EDIT: Whoops, sorry about those errors. I uploaded the chapter, but for some reason the Doc Manager uploaded a previous version of the chapter. Oh well, no harm done, I suppose. I hope you all had a great Thanksgroosing. Enjoy!


EDIT EDIT: My editor Skyped me at 10:26 at night to tell me I forgot a period. I was *this* close to falling asleep. *this* close. Enjoy! (again)


"Master, we must leave."

"You think I don't know that, Fi?"

"No, like now. Like, right now."

Suddenly, the ceiling began to rumble. It cracked, revealing a sandy exterior that began caving in. The blue orb fell to the ground and crashed, and the robots were being buried in the sand that was seeping through the cracks. Groose panicked, because he didn't like the thought of being buried alive in sand. He took his sword, and using it like a pick axe, began climbing up the wall, grabbing on to the offset stones jutting out from the wall as he went. Eventually, he reached the top, where the wall and ceiling met. He began furiously pounding on it, and the ceiling chipped away, revealing a small crack of sunlight. He pounded and pounded, and eventually broke free of the sandy prison below him. He got out just as the underground structure collapsed.

"Fi, we made it!"

"Indeed, Master Groose."

Groose surveyed the land around him. To his… uh… first side was some sand. He turned. There was sand. He turned again. Sand. Once more, he turned. In the distance, he saw a tall structure, with a Hylian crest statue behind it! He ran across the desert, hoping that was his destination.


Groose had been running for a while now. He had come across a couple of structures, all looking weathered and worn, but he passed them. They didn't seem important.

It was a while before he came across a small robot.

"Uh, a…ahoy?", Groose said, terror gripping him from his newly found fear of robots. And pirates. And especially pirate robots.

"Oh, I'm not a pirate anymore. There's no need to fear. I left the crew years ago, in favor of a more peaceful life.

"So, you're a hippie."

"Call it what you like."

"Master, my sources indicate that the structure over there contains the next objective, and is Zelda's next destination."

"Quick, how do we get there?"

The robot turned it's head down, almost as if it was thinking. After a couple seconds, it popped up again. "The Mining Facility is under here, so that's your only way of getting around that wall."

Groose was speechless. Hadn't he just been in one? "No. No. I'm not going through that again."

Groose ran across the desert, trying to ignore the obvious fact that he would have to go back down into what probably was another pirate infested trap. He reached the wall, and began pounding on it. There had to be another way in, there had to be.


Fi sat in the grass, playing around with a dying plant on the ground. She had sat down to rest, knowing that this was going to take a while. Groose pushed another mine cart up to the wall.

"Master, why don't we just go through the dungeon?"

"No, there's no way I'm going through anything else with pirates."

"Well, then what are you going to do?"

Groose finished lining up the mine carts in a neatly stacked stair case. He clapped his hands free of dust and grit, and looked back at his companion, sitting carefree in the sand.

"What I have here is a simple staircase. I just climb up these, and I'm over."

Fi stared at his mine cart contraption. He couldn't be that stupid, could he?

Groose climb up on the first mine cart. Then the second. Then the third. This was a piece of cake. Well, it was until the carts, still on wheels, began to roll away from the wall. Groose fell to the ground with a soft thud and a spray of sand.


"Alright, plan B."

Groose reviewed his plan over one last time before execution. He push the mine cart really fast, and then jump in. He would hit the bomb flower laying on the ground with his sword, and if timed right, it would propel him up and forward, sending him flying over the wall. It was foolproof!

He began pushing the cart as fast as he could. Faster, and faster still! He hopped in the cart, and swung his sword at the bomb. The bomb lit, right as planned. This might actually work! The cart went over it, and the bomb exploded. Instead of sending the cart over the wall, it merely flipped over, landing Groose with a mouth full of sand and a mine cart on his head.


Groose finished tying down the cactus. This would work, for sure. He just had to get on, and cut the rope. It was a two-step plan, and would get him over the wall for sure.

He didn't get even get part one accomplished. He had overlooked one detail; sitting on a cactus would hurt. He tried to sit down, but immediately leapt back up in pain. He kicked the rope in confusion, releasing the cactus, which came back and smacked him in the face. As Groose doubled over in pain on the ground, the cactus flew back, and forward again. As it slingshotted back, the base snapped, and the cactus landed on Groose.


Groose was done fooling around. This was getting a bit ridiculous. This next plan would work for sure. Groose had found a long pole lying around near one of the abandoned shed-things, and was going to vault over the wall.

He stood back, took a deep breath, and began running. He struck the pole down in the ground, and it began to give way. Groose was being lifter, higher and higher. Fi looked up from the ground. She was astonished. He might actually do it! Groose looked down at her, and stuck his tongue out.

Fi chuckled, and watched Groose smash into the wall. He was almost over. But not quite.


"Dammit Fi, I give up. This is too hard. Even for me. And that's saying something."

Groose walked over to the wall, and pounded his fist in defeat. There was a loud crumbling noise, as Groose watched his ever looming obstacle disintegrate before his eyes.

"That was it? That's all I had to do?"

"Well, after your last mishap, it probably weakened the wall to a point that it could be broken like that with your fist."

"Damn."