OK, THIS TOOK LONGER THAN USUAL TO UPDATE. I'VE BEEN BUSY AND THIS IS A STRAINING STORY. BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS CHAPTER, ITS JUICIER THAN THE REST :)

DISCLAIMER: I DONT OWN ANYTHING, STEPHENIE MEY DOES

EPOV

Edward came to the grave yard quicker than he had expected. He cursed his speed, he cursed himself, he cursed his whole being. Edward looked on at Bella's grave and he could see so many people standing there, paying their moments of tribute. And the sun also shone on her grave stone, as if blessing her with its warmth. Edward had never felt so left out in his life. He couldn't go to his Bella, he couldn't lean over her grave and put the flowers he'd brought over her and tell her how much he loved her and how much he missed her and how sorry he was. A quiet, anguished cry escaped Edward's lips and he crumpled to the ground, uncontrollable sobs breaking through. The fake mask he had slowly built up over time for his family broke away. Everything was gone. He wasn't even himself anymore. Edward felt his torn, twisted soul struggle to rip free from his chest and join Bella in her grave. He sobbed and clawed at his chest as he'd done so many times before, trying to let go of the pain. But it was too much. He was too weak. Too weak to help himself, let alone save the only person who made his life worth living. Edward's gaze drifted to Bella's grave again. He could feel himself looking sanity. In a few moment's he would be beyond control. The agony would take over, the sadness, the loneliness, the helplessness, would take over.

Without a second thought, Edward rushed to Bella's grave. Thankfully, everyone had left and he was alone, finally. Edward carefully placed the freesias and roses and forget-me-nots that he had brought on Bella's grave. He gazed at the headstone for a while, and then he stroked the ground where she lay and broke down. He hunched up on the ground and sobbed, his head resting against the soft soil, and his nonexistent tears moistening the already damp dirt. He cried and sobbed, his body shaking uncontrollably. And without knowing what he was saying, Edward started blubbering his "I love you"s and "I'm sorry"s and "Please come back, I can't live without you"s. but his pleas were of no avail. Bella wasn't coming back, Edward knew that, yet he wished that she would. That she would at least give him some sign from heaven that she was there. That he was still worth something to her. Edward knew he didn't deserve it, he didn't deserve any love, any relief, and peace, but he still couldn't help longing for it. Time flew bye faster than Edward could imagine and soon it was midnight, and he was still sitting new her grave, letting his heart shatter with the knowledge of her death.

And then a soft noise disturbed the quiet peace of the brave yard. Someone was coming, Edward knew, and from the smell, it was a werewolf. Jacob was coming. The knowledge of that didn't affect Edward at all. Edward didn't hate Jacob anymore. Jacob didn't affect him. Jacob was just another nobody that happened to be in his life-when he had one, that is. Edward moved back and watched silently as Jacob came forward and paid his respects to Bella. Jacob totally ignored Edward and spoke to Bella quietly, telling her how much he cared about her, and apologizing, and vowing to get revenge for her. Much of what he said was similar to Edward but while Edward's voice was marred with sorrow and regret, Jacob's shook with anger. Jacob stood tall and his voice dared anyone to come near him, to challenge him, because it was clear that Jacob would have no problem ripping anyone in to pieces. Rip anyone into pieces. The sudden echoing of the last thought rung in Edward's head. He hastily leapt up and impatiently waited for Jacob to finish. Once he had, Edward drew a little closer to him.

"Jacob." Edward spoke softly.

"Bloodsucker." Jacob sneered. "Why are you here? I don't understand why you even bother. You're the reason why she's dead! You stupid leech! She loved you and you got her hurt her over and over until she died! Does that make you happy? Does that give you pleasure? Seeing someone so innocent and loving being ripped to pieces because of you? You're a monster, and Bella was too soft to see that; but I'm not. I want to just rip you apart with my teeth and slowly burn every little inch of you. I'd take so much satisfaction in seeing you burn. You can't imagine. Filthy…"

Edward silently listened to Jacob rant, nodding his head in agreement. "You're right, Jacob. I deserve the worst type of hell. I deserve to be burned alive, not even be given the mercy of being torn into pieces beforehand. Please, Jacob. Kill me. You have no idea what it's like. I can't live without Bella, it's like living without a soul. Jacob, I'm in hell. Help me, please, kill me!"

Jacob stared blankly at Edward for a moment and then his mouth curled into a cruel smile. "It's painful, Edward? You want to die? Well, I'm not going to kill you. You deserve every bit of this. You deserve to suffer. Do you have any idea what Bella went through when you left her? You deserve a million times worse. And you haven't gotten it yet. If you're so desperate, go kill yourself. I'm not about to help you. I'm not about to put you out of your pain. I hope you suffer. I hope you go insane. I hope you rip your own limbs off and break-physically, emotionally, mentally. Go writhe in earth's hell, cuz when you do die, Gods gonna have something much worse waiting for you." With that, Jacob turned and left.

Edward's lips parted in desperation and distress. He'd thought that Jacob would jump at the opportunity to kill him but instead, Jacob had just left; leaving him to deal with his misery in solitude, forever. And then one of Jacob's phrases entered his head: If you're so desperate, go kill yourself. Edward's mind went into overdrive. Suicide. Carlisle had tried it so many times before and never succeeded but perhaps Edward could find a way. The only things know to kill vampires so far were other vampires, werewolves and fire. The first two were out of the question but the third on stuck to Edward like a leech. Edward's eyes widened and his heart leapt at the opportunity to finally be out of this misery.

Edward ran, he ran all the way to the middle of the woods, where humans went camping. To his great joy, some campfires still remained even when the people had left. Edward slowly walked up to one of the gazed in the crackling flame. Between the red and orange and white flames, Edward could see Bella's face, beckoning him to the depth of the eerie glow and without knowing what he was doing, Edward reached out. His fingertips drew dangerously close to the fire, and the heat seared his skin, but Edward paid no attention. His eyes were locked somewhere far away. He could sense Bella calling him, he could see her hair waving as the flames went up and down. His eyes were filled with a strange masochistic joy and he embraced the pain of his burning fingertips and leaned in. But suddenly, the beautiful trance was over. Someone had dragged Edward away from the fire and was now shaking him harshly.

Reality came crashing back on Edward's head and his heart burned with the previous anguish. The chance was gone. And now Edward had to find another way to join Bella. And he vowed to do so, no matter what it took.

WELL, WASN'T THAT INTERESTING!? IT TOOK ME A WHILE TO WRITE. SO PLZ GIMME SOME REVIEW AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK. I'LL BE LOOKING FW TO READING THEM! :D