Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of the characters in it.
XI.
- Just Kakashi -
It wasn't the pour of the rain outside that woke her up, it was actually a far more casual and not that unexpected reason, namely the ache of her muscles. Her whole body had transformed into one aching entity. But as soon as she opened her eyes, the pain was forgotten in an instant.
With the slowest movement, Sakura shifted until she laid on her back and set herself up to watch. What a pleasant surprise, he wasn't one of those early rising pedants after all. Sure, soldiers had to follow a regime of some kind but when not on duty, it seems everyone turned back to their real, non-robotized self. Strange, she was almost certain that he would be gone by the time she wakes up. But then again, her biological clock was appointed to wake her up early. Here it was, she had been given a chance to catch a glimpse, the answer of a previously opened question. That was what he looked like without his hatred. The sorrow, however, couldn't be erased. She understood that fact. You can only find and use distractions to divert your attention from it.
Heart fluttering, Sakura couldn't stop herself from smiling. It was quite the drastic change. Only a few days ago he glared at her and refused to have any kind of contact. Now, although still in a calm sleep, he held on her waist, their bodies as close as they could get. Sakura feared that if she moved more he'll wake up and the magic will be spoiled. Accordingly, she wouldn't be able to relish on the view as it was now.
Her cheeks had shaded to coral red only after a minute of it.
His skin radiated enough warmth to lull her back to sleep but instead, she just closed her eyes and leaned on his forehead gently. Rewinding frames from last night, she almost felt the same touch, the same taste. How did she not see through earlier? Perhaps... because he made it so hard for people to love him. She finally grew to understand the language he spoke, previously not aware that she's been too loud to hear what he was saying.
He breathed in a slow and quiet rhythm but the pattern broke and she knew he had woken up, or almost woken up because he took a deeper breath, his grip around her tightening. Sakura bit her lip, the smile creeping on her lips as he rested his head in the curve of her neck.
She couldn't resist the urge and turned enough to face him, noses touching.
"Stop moving." He growled in a low voice, only making her smile widen.
"Stop sleeping." She teased in a whisper.
"Shut up."
"I'm serious." Sakura chuckled. "I'll be forced to lay here for ten more hours if you fall asleep again."
"Fine." Sasuke furrowed, about to push her away but Sakura didn't let him, attaching anew.
"I was joking." She gave him a sad smile once his eyes opened. "You can sleep, I'll keep it quiet."
Sasuke looked at her silently. There was heavy confusion in his eyes as if her behavior was out of every existent logic he was acquainted with. It only deepened with every second and by the time she had decided to kiss him it turned into general bewilderment.
"What's wrong?" Sakura breathed out, slowly shifting over him.
Their kiss just deepened when Sasuke exchanged their places abruptly, pinning her hands.
"Don't." He peered into her eyes with anger.
Sakura slightly tilted her head in wonder.
"Why?"
One thing was for certain, he wasn't prepared for that question and this time the darkness couldn't hide that fact. Even if he was prepared, his eyes gave away that the answer was far more complicated to just form it into a single sentence. So he quickly found an escape.
"Because I say so." Sasuke snapped, moving away from her.
Sakura was at a loss. What did she do wrong, again?
He uncovered from the sheets and started dressing up while she heaved up to a sitting position. She wanted to say something but couldn't find the words. Words didn't quite work with him, she learned her lesson well. That state... he was unreachable once again. Unable to comprehend how she had breached through the defenses last night, Sakura wrinkled at him. It was as if he showed her the truth and then condemned it as a lie. That was inhuman, what he did.
"Sasuke," She whispered, reaching for his hand but he recoiled as if her touch burned him.
"Don't try..." He fumed, glaring at her, "to make me soft."
"What's so wrong with soft?" Sakura raised her intonation, baffled at his obstinacy.
"Soft is weak."
He stood up, picking up his shirt from the floor in the process.
"I don't mean to-"
"Stay away from me." Sasuke cut her off masterfully and looked away.
He wouldn't admit it, then. That he was fully subservient to her wish because he needed her. Good, she didn't need a vocal confirmation because she remembered, to the detail. How could he still claim that he despised her when her body was fused with his just a few hours ago and she felt everything. There was no malevolence in his touch, not a single drop. Which proved his current behavior as falsified and it pained her to know that fact.
Sakura swallowed down the bitterness that was now rising inside of her. It was getting worse with every second so she figured her presence was no longer required. She got out of the bed and dressed up slowly, gathering her things. In the process, her thoughts turned against her and tried to come up with an explanation. Normal human beings didn't act like that, did they? How did this one even succeed in making its way into her heart? Though, it was rather... through her heart.
When she finally stopped in front of him, her eyes were blurred.
"Am I a threat to you? Is that why you're so afraid?" Her voice trembled, fingers reaching for his face but he averted, refusing to look at her.
"Leave my house."
Sakura was about to reconcile with the situation, starting to leave, when his voice made her stop once again.
"Make sure no one sees you."
A mirthless laugh wrested out of her as she left his room and headed straight out.
Make sure no one sees you?
What was she, a prostitute? Was that what he said in the mornings? To all the wretched souls that have had the misfortune, or she would rather call it damnation send from the heavens, a divine punishment, to end up entangled in his deceiving charm and phony touch. God knew how many have fallen to his trap and have taken delight in it. Just as she did.
Sakura slammed the door to her car and stared at the air in front of her with pure rage. Anger obsessed her, so uncontrollable and uncontainable that tears fell from her eyes, despite her want to break or destroy something.
What a demonstration of grand stupidity.
Fine.
If he wanted to play dirty, so be it. She didn't have to involve herself into his dramatic performances but she did, for his own good. And he didn't appreciate that.
She heaved a deep sigh, passing a hand over her eyes in order to wipe away the tears that fell from them. Another thought crept into her mind as the only consolation she could find among the ice desolation he left her in. He could have her crying at the other side of his expensive bed all night but he didn't. At least she could be certain that he understood what impact had his actions on her and used it as a way to show dominance. She was the one who needed him, not the other way around.
As if... she was the one thinking straight from both of them.
Sakura put on her safety belt.
Let's see who needed who, in the end.
The day prolonged as she took care of a patient after a patient without taking any liking in it, as she previously did. The anger was still lingering within her, keeping her restless at all times. She couldn't even sit on her chair for more than a few minutes. The antagonism of what should be and it was in her heart ripped her apart. He had taken the shape of everything she most despised in a person and right when her thoughts went as far as to administer the punishment he deserved, her heart shrunk with pain, replacing her fervor with bitterness. She had never gotten the chance to hear her own name spoken in such way and her mind kept reminding her of the occurrence. His voice was branded on her and it frustrated her that her most blazing wrath was not able to erase it.
"What's up?" Ino dashed in, startling her as always.
"Stop doing that." Sakura fumed, exhaling in exasperation. "Learn some manners, will you?"
Ino leaned on her desk, raising a brow. Her gaze quickly fell on a small opened up box in particular, one that rested next to Sakura's elbow.
"These are really bad for your health." Ino shared, in the most casual tone. "I mean... really bad. They completely mess you up. You better use the normal birth control ones next time."
Sakura dragged the box and put it in her pocket without raising her eyes off the documents in front of her. Ino gave her an inquisitive look as she sat on the desk and leaned in order to get her friend's attention. After Sakura appeared uninterested in her comical equilibrist-like movements, she laid herself completely, forcing Sakura to lean back in her chair with a tired expression.
"I'm not gonna interrogate you, don't give me that face." Ino leaned on her palm with a smirk.
"Why don't you get off my desk and leave me to work? I promised these to Tsunade until the end of the day."
"Don't leave me in the dark," Ino warned. "Alright. Let's use the good old decimal system. One to ten?"
Sakura gave out a tormented sigh, hands covering her face for a moment.
"Do you want the truth?" She mumbled.
"Of course I want the truth."
Hands down, Sakura took a deep breath and met Ino's eyes.
"I think I might have to invent a new scale for this one."
"What you mean?" Ino straightened up a bit, furrowing. "In a good way or a bad way?"
"I mean, I could've given him a solid twelve if he didn't try to kill me at the beginning."
"I knew it!" Ino jumped off the desk. "I knew it."
"You better get lost. Now." Sakura barely finished the sentence when her phone rang and she waved at Ino to get lost.
"Stop yelling." Sakura scolded as she picked up.
Ino mouthed a silent I'll come back before leaving the office with the happiest face.
"The office of Doctor Haruno, how can I help?"
The pause made Sakura drag the receiver and look at it for a second, making sure there wasn't anything wrong with it.
"Fix my life."
"Well, you have found the right place, sir." Sakura couldn't help but chuckle at the unstudied tone, despite the fact that the conversation was led by two strangers so far.
"Oh, I always do."
There was a heavy undertone in that remark and Sakura leaned back in her chair. The humor was the glaze. There were a lot of layers underneath. She loved this kind of people, they were simultaneously tough opponents and at the same time complicated, in an intriguing way.
"Alright. You must be one of these Elite Soldiers."
"Good thinking. Keep it up."
"Is that a confirmation?"
"You are smart enough to reach the answer without hints. I want to hear the process."
"Do we know each other? "
"No."
"So you are an Elite Soldier?"
A puff of amusement took the place of a usual reply this time and Sakura furrowed.
"Is that a test?"
"Think of it as a game."
"I haven't heard your voice before." She thought out loud. "I haven't met you."
"Your first thought was that I'm an Elite Soldier. Why?"
"Because..." Sakura narrowed eyes. "The way you talk."
"The way I talk?"
"Yes." She drawled. "Like you know things. You are an Elite Soldier, aren't you?"
This time a sincere laughter rang out from the other side and Sakura was even more confused.
"Wouldn't be a game if I tell you."
"Do you have a name, sir?"
"Do you have... a minute?"
"Depends."
"If you do, feel free to come. I'm sitting in the restaurant across your hospital."
He hung up but Sakura was, mildly said, bemused. That was something entirely different from what she's heard. Curiosity started gnawing at her in the moment she placed the receiver back in its place. Could be a trap but didn't sound much like it. If it was, it wouldn't have been so cordial.
Sakura looked at her watch and bit her lower lip.
Allowing herself a break now wasn't the best idea but a little distraction could turn out great for her overburdened mind. Why not give it a try?
In the moment she neared the sitting places, her body nailed in place. Thankfully, she wasn't the only one astounded because at least a dozen people had their eyes on the man that stood upright next to a table with his hands in the back. Multiple questions rose inside of her as she tilted her head, scrutinizing the strange view. Did he really have to stand like that, intimidating the citizens with his pompous appearance? Moreover, there was a mask hiding half of his face, along with a dark band that covered his left eye. As if it couldn't get any more mysterious than that. At least one of the questions was answered, he was, without a doubt, from the military. The posture gave him away. The uniform was far more striking, though. Especially the row of three medals and... the insignia.
Sakura scoffed.
Close but not close enough. Four lines and a star. Sasuke had three on his. How did it not cross her mind earlier?
She walked to him slowly and stopped at a safe distance, feeling his gaze on her.
"Are you following me, sir?"
"If you feel followed, then I assume you've committed a crime of which I don't wanna know." He paused. "I just wanted a meeting."
"You made it sound far more complicated on the phone... Captain."
The skin around his only visible eye slightly wrinkled, enough to let her know he was smiling.
"Correct." He nodded. "But please do not refer to me with the title."
"I'd love to have a name then." Sakura shrugged.
"Hatake Kakashi. Pleased to finally meet you."
"Haruno Sakura." She slowed down vastly at the end because he didn't shake her hand, as she had prepared to, but instead held it above his. Interesting. "Finally?"
"Yes." He went to her side and pulled the chair. "I'd like to discuss the matter while sitting. If you don't mind."
If he kept using medieval tricks, she could actually sink into the ground. The shiny armor was at hand, what was next, a carriage?
"Thank you." She murmured, sitting down.
Once he sat across her, his hands intertwined on the table and for a moment he just looked at her.
"Did anyone tell you you have the loveliest hair?"
Sakura almost burst into laughter but the biting of her lip stopped her from doing so.
"Is that why you asked for a meeting? So that you can make fun of me?" A game smile appeared on Sakura's lips.
"I was being completely honest." Kakashi's expression didn't change and Sakura's smile faded right away.
"Oh. Forgive me." Her eyes fell down as she felt the heat rising to her cheeks. "No, no one has ever told me that. Everyone thinks it's funny."
"It's not." He assured her.
"I see you suffer from melanin degradation too." She was about to save that observation to herself but couldn't help it, now, as he opened the subject. His silvery hair was way too salient for it to be natural. As much as she could see, he was far too young to have his hair completely faded to that color.
"Yeah." He sighed. "But let's not talk about me, I'm here to talk about you."
"I only..." She intervened and he waited out to hear the end of her sentence before continuing. "Wish to see your face. I like to be able to look at people when I'm talking with them."
For the first time, she caught a glimpse of confusion in him. Unlike anyone she had ever met, he was quite expressive, even when he didn't realize it.
"Is that a problem?" She slightly tilted her head.
"It might be, for you." He replied, matter-of-factly, which brought a wide smile on Sakura's face.
"Quite ambiguous." Was he flirting? Sakura couldn't believe it. It's been... five minutes since they met. "Why is that?"
"I don't usually take these off." Speaking word by word, he leaned back in his chair.
"Would you make an exception? Only this time." Sakura tried to keep a calm intonation but actually, curiosity had gotten the best of her. Why would he hide his face like that?
The way he stared at her hinted that what she wished for was probably against his will but in the end, he heaved a heavy sigh and reached to lower his mask.
"All of it," Sakura ordered, the smile still creeping on her lips.
Kakashi obeyed and, although reluctantly, took the band off, revealing a vertical scar that slashed through the most part of his left side. What concerned more was his left eye, covered with a pallid veil.
"Does that satisfy you?" He looked at her, inquiring.
Her expression was withering with every second until her eyes appeared slightly dimmed.
"I am so sorry." Sakura wrinkled, trying to contain the self-loathing that swelled in her. "I had no idea."
"People are usually repelled by scars so I spare them the inconvenience of having to look at one all the time when I'm-"
"I am not repelled by scars." Sakura raised her eyes to his, cutting him off. "I don't mind them at all."
Kakashi smiled at her, a smile of gratitude. Just now she was able to see his features as a whole. There was something very attractive in him but his beauty wasn't intrusive or one that frightened with complete lack of flaws, it was rather... soft. Perhaps that was where the charm came from. He surely had passed his thirties, the confidence along with the peace of mind he obviously acquired was in no way achievable for any of her coevals.
"Can you see anything?" She whispered, certain that he'll understand what she referred to.
"I wouldn't say no but it's not exactly yes either."
"I understand."
"So. Now that I can talk freely, I should start with my gratitude for you. You've taken care of my First Lieutenant and he's alive because of you."
The color in Sakura's face disappeared with the mention of him.
"Something wrong?" Kakashi raised a brow.
"No. Of course, not."
He narrowed eyes at her, suspicious.
"I must... apologize, on his behalf."
Sakura waited out to see what he was going to say, although her mind was already in a turmoil.
"Three days ago, I assigned my First Lieutenant on a mission. I wouldn't call it mission because it was rather a request." Kakashi made a pause, expecting external outbursts but when he got none, decided to continue. "He was supposed to measure your abilities and draw a conclusion, in the end. Whether you're capable for the position."
"Yeah, that didn't end well. Tell your First Lieutenant to watch his tongue next time." Sakura rested her elbows on the table.
"I understand he wasn't as delicate as I hoped he would be," Kakashi muttered. " Should've seen it coming."
"May I ask what this is about? What position?"
"I'd like to have you."
Sakura fixed her eyes on him in surprise.
"In my team, that is." Kakashi hurried to add, although judging from his composed state that last mistake was not quite a mistake.
"In your team?" Sakura repeated slowly, generally confused. "Me? I'm a doctor."
"Exactly."
"But... I'm not trained to be a... a field medic." She scoffed. "This is absurd."
"It's up to you. I'll provide you with the needed information. You will be trained and ready by the time we leave."
Sakura caught her head in hands. That was way too great of decision for one to make on a table, in the break. Field medic? Field... medic? She was about to go to an unfamiliar place, where the chances of survival dropped to the minimum and she was supposed to save lives in these conditions.
But then again, if she was wanted in a team of Elite Soldiers, then there was nobody else he could take. Perhaps the matters were pressing and he was desperate.
"What happens if I accept?" Sakura asked, meeting his searching gaze.
"You will start the training immediately. I wouldn't be able to be at your service but I'll get someone to train you. I'm sure Naruto would love to help."
"And?"
"You have the medical knowledge. We'll give you the field one."
"Meaning I'll have to become a soldier," Sakura added to his sentence.
Kakashi nodded.
Holding a gun. Firing with a gun. Taking away a life... if she has to. All these things she wanted to avoid now were brought down on her. Why now and why her?
"And why did you fix on me, Captain?" Sakura tucked aside her intrusive thoughts, promising to let them take over after she goes back home.
"Just Kakashi."
"I can quote," Sakura continued, passing by his words. "I don't think you're even near to good enough. You are a disaster."
"Between you and me," Kakashi sighed. "He was against taking new medics when I shared with him the idea. I persuaded him, in the end, but he wasn't particularly happy about it. When I shared it with Naruto..."
"What?" Sakura incited him to finish.
She didn't particularly like how casually he shared the way three men have discussed her without her even knowing. Did they think stalking and following was something perfectly regular? Because the one in front of her sure sounded like it. If she didn't know they were Konoha's Special Forces she would've called the police before even nearing that table.
"He suggested we take you. And a woman with the name Yamanaka Ino."
"So I'm practically rejected by your First Lieutenant but your Second wants me."
"Correct."
"Whose opinion weighs more?"
"Mine." Kakashi smiled warmly.
"And if I don't want to join? What then?"
"I'll have to turn my back on a strong inner conviction."
Sakura raised a brow.
"I have this feeling, that you are the perfect addition for me. I mean, for my team."
Sakura couldn't help but laugh out loud. It wouldn't have been that funny if he didn't say everything in the same tone. Kakashi pulled out a piece of paper from his pocket and started searching for a pen but Sakura was faster and provided him with one from her bag.
"Take my number." He wrote down the numbers and handed the note to her, along with the pen.
"Thank you."
"Think about it and... let me know what would your decision be."
"Of course." Sakura drawled, glancing at her watch. "I'm afraid I have to go."
"Leaving already?" Kakashi almost accused her. "Am I that bad?"
Sakura stood up, a smirk on her lips.
"I have my duty, sir. Would be disgraceful to refuse help to a human being just because I've been busy drinking tea with a stranger."
"I take it you don't drink coffee, then," Kakashi commented, his eyes inspecting her body most insolently.
"Have a good day, Captain."
"Kakashi."
"I'll let you know what I've decided." Sakura nodded at him and turned to leave, completely sure that his eyes were on her long after they parted.
A/N: Ok, so. Captains usually lead companies (80-150) and Lieutenants lead platoons (15-30). We assume Sasuke is leading the Elite-Soldier-Platoon but Kakashi's with the higher authority. I'm not sure Captains stick with one team for long (the way I write it) and I'm positive this is not how things work but you guys will forgive that unauthentic little detail. I kinda messed up the rankings. If we just accept that in my AU Kakashi's some kind of a special Captain that only takes care of the Special Forces and is not concerned with hundred more units, everything will be fine. I had one job.
Apart from that, thank you for reading! I'll be back as soon as I can. This chapter is quite dialogue-heavy and I hope people don't mind that. Also, there's this weird thing goin' on in my family, both my grandma and mom have married men that are at least 10 years older than them (accordingly 11 and 13) so don't blame me for shipping KakaSaku. It's in my blood. XD Anyway, they're a nice combination in my opinion.
Thanks for the compliments, TheOrchestra Dork, I'm trying to get Sakura as close to the canon as I can. As for Sasuke, he's even making me mad lol. But that's him. Pouting and shouting 'till the end. As I sat and thought about him one day, I realized he's that type of person that wants to achieve everything on their own and do not accept the help of others, which is probably one of the things that keep him from Sakura. She wants to help and that's natural for her but he sees that as humiliation, that's what I think. He has it tough, though, and Sakura knows that. Hope you'll like some witty Kakashi, for a change.
Yes, I do, Riela! I'm a newbie-fan because I've started listening to them about three months ago but I love them. Every single song. But I think Walk Alone's my fav for now. Although Winter quite fits SasuSaku, too haha Glad you liked the chapter.
Your words mean so much to me, Sakurabeam. *blushes* Thanks for leaving a review like that, warmed my heart and made me smile. Hope you'll like the next chapters, too.
Goodness, ViridianUhiha, I was just about to publish and you write a review. You people are showering me with love here and I don't even deserve it. Thank you for complimenting me on keeping him in character! I always, always fear I'll mess him up and that's the reason I write so slowly. I literally think over everything he says and does. Sakura is not that far from me as a mindset and she's way easier. Anyway! I hope you'll be happy with the next chapter.
