Chapter XI: Trite But True
The curses that flew through Mallymkun's brain were many and colorful.
And all were aimed primarily at herself.
You idiotic rodent! was one of the kinder mental self-attacks. Why are you so scared? If he really intended to make a move of any kind, he would have done it by now! Besides, you can fight him off! You've done it before, you can do it again!
...Can't you?
Sure, it was easy enough to say and think, but in action, she found herself uncertain.
After all, although she would never admit it, she still loved him, and hoped, in some way, that he loved her...
Dear God, you're an idiot...
Yeah. Lovestruck. Now shut up, I have an appointment.
The mental argument and insults ended here.
She came to Russehc's burrow. She had to admit, there was something about him that kept her attention, despite the fact nothing really changed during their visits. It was funny...they'd talked so much by now, it seemed they'd pretty much run out of things to say, yet they were somehow able to hold conversations without words. "Silent communications," so to speak. A flick of an eyebrow, a twitch or curl of the lip; all were signs. They had spoken about nearly everything she could think of...only two things, in fact, were never touched upon.
One of these was politics. This was because, as Russ pointed out to her, it was a subject he truly tried not to bother himself with, unless absolutely necessary.
The glance over her shoulder after he had said this earned her a mental slap in the face.
The other was personal matters. This was ironic, since whenever Mally saw Russ, she felt a sense of longing and puzzlement, and thousands of questions filled her head...but once they began talking, or eating, or even just staring into each other's eyes, all of these questions seemed to vanish into the dark places in her mind that she couldn't quite reach, and never got asked. As for why Russ never asked, Mally did not know, but suspected her reactions to his questions during their first lunch together had something to do with it.
At tea, conversation was more open...the March Hare's mental state was often a topic of jokes and discussion, and the Mad Hatter was always ready with riddles (most had no answers) and word games. Recently, he had begun asking more questions about Russ and his life...but the answers given were vague at best. As Tarrant had once said to her after asking such a question – namely, one regarding what Russehc's parents were – and receiving the word "dormice" as an answer: "This new friend of yours is worse than Chessur when it comes to whole answers!"
That was another glance back, and that lead to another mental smack.
Nevertheless, she could hardly wait to see Russ again. As she approached his burrow, tucked under the rosebush, she suddenly felt unease creep back into her mind, although she had dispelled it only moments before. The source of her caution was different, however, than before.
You see, Russehc had always waited for Mallymkun outside his burrow's entrance every time she came to see him.
This time, he was nowhere in sight.
Immediately fearing the worst, the white dormouse placed a paw on her pin-sword's hilt, and carefully stepped down the passage.
She tip-toed along for a while...then abruptly broke into a run.
Which was just as abruptly stopped when she slammed into something, rolled along the tunnel ground, and found herself lying on top of...
Russehc, who stared up with an expression that could be mildly described as startled.
For a second, the two just stared at each other.
Then, noticing the embarrassing position they were in, they quickly untangled themselves from each other and stood.
"Sorry," Mally said.
"No, no, my fault," Russ replied, dusting off his hat, which had fallen from his head. "I was not watching my step."
"Neither was I."
"Well, in that case, it is either both of our faults or neither of ours."
Mally shrugged. Russ chuckled and beckoned her to follow him.
"So, what's on the menu today?"
"You'll see, Mally. I have a surprise for you..."
Here, Mally stopped short.
"A surprise? For me?"
"Yes, for you. I said that, did I not?"
"What is it, then?"
"Well, if I told you, Mally, then it wouldn't be a surprise anymore, now would it?"
"...Good point."
Russ rolled his eyes slightly and continued down the tunnel.
When they reached the main chamber, Mally looked at Russehc's surprise, lying in the center of the floor...
A miniature picnic basket and a folded blanket.
She looked from the basket, to Russ, to the basket again, and then back up to Russ.
"A...picnic?"
Russ nodded.
"Is that the surprise?"
Russ seemed hurt.
"You don't like it?"
"Well...I guess it's not that bad..."
"I'll take that as a compliment..."
"But...you realize how very...'old hat' this is?"
The male's smile told her he felt the same thing.
"I simply thought it would be a nice change of pace."
Mally mulled this over for about five seconds.
"I guess you're right...still, it's not much different...it's just outside..."
Which is somewhere I'd rather not be at the moment...
Smack!
Russ shrugged.
"Well, if you don't want to do it, we could try something else..."
"No, it's all right. But..."
She paused.
"But...?"
"But...can we just stay on the bank? I don't really want to go too far from here."
Russ cocked his head to one side, raising an eyebrow at the same time.
"Why not?"
"Because...well, because the Hare and the Hatter might need me for something, and they expect me to be here."
Russehc's curiosity was only whet.
"But they've never needed you any other time before. And I, for one, cannot think of any immediate threatening things that could pose any harm to them."
"Well, you never know," Mally said quickly. "I mean, life is unpredictable..."
Her friend's bland, frank expression told her he didn't buy it, but wasn't going to press the matter.
She reacted to this with an expression of gratitude.
Smack!
Russ took the basket and the blanket and began to exit. Mally followed.
"Well, where shall we set up?"
The female dormouse looked around until she spotted a small area that was relatively dry and clear on the bank of the brook, and pointed it out. Russ nodded and put the basket down.
"Give me a hand, please?" he asked, gesturing with the blanket. Mally smiled and began to help him unfold it.
"One question, Russ..."
"Hm?"
"Why, of all things, a picnic?"
Russ paused as the blanket was unfurled and laid out, and set to flattening the edges.
"In all honesty," he said slowly, "I really couldn't think of anything else at the time..."
Mally laughed.
"And here I was beginning to think you were actually smart!"
"Well, that was rude..."
"I'm kidding."
"I know."
Here the gray dormouse in the blue suit began to unpack the basket. There were sandwich fixings – squimberry jam, cheese, and white bread – pieces of fruit, mostly strawberries and oranges, and Mally's personal favorite, treacle-pepper tarts.
"I will never understand you."
Russehc looked up fast.
"I'm sorry?"
"How, and why, is it that you are always able to make my favorite snack, yet I don't even know if you have a favorite, and what it is, and furthermore never seem to run out of ingredients?"
Russ smirked and went back to unpacking the basket.
"I have my ways."
"That's what you said when the Hatter asked you how you were able to afford such a nice suit..."
"Yes, but in that case, that was what one refers to as a joke."
"So, it wasn't expensive?"
"No. It was, as they say, a steal."
Here the male froze.
"Blast..."
"What's wrong?"
He turned to Mally with an embarrassed smile.
"Leave it to me to forget something to drink. I'd prepared something, too, but I left it in the kitchen..."
"I'll get it."
"Thank you, but-"
"I insist. There's a difference between a gentleman and a slave."
Russ shook his head with silent laughter.
"Very well, Mally. Thank you very much."
Mally smiled, nodded, and ran back to the burrow. She went into the kitchen, and spotted two wine glasses and a pitcher of lemonade on the counter top. She rolled her eyes.
Lemonade. As if the picnic itself wasn't hackneyed enough...
She reached for the cups and pitcher...
CRANG!
Startled, the dormouse whipped around at the source of the sound. It sounded like something had fallen...
She spotted a passage she had not noticed before (which made sense, as this was only the second time she'd seen Russehc's kitchen, and the first time she hadn't actually entered the room). Her curiosity enticed, she entered it.
What she saw was surprising.
Crudely carved furniture of all kinds and what appeared to be paintings (done badly) were piled up nearly to the "ceiling," and doing nothing but gathering dust on one side of the room. On the other side of the room was what appeared to be a miniature fireplace, with a hole in its top leading up to somewhere above the ground.
And ashes were scattered around, while a large, soot-covered shovel was lying on the floor. It seemed that it was the shovel that had fallen.
Mally stared for a few seconds at this and then left the room.
Interesting...why would he be burning furniture and commodities? Russ doesn't seem to be the sort to burn things for no reason at all...I don't think he's THAT kind of crazy...
Maybe he's trying to hide something...
Mally shook the thoughts away – at least partially – from her mind as she took the pitcher and glasses and headed back out.
Russ had laid out the food in the center of the blanket, and was seated on one side. He waved to Mallymkun as she approached. She handed him one of the cups and the pitcher. He poured her a glass of lemonade, and then poured another for himself.
"A toast," he said in his strangely soft voice, raising his glass. "To friendship?"
"Why not?"
For a while, neither spoke. Mally picked up a tart and began to eat, while Russ made himself a cheese sandwich.
"Mally?" he began after a while.
"Yes?"
"I'm curious...why do you keep looking at your tail?"
Smack!
"No reason," she mumbled, then said out loud, "May I ask you something?"
"Anything you like?"
"Well, when I went to get the lemonade, I noticed a room filled with...things, and it looked like you were burning them."
A pause.
"I just can't understand why?"
Russ seemed to think for a minute before answering.
"Well, I must admit, the hole wasn't always mine..."
"Yeah, I figured that out a long time back. But that doesn't answer my question."
"Well, it seems a rat owned the burrow before I, and no one I knew wanted to buy furniture from a rat's former home, so I put it all away and began to burn it...it's not like I could just throw the stuff into the river."
Mally pondered this, and decided that it made sense.
"Well, all right...but you could have just sold it to a junk dealer, or something..."
"I suppose I could have. Anyway, after I put it all into storage, I decided that I'd do some redecorating...nearly everything you see was put in by me after I took the place."
"Well, I'll confess, you certainly have a better eye for decoration, to say nothing of practicality...one chair in there looked like it would have needed help just to stand. The legs were thinner than a borogove's ankles..."
"Rats will be rats."
Mally shrugged. She'd lost count of how many times she'd done that during her meetings with Russ...
"I have a question for YOU now."
"Shoot."
"With what pistol?"
Mally glared in annoyance as she prepared a sandwich.
"Ask your question, Russehc."
"Well...I've already inquired about it once before, but I find myself curious about it again...and, seeing as how we're friends now, and have been...seeing each other..."
Mally groaned softly.
"Does this have to do with my father?"
"...Yes."
"Well, forget it. I am not going to talk about it."
Russ put down his glass (which was empty) and crossed his arms over his chest.
"Why is it so hard for you to talk about it?"
"Well, because..."
She stopped.
"Nice try."
Russ sighed.
"Mally, talking about pain can help lessen it. He may have hurt you, but-"
Mally stood up, a paw on her blade.
"How did you know he hurt me?"
Without hesitation, Russ replied, "The Hatter told me."
"That's a lie!" hissed Mallymkun, her eyes narrowing into a death stare. "He knows I don't like people knowing about my problems. Heck, he barely knows about half of them himself! He's my best friend, and I know he wouldn't tell anyone things about me without asking me first, because he knows if he did I'd cut his eyes out and sell them to a fisherman for bait. Now, tell me the truth: HOW DID YOU KNOW?"
There was a very tense pause.
"In all honesty, I didn't know. I was guessing. After all, whenever the word 'father' is mentioned, you seem to wince, and whenever it is spoken directly to you, you grow angry and defensive, not unlike the way you are right now."
The blade was now drawn.
"You have some nerve, you know that?"
"Stabbing things won't help. Nor will slicing, scratching, poking, or slashing. I'm only trying to help."
"Help what, exactly? My temper? Because that's certainly working."
"No, your emotions. Healing takes time."
Mally growled.
"You speak to me like I'm a pup. I'm not a girl anymore, and I'll let you know I can heal on my own. You're nothing but an arrogant fool."
Russ smirked.
"Maybe you're right. However, after what I just said and did, a real, grown-up lady would have punched me in the eye."
Mally snarled and raised a fist...
And remained like that for a few seconds.
Then she smiled, sighed, and lowered it.
"Why can't I stay angry with you?"
Russ shrugged.
"I don't know, but right now, I'm glad of it."
Mally smiled wider.
"I think I'd better go."
Russehc looked greatly upset.
"I'm sorry...I didn't mean to make you so mad with me..."
"No, it's not that. I just think I'd better get back to the tea table...it's about that time anyway."
"There's nothing I can do to convince you to stay a while longer?"
"Not that I can think of, no."
Russ sighed, this time in mock grief, and stood extending a paw.
"We are friends, still?"
Mally raised her paw...
And her fist connected with his right eye, knocking him to the ground.
Russ let out a yelp, holding his eye in one paw, then looked up, his mouth shut tight, his expression on the verge of terror.
Mallymkun just smiled teasingly.
"Friends," she confirmed, and walked away as if nothing had happened.
She giggled softly as she heard the male behind her grumble as he began to pack up the blanket and basket.