Chapter Eleven: The Choice
I couldn't move. I couldn't even open my eyes. It felt like I was being forced to breathe and my throat felt tight. There was a strange beeping sound, like my c-phone ringing, but more regular. Almost like a heartbeat…
I woke up in a bit of a panic. I had been completely enveloped by the covers and it was stuffy. I wriggled around until I wound up falling off one side of the bed. I laid there, sprawled on the floor for a minute.
*What is it with me and falling? I do entirely too much of that.
I had the feeling I had been dreaming but I couldn't remember what it had been about. It was hard to think, because it felt like my head wasn't quite attached to my shoulders. Probably because of the fall, or the stuffy air under the blankets. Probably…
I picked myself up off the floor and went about preparing to leave the room. This was going to be a big day. All I had to do was make my way through the Core, and then the capital. Then I would stand before the king. The king under the mountain that was going to try and kill me, no matter how little he wanted to do so…
When I put my sweater back on I noticed that it had shrunken. Was this a consequence of putting woolen clothing in the dryer? Even so, it was still rather baggy. I made sure to grab all the rest of my belongings before returning the room's key to the clerk. In the back of the lobby was a door with a big sign over it that said "CORE", so that was where I went.
The lights from the hotel didn't illuminate the entire path. Potted plants sat in the half-dark as I walked toward the bridge that would take me to the Core. Muted music from the restaurant faded the further away I went, until there was nothing but the sound of the wind blowing through the canyon below.
It was very dark. Strange red lights reflected off the metal bridge and stared like unwinking eyes from around the entrance to the Core. The detached feeling was back, and I had the thought, *Shouldn't this bridge be shorter?, even though I had no reason to think such a thing. I almost didn't notice the shadows of two monsters running through the entrance ahead of me, but Alphys called me. She sounded nervous at first, saying that nobody else was supposed to be here… then tried to encourage me not to worry.
The first thing I saw upon stepping into the Core was the elevator, and Alphys told me it would take me to the top but it turned out to be inactive. She sounded concerned but told me to go to the right, so I did. It only took me to a balcony surrounded by a fire pit, and a fight. The monster had been strong but I managed to spare them. Thankfully I had found better equipment than the bandanna, on my way here. Alphys said that this room wasn't on her map, so I had no choice but to go the other way.
Things went downhill from there. Blue and orange lasers came for me and she gave the incorrect order to dodge them in. She kept giving me incorrect directions and all the while monsters were jumping out at me. In one last bid to take control of the situation, she shut the power down to a room full of lasers that couldn't be bypassed any other way. But as I was walking down the corridor, she stopped me with a c-phone call just in time for the power to restore itself and trap me in blue lasers. It sounded like Alphys was fighting something as the power went off and on, letting me progress a little bit further each time. Once I made it to the end, she said that she had everything under control, but I think she was trying to convince herself of that, more than anything.
I reached a save point and Alphys said it looked nothing like her map. She said she had to leave so I started making my own map in my journal. While I did I felt detached, again. I felt like this place should have been smaller, but I didn't know why I felt that way.
It took a while and I kept getting attacked by more and more strong monsters, but I finally found the switch that would let me progress. I made it to the door that would lead me forward… and another save point. I thought about going back to the resort, but decided against it. While I had earned quite a bit of money from the monsters trying to stop me, what could I possibly get that might help me?
Besides, even if I died, I would just wind up right back here…
The next room had a raised dais in the middle. I stepped upon it to find Mettaton. The steps to the dais disappeared and the robot confirmed all of my suspicions. This had all been a grand play, where Alphys wished to be the heroine of my story by "saving" me from the "malfunctioning robot".
But after telling me this, Mettaton said, "However, I'm done with this charade. I've never wanted to harm humans, for my true calling is to entertain! I've always believed the audience deserves a good show. And what's a good show without a little plot twist?"
Someone was banging on the door. I could just barely hear Alphys saying, "H-hey! What's g-going on!? Th-the door is locked!" She kept banging as Mettaton went on.
"Sorry folks, but the old program's been cancelled! But our new finale will drive you wild!" The stage rose beneath us and I struggled to maintain my balance as Mettaton declared his new show would be called "Attack of the Killer Robot!". I was dragged into a fight.
He said he had rearranged the interior of the Core using its swappable parts to confuse Alphys. He had hired all the monsters in there to kill me. But killing me himself would be a hundred times better, and I had no way of fighting back. My soul was yellow again but my bullets were just bouncing right off. Their earlier efficacy had clearly been feigned.
He called me weak. He said Asgore would take my soul and he would go on to destroy humanity. But if Mettaton took my soul, he could go to the surface and become the star he dreamed of being with millions of fans. He would finally have it all…
I would have said something snarky, something along the lines of "good luck with that, because I'm not sure there's that many humans around anymore," but it was taking all my concentration to survive his attacks. Finally, Alphys called and told me about the switch on his backside that would make him vulnerable. I used his narcissism against him by telling him there was a mirror behind him and flipped it, only to find myself in yet another plot twist…
All I had done was reveal his new body, a humanoid form with the most beautiful male face I'd ever seen. Music the likes of which I'd never heard before started blaring, and he promised to make my final living moments "absolutely BEAUTIFUL!" He started posing and a graph marked as "ratings" appeared. They were steadily falling the longer I took to act.
The attacks were even more intense than before, and I'd only just started! I ran out of items, but I did notice the food I bought from the resort boosted the ratings. I could only fire bullets at him when the heart in his abdomen left its casing. Bombs and miniature Mettatons were flying everywhere, as were copies of his legs, for some reason. I swore as one last bomb took the last of my HP and I was sent back to the save star. Thankfully the elevator back to the bottom was working, now.
As I went back to the resort to do some shopping, people were chatting excitedly about the upcoming show. I noticed that, whenever they spoke of their favorite moment, it was correlating to the actions I could take in the fight. Were the ratings an indication of how many people were watching us fight? If I pandered to the audience, too, would the fight end faster? It was worth a shot. I saved again and stepped onto the stage. Before Mettaton could monologue I got him to turn around and flipped his switch.
His attacks followed the same pattern as before. Before an "easy" turn I could boast because I knew I wouldn't take damage (the face he made when I said "Thy slings and arrows shan't touch me this turn, clockwork fiend!" was so funny!). If I knew I'd be hurt I would turn on a heel and scoff at the audience so any damage I took would be worth more ratings (although I had to guess where to scoff, because there was no visible audience). But then we got past where I had died before so I just stuck to striking poses. I noticed that, if I did so when my HP was below a certain level, it got more ratings. But I couldn't keep my health too low for too long so I would eat the MTT-brand food I had bought for the purpose.
Mettaton had exposed his heart twice, and I suppose my bullets had hit it enough because his arms fell off. I was a little alarmed but he just said, "Who needs them with legs like these? I'm still going to win!"
He grew frustrated with my persistence, asking me if I really wanted to jeopardize humanity's future like this. He asked me if I believed in myself that much. He was inspired, but it would only be him or me and he wasn't going to make it easy. He showed me the power of "humanity's star" and exposed his heart again. It was getting harder and harder to dodge his bullets and hit his heart, but I managed to hit it enough for his legs to fall off.
He wasn't deterred. "So you think you can be the star? You think you can protect humanity? We'll just see about that!" He exposed his heart one more time, and that turn finally pushed the ratings into the ten-thousand range.
He paused the action to remark upon it, and said one lucky viewer would have the chance to call in and talk with him before he left the Underground forever. When he got somebody on the phone a familiar, ghostly voice was on the other end. From the look on Mettaton's face it seemed as though the voice was familiar to him, too…
Napstablook spoke in their shy manner, but still said that they had liked watching Mettaton. Their life was boring but his shows had brought excitement to their life, vicariously. Napstablook said they would miss Mettaton, then hung up because they felt they'd talked for too long.
"No, wait! Wait Bl…" Mettaton's expression wasn't so confident, anymore. He decided to take more and more calls. Each one was somebody expressing how happy he had made them, how much they would miss him…
"I… I see…" He smiled. "Thank you, everyone, for those lovely calls." To me, he said, "Darling, perhaps… It might be better if I delay my big debut on the surface. If I leave now, the Underground will lose its spark! Besides, you've proven you're very strong. Perhaps even strong enough to get past Asgore. I'm sure you'll be able to protect humanity."
His smile became rueful. "Ha ha… It's for the best, anyway. The truth is this form's power consumption is… inefficient. I'll run out in a moment and… well…"
I was concerned. "Does that mean you're… dying?"
He laughed. "Oh, no no no! I'll be alright! I'm just going to need a little nap, is all." More seriously, he said, "Anyway, knock 'em dead, darling. And to all my lovely viewers, thank you! You've been a great audience!"
The light went out from his eyes, and he fell silent. Alphys finally made it into the room and saw Mettaton. She cried out to him, running over to check on him. After checking, she said, "Thank GOD, it's just the power crystals." Almost too softly to hear she added, "If you were gone, I would… Would…"
She remembered my presence and turned to me, nervous smile in place. "I m-mean, n-no problem, y'know? He's j-just a robot. If you messed him up I could always… I could j-just build another…" I highly doubted she make another one just like him, but I chose to stay silent. Mettaton and I had ruined her plans enough, and I didn't want to sound like I didn't have faith in her abilities. It's just that I had a feeling he wasn't a mere machine, to her…
Alphys said she needed a moment, so I left her with her sleeping friend and walked through the door that would take me to the elevator. Alphys soon followed me, and we walked through the hall. She was clearly nervous as I waited for her to "convince" me to stay, but she never even tried… I made it all the way to the elevator and opened its doors before she tried to say goodbye, only to confess the whole truth to me, and the terrible price I would have to pay if I wished to leave.
Before I could tell her I didn't want to leave she ran away back down the hall. I regretted my decision to let people believe what they wanted more than ever, but I still stepped into the elevator and took it to the very highest floor it could reach. It took a much longer time than the other elevators I'd taken in Hotland, but I made it eventually. I made it to New Home…
The city looked like much what I had seen in the Ruins, only it was in a much better state of repair. I made it to a building that was laid out as an exact copy of Mother's home, except it was colored drably. The stairs to the basement were blockaded by chains with padlocks so I tried to just slide myself under the chains, but I couldn't. Some sort of magic was at work, so I had to look for the keys.
The living room was heart-achingly familiar, but there was no fire in the fireplace, and the tools next to the bookshelf were all for gardening. The shelf had photo albums where everyone was smiling… including Mother. On the table sat a golden flower in a vase…
In the kitchen I found a key, so I put it on my phone's keychain. I noticed crumpled-up recipes for butterscotch-cinnamon pie in a trash can and I remembered that I still had the slice I'd put in the very first box I'd come across. I moved it into my hip pack as I walked to the hallway with the bedrooms.
More golden flowers were in vases in the hall. I found another key, and opened the door to what would have been my room, back in the Ruins. There were two beds, here, and gifts on the floor. I coughed as I stirred up the thick dust covering everything. It seemed as though this place wasn't visited very often, if at all. I looked at the presents and was confused as to why there would be an old knife in one (which I left in there) and a golden heart-shaped locket in the other… I thought about taking the locket, because it might have helped me in the upcoming battle, but it was clearly meant for somebody else. As I ran my fingertips through the dust that was on the gift box's lid, it seemed like it had been waiting here for its recipient for a very long time…
I decided to borrow it, for a while. I could always return the locket, once everything was finished. I was going to give Asgore a piece of my mind and end this war. Then I could go back and I could convince Mother to leave the Ruins. Maybe I could ask Sans to help me… But I'd return the locket, before then.
The only other things of note in the room was the wardrobe full of dark-green striped sweaters, and a family photograph. Mother, an even taller goat-looking monster with great big horns, blonde hair and a bushy beard, and a little goat were all in it… along with another child covering their face with a bouquet of flowers. All the monsters were smiling so happily…
I unlocked the chains and finally went into the basement. After a long walk I had made it to the streets of the capital… which was packed with monsters. I was nervous about being surrounded but nobody seemed inclined to fight me. In fact, when a Froggit hopped in front of me it was just to begin the tragic story of the prince of the monsters, and the first human to fall into the Underground. As though emboldened by the simple Froggit's gesture more monsters would approach me with another part of the story. Together, they all wove the tale…
By the end of the story my head was feeling detached, again. I felt like I'd already known the entire thing before it was ever told... I dragged myself back into the present with an effort of will, and found myself in a sunset-colored corridor. I saved, then walked forward. Thick shadows sat between the great windows lining the wall to my left and pillars lined up on either side. Finally, someone else stepped out from behind a pillar…
He wore a black vest over a tailored white shirt, black trousers tucked into polished black boots… and a familiar black hood over his head. A set of scales and the Delta Rune were embroidered in gold on his left breast. The right breast bore a sword crossed with a scythe, also in gold… A bell rang thrice in the distance and the voice I'd heard over a candlelit table spoke to me now, without a trace of his usual humor.
"So, you finally made it. The end of your journey is at hand. In but a few moments, you will meet the king, and together you will determine the fate of the world. That is then. Now, you will be judged."
He spoke as though he was quoting something from the depths of time. "All thy deeds will be laid bare. All thy EXP and LOVE will be measured and weighed." His left eye, the one he was always closing when he winked, glowed from the shadow of his hood. It wasn't the little white pupil I was accustomed to but a full, yellow iris that flickered pale blue along the rim. It felt like he was staring into the depths of my soul and I could feel my sins crawling on my back…
I quailed. I couldn't look away, but I didn't want him to see… I didn't want him to know what I'd done before coming here! I didn't want to lose what little friendship I had gained from him! But he was implacable. In an effort to distract him, I asked him what "EXP" was.
It didn't work. His eye continued to glow as he answered. "It is an acronym. It represents one's 'Execution Points.' It is how we quantify the pain one has inflicted upon another. If you had killed, your EXP would have risen. With enough EXP, your LOVE would have also risen.
"LOVE, too, is an acronym. It represents one's 'Level of Violence.' It is a way to measure one's capacity to hurt others. The more violence you commit, the easier it is to distance yourself. The greater the distance, the less you will be hurt. Because of that, you will be able to hurt others all the more easily." His eye finally stopped glowing, but I swear I could still feel him looking inside me. "LOVE can rise without killing. It is merely hidden from view, but I can see..."
He sighed deeply and his shoulders slumped. He shoved a hand into a trouser pocket as his other hand pulled down his hood. His voice and eyes were back to normal as looked at me with a sad expression and said, "normally, it's a lot clearer than this, but you are just determined to block me! why, kiddo? i can see that you're a good person that wouldn't hurt anybody, if given a choice. but there's this whole other side of you…" He shook his head, still sadly. "wish i could say i've never seen its like, but i have."
He tried to smile. "talk to me, frisk. tell me who hurt you. tell me who drove you into whatever it was you did to raise your hidden LV. i'm all ears…"
I was shaking. I never thought anybody would understand. I'd never allowed for the possibility that anyone could understand. I didn't want anyone to know… but I could still feel his hands around my throat and I couldn't stand it, anymore. I had to make a choice…
I decided I wanted someone to know of his sins… even if it meant I had to reveal mine, too. I had to come clean, about everything. I made myself say my real name.
"M-my… My n-name i-isn't really Frisk, it's… I-I'm Francine Isabella Kane, a-and I… I assaulted my uncle, started a fire in his stable and stole his horses when I ran away." I faltered and just stood there, shaking. I couldn't even look at him…
I heard him sigh. "welp, that explains a few things, but not everything." He paused before saying, "why'd you do it, kid?"
Remembered fear and pain shut my mouth as I heard my uncle promise he'd kill me if I ever told anybody what he did to me. I didn't want to say… but he wasn't here. I told myself that over and over. I punched the tomato in my mind, again. Strangely, once I started, the easier it became to keep going.
"He… h-hurt me. Again and again and again…! No matter how much I begged him to stop, it just made him happy. He always had this smile on his face... His stupid, ugly face!" I finally looked at Sans. Hate was probably dominating my expression, but I couldn't help it. "No matter how many times I called for help, nobody came. Nobody was going to save me. Nobody cared! I realized I would have to be my own knight in shining armor. I would have to avenge my own honor!
"…no, I lie. I would be a black knight and seek revenge. I wanted him to suffer."
I drew in a shaky breath before continuing. "All he cared about was his money and the things be bought to make himself look important. He bred and sold horses, so I wanted to burn down the stable and scatter them all over the countryside. I also wanted to burn down the house where he kept his things and destroy it all, except for what I could steal for my own use. Everything I brought with me to Mount Ebott was taken from his attic."
Sans only nodded. "and the assault you mentioned?"
I hesitated. My throat was trying to close up, again. Why it kept doing that when Mother had healed the worst of those injuries when we met was beyond my understanding. I probably already lost Sans' friendship, so there was no point in withholding the information he wanted… I tried to numb my feelings as I continued my confession.
"He… My uncle caught me while I was trying to set up oil lamps to burn in the basement. He figured out what I was trying to do and he was so mad… I tried to run but he caught me, anyway. He was choking me… and I just grabbed the nearest thing I could and bashed him over the head with it. It was a bottle of wine and it broke. I… I threw the glass still in my hand at his eyes before I grabbed another wine bottle and hit him over the head, again. He finally stopped moving… but I didn't start the fire, like I wanted to. I was too scared he'd wake up while I was trying to light it. But I still started the fire in the stable and ran off with his horses." I declined to mention the horse I had ridden to the foothills of Mount Ebott had thrown me off his back, fracturing my arm. It had been difficult to set that splint with one hand… but I'd been determined to get away, no matter how much pain I was in.
I was shaking, again. "I… I was just so mad at him! I'd already lost my parents, my home, my future, my dignity… He just kept taking more and more away from me until I had nothing left but my pitiful excuse for a life! I had to take it back, before he killed me and left my body in the woods to rot!"
I fell to my knees, crying. "I… I don't even want to go back to the surface! I don't want to run into him out there, waiting for me! I never even wanted to leave the Ruins and Mother, but… She was trapped in there. Trapped by her own fear, just like I was. I wanted to tell off Asgore and maybe get him to stop killing humans so she could come out... But even if I failed, at least I'd get to see the rest of the Underground before I died."
I smiled for the first time in what felt like an eternity. "It's been like living out a dream! A fantasy brought to life… I met people that I could care about, that cared about me, too. I've seen marvelous contraptions so much like things I know once existed, but are still unique to monsterkind. I wish I could stay and learn how everything works, but…"
My smile faded. "But this isn't a dream for the monsters, is it? This your life. That bastard kept me in his dirty old basement, but at least I could still leave whenever I wanted by picking the lock. You can't do that. There's only one way you can stand under the sky, and that's what your king has been trying to accomplish, all these years. Even when he doesn't want to kill anyone he places that burden upon himself, for all your sakes…" I sniffled, and wiped my eyes with a sleeve.
I sat on the floor, staring at Sans' boots. I didn't think my legs would support me, and I couldn't think of anything more to say. I didn't even know if he was going to let me go. I waited and waited for him to do something…
He finally sighed. "couldn't have made my job easy, could ya, kiddo?" When I looked up he was rubbing the back of his neck with one hand, both eyes closed in thought. He shoved that hand into the other pocket and looked down at me. "welp, since you've already confessed, you got anything you wanna say for yourself?"
I thought about it, then said, "I'd be lying if I said I was sorry for what I did on the surface, so I guess… all I have to say is 'thank you.'" Sans seemed a little bit surprised at that, but I wasn't done. "Thank you for all the help you've given me. Whatever you have to do for your job I hope you… Just know I won't hold it against you."
I grimaced as I said, "I've made my bed. It's time to lay in it." I finally found the strength to stand and wondered what Sans was going to do, next. Doing his job might force him to break his promise… I could only hope he could see how sorry I was, for that.
He raised a brow ridge at me and said, "you are way too mature, for your age." He shook his head. "here we go…"
He took his hands out of his pockets and walked toward me, his footfalls echoing off the pillars as his eyes went black. His expression was stuck in a death's head grin and I closed my eyes, trying to hide the sudden spike of fear I felt as he lifted his left hand. If I died here I was just going to come back... He was going to kill me over and over until I gave up. Even if he didn't remember it, I would. Would I be able to confess like that again? Did I even have the option to say nothing? Was there any way to avo-
His hand grabbed my right cheek in a vise grip and pinched me! It jarred me out of my thoughts and made me squeak. My eyes teared up as I opened them. Sans' entire expression was alight with humor as he brought his other hand up to pinch my other cheek in a grip as strong as the other. He stretched my face a little as he pinched and I could only grab at his wrists while I thought, *How can hands without muscles or tendons be so strong!? Finally he started talking.
"i dunno if you've noticed, kiddo, but crimes committed on the surface are a bit outta my jurisdiction. that being said, somebody's gotta teach you a lesson. theft, arson and assault are bad." He used his palms to squish my face into itself as he added, "no! bad frisk, bad! dat's a no-no! we don't do dat!" Sans squished me for a second longer before he let me go. I tried to hide my blushing and abused face in my turtleneck while I stared at him in confusion. He was smiling, but that faded a little.
"to me, it sounds more like it was self-defense. at least initially. god knows how easy it is for somebody's emotions to get away from them, especially that much fear." His smile faded completely. "if anything, your uncle should be the one down here, being judged…" He shook himself. "but whatever decisions the SOUL named 'francine' made, the SOUL named 'frisk' hasn't done anything of the sort.
"even if you never gained any LOVE at all, that wouldn't have meant you were completely innocent or naïve. just that you kept a certain tenderness in your heart. no matter your struggles or hardships, you strived to do the right thing. you always refused to hurt others, no matter what they did or said to you. given your history, that is a very remarkable thing…
"you never gained LOVE down here, but you gained love. does that make sense?"
I nodded a bit uncertainly. "I… think so?"
Sans chuckled a bit. "whether it does or not, that's not gonna change what's about to happen." He became serious, again. "now. you're about to face the greatest challenge of your journey. your actions here will determine the fate of the world. if you refuse to fight, your SOUL will be taken and humanity will be destroyed. but even if you can get asgore to spare you, monsterkind will remain trapped. what will you do?"
I didn't have an answer for him, but Sans didn't look like he was expecting one as he shrugged. "personally, i'd have thrown in the towel a long time ago. but you didn't get this far by giving up, did you? you have something called 'determination.' as long as you hold on to what's in your heart, i believe you'll do the right thing."
He stepped into a shadow. "we're all countin' on you, kid. good luck." He smiled, then blinked out of existence…
Part of me was relieved that he didn't kill me. Another part was surprised I'd gotten off so easily. The third was miffed that he'd taken such liberties with my person and talked down to me like I was a misbehaving dog!
I laughed. It was just like Sans to leave me feeling so confused. Even so, he believed in me. He truly believed in me…
I continued through the corridor with my head held high. I was going to find a way to help the monsters without dying, for his sake. For Papyrus and Undyne and Alphys… for Mother. And for Asgore's sake, too.
If Mother could put her fears aside, so could I. They were all going to be free.