Chapter 11: Names, Tiger, randomness, and probably typos

Everyone, including myself, was surprised when out of nowhere I pulled out a chain saw. It started up by itself, and I knew that this would be fun. I ran up to a bear who swiped at me with his claw. The claws harmlessly deflected against my weapon, and I sliced the bear's top half of and it flew down the mountain. Sheena sent the lower half down as well. The four of them that were not zombie like gave me strange looks. "I know as much about this as you," I said, turning the saw off.

"Normal people can't just pull a weapon out of thin air," Raine said.

"I never claimed to be normal. Normal people don't randomly appear on a Rheaird and fall out of the sky. Besides, Colette pulls her spinney things from no where."

"She is the chosen, so she can do that. You on the other hand appear to be just a normal human."

"Well, clearly I'm not. Let's just go to Meltokio and see what we can learn," I replied. I contemplated turning this saw back on and removing an arm from the professor, but decided that would not be a good idea.

The remainder of the path down the mountain was fairly uneventful. A couple monsters tried attacking us, but with my awesome abilities with this saw, they stood no chance. I guess those other people helped some too. We finally reached to bottom of the mountain, and I was way too tired. I was glad to be able to rest and then we could continue later. Of course, this didn't happen though. We still had to walk all the way to Meltokio! This heavy saw didn't help any! Have any of you carried a twenty-pound chain saw down a mountain? It ain't easy, that's for sure.

We gazed of in the distance and Lloyd said he thought he saw Meltokio. Lloyd and I ran of in the direction on this city, him wanting to see the world, and me, just wanting to get this trip over with. We stopped abruptly when we heard Sheena's voice, "Guys, you are going in the wrong direction." Lloyd will be lucky to be alive once I am done with him. We hurried back and started walking in the opposite direction. I need rest, my legs were not meant to walk this much, the saw is not fun to carry around everywhere, and I am going to painfully kill whoever put me here!

After much time of walking and complaining, we finally reached Meltokio. I may not have had a perfect memory of the game, but I remembered where the inn was. I ran in there to book a room. "I'll take the room closest to this spot please."

"That will be 100 gald please," he responded.

I handed him my credit card, and he was quite confused. "I'm sorry sir; we don't take this type of money." That is when I lost it.

"Listen here! I just walked from the Fuji Mountains, to Meltokio after driving my car off a cliff and crashing into the mountain! Now you will give me a room or else!" I yelled as I turned my saw on. I think he just soiled himself as he just stood there shaking.

"F-first one o-on the lef-t si-ir." He stammered.

"Thank you," I said turning off my weapon of death. I walked down the hallway to the room. It was locked. I could just walk back to the desk and get the key, but I didn't have time. I used the saw to cut the hinges of the door and pushed it down. Good night world, see you when I haven't walked dozens of miles in a day.

_

I awoke and saw that the door was back in place and it looked like the sun had set and risen in the time I slept. Sleep was good, but getting back to my world would be better. I stumbled awake and tripped over a soft object. I fell over and landed on a very lumpy floor. "Get off me," the lump said. Either I have gone to a new level of insanity, and now think the floor is talking to me, or I landed on Genis. With the recent events, I'm not really sure.

"Sorry bout that," I said as I rose to my feet again.

"That's fine."

"What are you doing here anyway?"

"Well we wanted to keep an eye on you in case you were dangerous, so the inn keeper let us stay in here if we fixed the door."

"So you watch me by sleeping?"

"Well Lloyd was supposed to be awake during the second shift." We both turned and saw the swordsman sleeping standing up, with his head against the wall. Genis grabbed his shoe and prepared to throw it at him. I stopped him by grabbing his hand.

"I have a better idea," I said as I walked over to him. Normally I would be sneaking, but with Lloyd, I didn't have to. I picked up the saw, and swung the blunt end at his head. Genis' eyes widened as he saw his friend tumble along the ground.

"What was that for?" the sleepy guard asked.

"Sleeping on the job. At least I don't sleep when I guard things."

"Was that necessary?" Genis asked.

Honestly, that might have been a bit overboard, but it was fun. "Someone who can sleep that easily standing up, sometimes needs a rude awakening." Lloyd rubbed his head and Genis nodded. We then exited the room, met with Raine and Colette and continued on our way to the castle.

We reached the steps that lead to the upper district, and there were way too many. Might as well get it over with. I challenged Lloyd to a race to the top. We ran, and I saw Lloyd was beating me. If you can't out run someone then outsmart him, and in Lloyd's case that wouldn't be hard. "Lloyd your shoe is untied," I said. He looked down while he continued to run. He tripped and fell up the next five stairs. I passed him though and beat him by barley two steps.

Once he caught up to me, he looked down to tie his shoes. "My shoes weren't untied," he said looking back up at me.

"Oh sorry, must have been a trick of the light," I lied.

"Oh, okay," Lloyd said. Genis and Raine resisted laughing at their friend while Colette just floated their like she always does. She really creeps me out.

We then continued on our way to the castle until we met up with a certain red haired chosen. "Why hello my cool beauty," he said walking up to Raine. "And who might you be my angel," he said turning to Colette. As he went to place his hand on her, she grabbed it and flung him through the air. I'm starting to like Colette's weird angel form now. "That was a surprise," he said as he landed on his feet. His collection of noble women checked to make sure he was unharmed. Those chicks really need to pick better men.

"Chosen," another girl said as she walked down the stairs.

"Oh, I don't remember seeing you before," he said. The girl walked down the stairs with two swords at her sides along with dirty blond hair and blue eyes.

"You unfaithful chosen," he said walking toward him. Strange, I thought Sheena was the only one who treated him like this. This girl ain't even hot like she was. I then saw that Sheena was a lot less violent then this new person. She walked over to Zelos, pulled out a claw gantlet thing-a-magigers, and began beating him upside the head with it. I considered going to help him, but I enjoyed him being in pain, and I know better then to mess with a crazy women who is enjoying someone else's pain. After a few moments of pummeling Zelos into a pudding like form, she stopped. Zelos said something resembling ouch, but it was hard to tell.

"Happy now Stacy?" another person said, as he walked down the stairs.

"Yea, that was fun," the violent woman responded.

"Okay, Regal should be in the coliseum so you should be able to see him," the man said.

"Awesome," she said as she ran in the direction of the coliseum. I defiantly didn't remember those events occurring in the game.

"W-what are you doing here?" Genis asked this new person with violent friends.

"Wait, you remember me?" he responded.

"Yea, I thought I was through with you Tiger."

"You know this person?" Raine asked.

"Why didn't you lose your memory like the rest?" Tiger asked.

"You must have forgotten to wipe my memory. You can be quite forgetful," Genis said. I seriously don't remember those last set of events happening at all in the game. When I glanced back of to Tiger, he was reading from a laptop.

"Well I guess I did leave that part out. Whoops," he said as he set the laptop down and it vanished.

"So who are you anyway?" I asked.

"My name is Tiger, but you might know me as something else." Okay, this person is weird.

"Were you with that crazy chick?"

"Yes, I am also the one responsible for you coming here." Now he's dead. I turned on my saw and prepared to charge at him.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Genis said. I ignored the warnings and ran at him. Suddenly, I felt a sharp pain in my hands. I looked and saw I was holding the saw blade and it hurt. Remember that saw blades plus skin equal more pain then you would guess. I dropped the weapon, uttered a number of words that the writer does not wish to repeat, and saw blood fall to the ground.

Raine came over and healed the wounds. "How did that happen?" I asked.

"Never attack me or weird things will happen," Tiger said. "Anyway, that lesson won't take more then one time to learn, so I have come to tell you why I brought you here."

"And that is?" I asked. This guy will have his internal organs rearranged if I have my way.

"Well let's see if you can figure it out," he said as a strange cage appeared behind him. He walked away from it and I could see a man made of win was in it. He was unconscious and the bars of the cage appeared to be made of marshmallow. This keeps getting weirder and weirder. "I bet no one realized I kept Chuck in here all this time. I laugh at those people now."

"So what is going on here?" Lloyd asked.

"Well Names has some important things to do. Some of you may also be needed. If you cooperate I will cure Colette for you."

"You know how to cure her?" Raine asked.

"In simplest terms yea," Tiger responded.

"Please help her," Lloyd said.

"I don't know if we can trust him," Genis said. I had to agree with him. After all, some random person promising to cure Colette. I remember in the game nothing came that easy.

"It seems too convenient for him to just come out of no where and promise to help us."

"Well you did the same thing," Raine said.

"So I suppose you want to know what you must do," the stranger said.

"What do you have planned this time?" Genis asked. The mage seemed afraid of Tiger for some reason. Was there something he knew that the rest of us didn't? I didn't remember anything at all like this happening in the game, so how could only Genis know about this person? Maybe once he explained himself, it would make sense.

"A journey that you must go on."

"Any details?" Genis asked.

"Nope for two reasons. One, I find that building suspense is a lot of fun and a lot of people do it so this is my way of getting back at them, and two, I have absolutely no idea myself. Maybe I will get some soon." I'm starting to think I'm not the only one who needs to take a trip to the mental hospital.