AN: Sorry it took so long but a lot of shit goes down in this chapter and it took a while lol! Hope you enjoy!
Chapter 11
Sometime around 3 Ian left to meet with someone about a possible photo shoot, Mel had to get to UCLA where she'd been accepted to file some finical aid paperwork and Eddie and Loren had to get to the studio to give final approval on the songs she'd recorded. Loren wasn't too excited about going to the studio...Kelly was going to be there and while Loren wouldn't deny that she was a great manager she just didn't trust Kelly. She was always pushing Loren to record songs that she didn't like...be someone she didn't want to be. Loren didn't mind standing up to her she'd done more to stronger willed people but she just pretended to be so nice about it. Please...Loren wasn't born yesterday.
They walked into the studio and Loren was somewhat surprised to see Max and Katie. They were holding hands and smiling. Loren wondered what kind of lives they lived before everything. The fame, the fortune, the family. She wondered if they struggled, maybe they were solid middle class...maybe not but whatever it was she knew that she'd never seen anyone with kidder eyes than anyone of the Duran's.
"Hello!" Katie said wrapping her arms around Eddie and following suit with Loren. Max did the same; Loren was not yet comfortable with the amount of touchy feely stuff that went on in this family but she decided not to say anything.
"Hi." Loren replied smiling. "This is a nice surprise. What are you two doing here?"
"Oh we just thought that since you were finalizing everything today we could be here for moral support. You know, people on the business side are more concerned with bottom lines and less concerned with the art. You could always use a little back up." Max smiled breezily.
"Thanks, so much!" Loren laughed "I've realized that over the last few months."
"Your finished with the album now right?" Katie asked. Her voice was sweet and soothing. It reminded Loren of her mother.
"Yeah, we cut the last track last week it all happened really fast!"
"That's how it goes." Max laughed. Kelly and Jake walked down with some of the record producers and lead them up to the office making the obligated chit chat on the way.
"So, Loren," Kelly began sitting across from Loren, Eddie, Katie and Max with the producers and Jake. "We all loved all your songs but we were thinking of adding a few more to the album."
"Oh...really? There are all ready like fifteen songs on this track...isn't any more a little much?"
"Well we were thinking that we wanted to show all your sides. Most of your songs were happier and introverted which were great! But we'd like to show a darker, angrier of you as well a you know... a little more dangerous."
"Dark? Dangerous? I really feel like that's the wrong way to go. I'm not that angry of a person." Loren said leaning forward slightly.
"Well this would be part of your stage persona we've discussed." Loren suppressed an eye roll at this comment...she and Kelly had been clashing about a stage persona a lot lately...Loren thought that Kelly was trying to turn her into something she wasn't. Eddie had agreed her and backed her up all the way on this point. She felt extraordinarily grateful for that.
"Look, Kelly we've talked about this. I understand that a stage persona is a big part of this business but I feel like that it should still be me."
"And it will be. I mean Loren look at your life, getting abandoned by your dad, your moms death, foster care, a consent struggle to survive! You must have anger in you about it!"
Loren had to take a moment. She had to breathe she had to remind herself that jumping across this table and clawing Kelly's eyes out would not solve anything and could land her in jail. She had to be calm. After a moment she realized that calm would not be an option for her so she settled for quietly angry. The room had been silent since Kelly spoke. No one knew what to say or what would be said.
"Kelly," Loren said in a loud horse whisper, anger seeping from her voice. "I don't like people who manipulate other people, I don't like it when people try to use things that caused someone pain to get what they want. And I absolutely hate it when people tell me how I'm supposed to feel about any given situation." She took a breath to settle herself and steady her voice. "I can tell Kelly that you don't understand foster care kids, I can tell you didn't struggle for anything in your life, I can tell that your cut throat and willing to hurt others to get what you want. I'm ok with you continuing to represent me...but make no mistake, I don't give third chances. I'm considering this your second and if you ever try to use my past to get me to do something I'm not comfortable with or get something you want from me again I will walk out the door faster then you can say foster. Are we understood?"
The room was silent. Kelly looked as if she'd been slapped across the face. She'd had a difficult time with Loren...trying to get her to do this or that and Kelly really did feel that it was best for Loren's career. Maybe it was pushing her too much but if the end result was success wasn't that the goal? She didn't relize the pitfalls of that...of how one day Loren would fail if she wasn't true to herself when she started. Kelly really had thought using Lorens past would get her to be edgier...all it did was get her to threaten to fire Kelly.
Katie was baffled. She couldn't believe how willing Kelly was to exploit Loren. She'd never liked Kelly very much she was too into the business and not into the art itself enough. She was surprised at how well Loren handled the situation.
"Loren, that wasn't my intention." Kelly started.
"Yeah, Kelly it was, and that's Ok. I'm beginning to realize that's just who you are. But I think it's high time you realize who I am. Why don't we table this for now. I've approved the tracks we've all ready recorded and for now that's all we need. Is there anything else you need me to sign while I'm here?"
"No, no that was it. Your free to go."
"Thanks." And with that Loren left the room feeling happy with the result. She was fairly certain that Kelly wouldn't try to push her again and Loren hoped that if she did it would happen after the album dropped. Hopefully it would do well and if she wasn't happy with Kelly she could go to another manager with an easier transition. Eddie and his parents left with her.
"Hey, Lo are you ok? Kelly took it way to far in there." Eddie said wrapping her in a hug.
"Absolutely, I can't believe she tried to exploit you like that. You can be sure that I'm going to speak to Jake about it as soon as possible." Katie said placing a gentle hand on her shoulder.
"She needs to understand boundaries better...she had no right to say those things to you." Max added.
"Thanks guys that means a lot." Loren said. She was happy to have their support in this and she felt extremely raw from the whole thing. She couldn't stand it! Why in the world did Kelly think she had the right to say those things to Loren? Did she even comprehend how painful it was for Loren to relive that?
The group began to descend the stairs to the lobby when a man in a suit stopped them. "Loren." he said.
She turned to face him it was James, he was the money man. He handled all the accounts and finances for the record label. "Yeah?" She asked.
"I have your first installment check." He said. "Since you've fulfilled the contract for the number of tracks and all the photo shoots are done you get it now and after the album drops and we see how it does you'll get the percentage of the profits; as we discussed." Loren was surprised. She knew that the contract she signed stated that she would get two checks a flat payment for completing the album and after the album dropped she'd get 40% of the profits for the number of copy's sold. She just didn't really expect to make money unless the album sold. She was surprised that she'd get a check today.
"Oh, wow thanks James." She said taking the envelope he handed her feeling a bit overwhelmed about the events of the day.
"No problem Loren, you deserve it. I'm sure we'll see great things from you." He said before disappearing into his office to handle some other account.
"Thanks." she said again. When she looked up all the Duran's grinning from ear to ear. Eddie thought back to when he got his very first big check he felt like he was truly independent for the first time. Loren had been independent for a long time now, since she was a child even; he thought that it most likely felt different for her like she and Mel had a shot at a better life. He was fairly certain that she felt just as amazing as he did though.
"Congratulations girl!" Katie said wrapping Loren. Eddie and Max added their own congratulations and wanted to take Loren out to dinner to celebrate but Loren had other ideas.
"I really want to tell Mel about all this." She said checking the time. "I think she should be about done with orientation now she said she was going to head home after. Do you guys want to come?" She asked.
"Yeah, yes of course." Eddie said surprised. Loren had stealthy avoided the topic of her place. Eddie had asked to come over a few times but she always got out of it saying that Mel had an early shift or something. He got the feeling she didn't want him to see her place. He also thought that the fact that Loren was willing to show him and his parents now probably had something to do with the check she just got. He was right. On both counts.
Eddie was shocked when Loren pulled into a dirty lot next to a shabby looking building. He got it now. She didn't want him to see where she lived because she knew that he would think it wasn't safe enough for two girls to be living alone. She was right. The apartment itself was basically what he expected used furniture he assumed she got for free off craigslist white walls with cracks in some places, a small kitchen and one bedroom. Now that he thought about it she had mentioned something about her and Mel sharing a room.
"Mel! You here?" Loren called through the small place excitedly.
"Yeah?" She said coming out of the bedroom. She did not expect to be full on tackled until she was laying flat on her back on the soft carpet. "OW!" she called semi irritated.
"Look! Look! Look!" Loren said quickly shaking the envelope in Mels face.
"Ok what am I looking at?"
"My first check from the label!" Loren said excitedly as Eddie and his parents laughed looking at the pair tumbled on the floor.
"OH MY GOD!"
"Do you know what this means Mel?" Loren said pulling Mel up.
"Um that you gonna be rolling in Lamborghini's?"
"No that you and me are moving somewhere great with like weather that's always hot and heat and AC that doesn't break all the time! And your not gonna have to work just concentrate on school! And for once in our lives things are gonna be a little bit easier for us!" Loren stumbled on the words as they spilled out of her mouth as the two embarrassed.
After about an hour Eddie and his parents excused themselves so the sisters could have some time alone to think about their new lives. Several hours passed before Eddie heard from Loren. When she did call him she said that Mel had gone out with Tyler and asked if he wanted to do something. He invited her over and it was sometime around ten when she showed up. They were settled in watching television when Eddie finally asked.
"Why did you wait until today to ask me over to your place?"
The question didn't totally surprise Loren. She knew he wouldn't like her place. Not because he was a snob or because he thought that it was beneath him. It was because Eddie was the type that worried. She knew that he would worry about her in that not so safe neighborhood with the four bolt locks on the door. She didn't want him to offer what she knew he would. To help her pay for a better place for her and Mel or even for both of them to move into his place. She didn't want that. She didn't want to feel like he was buying her. That's not how he would have seen it. It's not how his brain worked. But it's how hers worked and she knew others would assume the same.
"I just knew how you'd react and I didn't want to worry you." Loren said.
"Loren," Eddie said softly turning off the television and turning to face her. "We need to be honest with each other. You can't not tell me something that I should know because you won't like the way I'll react."
"That wasn't my intention Eddie. I was living there before I even met you and there wasn't anything either of us could have done about it until now and I didn't want to argue about it."
"I could have helped you get a new place. Or you and Mel could have stayed with me until you were able to move to a safer place."
Loren ran an exasperated hand through her long hair. Eddie had seen her do this a few times over the past month. "Eddie you just can't do that!" Loren said exhausted she knew where this was going and she wasn't particularly thrilled about it.
"Why not?"
"Because! Because then it's like your buying me like I'm just some street walker sleeping with you because you have money. I don't want to feel like that and I don't want other people thinking like that about me."
"I don't understand why you would feel that way Loren! It wouldn't have been like that. I would have made the offer even if there was nothing between us."
"But even if there hadn't been anything between us I wouldn't have taken it and neither would Mel!"
"Why not!" Eddie demanded.
"Because we're not a charity case Eddie!"
Meanwhile with Mel and Tyler...
Tyler had taken Mel out to a club with the help of her fake ID. The club was loud and their was a feeling of freedom among the patrons that night. Mel and Tyler danced for a while before Mel headed to the bathroom and Tyler went to get them something to drink. At the bar Tyler ran into none other then Chloe Carter.
"What are you doing here?" he asked.
"Surprised?" She smirked.
"With you? Always." he grinned at her. She eyed the room as she spoke to him. The two of them lightly flirting as they always did. Chloe was jealous. She'd admit it. Not to him but to herself. She loved Tyler...she always had. He just couldn't give her everything she wanted to she would be with other guys who could open doors for her. She'd always planned on leaving whomever she was with once she had her own career and fortune and going back to the boy she'd known if Fresno. The problem was that Tyler wasn't the type to wait around. However, he also wasn't the type to be exactly loyal to whomever he was with if Chloe came calling...as the two of them had proven when she'd came to see Tyler the other day.
"Where's your little high schooler?" Chloe asked.
"She's in college. She graduated a few months ago."
"Oh well isn't that nice." Chloe said sarcastically.
As the two of them continued their banter Chloe saw Mel walking over to the bar and decided to make her move. She leaned in closer to Tyler and whispered. "I wont tell her if you wont."
Then they kissed a long and deep kiss that left Tyler breathless as she pulled away. The stars in his eyes dimmed considerably when he heard the unmistakable voice of Mel say. "Let me guess. Your Chloe right?"
"Why yes...who might you be?"
"Someone who used to know Tyler." Mel said flatly as she reached for her purse which she'd left with him.
"Mel wait." Tyler said trying to grab her hand.
"Save it Ty, your so not worth the hassle." She said pulling it out of his reach and heading for the door to find a cab. He didn't follow her. It was then that it dawned on him that this was his life now. Chloe was never going to settle for anyone who couldn't buy her fancy things but she also would never let him just be happy with a girl he liked. She was like a toxin killing everything around her. And he was stuck in the same place and couldn't get away.
When Mel got to the street she expected to see a cab. She did not expect to see Ian. But none the less there was no cab and one Ian standing before her.
"Hey Mel!" he smiled at her.
"Hey Ian." She smiled back.
"Hows the night going?" He asked with his accent in full affect. She'd always had a thing for British guys.
"Kind of a bust."
"It doesn't have to be." He said. "Wanna get out of here? I know a great all night diner."
"Sure" she smiled. He was right maybe this night would turn out better then she thought.
Back with Eddie and Loren
The fight had continued and escalated. He didn't understand where she was coming from. Why wouldn't she accept his help? Why wouldn't she let him in? Why wouldn't she just admit she felt the same way he did for God's sake! The fight had soon switched from the whole apartment thing to the fact that Loren was still shutting Eddie out.
"You don't even call me your boyfriend Lo!" Eddie said exasperated.
"We're exclusive! You said that we could take this slow Eddie! You said you wouldn't push me!"
"I don't want to push you Loren, but I want to feel like I'm not the only one who feels something here!"
"Your not Eddie! Of course I feel something for you! I'm here aren't I?!"
"Being here isn't enough Lo! I need you to be open with me! I need you to talk! God, I need you to tell me how you feel and I'm tired of walking on egg shells to try and avoid setting you off or unleashing a whole lecture on how serious we are! And I'm so sick and fucking tired of feeling like a chick who's trying to get some guy to commit!"
"I don't mean for you to feel that way Eddie but this is hard for me! I've never been the type to jump into something like this. Like ever Eddie this is all new to me!"
"And I get that Lo, I really do but I need to feel like your giving something into this too! I need to feel like I'm not with some heartless robot!" the words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. He'd gone too far. He was so angry and frustrated with her that he'd said she was heartless. He knew she wasn't. She maybe had the biggest heart he'd ever seen. It had just been hurt a lot in her life so it was buried deep inside her where she could protect it.
"Well, I didn't know I was such a monster." Loren said. She was surprised at how much his words had hurt her...it was as if he'd punched her in the gut and she was lost for breath. "I'm gonna go home...I'll see you later." She said as she whipped around and headed for the door."
"No, Loren don't go" Eddie tried but it was too late she was through the door and into the elevator.
After she'd gone Eddie wasn't sure what to do. He was still pissed at her for all the reasons they'd been fighting about but he was also angry at himself for hurting her. He took his frustrations out on a lamp which sat on a side table by throwing it against the wall and leaving it there smashed to pieces on the floor as he went upstairs to take a shower.
Loren on the other hand had gone to a bar around the corner. She had a fake ID but this place was a little whole in the wall and hadn't asked her for one. She sipped her drink as she replayed the fight in her head.
She blamed herself. She'd known...she'd known all along this would happen. That the shit would hit the fan and it wouldn't work out. Now it would be awkward whenever she saw him...but that wasn't the worst thing.
The worst thing was she didn't want it to be over. She wanted to be his girlfriend. She hadn't wanted to admit it but she did.
Her phone rang...it was Mel. She answered.
"Hey."
"Hey. You sound weird is everything ok?" Mel asked.
"Yeah, every thing's fine Eddie and I just had a little fight is all." She said.
"Oh well are you gonna work everything out?"
"Yeah, we'll be fine." Loren said even though she wasn't sure it was true. "What about you how was the club with Tyler? "
"Sucko. I'm starting to think that he isn't who I thought he was."
"Well if I can give you any advice it would be to follow your instincts, they've gotten you this far and if they are telling you to cut and run that's what you should do." Loren said gently.
"Yeah, I think your right. I actually ran into Ian and we're at some diner he knows. I'm gonna be out late most likely."
"Ian?" Loren laughed. "That's a surprise."
"Yeah, that's what I thought when I saw him. I should probably go back in I've just stepped out for a smoke. But Lo, maybe you should follow your own advice with Eddie. I think your instincts are telling you to give it your all and I've watched you struggling to fight them since you two first met. Just go with your gut. Ok? You deserve to be happy."
"Yeah," Loren said. "I think I will. Goodnight Mel I love you."
"Night, Love you to Lo."
The conversation ended and a realization hit Loren. She quickly paid and ran back to Eddie's place hoping he was still there and would let her in. She didn't want to fight anymore. She didn't want to hide. She wanted to give it her all and most of all she wanted to tell him something.
The door was unlocked and she burst in. He was coming out of the kitchen wearing sweats his hair damp. She'd been gone for over an hour and he must have taken a shower.
"Hey," She said softly.
"Hey," He said back. "Look Loren, I'm really sorry about before. I shouldn't have said..."
"Eddie please stop. I really want to say something to you...I'm sorry. I'm so sorry! You were right about everything. I've been so petrified of this that I didn't want to jump all in but I don't want to be a coward anymore. I want you and I don't think that's gonna change. I was sitting at the bar just replaying the fight in my head and then Mel called and it dawned on me. Today at the label when I got the check...the only reason I wanted to tell Mel right away is because you were all ready there and knew. The first person I wanted to tell was you but you all ready knew. There has never been something that I didn't want to talk to Mel about before anyone else. But whenever something happens to me now I find myself thinking about what you would think or say or do. And when I realized that I realized something else. I realized that I love you Eddie. I love you and I want to be your girlfriend and I want to be with you...really with you and I don't want to keep fighting this and...and that's it...I don't have anything else to say." She ended with a slight chuckle.
Eddie crossed the room and pulled her into a hug followed by a long passionate kiss. "I love you to Lo, how could anyone not?"
She smiled. She honestly couldn't remember a time when she'd felt this happy.
End chapter 11.