Marian suppressed a shiver of fear and bobbed a curtsey to Sir Guy, keeping her eyes averted and raising the pitch of her voice. "Yes, milord?" She could have thanked the Sheriff now for the punch to her face because it helped disguise some of her features and lessened the risk of discovery.
Sir Guy stared at her, frowning. "I know you," he said.
Her stomach flipped and her throat closed up. "Me, sir? Pardon your lordship, but I think you're mistaken. I'm Holly, the new kitchen maid."
He seemed a little confused and the longer she stood there the more the risk there was he actually would recognize her. Marian kept her eyes on the ground desperately praying his attention would pass soon. There was a crash as someone dropped a tray behind him and Guy turned, distracted by the verbal tirade Carver was giving the unfortunate servant.
He shook his head as the mess was cleaned up and then turned back to her. "I need you to take me to the Sheriff, where is he?" he said.
A chill of apprehension ran down her spine. Someone in her position saying no to someone like Sir Guy was bound to raise suspicions, but she had no choice. If she took him to the Sheriff she was done for.
"Milord," she stammered, "I—I just came from the Sheriff." She shifted uncomfortably, trying to hint to Sir Guy what she was almost sure he guessed. "I can't go back there, Sir," she whispered. "He told me not to until…until he sent for me again." There was a catch in her voice that hinted she was close to tears. It surprised her because she definitely didn't plan to put it there.
It seemed to work because she noticed his face soften and he looked sickened, but she knew the emotion wasn't directed at her. "He is in his chambers, then?"
"I believe so, milord," Marian said.
"Very well," Sir Guy nodded to himself. "I will see him myself. Carry on with…what is that?" he asked, looking at the sack in her hands.
Marian kept her face very still. "It's a delivery for Maggie, sir," Marian said. "Some special spices for the kitchen. It has to be packaged special."
Sir Guy looked thoughtful. "Well, I'm sure whatever Maggie's using it for will be delicious. You're dismissed," he said. Marian bobbed another curtsey and turned around, feeling his stare on the back of her neck like an itch.
Once she was out of view she let out the breath she didn't realize she had been holding. This time, she ran. Guy was on her way to the Sheriff's room and even if he hadn't already come to, her time was still going to be short. Marian flew down the stairs, rushed through the kitchen without taking the time to look at who saw her, and ran into the compost room. She opened the circular wooden door and peered into the black chute. She saw daylight at the bottom along with a large wooden cart full of food scraps and unknowable compost that came from daily living. Without any further thought Marian clutched the bag and box to her chest and slid into the chute, letting gravity pull her down until she landed with a thud in the cart.
Marian wrinkled her nose, uncomfortable with sitting in garbage no matter how dire the situation. She struggled out of the cart and brushed loose food scraps off of her clothing. Looking around, she noticed the rays of sun coming up over the walls. She was in a small courtyard with only an archway and three walls separating it from the town. Marian walked to the archway, looking around to see if anyone was around. Thankfully, it was still early enough in the morning that the only people up where those who were setting up for business, and nobody in their right mind did business next to a garbage heap.
She walked out of the courtyard and went into town, weaving through alleys and behind houses, hoping to throw off any pursuit while still heading in the general direction of the gates. There were a few people out who were giving her some strange looks, but at this point Marian didn't care. If she could just get out of Nottingham, she would be safe. Robin and his men were still in Sherwood and she didn't have time to wait for him to get here. She skirted the business street and felt a wash of relief when she could see guards opening the gate to start the morning traffic. She caught a glimpse of a group of people gathered outside the gate waiting for entry. Most people at this time of day were coming in but there were also a few people waiting to get out. Marian had almost merged with the waiting citizens when a raucous clanging broke the still morning air. She jumped and whirled around in fear at the castle. A flock of startled birds rose into the sky, frightened by the noise. The alarm bells were ringing.
*RMRMRMRMRMR*
Robin stared into the small, pale flames of their morning campfire. He could hear the murmurings of his men around him, sometimes punctuated by quiet bursts of laughter. He tried to strategize, tried to think of what they needed to do next and plan for possible failures. But he couldn't. He would start off thinking about numbers, places for ambush, the list of people they needed to visit but in the next breath his mind wandered again, to the same place it always did since yesterday. The Kiss. He could still remember the shock he felt when she suggested it to distract the guards. He remembered the way his heart raced when she said it because as soon as she did he realized that he actually wanted to. He wanted to kiss her. He could still feel her lips on his, the way they had both unintentionally pressed together. Did she feel it too? Was it just for show?
Robin ran both hands through his hair, and clenched his fingers. He was now more confused than ever. He looked up and noticed John watching him. "What?" he asked, trying to hide his embarrassment.
"You seem distracted," he said.
Robin shook his head. "I'm fine." John glanced at the men around him and then moved closer to Robin, who looked at him with new concern. "What is it?"
"Rob, I hate to be the one to say this," he hesitated and looked around again to check for anyone listening in. "But there has got to be an explanation for the Sheriff avoiding our patrols so well."
Robin sighed, thinking of that particular other worry among the many he had. "I know."
"You've been thinking it too, then?" John asked.
He nodded. "The only way he could be this successful is if someone is feeding him information. But…why? Why would someone do that?"
John looked at him with sympathy and a lot of worry. "If someone really is feeding information to the Sheriff, the more pressing question is how are we going to find out who it is?"
"And how much do they know," Robin added quietly. Then a thought that froze him with dread entered his mind. "Marian. If they know about Marian and they told him…"
The look of alarm on John's face had Robin getting to his feet. He was trying to figure out what he had to do to get her out of there when Will came running up to the camp. "Will?" he asked, noticing how out of breath the boy was. The others had stopped talking at Will's arrival and rose to their feet as well.
"The alarm bells are ringing," Will said.
Robin frowned. "Did you see anything?" Will shook his head. Everyone was thinking of only one person who might have set off those bells.
"Robin, once those bells go off you know they close the gates," Alan, who was one of the first to volunteer for this recon group, said. "It will be almost impossible for her to get out." He looked worried and tense and Robin didn't blame him.
"You're right. We don't have a lot of time. Will you come with me," Robin said, squaring his shoulders. A young man with his little brother was less suspicious than a group of cloaked, armed men. "Everyone else, stay here but be ready to move as soon as we bet back." The bells were ringing and now it didn't matter what had happened, only that he had to get her out of there. He didn't realize it, but everyone else heard the steely command that came upon him in situations like this. The camp jumped to action and packed up the what little supplies they had brought. Will and Robin didn't have far to go before they reached the open field in front of Nottingham. He had picked a location that was hidden, but close enough to aid Marian if she needed it.
The bells had stopped ringing by the time the two of them arrived. As they neared the gate, Robin put his hood up when they heard heated voices. There was a small group of people crowded at the gate yelling at the two guards who were blocking the entrance and exit. There were quite a few people outside and even a small group on the inside. Robin could tell the guards were having a hard time keeping control of the crowd and he could detect some nervousness under their gruff demeanor.
"You know the rules!" one of them shouted. He sported a beard and there were lines on his face, marking him as the more experienced of the two. "When the bells go off no one comes in or out. Now clear out so we can shut the gate!"
There was some angry mumbling. "Ya cannot do this!" one of the farmers from the outside shouted. "The only business we get is in the town. Ya'll bleed us dry with taxes anyhow!"
The mumbling grew louder in agreement. Robin scanned the crowd, looking desperately for Marian. Will tugged his arm and then nodded to the left. Robin looked over the milling heads and then his blood ran cold. He saw her, hanging on the edge, waiting for an opportunity to slip out. But what made the fury run through his veins was the darkening bruise and swelling on her face. Someone had punched her. Then he noticed the way her hair looked to have been torn out of its bun and the rip on the shoulder of her shirt. Their eyes met and she smiled wryly at him, raising her eyebrows in a challenge.
Robin tried his best not show his anger and smiled back. "Will, head out," he murmured. "It might get dangerous here, quick.'
"I'm not going anywhere," Will said mutinously. "I'm helping get her out."
"Will!" Robin hissed. The boy glared back defiantly. Robin didn't have time to argue. "You are in so much trouble when we get back," he said and then he threw back his hood and sauntered into the middle of the restless crowd.
"Well now, gentlemen!" he called out. He noticed Marian rolling her eyes and he smiled. She was just going to have to deal with his plan. "What have we got here?"
The crowd looked confused for a moment, in accord with the guards for once. He started to hear whispers as he was recognized by the people. "Well?" he asked again.
"They ain't lettin' us go, Robin," one of the men trying to get out of the city said.
"Robin Hood?" the younger of the two guards questioned. They both drew their swords and Robin raised his hands.
"Swords? I'm flattered!" he said. "But, let's be honest with ourselves, shall we?" He said, looking at them like they were wayward children. "Those aren't going to work."
"Oh really?" the young one asked. The crowd's attitude started to turn even more hostile than before as the soldier stepped towards him. Hood smiled cheekily and clasped his hands behind his back. The two guards looked warily around them and backed off slightly. The crowd started to close in and he flicked his eyes over in Marian's direction. He saw her slip around the edge of the archway, skirting the edges of the crowd. Then she joined the angry group of people on the outside, hanging out on the back so it wouldn't seem like she was escaping.
"Now," Robin said. "You folks are worried about getting your money's worth?"
There was a grumble of assent and Robin looked to the soldiers. "And you two can't let them in, right?"
The guards glared. "That's right, Hood. And we also have orders to arrest you."
Robin feigned an injured look. "But then I won't be able to help you."
"And how do you think you're going to do that?" the old guard asked.
Robin smiled. It was a smile that made anyone in the Sheriff's pay extremely nervous. "Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't there a strong box inside your guard office with the tolls you collect from those entering the city?"
"That is no concern of yours!" the older guard snapped.
"Now it seems to me, we can end this amicably if you were to, say, distribute that toll as compensation for these good people's lost profit."
The grumbling rose to shouting at Robin's suggestion and the two guards finally realized the hopelessness of their situation. They were sadly outnumbered, and with Robin Hood at the helm of this mob they didn't have a chance until reinforcements arrived from the castle. The two guards glanced at each other, the younger one obviously leaving the decision to the elder. Robin pinpointed the moment when he gave it up. The man looked around at the angry faces on all sides and then met Robin's gaze once again.
"You're going to pay for this Hood," he snarled.
"Actually, I believe it is you who is going to pay at the moment," Robin replied. The villagers cheered as the guards sheathed their swords. But just as they were about to enter the guardhouse someone shouted.
"It's the Sheriff!" The guards turned back and sneered, the presence of the Sheriff putting some steel back into their spine. Robin could now hear the growing sounds of booted feet stomping down the road and getting closer by the minute.
The crowd closed in around Robin, pushing him back as hands guided him away. He crouched down and pulled the hood over his head once again. The crowd swarmed the gates and guards, hindering the Sheriff and his men while three figures disengaged from the crowd and ran off towards Sherwood.
By the time they made it back to the main campsite she was tired. Marian had done her best avoiding questions about her injuries. It helped when she showed the men the box of money she had managed to steal, though John and Robin both looked at her with a more critical eye. But she couldn't tell them what happened, not yet. She just…wasn't ready.
They entered the camp and it didn't take long for those who were waiting for their return to notice.
"You made it!" Hannah said with a relieved smile. She and Jenny greeted them and others trickled in behind them to hear what news Marian and the others may have brought. "We…we weren't sure whether or not to be worried."
Marian tried to give Hannah a reassuring smile and winced as her swollen face pulled a little. She felt unclean and as far from triumphant as you could get. Accomplishing their goal—getting the money—just didn't seem to matter right now. But she couldn't let them know. "Worry about me? Hannah, you should know better," she joked.
She winced inwardly at the way her voice sounded and it was clear the others could tell something was wrong. "I'm going to let Sky know I'm safe and sound," she mumbled. Marian turned away, ignoring the worry and concern on her friends' faces.
When she greeted Sky, who was resting next to Marian's tent, the little pony gently butted her head against Marian's chest and nickered. At that small gesture of comfort she couldn't hold on anymore. Marian buried her head in Sky's coat and cried.
*RMRMRMRMRMR*
Marian tried to act her normal self, but her friends noticed she was more subdued than usual. Jenny tried to distract her with learning snares and traps, and Hannah and Gen made her smile with little actions but for those who knew her they could tell she was hiding something. She didn't talk much about her time in Nottingham and Robin didn't have any way to approach her about what had happened, so he didn't.
They finished a conference one day and Robin watched her leave his tent with her head bowed, frustrated with they way she had closed him out. She was one of the first to slip out today when usually she would stay and chat. They were nowhere nearer to figuring out who the leak might be, or why exactly the Sheriff was sending out messengers on random nights. He didn't blame her for not figuring it out. If she had stayed any longer in the castle it was clear she wouldn't have come out. But now they had no information.
"Rob, can I speak to you?" John asked. He looked decidedly uncomfortable and Robin frowned. Everyone else had gone so it must be something he didn't want them to hear.
"What is it John?" he asked. "You know you always can always speak freely."
John rubbed the back of his neck. "Robin, you know how the Sheriff only recently started evading our ambushes."
"Yes," he answered warily.
"Who is the most recent addition to our group?"
Robin glared. "What's your point?"
"Something is bothering her," John said. "I don't like to think it any more than you do, but what if the reason that she wasn't found out by the informant was because…she is the informant."
Robin had trouble keeping his tone under control. "How could you even begin to think that? John, you know her! She would never betray us."
John frowned. "Robin, I'm here to make you think about things you may not want to. That's part of the deal. It was only after Marian came to us the Sheriff started getting the better of us. You think that's a coincidence?"
"Yes," he growled. "There is another explanation, there has to be."
"I'm not sorry I suggested it, Robin," John said quietly. "I have a hard time believing it, and I hope to God it's not true. But you have to consider all the options. Somehow, we're going to have find out who it is."
*RMRMRMRMRMR*
There was a satisfying thunk as her knife flew true and buried itself in the center of her target. Marian was breathing heavily, sweat running down her face and between her shoulder blades. She was nearing the end of her daily practice sessions, which she had started doing after her escape from Nottingahm to stay in shape. After the meeting, she needed to be by herself and this was the perfect outlet for her frustrations. They had talked in circles about finding the leak and she knew she disappointed everyone with her lack of information about the Sheriff. Stealing the money could only go so far to help their cause.
First, she practiced with her bow and then her knives. Next she performed unarmed combat forms, moving from one position to another in a deadly dance, since she was without a partner. Finally, to push herself, she would combine her forms with throwing and shooting at targets. It was a game she had started playing her second year as Will's apprentice to see how fast and how accurate she could be. She looked with pride at the knife solidly in the target.
"When I get back, Will had better watch out," she muttered, smiling. She had never been able to beat her master, and she knew it was a long shot she ever would, but it was fun to tease him anyway.
"Nice throw."
Marian looked up and saw Robin leaning against a tree with his arms crossed. She grinned at him, forgetting restraint in the satisfaction of her hard work and training. "You should see me when I'm not out of practice," she joked. He smiled and his eyes lit up. For a second, she remembered their kiss in the marketplace and the way he held her. They were alone then, as now, and her cheeks flushed. But then she remembered her encounter with the Sheriff afterwards and her smile faltered.
"Marian, I know something has been bothering you," Robin uncrossed his arms and stepped closer to her. She had to force herself not to back away from him. Instead she shrugged her cloak farther around her shoulders and let it's warmth envelop her. "There, well, there are some people who are concerned."
Something in the way he said it made Marian take a closer look at him. He appeared wary and uncertain which could be attributed to anything. But something told her there was more going on.
"What do you mean?" she asked. "I'm fine."
"It's just…" Robin huffed and then straightened his shoulders. He looked like someone about to jump off a cliff without any idea what was at the bottom. "We know it's suspicious, the way the Sheriff has been avoiding our patrol."
Marian nodded, not catching on. "I know. I told you what he said when the taxes arrived." He hesitated and she started to worry. "Robin, what's going on?"
"Some people, well, they are starting to wonder about what else the Sheriff might know," he finished lamely.
Marian shook her head. "I don't..." she stopped. His was uncomfortable and couldn't hold her gaze very long. It was like he was ashamed.
"You—you think it's me?" she asked softly. "You think I would do that to you?" She was surprised how much it hurt, his belief she might betray them.
"No!" he protested, reaching out to take her hand. "No, Marian I don't. But I have to put their concerns to rest and I can't do that unless you tell me what is going on."
She jerked her hand away, glaring at him. "I'm sorry I haven't proved myself enough to you," she said harshly, "that you even have to ask if it was me."
Robin's jaw clenched and fisted his hands into the pockets of his breaches. "I don't want to have to ask if it was anyone, let alone you!"
"I trusted you with the truth about me," Marian responded. "And after that you still think I would work for him?"
He frowned a little, catching the emphasis she put on the last word. "Then how did you get out of there without him knowing about you?"
She had been asking herself the same question ever since they realized there was a traitor in the camp. If the Sheriff knew about their patrol schedule then it would be safe to assume he should have known who Marian was the moment she came in into the castle. But that hadn't been the case and she couldn't figure out why.
"Marian, anyone who knows you can see you've been hiding something. I don't know what it is, but you can trust me," he urged.
That snapped her out of her reverie. "Oh, like you trust me?" She could see that comment stung but at the moment she didn't care. In the back of her mind she knew it was logical for him to wonder but the other part of her was angry. If she was being fair, the anger wasn't solely directed at him. She was angry with herself.
Marian brushed past him hoping this conversation would be easier if she wasn't looking at him. She went to the target and pulled out her knife, inspecting the blade to keep from having to turn back around.
"I'm worried about you," he muttered. She could hear the sincerity in his voice but refused to turn around. He kept talking, almost as if she wasn't there. "I know you aren't the leak. I know it and I will stand by you. But what am I supposed to say to the others who aren't as certain? Who don't understand? 'Trust me because I say so, because I…" He stopped and she picked at a piece of straw that was sticking out from the target, waiting for him to continue. "I won't lie to them Marian. They would follow me without explanation, or at least I thought they would." She heard the pain in his voice. He felt betrayed too. One of the men he trusted, who he thought would follow him anywhere, was giving them up to their enemy. He thought it was a reflection on him and it brought into question everyone around him. "But I can't have resentment in the ranks and I'm afraid that's what will happen if we don't find the real traitor soon. Rumors will start to spread.
Slowly she sheathed her knife, wavering. She needed to tell someone even if what she was feeling didn't make any sense. She could hear Robin sigh and then the leaves on the ground rustled as he started to move away.
"It was after I came back to the castle," she blurted. The noise stopped and she knew he was listening. Taking a deep breath and pulling her cloak tighter, she turned to face him. "I got back and was doing chores. It wasn't until late that he called me up to his chambers," she said. Marian proceeded to relate the assault in the Sheriff's room, Robin growing paler with the telling.
"I got away," she said, hearing her voice waver but distantly as if she was listening to someone else. "I got away but I shouldn't have. Why should I get to escape when I'm sure all the women before me had to suffer so much more than I did? He didn't get to do what he wanted. I stopped him." Marian met Robin's eyes. "So why do I feel so awful? I feel sick about it. What right have I to feel this way, to feel weak, when I was able to get away? I'm supposed to be a Ranger!" she shouted. "I'm supposed to be the protector of the country and it's people and I let one perverted…bastard make me feel vulnerable and ashamed. I got away, but I feel like he still won."
She didn't know when the tears had started, only that her cheeks now felt wet.
"Marian," Robin murmured. He stepped closer and suddenly she was leaning into him and his arms wrapped around her shoulders. She felt safe, like the way she felt when wrapped in her Ranger cloak and the fabric kept her warm against the mist and cold.
"You aren't weak," she heard him say. His voice was muffled against her hair. "You're human. It's okay to feel vulnerable and angry and scared because of what he did to you, what he," his voice tightened and she felt the slightest increase in pressure from his arms, like he wanted to keep her same. "What he might have done to you. That doesn't take away your strength. I wouldn't want anyone else protecting me and having my back but you." Robin pulled away and held her at arms length, looking into her eyes. "He attacked you Marian. You don't have any less right to your feelings than others who were his victims and it's okay to let it affect you. But his actions don't define who you.
"You are a Ranger. You're an ambassador to another world. You're a member of my team and Gen's favorite story teller," Marian laughed softly and Robin smiled. "You are my friend, Marian Harwood, the mysterious cloaked woman who can beat me at my own game. He cannot take that away.
"He didn't win," Robing said with conviction. "He will keep on losing until King Richard returns. We will beat him and when his bill comes due I'll make sure he pays for every single crime. He will know justice." Robin's voice was steel and she thought with a vengeance that she wouldn't want to be in the Sheriff's shoes when Robin Hood and his band came for him. But she did want to be there. If she got revenge then maybe she would stop feeling this way. It helped, a little, to finally tell someone about it and Robin didn't seem to think any less of her for it. But deep down Marian knew the only way she would feel better was to make sure the Sheriff paid, one way or another.
The two of them returned to camp together and already Marian seemed a little bit more like her usual self. She excused herself and went to sit with Hannah while the two of them did some much-needed mending. Robin watched her go, wishing he could do more. But there was thing he could definitely clear up now.
John was chatting with Lucy over the remains of the morning fire. Robin cleared his throat as he approached the two of them. When they stopped and looked up he smiled. "Mind if I steal John for a bit, Lucy? There are a few things I need to talk with him about."
Lucy waved a hand, granting permission. "Go on, I've business to be about anyhow."
Robin grabbed Little John by the arm and dragged him away. "It's not her," Robin said under his breath.
John raised his eyebrows. "Rob, I told you—"
"I know what was bothering her," Robin interrupted him. "And it's not guilt. She didn't betray us John."
"What happened?" John asked.
Robin shook his head. "Something happened while she was in the castle that had nothing to do with whoever is leaking information. It's not really for me to say," he answered John's questioning look. "But I know for certain it isn't her."
Little John rubbed his face. "All right. I had a hard time believing it to begin with but you're the boss. I believe you. Unfortunately that means we're back to square one. We know it's not Marian. So who else could it be?"
Robin glanced around the camp, watching the people he thought were loyal to the end. Some were laughing or arguing good-naturedly. Some sat by themselves doing everyday chores and others had already started crowding around the community fire for supper. All he considered friends or, at least, comrades. Which one of them would do this?
"That's the problem, John," he replied. "I have no idea."