blah…well, enjoy !
Summary:
- Angelus works his magic, scaring the hell out of Buffy (or exciting the hell out of her?)
- he leaves her in confusion as Angel comes in; Angelus is still unknown to everyone
"Buffy? Are you awake?" He whispered to her so softly, with such love and compassion as he opened the door. Before Buffy even noticed, Angel caught a glimpse of something moving out the window. He turned on the lights in her room before rushing to her opened window.
"What the-"
"Angel, I can explain," she started, worry evident in her voice as she sensed Angel's anger growing. He could have sworn he saw some guy just leap from the second story window, but when he looked down there was no trace of anything. Angel looked back to Buffy, a confused look on his face.
She looked away from him, from his innocent gaze and wondered if it was finally time to set things right.
"There's a few things I need to share," she said, looking towards her bed where Angelus had sat. "And I think I should tell you a few things about me and my past."
Buffy waited in the kitchen for Angel to wake up Faith. Spike and Xander were going to be left out of the discussion not only because of their condition but because Buffy was still a little reluctant to trust the duo, despite what Angel had said about them.
She looked out the window and pulled her bathrobe over her because of the cold. Even with the hot cup of chocolate at 3:00 AM, she couldn't seem to get rid of the shivers that went down her spine every other minute when she thought of Angelus.
The name had brought fear and hate to a close tie. Before, it was easy; but that was before the loser grew up into a god, before the creepiness turned into a dark, mysterious delight…before Angelus knew what hormonal buttons to press, and quite literally, too. She let out a sigh and sipped some of her hot chocolate, trying to concentrate on the matters at hand.
And then there was Angel. She felt like she was ready to explode with all the confusion in her life. If only Angelus had never showed up, or if only Angel and herself had met at a different time, different place…different everything. Angel showed her compassion, a gentle something Buffy had not seen in a long time. But unlike Angel's actions, Angelus' were deliberate, meant to make her submit and hate herself for reacting.
Angel and Faith silently walked into the kitchen, both unsure how to act around Buffy. With their newest foster sister deep in thought, Faith carefully took a seat across from her at the table while Angel brought a chair close to Buffy.
He put his hand over hers. "Buffy," he said. She acknowledged him by slightly tightening her grip on his hand.
"I-I don't know…where to start," she said absently. Angel looked to Faith, both wearing a worried look on their faces. Buffy had never been this much of a shell before, even when she entered the family.
Faith sighed. "Alright. Let's try to figure this thing out, OK B?"
Buffy nodded and took another sip of her drink.
"How about we start from what just happened," Angel suggested as he caressed her hand.
She nodded again, trying to collect her confidence. "I was just visited b-by the man who creates my nightmares," she said plainly. She smiled bitterly at the memory. "Ironically, I just woke up from a nightmare…more like a flashback, really. I don't remember much, but when I woke up someone came into my room. I…I thought it was you, Angel," she said softly, glancing at him, "and I told you to stop playing around…but it was really Angelus."
"Angelus?" Faith said incredulously. "God, talk about coincidences."
Buffy grinned despite her mood. "I know. That's why…that's why I was kind of weary around you, Angel, if you couldn't guess."
"Buffy," he said, placing his fingers under her chin to lift her face up to his. "Look at me."
She looked up at him, at his soft face and unwavering compassionate eyes.
"I want you to know that I would never harm you on purpose," he said. The two momentarily forgot about Faith, forgot about everything as Angel continued making his vows. "I don't want you to be afraid of me just because of name-"
"It's not just that, Angel," Buffy said in a panicked tone. "Angelus and you have a very…similar look."
Faith glanced up. "Similar look?"
Buffy shifted under Faith's intense stare. "Yeah…you guys are like twins or something."
Angel stiffened at the remark, and Faith visibly narrowed her eyes. "You're sure about this, B?"
"How could I not be?"
"She's right," Angel said. To Buffy's despair, he let go of her hand before standing up and walking to the kitchen window.
Buffy continued talking after she wrapped her arms around herself, trying to recreate the comforts Angel had given to her moments before.
"Angelus is…not very nice," she started lamely. "H-he abused me, and his own mother. I think that he might have e-even killed her." As she told her story, her voice became stronger. "I don't think you want to know what he did, how he did…the things that he did. I wasn't always like this. I mean I used to be confident. Independent. Someone with an attitude."
Faith smiled. "I can imagine that."
"That was all before I met Angelus. He used to tell me…" she hesitated for a moment, looking back at Angel who stared at her intently. "He used to tell me that we belonged together. That my confidence matched his dominance." Buffy shifted under both stares. "I…I'm not sure what happened."
Angel remained vigil, staring more through Buffy than actually at her. Faith stood up from her seat and approached her new-found foster sister, stroking her gently on the back but looking worriedly at her older foster brother.
The lights in the kitchen seemed to dim as Buffy heard her own sobs, slow at first but crippling her speech completely. She closed her eyes and cried into her hands, Angel and Faith both trying to show her a warmth she needed so desperately to feel.
Angel showed a hesitant Buffy to his bed before tucking her in and promising to protect her. The whole ordeal sounded a little cheesy to Faith, but she figured it was more of Angel's "macho" attitude making it's way to the surface.
She turned to leave the room after realizing that Angel was going to sit by her until she fell asleep-which could have taken forever, Buffy being the insomniac that she was.
"Where are you going?" Angel asked, his eyes still on Buffy who looked at Faith.
"Time to check on my two boys, bro," she answered, closing the door behind her.
Buffy stirred and Angel looked back towards her. "Anything wrong?"
She smiled apologetically. "I really don't think I'll be going to sleep soon."
Angel grinned. As he stroke her brilliant and soft strands of hair, he replied, "we should do something to make you tired."
"I'm tired," she answered, not catching the meaning to his words. "Just not sleepy, if that makes sense."
"Anything I can do?"
She looked up at him. "Hold me?"
He licked his lips. "Always." With a swift motion he was underneath the covers with her, the two lovers wrapped in a friendly and beautiful embrace, where the only thing that mattered was themselves.
Thanks to:
- melodieeidolem
- fanficer lore
- maeve of the nile (you might be on to something… : ) )
- claddagh ring (exactly what I was trying to get away from : ) )
- jaysgrl (late but…thanks ! Merry Christmas to you as well : ) )
- cutleryismyfriend
- buff
- Stacey (I love angelus/buffy…but angel is just too sweet…gah, I'll let the readers decide : ) )
-d-daygirl
- slayerchick33
- james lee (not much of a cliff in this one ; ) )