So some very nice people have said some especially nice things since the last chapter, so I want to that you all very much for that. As ever, I'm hoping that you enjoy this next chapter.

Edit: Sorry I forgot to put the line breaks in earlier so some paragraphs must've seemed out of place. All fixed now.


"Christ, Naoms, I thought you were only going for three days. What's with all the... Shit?" Effy had wandered into Naomi's room when Naomi had not been back from packing in the five minutes she'd promised. Effy had decided that, instead of waiting any longer, she'd spark up the spliff and take it to Naomi.

"Jesus, Eff! Are you ever going to stop scaring the shit out of me, creeping up like that?"

Effy shrugged. "I don't even notice that I'm doing it."

Naomi took the spliff and raised her eyebrow at Effy, doubting her. "To answer your question, we are only going for three days but the point is to test out these backpacks with a full load before we go off travelling. Plus, we're camping so we need equipment."

Effy leaned down, gently rifling through the contents of Naomi's backpack. "And booze, apparently," she said, noticing the three bottles of vodka.

"We're going to need to relax after a hard day's hiking."

Effy sat down on the bed, offering Naomi the ashtray that she'd brought through with her; Naomi joined her. "And remind me why you chose to go hiking? I don't remember you ever expressing a desire to do so before."

"I just thought that if I have to tell Emily-"

"And you do."

Naomi sighed, "Yes, I know, but it's good news. Anyway, I thought that if I'm going to tell her then I should prove to her that I'm, you know, up to it first. Show that I'm fit and healthy and can look after myself."

Effy stared at Naomi as she took the spliff back, eyebrows raised as Naomi felt the power of her unrelenting gaze. "So you chose to show Emily that you're capable of doing a show at the Edinburgh Fringe for a month by spending three days climbing hills in the Peak District?"

"Okay, maybe the two things aren't directly related but I think that, subconsciously, if she sees me doing physically demanding things with ease then it'll edge her a bit closer to thinking that I can take care of myself."

"Another question," Effy said, her gaze still unflinching as she flicked away the ash at the end of the spliff, "what if it turns out that you're really no good at hiking and it edges her closer to thinking that you need stay within her field of vision twenty-four seven?"

Naomi sighed again, louder, collapsed backwards, lying on the bed and staring up at the ceiling. "Fuck Effy, five minutes ago this was a perfect plan!"

Effy collapsed back with her. "It doesn't matter, Naoms. She might struggle with it but she knows you have to go and do this."

Naomi smiled. "Yeah, for all her mothering she knows what's good for my career." Naomi turned from the ceiling to face Effy. "But you still haven't given us an answer, have you? Have you thought any more about his offer?"

"I don't know, Naomi. It sounds fun, but, well, we just had one conversation where it turned out we had the same tastes in comedy. I'm worried that this idea of me coming to Edinburgh for the month to scout new acts is just him getting a bit over-excited."

"Oh, come on. Maybe if it goes well he'll give you a permanent job; apparently he's looking for new staff. Besides, I thought that you two had a bit of a," Naomi paused, searching for the correct word, a sly grin crossing her face when she found it, "connection."

"I think I'm done sleeping with my boss. Look how that turned out last time," Effy mumbled. Naomi sat straight up, pointing at Effy and beaming.

"So you do fancy him! Oh my God, is that Effy Stonem blushing before my very eyes that I see?"

"No, I am not," Effy said as she rolled over onto her front, "and can you stop acting like a school-girl please?"

Naomi lay back down next to Effy. "Okay, but only because you know that I'm right."

"Debatable," Effy muttered, Naomi took this as a win.

"Well make up your mind soon, okay?"

"Okay," Effy said, raising her face from the place where it had been buried in the duvet.


"If you need anything at all, just call us. We'll be back late on Monday."

Effy noticed how comical Emily looked wearing her over-sized black backpack, far too big for somebody with her frame and stuffed to bursting point with unnecessary things because, as Naomi had said, they needed to test them. "I'll be fine, don't worry. Now both of you go, enjoy yourselves." Naomi hugged Effy first, then while Emily took her turn Naomi mouthed the words call him at Effy, who responded by lifting a hand from the embrace so that she could point it at Emily and mouthed tell her back. Naomi nodded and gave a thumbs-up.

After Effy had bid them both farewell she lounged on the sofa, unsure what to do with her Friday evening. She lit a spliff and watched the news (she'd actually found the habit hard to shake since her and Naomi had spent a week doing nothing but). As she was pondering the pub, there came a knock at the door. I bet they've forgotten their tent or something, Effy thought as she jogged down the stairs, and their keys apparently.

"What have you forgotten?" She sighed as she swung the door open, freezing suddenly when she realized that it was not who she had expected. "Oh, " she said, unsure what else to say before she recovered, "well you can wipe that smirk off your face for a start; round these parts that's my smirk."


"Keep up, Ems!" Naomi shouted over her shoulder. It was early on Saturday evening; they'd driven up on Friday, stayed at a hotel in Manchester for the night, then pressed on to the Peak District. Naomi had led Emily on a brutal day of walking, allowing them only a brief respite for lunch. Just when she'd seen a yawn on Emily's face she'd risen and declared that they had to keep moving if they were to reach the camping spot she'd decided on if they wanted to get their tent pitched in good time.

"In good time for what?" Emily had asked.

"Just in good time," Naomi had replied, being unable to think of a better answer.

Back in the present, Emily moaned something about her legs hurting. Naomi swiveled round, seeing Emily lagging a few metres behind she decided to wait for her to catch up so she could take her hand. "Isn't it just so much fun though, being outdoors?" Emily shot Naomi a glare that said you've never wanted to do anything like this before, why on Earth have you decided to make me endure this all of a sudden? Naomi decided to drop the subject.

A couple of hours later they were negotiating the last little peak of the day, at the top of which Naomi had planned for them to camp. She was utterly, utterly exhausted as she walked the final few steps, noticing that her legs were starting to shake, but she couldn't let Emily, who was once again a few steps behind, see. I am healthy.

Naomi reached the peak, a plateau with plenty of space for their tent. The view was truly spectacular; the freen fields of sheep and horses, the other peaks jutting out along the skyline, the villages nestled between them, but all Naomi could think about was how tired she was. I just need to lie down for a moment...

"And you see that one? That sort of zig-zag line?" Naomi was holding one of Emily's hands as they lay on their backs, she used her other to point out the place in the sky she meant.


"Yeah, I see it."

"That's Lynx. It's meant to be a cat or something, but I can only ever see that when I'm properly drunk."

"Yeah," Emily replied, "that is a bit far fetched, but I think I'm getting there on the drunk front." Emily passed Naomi the bottle of vodka and Naomi tilted her head up slightly and drank.

"Oh, and that one, over there, do you see it Ems?"

Emily squinted up at the night sky, vaguely making out the small clusters of stars Naomi was gesturing towards. "I think so, but it's very faint."

"That's Sagitta, from the Latin for arrow. You can never normally see it because, like you said it's so faint, but in theory it's visible from everywhere on Earth except the arctic circle. I almost wish it was winter then we could see the Pleiades; the seven sisters who support the heavens, being pursued by Orion, the huntsman of the stars."

Emily faced Naomi, an impressed grin on her face. "When did you learn so much about the night sky?"

Naomi shrugged, briefly taking her eyes away from the sky which she was scanning for more constellations as she did so. "When you spend some time as an unemployed stoner and your flat has a balcony you learn a few things. Useless things, but things."

"I think you're fascinating," Emily squeezed Naomi's hand as she spoke.

"Why, thank you, Emily. That's clearly why I'm marriage material: you'll never be bored with me." Naomi lay on her side, pulling Emily closer.

"You're marriage material because I love you," Emily said pulling Naomi into a kiss, running a hand through her love's ever-growing hair as she did so, feeling her warm breath. Naomi rolled over so that she was on top of Emily, pressing their bodies against each other, her hands resting under Emily's head before her put one to better use, moving her fingers gently inside the waistband of Emily's hiking trousers.

It came as a shock to her when Emily gently took hold of her wrist, forcing her to pause, and pulled away from the kiss. "I thought you were tired."

"I'm sorry about earlier. I was just so exhausted, I didn't mean to sleep and leave you to put the tent up and cook on your own."

"It's okay," Emily whispered, "but are you going to tell me what all this hiking business is about?"

Naomi feigned confusion. "Testing our backpacks."

"Naomi, how long have we been together?" Emily asked gently, Naomi still resting on top of her.

Naomi added it up in her head: the second year of college, three years after that, then the two year period they were just exiting that Naomi privately thought of as 'The Era of Cancer, Skype, and General Misery'. "Six years."

"And you think that I can't tell when there's something up?" Somewhere in the back of Naomi's mind the thought occurred that she hadn't been able to tell when cancer was up and she hadn't been able to tell when Naomi had done that thing all those years ago that had led to another period that Naomi had privately nicknamed: 'The Year of Cheating and Being an Idiot and Enormous Shame that I Don't Want to Talk About'. Fortunately for her, these thoughts kept themselves a long way from her mouth. "You didn't bring me all this way just to star-gaze did you?"

Naomi sighed and rolled herself back onto the grass, taking Emily's hand as they both lay on their sides, locking eyes. "How was it, the last time I went away?"

Emily frowned. "Difficult, but it was short and I know it's only going to start happening more."

Naomi bit her lip before she forced the words out. "Will wants me to do a show at the Edinburgh Fringe this year, after we get back from our honeymoon, for the whole of August. I said I'd check if it was okay with you first."

Emily nodded, her brow creasing as she thought, gazing away from Naomi for a few seconds. "Then you should do it." When Emily looked into her eyes again Naomi saw something she'd become all too good at spotting over the years: the early signs of Emily about to cry.

"I won't if you don't want me to," she whispered.

"No, you have to do it. Everything's going so well at the moment, you've got to keep it up." Suddenly, all signs of an imminent bout of tears disappeared. "Besides, I'll come up on the weekends, I've always fancied going to the Fringe."

Naomi wasn't sure to what degree Emily was forcing herself to be positive. She held Emily's hand and wrapped another around her waist, drawing them closer again. "Thank you. I know this is difficult."

Emily smiled and Naomi then knew then that Emily was genuinely starting to feel better about her trips away. "It's alright. Besides, I'll have Effy to keep me company."

Naomi looked away guiltily. "Maybe not."

"Why?"

"Will has asked Effy to come up for the month and scout new acts for him."

"Is that his way of asking her out?" Emily laughed.

"Probably," Naomi joined in laughing, "but according to both of them they just happen to have the same excellent tastes in comedy. You're sure you'll be okay on your own?"

Emily gave Naomi a hard stare. "Of course. I'm a grown woman and I'm healthy, Naomi, okay?"

Naomi laughed again a little at Emily's quip. "Yeah, okay."


Naomi put the key in the door as Emily unloaded the car, eager to see what Effy had decided to do, hoping it had been to come to Edinburgh. (Effy had recently become notoriously bad at answering texts and picking up calls so nothing had been heard from her over the weekend.) She also needed a good sleep; it was a Bank Holiday weekend and so, on Sunday they'd decided to give up on the hiking, book themselves into a hostel in Manchester (another bit of practice for their travelling) and have a night out. They'd been desperate to get some drugs, but had drawn a blank. Someone had told them that the whole city was having supply problems since some major player was convicted of three counts of murder and illegal possession of a firearm a little while ago. In the end they'd decided that they could manage without and had got vicously drunk on a hostel-organized pub crawl with people from the four corners of the Earth instead. Now it was early Monday evening and they were still feeling rough.

After a moment of struggling Naomi managed to turn the lock. When she pushed the door open she heard what sounded like a cat mewling and looked down to see a ginger ball of fluff scurry out of the doorway. "Ems?"

"Yes?" Emily locked the car and came over to Naomi, handing her her backpack, having missed seeing the ginger streak.

"We don't have a cat that I forgot about do we?"

Emily frowned. "No."

"Good. Or not good, not sure yet." They tread lightly through the doorway, avoiding the cat droppings as they did so, and crept up the stairs, wary. When Naomi opened the door at the top of them she didn't see a flat that she immediately recognized: empty bottles and cans left everywhere, some looking as if they had spilled their contents on the carpets. Dirty plates were stacked on the coffee table, empty baloons and laughing canisters left to lie, the furniture moved seemingly at random, the odd item of clothing hanging off chairs.

Naomi and Emily looked at each other, puzzled. "Eff?" Naomi called out, concerned.

"Hey! In the kitchen!" Effy's voice sounded unusually upbeat.

To their dismay, Naomi and Emily found the kitchen to be in an even worse state than the rest of the flat, dishes and pans stacked everywhere, except for one hob, where Effy was frying eggs wearing only a tank top and underwear, spliff in hand. She looked up from her work, grinning at her friends. "So how was hiking?"

"Not bad thanks," Emily said, "but what the fuck happened here? It looks like a bomb's gone off."

Effy shrugged, flicking ash onto a dirty plate as she did so. "Yeah, we just had a pretty crazy weekend." Effy yawned. "Don't worry, I'll clean up tomorrow." Effy offered the spliff around; Naomi shrugged and took it.

"You know there was a cat downstairs?"

"Oh shit, so we did kidnap a that cat! We were trying to remember." Effy then raised her voice, shouting into the flat. "Breakfast's ready! And I think you might need to vacate that bed now!"

"Breakfast? It's seven in the evening!"

Before Effy could respond the footsteps from somewhere else in the flat grew louder and one arm around Naomi and another around Emily. "And how are my favourite lesbians? Nice romantic weekend? Did a lot of muff get munched?"

Naomi inspected the figure between them, dressed only in boxer shorts and couldn't help but grin. "Hello, Tony. I should've known it was you. Spliff?"

Tony took the joint gratefully, then took a dirty plate onto which some eggs had been deposited from Effy. Naomi couldn't exactly put her finger on what it was, but somehow, with her brother here, Effy seemed more relaxed, as though she had some of that aura she exuded back.

"So, we're on for Edinburgh then, yeah?" Effy asked.


We'll see what Effy and Tony got up to after the next flashback. In the meantime, please do review if you have a minute. See you soon.