My hand trembled. "Jakoutsu, I...I don't know if I can..."
"Yes! You can! Hell, if you don't do it, you know for damn sure I will!"
"No! I'll do it myself..." I gulped. I was mere inches away from it. Jakoutsu tapped his foot impatiently.
"Bitch, just pick it up, put it on your face, and talk to it!"
"...I can't...!" I wailed. Jakoutsu glared at me.
"Kagome, I swear to God, if you don't pick up that phone, I'll kill you."
"How can you?! Isn't your switchblade still in Houjou's leg?!" I cried out.
"There is such a thing as a pawn shop, fool." He withdrew another, shinier blade from his back pocket. "As Lil' Kim once said many a song ago: "Lunatics in the street--gotta keep the heat." (That's from How Many Licks, featuring Sisqo.)
"But it's a cold blade."
"Don't try to divert my attention, Kagome. Call all five of my brothers and break it off with 'em."
"But...but what about Suikoutsu? I mean, he's so fragile--I don't think his heart can take--"
"STOP BEING A PUSSY AND CALL HIM, DAMN YOU!"
"Okay, okay, I'm picking up the phone!" I cried. As I dialed his number, figuring I'd get him over with, I grumbled, "I don't understand why I have to do this crap in the first place..."
"Because, dumbass, if you expect to have any kind of relationship with our favorite hanyou, he needs to rest assured that you won't be running around fucking anybody else."
"But I haven't fucked anybody since the Tobushikai incident. Three weeks ago!" After four rings, when there was no answer, I hung up, slumping in my chair.
"...Whoa, that's a record for you, isn't it?"
"Ugh...you have no idea how hard it's been...I have to resort to an alternative outlet for my overactive sex drive."
"I hope you're not masturb--"
"Don't! Even try me like that! I'll cut off your boy parts." There was silence for a few, during which Jakoutsu stared at me dryly, me fidgeting nervously under his gaze. "...Y'know, never mind that."
"Yeah."
"Hey, where is Inuyasha anyway?"
"If he ain't here, I dunno. I don't keep track of the guy's social life."
"I didn't ask you all that."
"Was I talking to you?"
"You must've been, 'cause there's nobody else here."
"Well, maybe I was talking to myself."
"Yeesh, and I thought I was the crazy one. You been puff, puff, giving again?"
"I been puff, puffing, but not giving..." Jakoutsu smirked, and I laughed. "Alright, now you can call the asshole brother."
"What, Renkoutsu? I don't think you have to worry about him; I haven't fucked him in about three months."
"Cripes."
"So...Bankoutsu next?"
"Yeah. He's a little ass fiend, you know that? I'm surprised he hasn't torn your door off its hinges to get to you."
"He's not stupid, that's why. Now his boy parts I'll cut off!" I grinned as I called his cell.
Out of the five brothers I used to fuck, I could only reach three--Bankoutsu, Kyoukoutsu, and Ginkoutsu. All of them, begging me not to break it off, but frankly, I couldn't bring myself to much care about them anymore. Now, trust and believe, there were still a good five more burdens on my back, but I wasn't particularly worried about them. Kouga was my only real problem, so much so that I postponed my break-off with him for another week or so. A few hours after I'd broken it off with Jakoutsu's brothers, the two of us were watching TV and dipping into some luscious peach ice cream, when the phone rang. Jakoutsu and I looked at each other, carefully put our cartons down on the floor, and made mad dashes to get to the phone. I leaped over the back of the couch; Jakoutsu sped around it. The bastard tripped me up, but I grabbed the back of his ankle and clambered over him. I leaped at the phone, tucking my legs in near me so that Jakoutsu couldn't grab them--not for lack of trying, of course--and right after I snatched up the phone, I hit the kitchen floor.
"Hello?" I groaned.
"Um...Kagome?" It was Suikoutsu, sounding slightly bemused.
"Oh, hi, Sui-kun!" I laughed, holding the phone out of Jakoutsu's reach. "What's up?" I had completely forgotten about my task until he said, "You called me earlier?"
"..." I nearly dropped the phone. "Oh...oh, yeah. Right. Actually, I have something to tell you..."
"Surprisingly, I was going to call you anyway, because I had something to tell you!"
"...Really?"
"Uh-huh!" He sounded very enthusiastic about whatever it was. Maybe he bought me something...? "Kagome...this isn't gonna be easy for me, but...we have to break it off." With the phone's volume on full blast, Jakoutsu had heard every single word he'd uttered. His eyes widened, his mouth agape, and his jaw began to tremble. He clamped his hands over his mouth, his eyes beginning to water. I glared menacingly at him.
"But why, Suikoutsu?!"
"I'm sorry, Kagome, but...I've met someone else." Now wasn't that a bitch!?
"No, but I was gonna break it--"
"I know it's hard for you, Kagome, but..try to sleep tonight, okay?" There was a female voice in the background and I could practically see Suikoutsu grinning ear to ear. Before I could protest and break it off with him first, he continued, "Sorry, Kagome, but that's her! We're going on a date. See you around!" He even hung up before I could! Livid with embarrassment, I slammed the phone back down onto the receiver, and glared at Jakoutsu, daring him to say anything. He bolted back into the living room and collapsed on the couch in fitful guffawing.
"SON-OF-A-BITCH!" I raged, stomping to the couch and shoving Jakoutsu onto the floor, which only provoked more laughter.
"Oh...! Oh-ho-ho-ho...!" Jakoutsu snickered.
"No more of this shall we speak, got it?!" I growled at him.
"Okay. Okay. I'm calm now." He exhaled, face straight, with the exception of a few stray twitches. "So...um..." Jakoutsu smiled, picking up his ice cream and dipping into it. "What exactly is it that you do as an alternate for sex?"
"...Promise not to tell anybody?" Jakoutsu nodded. "Especially not Inuyasha?" Jakoutsu nodded fast. "Swear not to tell?" Jakoutsu nodded faster. "Swear on your family's grave and hope to die with a burnt needle stuck in both your pupils forever?" Jakoutsu nodded so fast, his bangs flopped. I sighed.
"Just get on with it! Damn! We all already know it's masturbating, so just--"
"Actually..." I cut him off, glaring. "...I dance. Happy?" Jakoutsu blinked.
"Seriously?! Get the hell outta here!" he gasped sarcastically. "That is just so major! I don't know how I can keep that secret!"
"Ha-ha."
"Did I laugh? I don't recall it. But really, how big of a secret is that, now? Everybody dances."
"Um...not how I dance." I muttered. He cocked his eyebrow.
"Just exactly how do you dance?"
"In a very...very...very explicitly sexual fashion. I designed it myself. I also found something out about myself."
"Like...? What, did you discover an erogenous zone?"
"That, among others, and...I'm flexible."
"...Flexible? Like how?"
"Um...hold on, lemme show you one of my positions." Jakoutsu had a curious look on his face as I headed to a clear spot on the floor. I stood up stock straight, sighing. I bent my torso backward.
"Okay, what's so bad about--...oh...my...fuck..." Jakoutsu had a rather amusing rictus on his face as I held both my ankles with both my hands, head almost touching the floor, but legs still unbowed. "UUUUUGGGGHHH!!!! That is nasty!" Jakoutsu yelled, scampering up onto the top of the couch.
"Actually, I'm not done yet...hold on..." I rolled so that I was in the same position, but my front torso was on the floor. My breasts were somewhat pained, but I ignored it, and bent my knees to the point where my head was between them. Holding my legs secure, I let my feet touch the ground, and to keep balance, let my hands do the same. Jakoutsu was actually cowering in wonderment, and he winced visibly when I returned my body to its normal stature, a few joints cracking noisily as I did so. I sat back on the couch, calmly and casually eating my ice cream. Jakoutsu cautiously came back to my side, staring at me and nearly missing his mouth as he directed his spoon.
"Um...how in hell...?"
"A lot of practice." I sighed, cracking my neck from side to side.
"Jeez...you should be a stripper. That's more your forte than being unemployed."
"Eh. Too many diseases out there nowadays. STDs, you know." Jakoutsu suddenly broke out into a monkey grin.
"My best friend is a strip-per!" he teased. "She poppin' and rollin', so nasty! And she climbin' that pole, 'cause my best friend is a strip-per!"
"Shut up, Jakoutsu..." I muttered. "Like I said, don't tell anybody that shit, okay?"
"Yeah, yeah...say, what else can you do?"
"I don't think you'd want to see if that grossed you out."
"Just how in the hell do you work that into a dance?"
"...Huh. Y'know, I just thought of that. I'll just call it a yoga position or something. Yoga's actually pretty good for your health. It balances your mental and physical states."
"Shouldn't you be more worried about the mental state?" Jakoutsu snickered. I biffed him in his head.
"Okay, I think we've had enough crazy jokes for today!" I said loudly.
At around three, Jakoutsu left, claiming that he didn't feel like just lounging around the house all day, to which I replied, "Lounging around the house is my profession. I make a living from it." So I was there al by myself, with not a damn thing to do. I considered some yoga, but my legs and boobs still hurt from my previous demonstration. Therefore, the random idea of cleaning up came to me. Lazy though I was, I was also corrupted by boredom, so I gathered up Jakoutsu's and my dirty clothes to do a little washing. I figured that the clothes I was currently wearing could've used some cleansing, too, and tossed those in the machine. I dug up my old DS out of the closet and sat atop the washing machine in a red bra and black panties to play it. Turned out that the vibration from the washer did wonders for horniness, but completely fucked up my game. Hand kept shaking when I tried to move Mario with the little pen. In my frustration at accidentally falling into the stupid spike pit again, I threw down the game, sulking and pouting like a little child. Well...there goes my entertainment for the day. Beautiful... Now I had to buy a new DS in addition to a new cell phone. Life sucked at present.
There came a knock at the door. I cocked an eyebrow, wondering who it could be. Like I said before, no women ever visited me, so I didn't really have to worry about covering up my half-nakedness. It had to have been a guy, so I hopped off of the washing machine and skipped--literally--to the door.
"Yes?" I trilled, then paused. Could I possibly sing? Hmm...It gave me something else to think about later on that month. "Who is it?"
"It's Kouga, dollface." My brain crashed to a screeching halt. ¿Ah, mi Dios. Kouga ..why? ¡Por qué Kouga, para la consideración de Dios?! (Oh, my God...why Kouga? Why Kouga, for God's sake?! In Spanish. I thought I switch it up a bit, hehe.)
"Um...I-I don't have any clothes on!" I called through the door, mentally berating myself for such a stupid excuse. When has that ever stopped me from opening the damn door?! ¡Maldígame y mis maneras de whorish! (Damn me and my whorish ways! Thank God for the Internet.)
"Heh, that never stopped you before." The doorknob twisted and Kouga let himself in. I glared at him, indignant.
"Excuse you! Barging into people's houses like you own something around here!" I chastised, but he didn't seem to be paying me much attention. He was too busy ogling my half-nudity. I anime-sweatdropped, brows furrowed, especially when I noticed his pants get tight. Oh, no, no, hell no! There would be none of that today, no sir! "Are you done rubbernecking me? Because the machine just dinged. Just tell me why you're here so you won't be here anymore." Kouga snapped out of his gaze, leering at me amorously.
"Kagome, don't play coy with me. It's not your nature, y'know." I quirked my eyebrow.
"And you're telling me you know my nature?"
"I've known you long enough to. Why shouldn't I?"
"Because maybe that's not my nature anymore, hmm?"
"Heh! That's funny. C'mon, let's go; my pants are gettin' uncomfy, and I can smell your arousal."
"Whatever the case, it ain't for you, so if that's what you're looking for, an outlet for your hotness, you'd better turn the hell right back out my damn door." He looked surprised, as well he should've been; I'd never said these words to him like this before, especially not so seriously. Then he broke out into a grin.
"Oh, I see--we're playing the hard-to-get game! Hehe, I see you! O-Okay, Kagome, but what if I don't leave?" he stammered playfully. I continued to look at him sternly. "Are you gonna beat me?"
"I'm gonna send your stupid ass out. That's it; Kouga, we're through. I'm sick of all this meaningless sex." His eyes widened and he dropped the stupid act.
"Meaningless? But...I mean, it's not meaningless! I told you, I love you!"
"Yeah, but I don't love you. It's not consentient, and is therefore meaningless to me. One-sided sex is no longer on my mind. Sorry. Uh, you can leave now, and please don't slam my door--thank you very much and goodbye." I turned on my heel and headed back to the laundry room, not bothering to look back at Kouga. Before I could reclaim my spot on the washing machine, too lazy to take out the clothes and put them in the dryer yet, the laundry room door slammed behind me. I whipped around to see Kouga growling angrily.
Yuh-oh. He looks pissed.
She chooses now of all times to give her stupid opinion! ¡Tiempo de sucky de goddamned! (Goddamned sucky timing! Okay, okay, no more from here, I swear! (Snickers))
D'you think you could stop speaking Spanish now?
"How dare you deny your alpha?!"
HER WHAT?!?!?!?!?!
"MY WHAT?!?!?!?!?!" I screamed in outrage.
"You heard me, bitch! You are to obey your alpha!" My fists clenched, but I forced myself to calm down.
"You don't own me, Kouga." I felt a weird sense of deja vu again. "I'm not your mate, and I never will be. If anything...I'll be Inuyasha's mate. That's why I broke it off with you, but you're so fucking dense, you can't see when somebody doesn't want you!" And that's when I noticed Kouga's body begin to enlarge, his torso getting muscular to the point where his shirt ripped off. His feet turned into those of an actual wolf, in animal terms, and his hands became paws. His nose deformed into a snout, and his fangs elongated. Basically...he turned into a huge wolf monster, fur and all. I gulped as my eyes trailed down to the much thicker bulge in his pants. "Umm...did I mention that...you're my alpha? Hehe..." I laughed nervously. "Ow!" I hissed, feeling a sharp pain in my soul.
Don't even play.
"Goddamn it..."
"I shall make you mine, bitch, the traditional way." His fangs gleamed under fluorescent light as he smirked, openmouthed, at me. As he was blocking the door, there was no way out, so I had to make use of what was available to me. I considered the clothes, but really, what good would that do? 'Oh, here's a smart idea, let me throw a pair of panties at him, that'll stop him!'? No. It'd probably turn him on...
"Okay, now...I'm not exactly certain of what the "traditional way" of mating actually entails, but you need to leave." He took a step toward me, and I took one back. My heel hit the washing machine and I found myself sorely wishing I could pick it up and bash Kouga over the head with it...
He ripped off his pants, and to my horror, his erection had torn through the elastic of his underwear and was pointing straight at me. My eye twitched. "I...don't exactly think that that will fit into me."
"I'll make it fit." Kouga snorted, stepping in so close to me that his cock, which I previously found so arousing, but now only scared the hell out of me, was pushing against the fabric of my panties. He grinned open-mouthed at me, his hot breath hitting me dead-on and repulsing me. As a wild wolf, his breath stunk to high heaven! I wanted to cover my nose, but knew that it would expose me to him even more, so just dealt with it. I tried to ease back, but he must've thought that I was grinding against him, because his grin only widened and he tightly put his arms around my smaller-by-comparison frame. He clawed off my panties, one of my favorite pairs, too, and wasted no time in pumping into me mercilessly. Under any other circumstance, I would've enjoyed it, but this time, now that his dick had to have been at least fourteen inches long and three inches thick, it hurt. A lot. Hell, I hadn't been in this much pain during sex since Inuyasha took my virginity! I whimpered, daring not show my pain any other way.
"Seimegami, help me!" I hissed under my breath, heart palpitating.
I can't help you! You're too scared to let me surface! Let go of that fear!
I tried to, but it was hard when you were already getting raped. My luck couldn't suck worse; this was, what, the third time I'd gotten ravished.
As long as he doesn't do it from the back...
Why was that a problem? He'd done it before.
Not when he was attempting to make you his mate!
...Gulp. Only now did I realize that Kouga was a canine. Idiot me...and then something else came to mind.
HE COULD IMPREGNATE ME!!!!
...Yeah...did I forget to mention that?
That was the last straw. No chance or...no...I attempted to fight Kouga off. I pushed him, I punched him, I scratched him--with nails I just realized were weak in comparison to Seimegami's claws--, and I was even about to bite him, when Seimegami stopped me.
That's the last thing you want to do in this situation!
One thing, however, intrigued me when I hit him the hardest, in his shoulder. There seemed to be a kind of static electricity thing going on when my palm made contact. The skin on his shoulder burned him, apparently, and he yelped out in pain. I blinked, wondering what could have caused such a reaction. Kouga growled, much like Kenshi had when I'd screamed in his ear, and dug his claws into my shoulders. I cried out in pain and my heart rate increased, not for the first time today, when even Ias a human could smell blood. Before I could think any further, Kouga spun me around, fisted his hands in my hair, and slammed my head onto the washing machine, effectively bending me over and exposing to him my behind. He pounded into me from behind and this time, I couldn't help but shriek in pain. Saltwater leaked from my eyes, joining blood that I saw on the machine. I was terrified out of my mind at the beast my former swain had become, and...I think I was passing out again. I didn't know what to do anymore. I later felt his breath on my neck, and everything clicked into place--he was a werewolf!
(smacks forehead) No, dummy! He's going to mark you! The traditional youkai way to mate entails biting the chosen mate--in the upper body area!
I groaned out loud, feeling a concussion coming on. I felt even sicker when Kouga licked my neck, growling raspily, "Once I make you mine, Kagome, you'll never fuck another male again. The bond of a mate is unbreakable." I wanted to cry out, "But I don't even want to be your stupid mate!" yet thought better of it. So I simply squeezed my eyes shut, body trembling with dread as I awaited the inevitable chomp to my jugular...
I heard my front door slam open and Kouga growled in obvious annoyance. His fangs vibrated on my neck as he did, and I thanked the Lord for the interruption. The wooden laundry room door was ripped to pieces, and my savior, none other than Inuyasha, stood in the doorway, in all his demonic glory. His now silver-blue hair whipped around him as a blue light shone around him. It was his crackling aura, his fury manifest in the way he glowed.
"Who dares interrupt my mate and I?!?!" Kouga snarled, turning around to bare his fangs at Inuyasha, who remained calm.
"Inuyasha..." I whispered.
Seikami...
Kouga cut a fierce eye onto me, mouth formed into a small O and brows wrinkled. Then he slanted his eyebrows at Inuyasha, knuckles cracking. I took this chance to turn around, maybe retain a semblance of the dignity so viciously usurped from me by Kouga.
"So you're the infamous Inuyasha. Heh. Never thought I'd have the chance to personally rip into you!" Kouga dashed in Inuyasha's direction, but he simply stepped to the side, avoiding Kouga. He silently made his way towards me, dichromatic orbs boring into my own relieved and still scared ones.
"You bleed." Simple words, but enough to melt my heart. "His hands, I presume?" I cast my gaze downward, ashamed.
"Yes..."
"Who is he?"
"..." I was almost too frightened to tell him, for fear of the possibility that he may really think he had no chance with me. But then, he deserved to know... "Kouga." I finally answered. "Inuyasha, I'm sorry; I tried to--"
"Hold on a moment, please." He left the room, facing Kouga, who was about to claw Inuyasha up. "Now is the winter of your discontent."
"Hah?" Kouga said dumbly, lowering his arms.
"You have damaged Kagome. I will not mince words with you, nor repeat myself when I say...I will kill you." Before Kouga could even growl a protest, Inuyasha brandished a greenly fluorescing index claw like a whip. "Dokkasou!" An emerald aura in the form of a scourge emerged from the claw, slashing across Kouga's chest. I was too enthralled by Inuyasha's ability to defend himself so expertly--with Seikami's aid, of course--to be pissed about the wolf blood spilling on my white carpet. Where, with a regular whip, there would normally be a handgrip utilized to maneuver it, Inuyasha's finger served as a makeshift as he mercilessly and smoothly guided his Dokkasou. Soon enough, Kouga was looking, at the risk of sounding redundant, whipped. Horribly. Inuyasha's final whip had him soaring at the door. He grunted as he slid down the door, blood trailing behind him. He was slumped against the door, slashes all over his skin. He was slowly returning back to normal, but losing blood quickly.
"Because it is Kagome's wish I do not kill you, you will remain alive--for the time being. However, if you once more attempt what you attempted today, you will die, whether or not Kagome wishes it. Now leave." Command dripped from the simple command, and despite his many lacerations, Kouga scrambled to his feet and hightailed it out my door, leaving blood in his wake. I stared wide-eyed at Inuyasha, who didn't look like he was transforming back to his hanyou form any time soon, and walked in my direction, gazing at me with cool yet concerned eyes. "Kagome."
"How...oh, man...you totally ripped into Kouga!" I gaped, then wired my jaw shut before I began to sound like a fangirl.
"Come. I will heal your wounds." I blinked. Heal my wounds? How in the hell...? "And then you will explain to me this situation." Ay-yi-yi...I knew I was gonna have some 'splainin' to do...