A/N: Hey all. Sorry this has taken me so long to update. Sadly the real world has been kicking my butt. Thanks so much to RubySun03 for helping me knock out the kinks! Hopefully I'll get back to this with a bit more consistency.

Oh, there's some music that is really important for this chapter. The links are in my profile, but I'd really appreciate it if you listened to those songs either before reading or while reading. It's Tracy Chapman, you'll enjoy it. So, no peeking until you listen to those songs. Go do it now!

Eric threw a bag of clothes on the back seat before sliding back the passenger seat and climbing into my Malibu. He watched me silently as I reached over him and into the glove compartment. I pulled out my cd book and flipped through it quickly, settling on one Amelia had burned for me. I leaned back into my seat, relaxing as the music started playing. I was glad he wasn't arguing with the unspoken 'driver picks the music' rule. We sat in silence for a few minutes, me staring at the road, Eric alternating between staring at me and just looking out the window.

A song I particularly liked came on and I started singing quietly to myself. I didn't really care that Eric was in the car, but I did hope that the stereo mostly drowned me out. "I am yours, if you are mine. When I fall and stumble, flat on my face. When I'm shamed and humbled, in disgrace. I am yours, if you are mine…" I glanced sideways at Eric. He was staring at me intently, and I stopped singing quickly. "Sorry, my voice is pretty terrible."

He shook his head, as if in disbelief. "Listen to the words, Sookie."

I listened as Tracy Chapman sang to us. "When time decides, it won't stop for me. When hawks and vultures, are circling. I am yours, if you are mine. I am yours, if you are mine."

We sat in silence as the song ended, switching to one that I thought was much more appropriate, Broken. Eric suddenly started speaking. "You are mine." His eyes flitted over to me, belying the certainty in his voice. "I could be yours, if you wished me to be. I," he hesitated, "I think we could be happy, just being each other's."

I thought for a minute, considering my words carefully. "I'm not seeing anyone else, Eric. If you don't want to see anyone else, that's your choice. I," I felt like my tongue didn't want to move in my mouth. "I know that you need to feed. It just isn't something I want to hear about, alright? And one way or another, I tend to hear about things, especially the goings on of fang-bangers."

We were both silent for a time, listening to Fast Car. Eric's hand tapped on his thigh along with the melody. Figures he'd like that song. Finally he spoke. "I don't know how things were with Bill on this issue. I find I do not want to know, since it will probably make me dislike him further, and he really is on the edge of my patience, which is not a good place to be in his condition. I really don't need that much blood. I don't, in fact, need human blood every day. Contrary to what you might think, we can subsist on True Blood, as boring as that might be." I caught a bit of his grin from the corner of my eye.

My knuckles were white from clutching the steering wheel. "Look, Eric, if you're going to do that, please make sure you're doing it for yourself and not for me. We don't see each other all the time. Don't feel like you need to sacrifice for my sake, alright?"

He reached and stroked one of my hands, which were still firmly attached at ten and two. "I can also get donor blood. From a bag, not from a person. I don't know if you noticed, but I had some in the fridge." Oh, I'd noticed. "I'm completely happy with bagged blood, at least when it is supplementing yours."

I shook my head slightly. "Okay. Can we just leave it there? See where we go from here?" I glanced over at Eric, and he nodded. He looked troubled for a moment, but it passed. I felt like I needed to say something. "Bill did feed from other people while we were dating. If he drank from me more than a couple days in a row I'd start getting anemic. He just didn't do it around Bon Temps."

Eric made a fist and released it. "He is young. He requires a great deal of blood each day. You really hadn't dated anyone before him?"

I snorted. "I don't think you'll ever get the telepathy thing. I can always hear people. I wish I could show you what it's like to be me. Shielding helps, but I can't ever completely shut people out. Touching someone makes it so much worse. If I'm touching someone, I hear everything. I hated being on a first date, knowing the guy was just undressing me in his head. Plus everyone in my town thinks I'm pretty much nuts, so I never had much of a dating pool to begin with." I shook my head slightly, keeping my focus on traffic. "I got asked out by a few guys who weren't local when I started working at Merlotte's. I went on a date with Sam, when Bill and I weren't together for a bit." I laughed. "It didn't go so well."

Eric was looking at me in an odd way. "You dated the shifter?" He actually sounded incredulous.

"We went on a date, and we've had our moments. The whole me and vampires thing is a real hot button for Sam. Okay, we're officially done talking about anyone I've dated."

We listened to a song called The Promise. Eric looked lost in thought. "This song could be about me," he said, finally. I listened for a minute. If you dream of me like I dream of you, in a place that's warm and dark, in a place where I can feel the beating of your heart. Remembering, your touch, your kiss, your warm embrace. I'll find my way back to you, if you'll be waiting.

I grinned. "Did you dream about me then?"

He nodded, strangely serious. "It was maddening. I felt for so long that I was just on the cusp of remembering. I would get these flashes during my sleep, moments I just couldn't understand. Hands washing my feet in a basin, reaching out to take a hand in the darkness, running through a cemetery with someone on my back. I couldn't piece anything together. We still haven't talked about it."

"Do you want to talk about it?" I saw his nod out the corner of my eye. Great. What exactly was there to talk about? We'd both lived it, and now we both remembered. Did we really need to hash it out in detail? "So, talk. I won't stop you."

He seemed lost in thought for a few moments. "Your description of what happened while I stayed with you wasn't exactly complete. That is still… irritating to me. I don't understand why you couldn't tell me what happened."

I was starting to get a bit irritated myself. "What should I have said? How exactly would you have had me explain everything to you?"

"You gave me five sentences. The things I felt, the things we felt, what we were to each other, could not be condensed into five sentences. I still feel insulted by that. I deserved more than that. You just pushed me away, like I didn't mean anything to you, like we didn't even have the friendship we had before I stayed with you. You could have tried to tell me, to make me understand."

I snorted. "Right, Eric, because it's so easy to make you do anything. The 'you' that stayed with me was gone. Whatever feelings were there became irrelevant as soon as those memories disappeared. You reacted so negatively once I gave you those five sentences; I didn't want to see what you'd do if I tried to explain further. I mean, you sat there talking to yourself and wondering if you should seduce me or kill me. It wasn't really a great way to encourage honest communication." I wasn't trying to be snippy, even if I knew it was coming out that way. I really hadn't enjoyed him threatening me.

Eric was silent for several seconds. "That was not my finest moment. It was a frustrating time for me. You also need to think about the way I experienced things. I was in my office, then I woke up in your house and you wouldn't tell me anything about what had happened. You were so cold, so distant. I didn't know how I'd wound up there, and you wouldn't tell me anything, you just told me to wait for Pam. I could tell you were upset, that I'd had more of your blood, and I was pretty sure you'd had some more of mine. I could feel how upset you were. You wouldn't say anything to me."

I shook my head, trying to focus on my driving and ignore the fact that we were having a very emotionally charged conversation and it was after midnight. My mind was tired. Maybe I should have just let Eric drive. "I was having a pretty hard time of it myself, Eric." I would not cry. Not over this. I was so far past done crying over this. "My brother was still missing, I'd killed a woman- killed a woman- the night before. I just, I needed you, the you that had been with me for days, the you that cared enough to want to stay with me, the you that liked me just as I was and didn't constantly push, push, push. I needed that person desperately and he was just gone. Poof! Eric fucking Northman was back, full of innuendo and trying to seduce me. Shit!" I had to pull over. I really didn't want to do this, but tears were streaming down my face and I couldn't drive. I could barely see. As soon as I got the car over onto the shoulder, I was out as fast as humanly possible. Of course, Eric was faster since he had the whole not being human thing on his side. I pushed against him, trying to break out of his arms, but he held onto me.

"Sookie, I know you like to run. It's not going to work with me. Just talk to me." His voice was firm, and all I wanted to do was kick him and run for the woods. Why was he so much faster than me?

I was crying hard enough that I had to get in a gasping, choking breath before I could speak. "What do you want me to say, Eric? I had a lot on my plate, and I was supposed to sit there and talk you through several days of living together, living with a version of you that had been stripped of all the bullshit, a version that had told me he wanted to stay with me, a version that didn't want me to be so alone anymore. You would have laughed in my face and still tried to talk your way into my pants. Tell me I'm wrong."

He pulled me down until we were both sitting on the asphalt, illuminated by my car's headlights. His thumb traced over my cheeks, wiping away my tears, before darting into his mouth. Fucking vampires. I took another shuddering breath, trying to get my tears under control. "I am sorry I lost those memories when you needed me. I do understand now that it was difficult for you, but at the time I didn't know any of this. It had only been a few weeks since everything in Jackson. I finally felt like we were starting to see each other, then suddenly, I wake up in your house and your walls are back up, a thousand feet high. The only thing I could think to do was make a joke."

I sighed, finally feeling like I could breathe normally. I even managed to crack a small smile. Eric grinned back at me. "You know, you seem to have some pleasant memories of Jackson. I had a pretty bad time of it there, if you recall." He brushed a strand of hair that had come out of my braid away from my face. "My boyfriend ran off with his maker, who wound up just wanting to torture him. Because I'm too loyal for my own good, I went after him, rather than just giving you the program he'd left with me. I busted my ass trying to find him, wound up getting staked, managed to get him free, staked his maker, and when I finally thought we were safe, freaking Debbie Pelt pushed me into the trunk. Which, by the way, had had the emergency release lever disabled by whatever drug dealer you borrowed it from. So I was stuck in a very small space when a very starved Bill woke up. First he nearly drained me, then he raped me. Of course, that wasn't quite enough. He sat there sipping a True Blood as I ran out of oxygen. I remember what you said before I passed out by the way. 'What are you two doing in here?' You must be a real hit at parties."

Eric was frowning. He didn't even laugh at my witty comment. "He raped you?"

I shrugged. "Yeah, you didn't notice? I thought you could smell things like that."

"Your blood was every where. It was hard to focus on anything else, and then I was rather preoccupied with keeping you from dying. I still can't believe that you woke up, laughed at us and then informed us that Bubba was going to be crucified." He looked like he wanted to say something but didn't know how to proceed.

"Seriously, Eric, if you say something like, 'Are you alright?' I will smack you. It happened over a year ago, and he hadn't eaten in days. He didn't know what he was doing, and I know that. I'm not particularly happy about it, and it was the last time we had sex. So, just drop it."

He looked like he was going to say something, but then he just nodded. After a moment, he gave me a look. "One second. You had Bill's program the whole time?" I smiled in a way that was only slightly self satisfied. "Why didn't you just give it to us, if you knew he was planning on leaving you?"

I sighed. "Seriously, Eric, you need to get to know me a bit better."

Eric just shook his head. "I don't think I could ever make predictions about you, Sookie. You're right, though. You are too loyal for your own good. Aren't you cold? Let's get back in the car." I nodded, and didn't even put up a fuss when he immediately walked around to the driver's side. I leaned my head against the window as he pulled back onto the interstate. He was driving considerably faster than I had been. I looked over to frown at him. "Calm down. Do you always drive that slowly, or were you doing it deliberately to annoy me? At least this car is in better shape than your previous one. The alignment, however, is slightly off."

I actually snorted. Eric raised an eyebrow at me. "The alignment was fine until I had to run over a vampire to save your ass. Literally." Eric did laugh at that slight witticism. Siegbert had been in the process of dropping trou when I'd run my car over him. Then backed it over him.

Eric was still chuckling. "I never did ask, lover. What were you going to do with that bat?"

"I was out of options, Eric. Somehow, and I know it's just poor planning on my part, but somehow, I've never actually felt the need to keep a mess of stakes in my car. I do keep a bat." I smiled slightly. "You really hated my previous car. You must have been so pleased it got set on fire. Even cursed you thought it was a piece of crap."

"I'd lost my memory, not my eye sight. I can't believe I managed to drive the thing, even as far as Bill's. This is bearable. Just." I rolled my eyes at him, even if I could see his grin. The Malibu was the newest car I'd ever owned, and was in much better shape than my Nova had been. "I still want to talk."

Shit. "You go right ahead, Eric. I'm all ears." I wished I wasn't.

"When I came back to speak to you, the next evening, you were actually rude. You'd never been rude to me, not even when you were rescinding my invitation to your home. You were cold and you were rude, so I knew something had happened between us. You even seemed annoyed that I hadn't sent you flowers."

I huffed. "You were pretty quick to throw that check in my face. Why did you give me fifty grand, anyway? Pam and Jason worked out thirty-five."

He seemed almost angry. "Because you would have done it for free."

I was silent for a moment. Of course he was right, even if I could pretend otherwise. "You didn't know that."

"As much as you might like to deny it, I know you. I also knew you needed money, but were too proud to ever ask for it."

I balled my hands into fists. "I get by alright. I do like having some money in savings and having health insurance. I don't know what I would have done about the fire damage otherwise."

Eric was a mess of emotions. "Did it at least last some time?"

I laughed. He really had no concept of how large a sum of money that was to me. "Eric, in a typical year, I make about $23,000. Jason and I have a bit from our parents, but we hold it aside for emergencies." He looked slightly stunned. I continued on. "So, even after paying taxes on that money, and paying for what the insurance didn't cover for my remodel and a few other unexpected expenses, I've still got about ten grand of what you paid me left, plus the money from Rhodes now. It's the only reason I'm able to take some time off. If Hunter wasn't with me, I'd probably be back at work already. I'm fine for the moment, but I really don't like eating into my savings. There is a reason I never fixed my driveway, or bought a new car. There's a reason I get completely bent out of shape if I have to miss work. I need every shift."

He was silent as he took the exit towards Bon Temps. "Why do you do so much for other people, then, for no recompense? The Shreveport pack is always dragging you into their insanity, and I know you've never seen a dime from them."

I shrugged. "I was raised to help when someone asks. Alcide happens to be pretty good at asking."

Eric shook his head. "I heard about you coming home bloody and disheveled from their dispute in October, you know. Do we need to pick up any True Blood?" We would pass the Grabbit Kwik in a minute or two. I shook my head no. "Well, I was very upset to hear about that from Pam. I'd told you I would protect you, yet you didn't even think to ask me to."

"Eric, I didn't think I was going to a war. I was supposed to just tell if Alcide and Patrick Furnan were lying to each other. Plus, Sam had already insisted on coming with me. Claudine even showed up to keep me safe." I sighed when I thought of Claudine, but pushed through it. "Anyway, I was pretty well protected." I could see Eric's jaw tighten, but he didn't say anything.

Much quicker than we would have been had I been driving, we were heading through Bon Temps and out towards Hummingbird Lane. Finally he spoke. "I just wish that you would ask me for help when you need it." We were both silent as Eric pulled down my nice, smooth drive, pulling the car round back. I unlocked the back door and Eric followed me in.

"So," I made my voice lighter than I felt. "Can I get you anything?"

"You can make yourself something to eat." I sighed, but the set of his face told me he wasn't going to be backing down anytime soon. He followed me into the kitchen and watched as I stared at the contents of the fridge, willing something to strike my interest. The Weres had left one small slice of the apple pie on a plate, and since I really couldn't be bothered with anything requiring effort, I just grabbed that and a fork and sat down. I ate mechanically, with Eric watching every bite.

Half way through the slice, it started to seriously irritate me. "Eric, don't sit there and watch me eat. It is unnerving and I don't like it."

He rolled his eyes at me, but looked around the kitchen. His eyes settled on a framed photo of me and my Gran, taken when I was in high school. "You spoke of your grandmother frequently while I was cursed. You must have cared for her deeply."

My Gran's death was one of those things that had torn a hole in my heart that had never completely healed. It still felt ragged and painful around the edges. She'd loved every bit of me and had challenged anyone who had ever dared say anything about me where she could hear it. I smiled, sadly. "Yeah. I still miss her a lot. Some days I feel like I'd give anything for her not to have been killed, for me to have been here instead. I hate that she died because of me."

Eric knew all about my Gran's death, from the talks we'd had while he'd been under Hallow's spell. "I am sure that she gladly gave her life for you."

I laughed. "I don't think anyone gives up their life gladly, Eric. Without regret, perhaps, but not gladly. I would have loved for her to meet you. That would have been a sight to behold."

Eric arched an eyebrow. "She did not like vampires? I thought you said she approved of Compton."

I pulled the end of my braid over my shoulder, studying the way the strands of hair were woven together. "She was pretty desperate for me to have a boyfriend. I wonder what she would have thought of you. She's the only person I know who's more stubborn than me, with the possible exception of you."

Eric smiled. "I don't think there is anyone more stubborn than you are, lover."

"My Gran was an amazing woman. She was proud, and confident, and wasn't afraid to put anyone in their place. She was a good person, giving and hospitable. I sometimes wonder what she would think of the turns my life has taken. I still wish I'd gotten to ask her about Fintan. I wonder what her reasoning was, and why she never told us." Eric let me sit in silence while I finished my pie. Finally I pulled myself out of my own thoughts. I noticed that the light on the answering machine was flashing, so I stood up, stretched and hit play. I winced when the first message started going.

"Sookie, it's me, Quinn. Listen babe, I really want to talk to you. If you're screening your calls, please pick up. I want to see if you're alright. I figure the least you owe me is the courtesy of a conversation. Babe? Please call me back. I would come see you, but the damn blood-suckers are keeping me out of the area for the moment. Just, call me. I need to hear from you that you're okay." I jotted down the number he left before deleting the message, trying not to see Eric glaring at me.

The other message was Andy asking me to get in touch when I could. I could barely hear it. Eric was pissed. Once that message had played, I turned to Eric. "So, do you want to watch a movie?"

He moved so quickly I couldn't see what happened, but the next thing I knew I was backed into a corner. Eric wasn't touching me, and I could practically feel him holding himself back. "Why exactly are you going to call the tiger back?"

I sighed. Vampire jealousy was something I could seriously deal without. That had been one of the most enjoyable things about seeing Quinn. If he'd ever felt jealous of whatever Eric and I had had, he never showed it. I loved the amount of trust he had in me. "I'm going to call him back because he asked me to. It's common courtesy."

"I do not wish for you to speak to him." Eric's accent was getting more pronounced. That was never good.

"Last I checked, I wasn't wearing a leash. You don't own me." I knew pushing him wasn't a good idea, but I was tired and I was sick of being treated like property. I tried to push his anger out of my mind, since I had enough of my own. I took a deep breath. "Let's calm down, okay? What's your big issue with Quinn, anyway?"

Eric spun away from me and flung himself into a chair. I sat down across from him, giving him space and a bit of time to get himself under control. Finally he started talking. "I do not like that you have been with him." That actually made me laugh. I bit my tongue. "You started seeing him after we had been together. It offends me."

It took all my self control not to roll my eyes at him. He really did take high handed to all new levels. "Eric, you need to calm down about him. I dated him for a few months. Notice how I don't obsess over everyone who you've, and I'm going to use a euphemism here, 'dated'." I even threw in air quotes for emphasis. "You need to calm down. Why does he bother you so much?"

He stared at me for a few moments before he responded. "You threw him in my face. We had never settled things. You knew I would be angry and you started seeing him anyway."

I rolled my eyes. I had known Eric was going to be pissed to hear about my dating someone. I'd even told Pam I had a date, and I knew that would get back to Eric. Even if I had been vindictive, I didn't care. He hadn't even tried to see me since his loaner bartender nearly killed me because of him. "So what, Eric?" The look on his face was priceless. "Of course I knew you were going to be angry. You didn't have any right to be angry, so I didn't see any reason not to go out with a guy who took the trouble of asking me out. You being angry didn't much factor into it."

Eric was visibly struggling to hang onto his composure. "You didn't give me enough time. I was still trying to understand what you had told me about my time staying with you, trying to comprehend why I felt the way I did about you. You just brushed me aside like I was nothing."

I blinked as he lapsed into silence. "You'd had about three and a half months. Most of which you spent not talking to me."

He flinched slightly, but I saw it. "I have been on this earth for over a thousand years. I couldn't remember anything, and I can remember every moment since I've been turned, if I think back on it. You did not give me enough time to adjust."

I snorted. "Look, I hate to be blunt, but I don't have the same kind of time that you do. I'm turning twenty-eight in July. Forgive me if we've got different perspectives on time. Quinn asked me out. He's hard to read for a shifter, so I figured we had a shot. I don't get asked out all that often, or the chance for my telepathy not to ruin everything, so yeah, I said yes. If you're pissed off, be mad at me. Keep Quinn out of it."

Eric's eyes flashed as he looked at me. "Fine. I am angry with you for Quinn. I do not like anything that reminds me of the time that you were with him."

I walked around the table and wrapped my arms around his neck. My forehead rested against his. "I'm still going to call him. I wasn't kind when I broke things off with him. Will you feel any better if you know we only slept together once?" Well, it had been twice, but only one day's worth of sex only counted as once. "It was before Rhodes."

Eric was silent for a few minutes. Finally I felt him nod slightly and he wrapped his arms around my waist. "It makes me feel slightly better. I was convinced you went to bed with him after the soda can incident. It irked me."

I laughed, shaking my head slightly. "Well, consider yourself un-irked. I never did say thank you for staying with me, even if it was a stupid thing to do. So, thanks."

His cool lips brushed my cheek before he pulled away to look into my eyes. "It was no more stupid than you coming back into an exploding building to revive Pam and me. Or even picking up a confused, lost vampire on a dark road in the middle of the night. You know, it isn't just about me and you. I dislike the way Quinn treated you." I frowned and he elaborated. "The way he spoke to you, it was disrespectful."

I rolled my eyes. "You know, you're not always completely respectful when you speak to me."

"I am for the most part, certainly when we aren't alone. At least I'm not calling you 'babe' until I am blue in the face."

"Can you be blue in the face? You don't breathe. Anyway, isn't 'lover' the equivalent?"

"It isn't. 'Babe' is so cheap, so… California, 1973. I used it myself on so many women whose names I couldn't be bothered to remember. Women who were barely worth glamouring. To hear you spoken to in such a way disgusts me."

"Seriously, Eric, just because you have bad associations with the word 'babe' doesn't make it into a curse, four letters or not."

He shook his head in frustration. "You do not understand. It isn't the word itself, it is the tone in which it is said. As if the words are not worth lingering over, enjoying. Even now, when he is begging you to speak to him, he just throws it at you, like trash he expects you to deal with. He betrayed you, and he expects anything from you? He is no kind of man."

I just shook my head. "Look, Eric, I get it; mostly, anyway. I've got my own issues with Quinn, and I'm going to discuss them with him. I don't see us being best buds, but I don't hate him. I'm going to call him. I'm not going back to him, so chill out."

"Will you at least tell me what he wants?"

My fingers ran through his hair and drew his chin up so I could look into his eyes. "If it's important, I will. If it's just me and Quinn hashing things out, you're not getting any details, okay?" He nodded. "So, what about that movie?"

We got about halfway through Amelia's copy of Hedwig and the Angry Inch (what can I say? Listening to the music with Hunter made me want to watch the film), before Eric convinced me of a better way to spend our child-free evening. Several ways.

A couple of hours later, with dawn still pretty far away, we lay in my bed. I was struggling to keep my eyes open, stroking Eric's chest, enjoying the look of him in the soft light of a few candles scattered around my room. I sighed and closed my eyes, relaxing into the comfort of the bond and the cool chest of my vampire. "Sookie," Eric's voice was soft, soothing. "Can you hear me?"

I nodded slowly. "Mmmhmmm. I'm not quite asleep yet."

"That's interesting." The tone of his voice was different, but subtly so. "Because I didn't say anything."