A Lover's Dozen

Seventh Rose.
Hat Trick.

I hadn't thought much. Frankly, I never thought a lot anyway. And when I grabbed the two roses in my hands, the only thought I had was to run. So I did. I used to always act on impulse, and whether it was then or now, I did what came to mind first. The cards where shoved in my other hand as I made my frantic escape. Kakashi wasn't keen on keeping them either.

I bolted from the office; I vaguely saw the outline of Tsunade coming back from whatever she had been doing. The one thing that I had thought of, after running, was I needed to get out of here. I couldn't stay here, not when I had discovered two roses in a dead man's locker.

So I dashed to the only place I could think of. I felt sick as I ran and it made my destination even more perfect. I rounded a few corners and bashed my way out the side doors. The wood left a smarting sting against my head and arm but that was a price I was willing to pay to get to the toilets next to the tennis courts.

The roses and cards burnt and cut into my skin as I ran, I held them so tight. I had wanted to let them go so badly, but I couldn't, I was panic stricken and I knew if I let them go, I would turn back around to pick them up.

I burst into the bathroom and leaned my head over the metal sink. I half expected something to come out, but it didn't. There was a lump in my throat and I desperately wanted it to come out. I stuck my fingers down my throat, the roses dropped to the ground. It came up as soon as I let them go down far enough.

I dropped down to my knees and let my head dangle over the edge. My breath came in raspy pants and I threw up again. I shivered. I turned on the tap and watched as the water mixed with the vomit and made it watery and slushy. I fought the urge to throw up again. I couldn't fight it and it spilt from my mouth. I was never a strong person.

I heard the door rattle and I snatched the roses off the ground and ran to the last cubicle. I couldn't help shivering, my whole body racked with tiny convulsions. My hands felt deadly cold and my face burned. My heart quickened in my chest and I was afraid it might jump and turn to the side from all the pumping.

The door opened slightly and a pair of expensive shoes stepped into the dirty tiled floors. You could tell they where expensive, they made that expensive clippity clop. He made an annoyed noise and let the tap run a little longer before turning it off. He was obviously disgusted by the sink that he left immediately afterwards. I sighed in relief.

I sat on the lidded seat and leant against the wall. I felt hot and yet I still shivered. For the first time I opened and read the notes. I was afraid, I didn't want to know.

"Love from one side hurts, but love from two sides heals."
-William Shakespeare

I flipped it shut and read the next one.

Just wait and see
You gotta hear what I say
I'm in love with you
I'm not so far away

-Someday Someday, Thirsty Merc

My head was spinning by now and I felt hot and cold at the same time. My hands felt sweaty and clammy. I rubbed my palms across my pants and cracked my knuckles. The action sent a little calm through me, hearing the cricks and feeling the lasting tension throb away.

I pulled at my hair, anything, I needed to calm down. My body felt like it forgot how to live and it was doing whatever it pleased. Out of sync, out of tune, out of order.

My body shook as another shiver ran across me. The door swung absently on its own making a shrill squeak, the lights streaming in from the window making everything bright, I closed my eyes. It was too bright.

My knees started wobbling and my hands went into frantic shaking mode, like I had arthritis or something. I clutched my head to stop them from shaking and to stop the head ache I was getting.

I have never felt so terrified in my whole entire life. The way this person keeps delivering these roses, and theses messages! I'm over reacting, I know, I've told myself many times before but I can't help it. They were so daunting, everywhere you turned, you'd see a rose. The weekend had been the best. I hadn't moved an inch from my bed, the thought of home comforted me, but there was at least half a day left.

Night after night as I sat and ate dinner, staring at the roses, I had wished that the first one was meant for Sasuke. I know, I sound mean and selfish and whatever, but I know he would deal with it a hell of a lot better than I am right now. I felt like crying, but the stern voice of my father told me to shut up. So I did.

And, and, and the fact that they found these in Phiktor's locker made it worse. Was I the reason that he killed himself? Maybe the fact that I started disappearing and everything once I got one? Maybe it was me. Maybe I killed him. The way I reacted killed him, killed him and his heart in one swift blow.

I'm a murderer. I killed Phiktor Marshall. The thought sent out a new army of shivers to charge up and down everywhere. I was shivering so hard I was afraid of falling off the seat.

I needed something to do. I didn't want to go back to class, not like this, it would raise too much suspicion. I fret around the cubicle wondering what to do. I had to something. Something that allowed me to stay in here. I need something to do!!

I rattled around my pockets. I felt the cards and avoided it. I patted down everywhere; I had to have something in my pockets. Every time I fumbled for something, I would end up clutching the pocket full of cards. I would stumble back and forth from pocket to pocket and cards. I had flicked them out, read them like I've never seen them before and shove them back in with a new bout of fear.

I pulled my knees in toward my chest, clutching myself so tight my muscles ached but it was a nice distraction. I swallowed hard, but I had nothing to swallow down, only the remnants of my stomach from earlier. I felt disgusting, like I was dirty, I am dirty. My hands are dirty, everywhere I'm dirty. I flexed my fingers. I feel so dirty, a dirty murderer.

I feel something slip away from and fall to the ground in a thundering smash. It startled me more than it should, I knew, I always knew. The echo rang louder than it should and when it came to a silence, every thing was still. I glanced down and saw the flash of metallic green. I scooped it up and shook the tin. My heart beat erratically against my chest as I fumbled to flip the lid up. I finally got past it to tip a drop onto my hand. I threw it in my mouth without a second thought. I sucked on the tablet, clicking open and clicking shut the case. The blast of mint ran through the walls of my mouth and down my throat. It escalated to my nose and I could feel the cold breeze as I breathed in and out. The feeling was surprisingly calming, like a baby and its thumb.

I ate one after on after one until there where none left. I had to get more once I got out of here. My heart didn't stop its relentless beating and it made me even hotter. I lost count of how long I had been in here. I didn't want to know anymore. I felt numb inside.

I couldn't take sitting here anymore. I needed to get out. I needed fresh air. I need something else than the four walls of a toilet block. I picked up my bag and swung it onto my back. I contemplated taking the roses with me, and I did.

As I came out of the tiny cubicle, I looked in the mirror, my image was dishevelled in the dirty mirror but I could see I looked dead. Dead like.. I didn't even want to go there. But what made me scream was the reflection I saw in there with me. Phiktor stared at me, his blue eyes as blue, maybe bluer than mine. I ran.

And I kept running. The rest of the school was still in class and I tried not to yell so loud. I fled through the grounds, students wondering around whizzed pasted and looked at me funny. I didn't care, not when you have something tailing you.

I ran out the school gates, I felt like I was running for no reason, but every time I turned around; there he was giving me the same strange staring expression. So I kept running. Like a sane person would. And every time a I glanced up from the ground he would be there staring at me, the ever present expression, never changing never ending, like he couldn't change it, the wind had gotten to him.

I couldn't help myself and screamed when he phased out of no where in front of me. I had just turned a corner when I swear I had bumped into him. I changed my path and kept running. My hands started to sweat again and I rubbed them profusely on my pants. I had risked stumbling, I had stumbled, and I would have fallen to the pavement if it weren't for my fevering attempt at escape.

I had to get away.

Seriously.

I felt like I was trapped in some vicious cycle of a nightmare, everywhere I ran to, I would always see him. He was always on the green side of things, trying to cajole me. It was all a bad dream and I'm seconds away from waking, I just have to jumpstart that awakening.

I didn't stop running though. Nothing in the world could stop me from running right now. I veered myself onto another street that would eventually wind its way back to my house.

And so I ran, ran until I would die, which wouldn't be now. And all the way I could hear him. His voice smooth like lead, and just about as deadly. I screwed my eyes shut and kept running. My bag jumped jaggedly against my back, it hurt, but I couldn't stop, wouldn't stop, never stop.

I turned my head to the side, he was walking casually beside me. It made me angry, was he proving that I wasn't as good as he thought I was? I ran harder, faster, stronger. Taking longer strides; I kept running until I slammed into the letter box. I rolled on the grass, grass stains inevitably scratched into my knees and elbows. I lay panting, I felt like I was dying. If dying felt like you were about to throw up your lungs.

He stood at my head, I strained my head to look up at him. His blue eyes sank into mine and I know I had lost. I lost everything. But I wouldn't give up; I couldn't, not because of him. I got up in a jolt and I knew he was as surprised as I was that I was still able to move. I didn't even think that maybe, just maybe I was over reacting, no, not even if this was foolish. No. I picked up the rose that was on my door step and he smiled. A heart wrenchingly beautiful smile. I win.

And, like all good moments, everything comes crashing down on you when the one coherent and logical thought comes to mind. I. Have. A. Rose. In. My. Hand. I started to shake in fear again. He smiled even wider and I knew it was him. It was his entire fault. It was his entire fault that this is happening.

I flipped the card.

And I know,
It takes 22 steps,
From the walk to your door,
It takes 22 steps,
Because I've tried it before,
And one day I'll knock,
But just not yet.

-22 Steps, Damien Leith

I looked up and he was still standing there, the mirth in his eyes told me that he would be laughing. But he wasn't. And it irked me even more. Then, reality caught up to me again. Once again.

They know where I live. He knows where I live.

What to do, what to do, what to do! I shivered from a cold gust of wind, he pointed in a random direction. I did the opposite and ran in another direction, turning left instead of right. I ran as far as I could, and I didn't want to run anymore.

I had had enough. No more. I quit, give up, surrender. I tripped on something and fell. My body felt like it was submerged in icy water while it was set on fire. The heat and coolness didn't bring any relief to each other. I lose. There was no more. I had nothing left. They knew too much. They know everything.

I felt like a pawn. But pawns had their time to shine right? When they become queens?

But how many make it to the very end?

O.Dive. Love It. Hate It. Review It.

Holy Blank. I've made it longer for you because I felt that I owed it to you because I've been updating tiny baby chapters. It took me ages to write. There will be mistakes, because I felt like if I was as panicky as Naruto is, it might make it all the more realistic. And he is hallucinating. My brother raised a point that "he's alive" and no, he's not. I hope you got that.

To tell you the truth, I didn't expect it to turn out like this. I had a vague image, but nothing like this. I think I might have dragged it on for too long, but that's the way he thinks. This is one of my favourite chapters.

Damien Leith is the 2006 Australian Idol winner. This song, 22 Steps, is one of his newer ones. Thirsty Merc is an Australian band; Someday Someday is one of songs that associates with something in my life. But I'm not going to share.

The Green Box that he dropped in the toilet? Eclipse Spearmint Mints. My addiction.

There so much more I want to explain. So, if theres anything you don't understand, I am always willing to explain to you.

CHAPTER IDEAS. LET THEM ROLL! Your running out of time.