Kiba's answering machine:

Yo, this is Kiba 'woof' and Akamaru. You're ringing because you love us,
mainly me but I don't blame you. We're not here but leave your message on
how great we are after the beep 'beep'

#1: We know your secret!

#2: Kiba, think straight. Akamaru couldn't possibly turn into lego. Next
you'll think there's a place called legoland or something like that. Calm
down and apoligize to Ino.

#3: Hey Kiba this is Ino and guess what. There is a place called legoland!
And Akamaru is dead! HAHAHAHA!

#4: If you don't steal plants from the Yamanaka's and leave them by the
village gates I'll tell all of Konoha your secret!

#5: This is the Nekoraru clan of made-up filler village 10! We want to kill
you! Why? We don't need a reason because we are filler people!

#6: This is Shino leaving a message on how irresponsible you are! You
should be more like me. I treat all my bugs with respect and make sure they
don't get kidnapped! So... GASP! I TROD ON SAMUEL! ARGH! I STUMBLE ROUND IN BLIND DITRESS! NOOOOOO I SMOOSHED MY CLOSEST FRIENDS! TIMOTHY! ELIZA! EMANUEL! JACK! FRED! JOEY! CATHERINE! LOUISE! FRANCIS! WAAAAAAAHHHHHH! "achem" because i'm in a bad mood, next time I see you I'm going to smack you with a newspaper on the nose!.

#7: I recieved the flowers, now bring me Shikamaru's underwear! Or I'll tell
everyone about 'sunny' in front of Kuroda Michiyo.

#8: This is Shikamaru, Kiba Akamaru isn't lego, Ino's taken him hostage. You
better come and get him before Chouji eats him, she's taken him hostage too
because she's got an addiction for it. It's all too troublesome.

#9: Shikamaru again, Akamaru escaped because he pissed in Ino's face. Turns out that training you do with him is pretty uselful then... My mum
said she saw you sneaking in my garden last night by the way. You better not
be eating out of my bins. I heard Hinata does that.

#10: I meant Neji not Hinata.

#11: Or they could both do it. You never know.

#12: HEY! It's naruto, of course. Your message sucks. Who'd love you, you're a big fat dogbrain! Anyways, do you know why Hinata was round by my bins at about 3 this morning? I thought it was a racoon but she squeaked too high for one of them when I came out with my big stick. ahhh... old biggie... how I love that stick... MINE! MY STICK!

#13:BROO - awww crap I can't say it anymore... I'm gonna go cry now... (sniffle)

#14:HIII! THIS IS Gai! I know I'm not your sensei, but I'm telling you, this is in your best intrests... you must buy my new product!

#15:MOOOHAHAHA... OH GOD! I can't stop! What the hell is wrong with me! I'm the Cowzeka- KAZEKAGE! I should be better than this! Kiba! my good friend! please help me! I am starting to think I have some serious problems.. I can only blame so much on my traumatic childhood, but how do you explain the cow thing? I have never been that close to a cow, I live in the desert, but I'm getting worried now.

#16 Also, I think waffles turn me on... is that wrong?

#17 YES! That's right! BUY GAI-SENSEI'S ALL NEW ALL SPECIES SPANDEX!

For you, your mum, your dog - whoever! The spandex does not discriminate! SO! Look ultra sexy and be uber powerful, within 28 days of shipping!

#19 I'm rolling the newspaper now, kiba... muahahahahahahahhaaaaaaaaaa... sorry Francis, I didn't mean to nudge you then... gasp! And you Louise! Wait... you guys are alive! I TAKE IT ALL BACK KIBA! YOU'RE THE BESTEST GUY ALIVE! MY BUGS ARE ALIVE! YAY! I DO A HAPPY TAPDANCE! "tap-squish-tap-smoosh-tap-splat" NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

#20 I'll get you back one day Kiba! Just you wait! I'm going to send
poisonous flowers in the post! I'll make your face burn too! Why must it
always be MY beautiful face! (cries)

#21 MY STICK MY STICK MY STICK MY STICK MY STICK MY STICK!

#22 Hallo, Inuzuka, K. We're "Mike", "Chester", "Bob", "Ryan" and "Caroline"

"You're meant to have a man name!"

"But... I like Caroline! It's like Kisame anyways!"

"You're Jimmy now."

We're from Pretty Weasle And The Uglies! We -

"I hate that name, Ita-... Tad."

"Shat up, Zets-...Chester. You're my bitch, and I'll make you do a dance routine to my beautiful music anytime I want you to."

"Yes, sir."

Anyways, we're promoting our debut single I Love You Cuz You're Evil Like ME, so, we'll sing you a few bars!

Ok, a one, a two, a one two three four!

"Baaby, you be sooooo eeeeeeviiiillllllll... oooooohhhh eviiiiiiiiillllllllll LIKE ME!

Dooo ya wanna go plaaaaaaaan worrrrrllllld dominaaaaaation with meeee?

I love yooooooouu cuz you're eviiiilllll like meeeeeee!

So Baaaby come plot eviiiiiiiiiiiilllllllllllll with meeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEE!"Hey, it's Yamanaka Ino, you've reached my answer machine. I'm probably not here because I'm out showing the world my beauty, or taking Chouji for walk.He's my pet now.