11.

Dinner had been nice and relaxed and Olivia was less nervous than she had expected to be when they returned to Brian's apartment afterwards. As soon as Brian had taken her coat and put it away, he wrapped his arms around her. She laughed and gave him a peck on the lips.

"Cleared for all activities huh?" she asked.

"Yeah," he sighed. "I think we need to test if the doctors are right."

She grinned and looked into his eyes.

"I'm not sure we can manage all the tests in one go, Bri."

"Just a few will do for now," he rasped as he lifted her up bridal style.

Olivia laughed out loud and wrapped her arms around his neck while he carried her straight to the bedroom.

...

Brian had fallen asleep almost immediately afterwards, and Olivia listened to his regular breathing and his heartbeat. Her head was resting on his shoulder, her arm draped across his waist and one of her legs resting between his. She felt comfortable with him and having sex with him had been very satisfactory. Especially after they had to wait for weeks before they could do anything intimate together. They had been tempted to fumble a bit before, but not too much, because one thing would soon lead to another and not being able to see it through would have been even more frustrating. She had needed some time to get used to Brian anyway and in an ironic twist of fate, his injuries had made sure she hadn't plunged in head first. While she did feel like she didn't have many options anymore, like she had told Elliot, she didn't just want to grab the first available man that came along. But Brian was familiar. They hadn't started from scratch, trying to get to know each other. And while they hadn't seen each other in years, she had felt comfortable with him right away. He was a straightforward, no nonsense kind of man who wouldn't let her walk all over him. And he was passionate too.

She knew Brian would not have wanted to wait this long if he hadn't been shot. His impatience had shown a bit tonight. He couldn't get her clothes off of her fast enough, and when their buttons and zippers hadn't cooperated right away, they had collapsed on the bed laughing. It was refreshing, there were no hidden agendas or ulterior motives. No complications, nothing simmering beneath the surface.

He had let her take the lead then, trusting that her slender fingers would manage better than his big hands. There hadn't been a lot of foreplay and they both hadn't needed it. His body was firm and muscular and his actions without hesitation. She'd never seen anyone put on a condom as fast as Brian. Their combined experience had resulted in a heated burst of passion, leaving them exhausted yet smiling afterwards. Their bodies clicked, just like they had all those years ago. She remembered her latest conversation with Elliot as she drifted off to sleep. Brian was a good man and he cared about her. Even if he wasn't the love of her life, she could certainly do worse.

...

August 2012, Santa Cruz

"Are you sure you even want me there?"

"What is that supposed to mean Elliot?"

Elliot took a deep breath and looked at his wife, who was staring at him after his last remark. She looked nice in her sleeveless light blue evening gown but he really didn't feel like going to the party with her. Eli was sleeping at a friends' house tonight and they were all set, but he found himself still looking for a way out. He felt completely out of place at these parties. It was all doctors and nurses and he had nothing in common with these people at all. Kathy was annoyed that he was trying to back out of it and wasn't even trying to hide it.

"Everyone is bringing their significant other Elliot. I don't want to go alone," Kathy insisted while she put her earrings in and fixed her pink lipstick. Since when was she wearing lipstick?
She called him her significant other, but he felt anything but significant around her new friends and acquaintances. But he would go. Because he was supposed to. For her.

Once they arrived at the house where the party was being held, Kathy looped her arm through his and smiled. He tried to smile as well but he didn't feel like she actually wanted to touch him. He felt like an ornament on her arm and once they were inside, she soon let go of him to greet some people she knew.

"Oh, and this is my husband," he heard her say and he quickly took a step closer to the small group of people.

"Hmmm, really?" the brunette said, taking him in from head to toe and back up. "Kathy hun, you've been hiding him from us all this time?"

Kathy looked at him as if she was seeing him for the first time and he wondered if she was even attracted to him anymore. She was smiling proudly now, and took a hold of his arm again.

"Maybe I have just a little," she admitted, and he knew she was lying through her teeth. Why was he here again?

After exchanging a few obligatory pleasantries with Kathy's 'friends' and grabbing a drink from a tray and downing it, Elliot wandered out into the yard. It was a wonderful, warm night and the sun was only just setting. He had put on a white short-sleeved shirt and black pants and loosened his black tie as he walked further into the garden, which was a lot bigger than he had expected. There was a small pond about halfway with a bench next to it, and he walked over to it. Just as he was considering sitting down, he heard someone walk up to him.

"Good evening. Mr. Stabler right?"

Elliot turned around to look at the older man who was approaching him. He didn't think he'd seen him before.

"Yes, I'm Elliot Stabler. And you are?" he asked, as he extended his hand.

The man shook his hand and looked at him appreciatively.

"A firm handshake. I like that. I'm Jake Bronson. I own this place."

Bronson? Elliot remembered Kathy telling him about Jake Bronson. He was someone high up in the food chain at the biggest hospital in the area. He was throwing this party because of some kind of anniversary.

Elliot nodded at the man, who didn't really look like a big shot in his simple light brown polo shirt, faded jeans and cowboy boots. Just add a cowboy hat and he'd look like a real cowboy, Elliot thought, Bronson's white moustache completing the look perfectly.

"It's a nice place," he told the older man.

"Thank you. You work in health care too?"

Elliot shook his head and when Bronson sat down on the bench, he sat down next to him.

"Nah. I'm a retired cop from New York. I moved here with my wife. She's a doctors' assistant."

"And she dragged you to my party."

It wasn't a question but a statement and Elliot grinned.

"Yeah. Saying no wasn't an option."

"I know how it goes Elliot."

They sat together in comfortable silence for a few minutes and Elliot was glad he had walked out into the yard. He really didn't feel like chatting with people he didn't know about things he knew nothing about.

"So," Bronson suddenly asked him. "You settled in yet? Glad you moved here?"

Somehow, sitting here with this stranger in his backyard while it was getting dark, prompted Elliot to be honest.

"Actually, I'm not. I miss my life back in New York."

"Hm."

Bronson nodded.

"What's in New York?"

Elliot leaned forward, placing his elbows on his thighs and resting his chin on his clasped hands.

"I left four of our kids behind. They're all grown up now," he added by way of explanation. "And my job."

"And?"

Elliot looked at the man's profile, his eyebrows raised. Bronson just looked at the pond in front of them, a small smile playing on his lips. Elliot looked back at the pond as well and replied honestly again.

"Friends."

Bronson nodded slowly.

"Your wife is very happy here."

"You know her?"

"Yes, I know her. She applied for a job at one of my hospitals and I interviewed her in the second round."

Elliot didn't even know Kathy was looking for something else, let alone that she'd had interviews, but he understood now why this man had known his name.

"I see. So, is she getting the job?" he inquired. It felt a bit strange to get this information from this man in stead of his wife but he wanted to know.

"That's not relevant right now Elliot. Besides, she needs to hear that from us, not from you."

"Yeah, you're right."

"Just like she should have told you about her job application."

Elliot looked at the older man again, and he was looking at him now too. Elliot felt as if he was looking straight through him but it didn't make him uncomfortable. He felt like he could tell this man anything. He almost wanted to.

"If Kathy wants that job, I hope she gets it," he said. And he meant it.

"Because you want her to be happy."

Elliot nodded, and looked straight ahead again. Some lights were coming on in the garden, probably triggered by a light sensor, and he looked at the way the trees and the pond were now illuminated.

"Yeah. We got married when we were just kids and she's taken care of others her whole life. It's her turn now."

"And you? Are you happy?"

"No."

He'd given his answer before he realized it and Bronson registered the shock in his eyes. The older man reached out a hand and put it on Elliot's shoulder reassuringly.

"Don't worry Elliot. I won't tell anyone. Just promise me one thing, alright?"

Ellliot sat up straight and looked at Bronson.

"Sir?"

"Do something about it."

Elliot blew out a breath and stared at the lights that were reflected in the pond.

"That's easier said than done."

"No it's not," Bronson said. "You know what you want. You know what's in New York. Do something about it."

With that, he got up and started walking off, leaving Elliot alone with his thoughts. Who was this man and how did he know so much about him? He hadn't even told him what was bothering him but it was as if Bronson already knew. He almost wished he had told the man about Olivia, to hear his thoughts about her. Because that's what was in New York. She was.

Elliot shook his head and got up as well. He should get back inside and play the doting husband. To make Kathy happy.

...

"Jake Bronson? Really?"

Kathy was looking at him in shock, but with a gleeful look in her eyes.

"What did you talk about?"

They were getting ready to go to bed and Elliot was brushing his teeth while Kathy was brushing her long blonde hair behind him. He looked at her in the mirror.

"Oh, nothing. Life," he answered after spitting out some toothpaste. "He's a wise man."

Elliot dried off his face and walked out of the bathroom into the bedroom. Kathy joined him and they got into bed. When they were both in bed, she turned on her side to face him, leaning on one elbow.

"So tell me. What kind of wisdom did Bronson share with you?"

He could tell she was quite excited that he had spoken with this important man, but he wasn't about to tell her about their conversation, nor about all the things that had remained unsaid between them.

"Just some general life stuff," he told her.

"General life stuff? What does that even mean?"

Elliot smiled at his wife. She seemed so alive these days, even now, in the middle of the night after a long evening of partying. He wished he could feel as alive as Kathy. He reached out a hand to touch her face and he could tell she was surprised.

"You know, about love and happiness. The big picture."

He wasn't telling her the whole truth but she nodded as if she understood what he was saying.

"Are you happy Kathy?"

She thought about it for a moment and then nodded again.

"I do believe I am El."

"Good."

He reached out and wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her on top of him. She yelped in surprise but laughed when he settled her between his legs.

"I want you to be happy Kathy," he told her honestly.

"I want you to be happy too Elliot."

Kathy leaned in and kissed him. They hadn't been intimate in weeks and Elliot just needed some kind of release. To feel something. Anything other than the pain that was gradually growing inside his heart. He kissed his wife passionately and their bodies started to respond. Kathy moaned and Elliot closed his eyes, trying to think back to a time when everything was still simple. When they were seventeen and in love and nothing else mattered. He turned them around so he was on top and started to move his hands under Kathy's nightgown. She helped him take it off and when she pressed her naked upper body into his, he buried his face in her hair. He needed her right now to fill the void. As they made love, he tried desperately to keep out the other thoughts that were bubbling to the surface. He couldn't keep them all out and he literally had to bite his tongue to keep himself from saying her name when he came.

Liv.

...

A/N: Hey, Elliot needs some from time to time as well. And they are married after all. Let me know what you think of how this story is progressing. Are we getting impatient yet, E/O shippers? ;)