The Essentials of Sociology

Chapter Eleven: Love of my Life, Pain of my Ass

A/N: Fun fact! The serious conversation between Morgan and Reid in the first little nugget of the chapter reminds me of a convo I had with my girlfriend a few months ago about coming out. I love you, bb.

This chapter is dedicated to my angel girl.

-BlueOleandar93

"Oh, for the love of—" Spencer whimpered, hiding his face his hands. After Spencer pulled on a pair of sweatpants and a red tee shirt (in the bathroom, away from Derek's wandering eyes and hands), dried his hair off with a towel and replaced his contact lenses with reading glasses, the two men sat stiffly beside each other on a twin bed and began watching the horror flick on Spencer's laptop. The movie was perched on Derek's lap because his legs were longer. No big. But here's the problem. When it comes to blood and violence, Spencer's perfectly fine. It's the gore he gets iffy with. He gasped and leaned into Derek's side, his eyes glued to the dark scene.

Derek ran his hand down Spencer's back in a soothing pattern and kissed his forehead, glancing back at the screen dismissively, "It's just a movie, baby boy."

Spencer groaned into Derek's shirt, "But people's intestines don't belong on the outside. It's… it's not right."

"It'll be over soon. I'll let you know okay?" Derek promised.

The noises on the screen got louder and louder, and Spencer grabbed on to Derek's arm and held it tight as he pushed his face further into Derek's shoulder. Derek chuckled, "You sure you're not trying to cop a feel under there?" Spencer scoffed and pulled closer to Derek, shaking his head. The older agent smiled down at Spencer and looked back at the screen. The sounds quieted and the plot seemed like it was picking up from the dialogue after a few moments. Spencer looked up at Derek, "Is it over?"

"It's been over for about five minutes now," Derek stated.

Spencer asked with confusion in his eyes, "I thought you were going to tell me when it was over."

Derek shrugged, "I was, but you were cuddling my arm like it was a teddy bear. Cute as fuck."

Spencer blushed, "Shut up."

"Tell anybody I called you 'cute' and you're dead," Derek glared down at the messy haired doctor.

Spencer sighed and snuggled closer, "You like it when I cuddle you?"

Derek looked away, cutting off their eye contact before saying quietly, "…yeah."

Leaning closer, Spencer lifted Derek's arm and pulled it around him, curling into his coworker's warm, safe feeling body. He felt Derek clear his throat and pull Spencer in tighter as if it were no big deal. Spencer looked up with an amused smile, "I like it. It's… different."

Derek mumbled, "Yeah… it is."

The movie played on and the two didn't move from that spot. From then on, the gross murder scenes didn't disturb him as much. He knew that Derek would be there to save him from the biological injustice that was happening on the screen. He felt Derek press a kiss to his hair and one or two on his lips during their little private showing. Before long, they'd forgotten all about the movie and missed the end of it as one or two kisses became passionate snogging. And it was… well, it was the most at peace Spencer has felt in a while. There was no pressure, no work, no thinking involved. All he had to do was sit there with Derek and be happy. So, he did just that.

When the movie ended, Spencer smiled up at Derek, "Well, that was nice."

Derek shrugged and smiled quietly, "The movie, or the whole part about my tongue being in your mouth?"

"You are so close to ruining the moment, Derek, I swear to God," Spencer warned, cuddling closer to his coworker after he shut the laptop and cast it to the side.

Derek chuckled and Spencer felt his chest quake with laughter as it pressed against his cheek. The agent was just so warm and stable. He made Spencer feel like he'd be safe no matter what. After years and years of friendship, and working together, Spencer knew that while Derek respected him and his decisions, he wouldn't let jack squat happen to him. Spencer has no clue how he does it, but Derek looks after him like a mother hen, and somehow still lets Spencer feel like he's his own man. Derek's protective behavior was overbearing and at times blatantly obvious, but Spencer never felt one moment's hesitation that Derek trusted, talked to, and treated him like the grown man he was. Even now when they're in this friend/lover quagmire, Derek doesn't ever try to feminize or demasculate him in any way. So, Spencer can snuggle up in Derek's embrace and feel safe without losing one tiny, miniscule bit of his manhood. As long as he's there in Derek's arms, he's more protected than the President. Fuck that, he is the President.

"I'm the President," Spencer breathed into Derek's shirt.

Derek chuckled, "Okay."

Spencer wrapped his arms around Derek's waist and pressed his face into his chest, "By the way… Derek?"

"Yes?"

"I…" Taking a shaky breath and closing his eyes, Spencer said confidently, "…well, I …I like you."

Derek said through a smile, "I think I got that. You literally just stopped making out with my face."

"Don't push it," Spencer growled.

"If it makes you feel better, those cute little sounds you make when I grab your ass make me smile," Derek remarked, leaning over to pinch Spencer's rear, eliciting an aggravated squeak.

Spencer blushed and folded his arms before warning, "Derek."

Derek's chest rumbled with laughter, "I'm sorry, Spence. What was it you wanted to say?"

Spencer mumbled out, "It would be… well, it would be nice if you would… maybe one day… we—uh… I could be your boyfriend, if you want… I mean, only if you want! No big deal! You know what, just forget I said it. It's stupid. I mean, I didn't plan to say anything about the current state of our relationship anyway. Forget it. Forget it all! Shit, I can't stop talking. Sorry, I just—gah!" Spencer hid his face into Derek's chest in embarrassment, "I'm such a geek. I'll shut up now."

There was a silence as Derek paused to take apart the jumbled sentences Spencer just threw at him and decode it. Derek took a breath, "… uh. Yeah. That's fine."

"What's fine? Me shutting up?" Spencer asked.

"No… the whole part about you being my boyfriend. I think that's pretty… cool," Derek nodded, "Not geeky at all."

Spencer bit his lip and looked up at Derek, "Really?"

"Yeah!" Derek tried to hide his smile and found himself grinning from ear to ear, "My mom's gonna kick my ass six ways from Sunday when she finds out."

Spencer asked quietly, "Because I'm a guy, right?"

"Hell yeah. There are no gay black men in Chicago," Derek said, his jaw clenching, "Not any living ones anyway. To be honest, chances are really high that… my mom will be disappointed that she, uh… she raised someone like me."

Spencer raised his eyebrows, "What do you mean by that?"

"You know… gay," Derek said steadily.

Spencer cried out, "You graduated in the top fifteen percent of your class with a master's degree. You're such a good football player that it paid for all of it! You put your life on the line every day to save other people. You're a fucking hero! How can she be disappointed in you? So what if you like guys, how does that change the fact that your mom should be the proudest woman on the planet?"

Derek growled, "Because she's just not, okay? You should see how she acted when news got out about one of my cousins moving to DC so he could marry another man. She was beyond disgusted. I wonder what she'll say when I tell her I'm the same way."

"So, your mom's homophobic?" Spencer asked worriedly.

Derek's muscles contracted, "Yeah. A little."

"You mean a lot…"

Derek grimaced, "Yeah, I mean a lot—you know what? I don't want to talk about it. I'm not going to talk about it. Let's chat about something else."

Spencer raised an eyebrow, "Um… okay. What?"

Derek shrugged, "The case?"

"Okay. Yeah… we all know Harrison did it. It's obvious. He's going to his sister's house for their Tuesday lunches. We're going to cuff him. We're going to hand him over to the PD. Then we're going home, and guess what? When we get there, you're still going to be gay."

Derek sighed, "Spencer, don't be like that."

"Don't be like what?" Spencer asked, "You're a grown man, you can make your own decisions. Including who you date. Your mom stopped dictating your life the second you got a lease."

"I just want her to be proud of me," he replied quietly.

Spencer bit his lip and shrugged, "If it makes you feel better, she already is."

"Yeah, I just can't wait for all of that to go away," he said, feigning enthusiasm.

"It won't, Derek. She loves you."

Derek hissed, "She loves the idea of me. Derek, her perfect, straight, FBI agent son. He saves lives, and one day he'll give her grandchildren. I mean, damn. I'm an unmarried man in my fourties, when will she give up the rose colored glasses and realize what the hell is going on? Even if I was straight, by the time my kids graduated high school, I'd be sixty and she'd be in a nursing home! Why can't she realize that I've been putting off introducing her to anyone I've dated because I've never dated anyone she'd approve of? I've haven't even had the experience of being with anyone I wanted to marry, or have kids with, or even liked. Why else would it take me this long to get married? Why hasn't she figured it out?"

Spencer sighed, "It's not her fault that you haven't come out to her."

"Well, she should know and I don't want to tell her!" Derek growled.

Spencer moved his hand down Derek's arm to lace his fingers through Derek's much larger ones before he replied, "It's going to be hard. I know. But… one day, it won't be. There will be you, and me, and… if it all pans out, we'll be in love. How bad does that sound?"

Derek paused with a faint smile, "I could be okay with that."

Spencer blushed and nodded, "So… are we like… 'together' now?"

"…I guess so."

"It's that simple?" Spencer asked.

"I now pronounce us boyfriend and boyfriend," Derek shrugged, "It doesn't get any more official than that."

Spencer raised an eyebrow, "… now what?"

He ran a hand down the side of Spencer's face, hand catching on the nightly roughness of his chin. He took in everything from the messy caramel hair down to the plump pink lips. Spencer could tell that he was being looked at, and for once, it didn't bother him. Nothing bothered him when Derek was around. Nothing at all. In his eyes, Derek told Spencer he was beautiful, and for the first time… he believed it.

Derek replied with a smirk, "I could put my tongue back in your mouth."

"Get out," Spencer sighed, "Leave."

"FBI!" Derek kicked the door of Harrison's house open and burst in, Spencer, JJ, Prentiss, Hotch, and Rossi on his tail as he shouted. They quickly went through the house to find the killer. Prentiss and JJ ran upstairs, Hotch and Rossi checked the ground floor, and Derek and Spencer flew to the basement. Guns ready and out, the two scaled the floor. Nothing was visible that would show any signs of murder, or at this point, even Harrison. It was just a normal looking basement with boxes and bags and dust. After kicking over a few boxes, Derek called out to Spencer, "It seems to be all clear down here. Are you staying sexy over there, baby boy?"

"Ten-four on that, Der," Spencer found himself smirking and took one last surveying look before saying back, "God, I hope he isn't upstairs."

Derek shrugged and made his way over to Spencer before something scrambled out of a box and came up behind Spencer. Before Spencer knew it, a strong hand was pulling his head back by his hair and there was a long, blade to his neck. Rendered speechless for a few seconds, he heard Derek say steadily, "Harrison? Lawrence Harrison?"

The voice slimy, seething sounding voice behind him scoffed, "What's it to you?"

"Agent Derek Morgan, FBI," Derek said, gun still held forward, "Drop the weapon."

The voice chortled lowly, "I'm not dropping anything with you two fags in the room. My ass is still a virgin, and I want to keep it that way."

"Drop the weapon, Harrison," Derek repeated, voice still steady and gun still pointed.

"Oh, please," Harrison chuckled and pushed the blade closer to Spencer's skin, "So, this your little 'baby boy' slut right here? Huh? I can see it, I really can. It probably didn't take much to get him to bend over, did it? He looks easy."

Spencer looked Derek in his eyes and nodded slowly, mouthing the words 'it's going to be okay.'

"This isn't about him or me, Harrison, this is about you. If you don't drop your weapon and step away from him, I will be obligated to shoot. Now you can put it down and come with me, or we could do this all day. There are four more agents in the house and half of the police station outside. You're not going anywhere." Derek replied calmly.

Harrison began to laugh harder, "Ooh, I struck a nerve, huh? You don't like me talking about your little boy toy?"

Spencer mouthed, 'it's going to be fine'.

Harrison yanked some more hair, "The fuck up, you little slut!"

"Drop the weapon." Derek thundered.

"Like fuck I will," Harrison laughed, "Jesus Christ. I should just off this little fairy on principal alone, I mean, come on. I wouldn't even need the blade," he taunted, running his finger across Spencer's jugular, "I could probably snap this like a toothpick. Hell, consider it penance for all of the sodomizing shit you've done. I hope you like Hell, kid. Bring some shorts, I hear it's hot!"

Derek asked again, "Lawrence, drop. Your. Weapon."

Harrison shook his head behind Spencer, snickering as he jumped when he grabbed hold of his rear, "Ooh, this is a nice one you've got here. I'm sure it feels better inside…"

"Shut the fuck up!" Derek blew a shot off of his gun right beside Harrison's head, "And drop your fucking weapon before I shoot you in the head and take it out of your cold, dead fucking hands!"

"Somebody's mad," Harrison snickered, "You do know that the ceiling's hard cement, right? There's no way you're sending off a little message to your GI Joe buddies."

Derek growled, "Drop it."

"No."

"Drop it."

"I don't think so."

"Drop it, or so help me God, I will…"

"What?" Harrison laughed, "You'll play Madonna until my ears bleed? I don't think you understand, faggot. I'm not scared of you. I mean, I was when you burst in here like the fucking Gestapo, but after a few moments, I realized that all you were… was a homo with a gun—"

Derek popped off another shot.

Harrison snickered, "Oh, I'm sorry. A homo with a loaded gun," he said before dragging the knife into Spencer's neck. It only took a moment before the sound of a gun shot rang out and Harrison was dead on the floor behind him. Harrison had barely gotten an inch of a swipe against his skin before Derek had killed him. Derek dropped his gun and strode up to Spencer, pulling him into an embrace. Spencer wrapped his arms around Derek as well, embracing him with all he had. He knew exactly what Derek was thinking mainly because he was thinking it too. A second more and that would be the last he would ever see of his mother, his team, and most importantly right now, Derek. They were so close to losing each other that they couldn't bear to be apart.

Someone cleared his throat and Rossi stood there, Hotch close behind. Rossi joked, "You two lovebirds okay?"

Spencer and Derek pushed apart quickly, blushing and looking away as Derek said simply, "Before anyone says anything… bro hugs are allowed in near death situations."

"He's right." Rossi shrugged to Hotch and asked, "So, Harrison? He's…"

"Dead. Harrison tried to kill Reid, and almost succeeded. If I was a moment late, he… he wouldn't be here." Derek said, voice wavering as he tried to keep it steady.

Hotch nodded to him sternly from across the room, "You did what was right, Morgan. I'll go talk to the chief of police and orderlies. In a couple minutes, we'll get you two to the paramedics."

"But, it's barely a cut," Spencer complained.

"A cut that needs to be recorded by a police official. If not, there's no proof that Morgan hadn't shot him in cold blood. Come on, Reid. You know this," Hotch replied placidly before leaving the room.

Rossi stayed and pushed his hands in his pockets nonchalantly, "So… what was he like?"

Derek asked, "Who, Harrison?"

"Yeah."

Derek sighed, "A dick."

Rossi gave him a look of sympathy, "If it makes you feel better, Hotch and I were halfway down the stairs when he was giving the end part of his little spiel. Sorry about all that, but… you were right to shoot. You saved a life. A very important one, at that."

"I'm just sorry you had to hear all that," Derek grimaced, rubbing his forehead with his fingers and sighing, "Speaking of… how much did you hear?"

"Enough," Rossi replied.

Spencer held up his palms, "Look, I know what he said was—"

Rossi shook his head, "No need. We know he was just trying to get to you. Since Reid was all he saw, Reid was what he used. Guys like him are really just people who feed off of other people's emotions. Reid's practically your best friend. Being accused of something like that must have been hard for you. Trust me, if it were me and Hotch down there, he would have said the same thing."

Spencer smiled weakly, "Probably. At least we know the real reason behind why he was going after those girls."

"We do?" Rossi asked.

Spencer shrugged, "He's a sexual pessimist with homicidal tendencies."

Rossi raised an eyebrow, "But he didn't…"

"He didn't rape the girls. But, then again, he didn't have to. He must have failed them surreptitiously so that they approached him, and since they all seemed to be good students, he knew they'd be uncomfortable talking to him in a room full of witnesses. He must have poked and prodded at the girls weeks before killing them."

Rossi folded his arms, "And how did you come to this conclusion?"

Spencer replied, "He seems to have a fixation on sexual situations and scenarios. He sexualized me every time he spoke, trying to get the same rise out of Morgan that he feels in himself when he's turned down or angered by the opposite sex. Furthermore, he may have wanted to pass on his sadism to another person, especially a person of such magnitude who stands for everything he is against."

Rossi paused, "… why aren't you a lawyer?"

"When you find out, tell my mom," Spencer shrugged.

"Will do," Rossi chuckled, turning to walk up the stairs, "I've had enough of this joint. I'm leaving. See you two soon."

As soon as Derek heard the door close, he held Spencer to his chest again and kissed his forehead before whispering, "I don't know what I'd do if I let him kill you."

Spencer held tight to Derek, "It's fine. You did what you had to do."

"I know, I just hate doing it," Derek revealed, "Killing people… it's not why I joined the Bureau."

"But you saved a classroom full of girls. And me," Spencer replied, pulling back to look at him and winking, "You're my hero."

Derek chuckled and ran his hands up and down Spencer's back, "Aww, shucks."

"Get over here," Spencer laughed, pulling Derek in for a kiss by the edges of his vest.

Spencer was sitting at the edge of the ocean, looking out at the sea. He was so close to the water, that he could feel the spray of the salt against his skin and the froth of the waves on his toes. Derek's arms were around him, and Spencer looked up. He opened his mouth to say something and Derek pressed a finger against his lips to quiet him before looking back at the sea and holding him closer. A smile was present on his lips. This is what it feels like to be happy.

"Hey, wake up, Reid," Derek's voice rang out beside him.

Spencer opened his eyes lazily and yawned, "The plane land?"

"No," Derek remarked, rolling his eyes, "But you're cuddling the shit out of my arm."

Suddenly aware of his surroundings (and the persons occupying his surroundings), Spencer shoved himself away from Derek as if he were on fire and scooted to the other end of the couch, "Eww, eww, eww."

The plane broke out in laughter. When everyone's head was turned, Spencer looked Derek up and down, sending a wink his way. Derek raised his eyebrows and pointed at himself, mouthing to him, 'me?' Spencer nodded.

Prentiss called out, "Why'd you stop? It was so cute!"

Derek and Spencer looked at her in disbelief and said simultaneously, "Eww."

Rossi grinned, "The way the UnSub was talking to them, I don't think they'll be comfortable touching for the next few months."

JJ frowned, "That bad?"

Spencer lowered his voice and shook his head, "You have no idea. He gave us all kinds of sexual imagery."

"Enough," Hotch replied, raising his hand to quiet his team, "He provided sufficient amounts of that, thank you. You can talk about it as much as you want on your down time; just keep it out of places I can't escape like the plane."

"Sorry, Hotch." Spencer laughed, "We'll try to keep it to a minimum."

Derek joked in a stage whisper, "Damn, it's sexy when you apologize."

The team began to laugh again, excluding Hotch who was shaking his head disapprovingly. Derek snickered, "Oh, Hotch. You seem so proud."

"Of course, my team is laughing about the ramblings of a violent UnSub," Hotch murmured, "Of course."

Prentiss replied, "Don't look too disappointed. Hey, we can all get drinks at my place after to celebrate another case closed."

JJ grinned and raised a hand in agreement, "I'm in. How about you, Rossi?"

"Not this time," Rossi sighed, "For now, I just want to go to sleep."

Hotch nodded, "I second that."

"Fine," JJ replied, "We'll send pictures, so you can see how much fun we're going to have."

Hotch waved his hand irreverently, "Go nuts."

Prentiss grinned, "We will. Tonight, me and JJ are getting Reid drunk."

Spencer's face fell and he asked, "Why me?"

"Because we've seen everybody on this plane get completely wasted, but we haven't seen it happen to you," JJ replied.

"But, it's fairly dangerous ingesting enough alcohol to offset the natural workings of your brain," Spencer groaned.

Prentiss shrugged, "So?"

"There are all kinds of blood, liver, and heart disorders that can come from moments of heavy intoxication," Spencer mumbled.

JJ scoffed, "So?"

He tried weakly, "I don't wanna."

Prentiss and JJ laughed, "So?"

"This," Morgan chuckled, "I need to see."

A/N: Just a heads up for the next chapter, a portion of it is going to be in Morgan's POV for three reasons. 1) Reid's going to get drunk. 2) I've never been drunk before (when I wrote this), so I can't properly personify him. 3) Fact: Drunk people can be some of the most fun people to hang out with ever, especially when they're usually cool and collected while sober.

-Le Bleu