Authors note:

Harry Potter spoiler in this chapter. Let me know if you want it gone.

Chapter 11

The days go by slowly and Hiccup doesn't see Astrid once. Not in the cafeteria, not anywhere. Before he knows it, a week has gone by since the last time they were together at the lookout.

He doesn't really talk much, to anyone. Sometimes, Fish will ask him how he's doing, but that's it. It reminds him of how it used to be during those years when he was bullied. He'd feel the way he does now, sort of without purpose, and when he got home, a member of his family would ask him how he's doing, and he would answer saying that he's fine. But they'd know he wasn't. You can almost always tell when someone is fine for real, or when they're just saying that they are. That's why they'd never stop asking, as if he'd tell the truth if they only asked him enough times.

His dad hasn't called either. Why would he? He's got no reason to call. Hiccup himself thought about calling one of his sisters, but thought better of it. At least when he was bullied he'd have his family to ask him how he's doing; now he's only got Fish for that.

At least it's raining, he thinks, looking out the kitchen window. Had it been sunny it would have felt like the sun was mocking him. 'Why aren't you happy?' 'Why aren't you out in the sun with some friends?' Now he can stay inside moping without feeling guilty about it.

Fish walks out of the TV-room and into his bedroom; on the way over he asks him how he's doing again. "I'm alright." Barely talking all day has made his voice sound raspy. He probably doesn't look all right though, the way he's just sitting by the kitchen table, staring at nothing. He just doesn't feel like doing anything, so he sits. Sits in the light grey t-shirt and blue jeans he's been wearing for three days now. He did just take a shower however, so that's nice, at least he's feeling fresh.

There is a knock on the door. "Can you get it?" Fish asks from his bedroom. Hiccup doesn't answer, doesn't feel like making sounds with his mouth at the moment, but he gets up to open it.

There she is, standing in front of him. He's frozen in his place, not mentally prepared to face her, but he's glad that he is. Holding the doorknob tightly he takes her appearance in. Her slightly wet hair, from being out in the rain, he guesses. Her arms, wrapped around herself in a shielding manor. She's brought out a light jacket, as it's been getting chillier outside this past week. It's long and black, which makes her look like she's going to a funeral.

"We still need to see the last one." She says, but she wears a sad expression all the while. Hiccup knows what she means, but it seems a bit odd to him. They haven't seen each other in a week, the last words she spoke to him were wishes of him leaving her alone, and now she wants to watch a movie? Maybe it's just the oddness of hearing her voice again; during the week that passed he'd forgotten what it sounds like. He'd tried to remember, but he just couldn't.

"Who is it?" Fishlegs yells.

"Astrid." Hiccup answers, causing Fishlegs' room to go quiet. "Okay." He finally says.

Astrid walks ahead of Hiccup into the next room and sits down on the couch. With Hiccup still in the kitchen, she uses her time alone to pull herself together as she feels tears coming, caused by being overwhelmed from seeing Hiccup. He looked so different from the last time she saw him, which she knows is ridiculous because it was only a week ago. Her gaze follows him when he enters the room, but he doesn't meet it. He inserts the DVD of the last Harry Potter movie and joins her on the couch. Still not having said a word to her. When he sits down next to her, she can't help but enjoy the smell of his freshly washed hair and his usual, familiar scent.

Neither of them says anything during the course of the film. When they get to the scene where Lupin is laying motionless on the floor, dead, Hiccup looks over at Astrid and sees that silent tears are making their way down her cheeks.

Once the movie ends and the credits are rolling down the screen, Astrid sits up straighter on the couch, "I really thought he was going to die there for a while." She says in an attempt to break the tension. Hiccup looks at her, he's in a loss for words, doesn't know what to say to her as she's sitting there. She waits a moment before saying her next bit; she lets out a sigh and adjusts her position on the couch so that she is facing him.

"I don't want to be angry anymore." A glimmer of hope appears in Hiccup's eyes, "But I am." She finishes, killing the glimmer.

Hiccup opens his mouth to say something. He speaks with caution and a slight hint of desperation, "Maybe, if I told you what happened from my perspective, then maybe you would find it easier to understand. Understand how things ended up the way that they did, and it would help you forgive me." She can see the childish hope in his eyes, it makes her sad, but the next thing he says makes her even sadder.

His voice trembles and he's got tears in his eyes. "I'm really sorry Astrid, that I hurt you." It's a mere whisper; as if speaking louder would cause the tears to fall, cause him to start sobbing.

Astrid doesn't answer, instead she slides her phone out of her pocket. "Maybe if we went through all the messages, we can sort everything out." The way she speaks makes it sound like she is presenting her hypothesis on a scientific experiment. She really wants to forgive Hiccup, but first, she needs to know the whole truth, she's been looking through the messages all week, debating which messages are from Hiccup and which messages are from Fishlegs, but the uncertainty is driving her mad.

She scrolls back through the messages to the first conversation they had. They start to go through them and Hiccup explains to her that he was supposed to give Fish some Mutant Scarecrow lyrics from the song Astrid was talking about, but instead he just made up the cheesiest thing he could think of. To Hiccup's surprise, Astrid actually laughs when she hears the truth, "Brilliant." She lets out before she can stop herself. Hiccup smiles next to her.

"It's one of my favourite Scarecrow songs, the one I was listening to here."

"The lyrics are quite repetitive, but they're great, yes, they really succeeded with the lyrics on this track." Hiccup agrees. He looks at the rest of the messages, "All the rest of this conversation are us two speaking. I wasn't actually the one typing, I was just commenting on what Fishlegs told me that you wrote and he kept writing what I said."

Hiccup continues to go through the messages, "This is mostly Fishlegs … but this is me. Fish left the room here so I'm the one who typed these out." It doesn't seem like Fish texts Astrid much without Hiccup there.

"Here he just gave me the phone and told me to ask you questions." Astrid frowns. "Uhh, and then I sort of forgot that I was texting from Fishlegs phone, so I was talking about myself." He explains awkwardly. "Fish wasn't too happy with me after that." He says and Astrid laughs in her charming way, he didn't think he'd ever hear that sound again. "And right after this message, I realised that everyone at that lecture was staring at me because I was grinning like an idiot at my phone." He sighs while Astrid continues to laugh. He looks at her and they make eye contact. "That was when I was sent out … and I met you." Her smile falters until it disappears while they hold eye contact. The room is quite dark and they are sitting unnaturally close.

Astrid stands up and begins to walk away. "Where are you going, Astrid?" he calls after her. The front door opens and closes. "Don't go." He whispers to no one, because she obviously can't hear him anymore.

Authors note:

Would lie to make it clear that when Astrid is talking about the lyrics that she likes, she's really talking about the lyrics from the actual song, "The pros and cons of breathing", not the ones I made up. lololllll

What did you like/dislike about this chapter? Anything make you smile? Anything make you frown?

Thanks for reading!

July 22, 2015