Damned
Sorry it's taken me so long.... I've had to sit down for three hours straight to get this out.
Over the few weeks leading to the start of term Tonks drifted in and out of a heavy sleep mumbling for Sirius and Remus on odd occasions. Sometimes she would even call out for Andromeda.
Now it came to the morning before Harry and the other were to return to Hogwarts minus a Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, Remus awoke his head resting on Tonks' bed like he had done for the last few weeks to find it empty.
She was awake.
He heard laughter and cheering downstairs. After raising himself from his chair and stretching all the kinks from his aching muscles he made he way down the stairs. No-one was in the living room but the backdoor was open. He continued to go back down to the kitchen-
The backdoor was open? Ivy had overgrown and blocked the door closed years ago. Remus doubled back and headed into the overgrown garden. Ginny was helping Hermione and Ron to clean up the algae infected pond. Fred and George were making a meal of cutting the grass with charmed Grass Imps. Bill and Charlie were conjuring a marque and Molly and Arthur were setting the table.
"Remus. You're up! We're having a party!" Hermione smiled, the first person to notice the unkempt man. His moustache had now formed a beard over his face. It did nothing but age him. "Perhaps we could borrow your music. I'm sure Tonks likes it."
"It's about time we had something to celebrate." Arthur joined Remus in the doorway. "Nobody was in any mood to celebrate Harry's birthday."
"Were are they both?" Remus asked. "I want to speak to Tonks."
"They went to Diagon Ally. Tonks said she needed new robes and she wanted to buy Harry a birthday present." Arthur explained. "Then Tonks is going to take him to a Muggle church to light a candle for Sirius... I'm unfamiliar with the concept. Do you know anything about it Remus?"
"Hum- Of yes. Only a little. It's a Christian tradition that you light a candle as a sort of everlasting light. It a representation that the loved one will never be forgotten. Tonks took me once... Well I had to take her, she was in her last year. When her mother died." Remus wasn't aware that he was still talking. "A broken heart."
"Because of Sirius?" Arthur brought Remus back to reality.
"In a way." Remus sighed "Tonks was so adamant that Sirius was innocent that nothing her mother could say could convince her otherwise... Andromeda said it was either her or Sirius. Tonks picked Sirius. If he was to be alone, she would be too. I don't think he ever appreciated what she had done for him. If he did, he wouldn't have gone to the DoM that night." Remus thought carefully about what he was about to say. "He had replaced Tonks the moment he escaped from Azakaban. Harry replaced Tonks."
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
The curtain was pulled open and out stepped a washed out Tonks wearing black formal robes.
"They're not you Tonks!" Harry informed her as she twirled. "You look like the Mistress of Snape." Tonks placed her hands on her hips and glared. "Come on Tonks. You'll look like every single teacher in the school. Just dress as yourself."
"And what happens when some girls in your class start idolising me and copies. They did not approve of my style when I was a student. I doubt very much they like it if they have a dozen or so clones running around the school." Harry's mind instantly picked out Lavender Brown and her best friend. Tonks looked at herself in the mirror. "But you are right. This just isn't me. damn, if only I hadn't left it so late."
"It's not as if you could help it Tonks." Harry grumbled. He hated Remus for what he had done to Tonks.
"Don't be angry at him." Tonks bent down to talk to the sitting Harry. She brushed the hair away from his scar motherly. "Things happen for a reason Harry. This was someones doing, not Remus'"
"Still. Sirius was right though. He was dangerous for you, it was only a matter of time before-"
"-Hang on one minute. What did Sirius say to you?" Tonks gripped Harry's hands when he tried to look away. "What?"
"He said, if anything was to happen to him I was to make sure nothing ever happened between you two." He felt himself burning up. "He said he was glad you weren't biting each others heads off... But I couldn't let it go beyond friendship, he would rather see you with Snape."
"That insufferable git!" Tonks paced the robe shop.
"I know. Snape's a git-"
"Not Snape, Sirius. Even in death he'd be jealous!" Tonks fumed picking sets of lavender, pink, red and green robes that were more her style. Harry personally thought they had caught her eye the moment she had walked in the shop but she was trying to be conservative. Without trying them on she handed them to the shop girl "I'll take these. I'll be back Harry, I just need to get changed."
Moments later she reappeared and paid for the robes and left the shop. She then headed into Florish and Blotts and straight up to the counter.
"Miss Tonks." The sheepish blonde man greeted cheerily.
"Hello." She handed four inches of parchment with a list of books to the man. "Can I have twenty copies of each book owled to Hogwarts by tomorrow."
"Right away Miss Tonks." He blushed slightly as she waved goodbye. On her way out the shop she tripped on the step landing face down on the cobbles of the street.
"How the mighty have fallen." A drawling voice cooed to Tonks. All she saw was a black cane. She reckonised the cane.
"I don't ever recall you thinking me mighty, Lucius!" She aloud herself to be picked up by Harry. However, Lucius pinned her to the wall of Florish and Blotts with his cane. "How did you slime your way out of Azakaban?" She knew it was fruitless. She would not get an answer. He instead poked her harder with his cane. No passer-by looked. They all averted their eyes to the Great Lucius Malfoy.
"Potter!" Draco interrupted as Harry made a second attempt to rescue Tonks from the cobbled floor.
"You touch him; You'll wish you weren't going back to school." Tonks threatened.
"And why would that be Nymphadora?" Lucius hissed.
"You're looking at the new Defence Against the Dark Arts-" Tonks informed with pride, until Lucius cut her off.
"Not if the rumours are true." Tonks' blood ran cold. How could he know? The only people who knew were members of the Order. She looked blankly at Lucius. It only infuriated him more "You've been bitten by that half-breed lover of yours-" Tonks had enough. Enraged she grabbed the black cane and spun Lucius round so his back was against the wall, the cane pinning him embedding itself in the fabrics that gathered at his stomach. "You have the strength of a cursed creature Nymph."
"Whether I am cursed or not is not your concern. Nor the status of my relationship with any cursed creature that could have bitten me." Tonks stood as close to him as she could bare. "You have no power in that school anymore."
"I'm still a parent of a child in that school." Lucius whispered. "You put him in danger-"
"If you fear for his safety. Transfer him to another school. Those students have not had a stable teacher in that school for many years now. I intend to stay. Now a jumped up pure-blood wizard like you isn't going to stop me." She walked away.
"But what about all the other parents. They won't want them taught by a werewolf; they didn't last time." Lucius shouted after her.
"Lucky I'm not a werewolf then!" She shouted back without turning back. She smiled knowing that Lucius' sickly smile was fading in the fleeting moments.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
"Lucius is free!" Tonks informed the moment she walked in, before anyone could utter "Surprise". "And he knows I was bitten." Harry followed her into Grimmauld Place laden with bags. Arthur was the first person she met. "Did you know he was free."
"Yes. I did Tonks. It came up in an Order meeting three nights ago. He's been cleared of all charges. He had evidence to prove he wasn't there as a Death Eater and the court lapped it up." Arthur hugged the woman tightly so she dropped her bags. "Lets not think about it now. We have arranged a party in yours and Harry's honour. In the garden. We opened up the back garden." He ushered them both outside were everyone sat under the marquee. Even Severus Snape was there. Looking entirely out of place. There were two empty seats. One between Severus and Remus and another between Ron and Ginny.
"Looks like we are getting divided Harry. Sorry we didn't get to go to the church. I really didn't feel like leaving Dia-"
"Somehow, I doubt it would have done any good Tonks. I prefer not to think about him. If I think to long...." He couldn't find the words to explain to Tonks how he crawled up into a ball and cried like a baby whenever his thoughts wandered to where Sirius was now.
"It's ok Harry. People deal differently." Tonks knew though that he wasn't dealing, he was bottling it up. "Go to your friends. Have a good rest because I'm going to work you so hard-"
"Gotcha!" Harry couldn't get to his friends fast enough. Leaving Tonks to amble along to Severus and Remus. It was Severus who pulled out her chair.
"Thank you." Tonks nodded in his direction.
"How are you feeling after your first day on your feet." Severus questioned as he poured Goblin Ale.
"Tiring!" She put up her feet on the edge of the chair and rested her chin upon her knees. "And informative."
"In what way?" Severus inquired. Tonks, forgetting herself went to answer honestly, that she still thought that there was a spy in the mists. Then she remembered who he was. Severus Snape, the ex-death eater. The only ex-death eater at the table.
"I found a new book." Tonks lied. "A book I've been looking for a while. I thought it was by a muggle. It turns out it was by a wizard- Remus" She turned her head looking for a way out. "-Do you remember the writer of The Crucible?"
"Arthur Miller, yes" Remus' attention remained focused directly on his dinner.
"He's a wizard. Did you know that?" She did, herself know he was a wizard and it had long been there code to get the other out of a dire conversation.
"Yes. I did." He answered flatly turning to Arthur to continue his conversation about drills and other equipment used for D.I.Y. Tonks burned. What had she done to deserve such a frosty response. It wasn't as if it was she who had bitten him.
After watching Harry cut his large birthday cake and show off his Quidditch kit that Tonks had bought him. Remus made his excuses and left the party.
He was halfway up the second set of stairs when he felt the presence of someone else behind him.
"Go away Tonks!" He sighed. He could feel that she was angry and that she would not leave. She caught up to him instantly. His eyes dropped to the floor. "What?"
"Why won't you look to me?" Tonks questioned, her hand raising to his cheek. He flinched.
"Because I'm too blind to see!" Remus answered bitterly. She recognised the words.
"Why won't you look at me?!" Tonks would not accept the answer.
"BECAUSE I'M AFRAID TO BREATH!" Remus shouted. Their song. The lyrics from their song! She understood. He didn't want her to forgive him for biting her. The trouble was, she never needed to forgive him. "What do you want from me?"
"All than I can stand!" Tonks smirked. "Smart arse! Your smart arse! This has nothing to do with Sirius! You haven't disappointed him." She raised his head and in doing so raised his heart. "Look at me and be free. Soon you'll be cured Remus." She held his hand. "Can we talk?" He nodded. Escorting her to his room.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
"You're betting your apprenticeship on me?" Remus questioned once Tonks had explained that for her to be apprenticed by Alexander next summer she was to investigate the cure for werewolves.
"But, I don't have to cure you. I just have to make progress. He informed me that Severus began years ago and Alexander would like me to take off were he left off!" The were both sat upon his bed. Tonks was kneeling in front of the spread out Remus. They had slipped into an old routine without realising.
"Severus? Yea, I know. He told me. Doesn't sound like him though. Working on a cure for my kind?"
"I was thinking the same! Remus, do you think he can be trusted?" Tonks hands fidgeted. Trying to resist the temptation to place them on his chest.
"What makes you say that?" Remus sat up and looked at Tonks. He knew what she was thinking. "Lighting striking twice?" She nodded. If he could turn once. What's to say he wouldn't again.
"It was just... I thought it might have been Peter who had enchanted the ceiling. But, he couldn't have done it alone. Perhaps Severus helped him?!" Tonks suggested.
"Tonks. Why would he make the effort to get you bitten, to cure you?" Remus reasoned with her, knowing himself that it was entirely possible.
"But could Peter do it alone?" Tonks sat back beside Remus. "I know it's him Remus!"
"Me too." Remus placed a hand around Tonks. "So when do I start to be your lad rat?"
"You'll do it?"
"For you! I'd do anything!"
"Anything?" Tonks giggled.
"What you after?" He raised an eyebrow.
"Dress up in one of my new robes and go down stairs and read "I'd like to be a teabag" to everybody!" Tonks was hit by a flying pillow.