Hey guys, I'm back with a new chapter! This one's a lot shorter than the usual because I had to write on someone else's laptop and I didn't indulge myself, so to speak. And I'm quite busy too but the following chaps will be longer. Anyhoo, thanks to Bre, Oola, Olivia and OMG for their wonderful reviews and encouragement (it really helps!) and to everyone who reviewed and read the story, you guys make the story go on! Thanks for the wonderful support!

Rows of boys and girls

Line up to see the world
Candy coated promise
Just out of reach when you want it

Give me something sweet
Bring me to the brink
I'll leave without hesitation
To a world without limitation
Rock me patient, slowly

Don't say you're not amazed when you know you are
And don't say you're not afraid when you know you are
You know you are

Mandy Moore-Merrimack river

Chapter 11: Jealous? (an interlude)

I was woken up early in the morning by a fresh and cheerful Victoria. It's like she hadn't even attended the party to begin with. I carefully kept part of my face hidden in my pillow, because I wasn't sure I wanted her to see my bruises. I wouldn't know how to explain how I came by them. I didn't want her to worry for me; besides, I would spoil her mood completely. I was hoping to have some good news after all that mess.

'So there I was, sitting by myself, bored out of my mind because everyone was so dull and uninteresting, and the drinks were also all sour and I specifically asked the house-elf for some juice but he gave me some sort of beer instead...'

'Vicky!'

'Oh, yes! Sorry! So there I was, when all of a sudden, I see Black walking towards the beverage stand. He was looking at me in an odd way. For a moment I thought I had something on my face so I tried to find a mirror, but he was still looking at me and he seemed he wanted to talk to me so I approached him, though I was quite mortified, you can imagine and I said hello. And guess what? We actually talked! And not only that, but after half an hour he proposed we danced since we were in the way of many couples and some of those people were glaring at us. Well, I almost fainted when he asked me! Of course we were both terrible at it and we stopped after five minutes, but still, Black actually asked me to dance! True, he was very shy about it and after our attempt he politely excused himself, but he said he wanted to continue our discussion! What a night!'

I smiled slyly from under my pillow. Well, I tried to crack a smile. I felt like one of those plump cherubs throwing darts of love everywhere. If only.

Those cherubs don't wear bruises. And they are not hated for what they are. Love is never loathed, though it is the biggest cause of sufferance. Only Muggleborns are loathed because they didn't pick their parents right.
Try as I might, I couldn't stop feeling bad. I wanted to be happy for Vicky, but at the same time, reality obliged me to take a hard look at those around me. There were people like Vicky, who deep down, were kind and gentle but they were raised in an environment that didn't encourage that sort of depth. There were people like Black, innocent wizards that were victims of stronger minds. They were bound by the power of others.

And then there were people like Greta Goyle, who only relished in hurting everyone else, slighting them, making them feel like dirt. I supposed deep down she hated herself and she didn't want anyone to know that so she hated everyone else. Ron would say by now:

'Oh, come off it Hermione! She's just a crazy bint, don't try to excuse her!'

And maybe he'd be right. Oh, how I miss Ron! The boys wouldn't have let this happen to me. I wouldn't have let this happen to me. But it did. Just like getting hit to the ground when you're flying and you feel strong. Suddenly brute force is all it takes. And the fall just angers me. Like any fall.

'I'm glad you had a lovely evening,' I mumbled trying to sound at least a little bit cheerful.

'It was really wonderful. How did you fare?'

'Not so good...I got bored and left early. People weren't being very nice and I can't say I was enjoying the crowd either,' I told her.
'Oh, yes, I noticed you left early. Dorcas came to tell me he had been looking for you everywhere but couldn't find you. I saw you dancing with him.'
'Myes, but I ran away quickly after the dance was over,' I mentioned.
'Oh, I see. Poor chap, he didn't know he was rejected. But I think he likes you.'
'What?'

'Dorcas, he fancies you. I mean why else would he search for you so persistently? He told me you are very pretty. He said he had noticed you before, at the Prefect Rounds. He mentioned you were kind enough not to tell on his sister who was snogging some boy in the Astronomy Tower. He kept saying you were very nice.'
'Oh, well, he shouldn't like me. I'm not interested.'

'You might rethink that when you see his house. It's like a chateau.'
'I don't really care all that much. I'm done with all these men,'I said bitterly, shivering as I remembered Malfoy touching me. I really didn't like any man right now, save for my dad maybe.
'How very feminist of you,' she said smiling.

We chatted some more after which Victoria went to bed, luckily without noticing my bruises. She was so happy, she didn't pay attention to that, her head was in the clouds. I was grateful for that. I was grateful for those concealing charms as well. Magic helped me heal, but why didn't I use it to fight?

My pain was assuaged for a while. I had something to think about and I had a lot of work. Exams were approacing. And I wanted to ace them all. Not just because I wanted to study, but I wanted to show the Slytherins that blood will never stop me. Nor will their horrible attempts to quiet me. Yes, the pain inside of me did threaten to take over me, but I had so much work to do that sometimes I even forgot I was in Slytherin. There were rare moments when I felt I was in my old common room and I would look up, trying to find a friendly face and I'd meet the eyes of some cold witch that would be reading Teen Witch, asking me 'What?' in a very offended tone. Sometimes I'd draw close to the fire and I'd see Harry sitting next to me, reading and I would extend my hand to touch his but I would only touch cold marble. And it was like that every day.

Christmas was also approaching. I had never spent Christmas alone, without my family and friends. I realised that this year, it would all be very depressing. Vicky, Bridget, Catherine and Lucille would be going back home for the holiday. None of them would invite me to come because their parents would never allow it. Everyone in school would be gone and I would be left alone, without exams to worry about, without any sort of company, without and laughs, without any Weasley pranks, without any presents. I would have to sit around and look at the snow falling outside.

As December approached faster and faster, I became aware of a couple of important things. First, I was in the middle of the Second World War. The muggle world was at great peril. All throughout the world people were suffering from hunger, cold or any damage brought by a devastating war. I read all the newspapers I could find but precious little information was given in them. All of a sudden I felt very selfish. All this time I had worried about trivial things, like Riddle's mind games, when the entire world was at war. I knew from the start these were desperate times, I had just tried to ignore this for as long as I could.

One of the Ravenclaw Prefects told me he had a cousin living in Holland and all his Jewish friends had been deported to unknown places. Of course, I knew about those horrid, monstrous concentration camps. My heart squirmed in my chest because I was here, in this time, and I didn't know what I could do to help. I knew the war would eventually end, but couldn't I try to prevent all those deaths?

A lot of Gryffindors were also worried about the war, especially the Muggleborn ones. Mary Finnegan told me the situation in Ireland was very difficult. A lot of leprechauns had died and a lot of fairies had vanished because of the muggle war. She also told me that even some wizards were almost hurt, but they managed to escape. She didn't know the gravity of the situation. It was much worse than that. People died every minute.

David Potter told me his father had sent food and amunition to the muggles through the Prime Minister. I was glad to hear some wizards were attempting to help. What could I do?

The second thing I became aware of was that the weather was very odd. It was a lot warmer than usual. Our Care for Magical Creatures professor told us that some giants had started migrating to other mountains because the snow had started to melt. It was was more like a breezy spring than the beginning of winter.

I wanted to remain calm, but I admit, I was anxious and scared. And my sobriety only took me this far. Soon I was drunk with worries. Usually, worrying is my favourite sport, now it was something similar to homework.

Despite all this, a lot of children here were happy for the arrival of Christmas. It was better to be happy than defeated and miserable. That never helped.
I took my exams towards the end of December with a heavy heart. I would find out the results in January and until then I was left to worry some more.
I watched everyone pack their luggage around me and I saw the smiles on their faces, the 'I'm going home' smile. I wouldn't be experiencing that soon. A smile like that was forbidden for me.

On December 23, however, I woke up with a small smile on my face. All those nasty Slytherin idiots had left, including Goyle, Nott, Avery, Malfoy and so forth. I was called in the Headmaster's office. I was surprised to see Dumbledore there, waiting for me with an expectant smile on his face. He was bearing good news. Dippet himself was immersed in some papers so he let his colleague speak for him.

'Miss Greystone, I have talked to Headmaster Dippet about your situation at school here and we both agreed you should enjoy Christmas in a real home, not at school. Due to your excellent results, we think you deserve to spend Christmas at home, this year. What do you think?'

'But, Sir,' I said shyly, 'I have no home to speak of.'

'Well, home is a general word that can have many meanings. One of those meanings is my home. Would you like to spend Christmas with me?'

I was dumbfounded. Dumbledore, asking me to spend Christmas with him? I felt like Minerva McGonagall in her thirties. I didn't know what to say. I was too shocked. Not even Harry had seen Dumbledore's home. I would be the first? Was I really that special?

'I guess that would be nice,' I replied after he coughed, demanding an answer. 'But I wouldn't like to trouble you, Sir.'

'Oh, no, it's a pleasure to have such a bright student in my home.'

And just like that, I was going to spend Christmas with none other than Dumbledore. The prospect seemed unfathomable.

Later that evening I had Prefect Rounds.

What with all this turmoil inside my heart and around the world, I had no time for Riddle. I didn't stop to think too much of him, but I did. Who wouldn't really? He was that constant reminder that I was going bonkers, that constant bugger, the fly in my Chardonnay. He was also once again unreadable. I couldn't decipher his intentions at all. After him having prevented those Slytherins from beating me up like dogs, I had tried to be a little nicer to him, because my conscience told me so, but in two weeks or less, my annoyance returned. He had once again turned evasive and odd and ridiculously nonchalant. I think all the cold of winter was absorbed by his being, that's why it was so warm outside. I didn't care about it, as long as he didn't bother me.

But tonight I was unusually excited because of the new change in plans with me and Dumbledore. I think he noticed it because he kept mocking me about it.

'Something big happened in your life, Greystone? You discovered how to use your wand?'

'And you probably discovered humour tonight,' I replied. 'No, I'm just happy. Can't I be?'

'But there must be a reason for your happiness.'

'Wouldn't you like to know...'

'Curiosity didn't kill the cat,' he said dryly.

'Oh, aren't you clever? Sadly, it does not work that way.'

I hadn't noticed I had let my guard down and I instantly felt him getting inside my head and my scar tingled. I raised my shields but it was too late. He was very fast and smooth. I had a strange deja vu. I felt like Harry when Voldemort entered his thoughts. Only I couldn't really enter Riddle's, like Harry did.

'Stop it!' I yelled shaking my head. 'You have absolutely no right to do that.'

'Says in what book of laws, Greystone?' he asked indifferent.

'How about moral ones?!'

'Oh, that. The stupidest thing man ever created. The most boring too. So, Dumbledore, eh? He invited you? He never invites anyone to his home.'

I could feel a tinge of envy in his reply. Good, let him suffer. He wanted to be close to Dumbledore because he sensed his great powers. Unfortunately, he wasn't stupid. Now, I seemed like the teacher's pet.

'Jealous?' I countered.

'Yes,' he replied, boring his eyes into mine.

'Well, maybe next year you'll have a better chance. Bring some sweets on a silver tray to get in his good graces. Make it lemon sherbet,' I replied acidly.

'Seems like you don't hold him in high esteem.'

'No, it's not like that at all,' I told him. He had put words in my mouth once again! 'You always have to have some smart line, don't you?'

'I just drew the reasonable conclusion. You seem very wary of him. You avoid him and do not want to be in his presence. Hmmm, you might be right. It might be something else. Would you care to tell me?'

I turned as white as a sheet. How on Earth did he know all this? Was it that obvious? Was he watching me in particular? Was he in my head again?

You just never knew.

'And spoil the surprise? Never,' I countered turning away from him.

He was about to say something when suddenly, I saw someone approaching us. It was Dorcas. He was earing his shiny badge at his waist. I almost felt like giggling.

'Evening lads, hello Jane, how is the night progressing?' he asked us. For once, Riddle and I had the same expression. Slightly confused.

'Any catches?' he repeated.

'Oh, no, not really. Everything is quiet,' I told him.

'Too bad, I would've wanted some entertainment tonight,' he said nonchalantly. I noticed he was trying to seem cool and composed, but he wasn't very good at it. His hands kept flying about his body like he was ready to take off.

'Glad to run into you, Jane, I wanted to ask you what your holiday plans are. I didn't get to ask you.'

'Oh, I think I'm staying in the castle,' I replied, hoping Riddle wouldn't ruin it for me. He remained surprisingly quiet.

'In the castle?! How is that possible?'

'Well, Hogwarts is a lovely home so I won't be feeling lonely. And I quite like it here.'

'Oh, but had I known I could have stayed too, to keep you company because Christmas in my family is quite dull.'

Bollocks, he did fancy me.

'Goodness, don't trouble yourself! It's nothing. Go spend time with your family. They're much more important, especially now,' I said.

'Well, you're special too, Jane. Um, when I return, we should go have a drink together, maybe get to know each other, since we're working together.'

Was Riddle glaring at Dorcas? No, just my imagination.

'Yes, I should get to know the Head Boy,' I joked.

'So then, it's a date Jane...'

'For the love of Merlin,' Riddle suddenly muttered. We both turned to him surprised.

'You want to say something Riddle?' Dorcas asked a bit offended.

'Actually, Dorcas, I do. First off, stop calling her Jane like it's your grandmother's chocolate pudding that you fantasize about in the middle of the night. Second, try hitting yourself with a book on subtlety on the head, maybe then you'll get somewhere. Third, you two don't work together. You were given a pathetic position in order to quiet down your ridiculously stupid and rich father.'

I think my mouth fell to the floor.

Dorcas' wasn't doing a good job either.

Riddle had said all those things in such a serene way, you'd think by his tone he was trying to give him advice.

Dorcas tried opening his mouth, but he looked like a fish trying to breathe on land. I pitied him. But I was shamefully relieved.

'Do you have something to add?' Riddle asked, daring him to speak.

Dorcas made to take out his wand but Riddle was already holding his. He saw he was glaring at him menacingly so he stepped back and shook his head confused.

'I...you...no.'

'I didn't think so. Well, then, let's not waste anymore of our time. Merry Christmas and goodbye,' he said and Dorcas shuffled slowly away, like a prisoner sent back to his cell.

When he was out of range, Riddle turned to me.

'You're welcome.'

'You know, I didn't ask you to fend for me. I actually like that boy,' I lied. 'What was that all about?'

'You don't like him. And I can't stand idiots like him,' he replied simply.

'Idiots like him?'

'Yes. Their sole purpose in life is to demonstrate how idiotic they really are.'

'So then... I'm not an idiot?' I asked, curious to know in which neat category he'd place me.

'No, but you're quite good at it.'

'Ugh, I knew it. You just can't admit that Muggleborns can be intelligent. You can't admit that they are equal to everyone.'

'No, I just don't admit you being my equal. Because there's no such thing, Jane.'

'Some day, you'll be proven wrong,' I told him folding my hands. 'And then you'll swallow your words.'

'I'll make sure that day never comes,' he said smoothly.

'And if it does, notwithstanding?' I asked upset.

'Let's hope for your sake, it doesn't,' he replied. He turned away and walked past me, his chest almost hitting mine.

As he walked away I realised I hadn't asked him about his Christmas plans.