Medical ninjutsu was far more difficult to learn than Sakura had expected. She was always told she was so smart, practically a genius when it came to memorization and chakra control, but that only got one so far when confronted with the sheer volume of information needed to save someone's life. There was a certain amount of chakra to distribute for every type of injury, and to do that on the fly one had to be able to recognize certain signs, especially if operating on internal organs. A man's liver needed to be operated on differently than a woman's, or a boy's, and it depended on how damaged the liver was, too. To send chakra into the body and use its movements and rate of absorption to determine how much would be needed was no easy task to learn. Send chakra into an organ too quickly and it will be destroyed. Send it too slowly and the person may already be dead before the operation is completed.

Tsunade leaned over Sakura's desk. "Ah, very good, my cute little student. Your notes are perfect. Though, I think you should focus more on..."

So big! Sakura thought. She glanced down at her own chest and felt her face contort. I wonder if Sasuke wants...no, why am I still thinking of him?

Cause that is too confusing.

"Thanks, Lady Tsunade," Sakura said as the Hokage went back to work. Sakura turned to her notes and books, but they didn't have the answers she wanted.

Hinata. You gentle fool.

Sakura hadn't seen Hinata since they kissed a month ago. Being apprentice to Lady Tsunade was time consuming, and Sakura studied in her free time. She wasn't ignoring Hinata, but she certainty wasn't going out of her way to see her, either. Part of her was glad she didn't have time for Hinata, but another part felt bad and wanted to see her friend.

It was such a mess. Why had she kissed her?

"I love you, Sakura. I don't care if it hurts. I just want to be near you."

She did say that.

But still.

Was it the right choice? Hinata was very introverted and often lacked self-confidence. Sakura wanted to believe in her friend's strength, but had she hurt Hinata?

It's no use. Why am I even trying? All I'm good for is figuring out the angles and speeds needed to throw a proper kunai.

Sakura flopped onto her desk and watched a songbird land on a tree branch.

That window needs cleaning.

A creaking sound snapped Sakura back up. She turned to see Ino walking in with papers under an arm.

"Hey, Sakura," she said while walking to the Hokage.

"Hi, Ino," Sakura said.

"Here's the reports you asked for, Hokage-sama. My father said everything is going well." Ino handed the papers to Tsunade.

"Thank you, Ino, and tell your father for me," Tsunade said.

Ino made her way over to Sakura. "What's up?" she asked as she pulled a chair up to Sakura's desk.

"Oh, not much, Ino," Sakura said. She sighed.

Ino raised a brow. "Something wrong?"

"Eh..."

"Oh, c'mon, Sakura. You obviously want to talk about it."

"Well, you see, there's this...boy."

"Boy troubles! How wonderful. So?"

"C'mon, keep it down. Anyway, he...told me he loves me. And I don't really know how I feel."

"No way."

"Yeah. We even kissed."

Ino looked shocked. "You...you had your first kiss?"

"Could you be a little more surprised? I don't think you're quite jealous enough."

"I'm not jealous!"

"Whatever. Anyways, it's no big deal."

"No big deal? You have someone who likes you so much they'll kiss you!"

"I guess. I mean, it was really nice. And all the build up...and...and you want to do it again, but you're so scared. And everything does change. But I think the kiss itself isn't so important. It's just a thing."

"Sounds like a really nice thing," Ino said. "I want to kiss someone. How about it?" She grinned.

"Shut up, Ino, c'mon."

"Oh, don't be such a prude. I'm only teasing. Why are you so red?"

Because I kissed a girl, you jerk.

"So, what's the problem? You must like him, right?"

"Ino, he said he loves me."

"So? Isn't that what you've always wanted? If Sas... Eh. Sorry. It can't be Sasuke. Right?"

"No."

"Who is it?"

"Not telling."

"Alright. Well, c'mon, what's the problem?"

"What do you think love is, Ino?"

"Sakura?"

"Seriously. What is it? Is it just a feeling?"

"I-I guess. Right?"

"I care deeply for this person. I don't want anything bad to happen to her, but is that enough to be called love when you're talking about a...a romantic relationship?"

"Her?"

Shit. Did I just...? Shit. Shit. Shit. SHIT.

Sakura laughed. "Him. I guess I'm just really anxious, and you said...and, yeah. I meant him. "

"Alright, Sakura," Ino said, but her expression was one of confusion, maybe disbelief. "I guess I can see what you're saying, but if you let him kiss you, you must think he's attractive, right? And you said you care about him. So, what's the damn problem?"

"He's cute, I guess."

"Then I really don't see the problem. Is he not cool?"

I definitely don't think most people would call Hinata "cool."

"A loser?" Ino's face shifted into mock horror. "Is it Naruto?"

"No, Ino, it's not Naruto. Stop trying to guess." Well, at least Naruto's a boy.

"Oh, but it's so not fair, Sakura! You've got a boy in love with you, and you won't even tell me who!"

Sakura sighed. "Look, even if I think he's cute and care about him, if we get serious, I think I'll just end up hurting him."

"Sakura. Love is love. You can either hurt him now, or you can take a chance and maybe hurt him later."

"It's not that easy."

"But it is! That's all there is! Do you think he'd rather you don't out of some fear for his safety? I get that maybe you think he's come off too strong, but why even do this to yourself? You've got a real chance here!"

She's right. Why does she have to be right? This would be so much easier if I could just tell her it's a girl. But there's no way. I'm not even sure I want to be with a girl. It has to be a boy, otherwise she might figure it out. I can't do that to Hinata.

Sakura sighed and shrank in her chair. "I guess you're right, Ino."