ARGH! You guys! I am SO sorry I haven't updated in over a year! There's no excuse for it. Real life was kicking my ass, and I had so many unfinished chapters of both old and new fics, it was hard to motivate myself to fill in the gaps so I could post them. Also, I'm a huge perfectionist, so I always feel the need to proofread my chapters, which is hard to do for me sometimes. Anyway, rest assured that I'll have lots more updates around the corner (Adam and Lawrence forever, damn it! :D), so look forward to those. :) Thank you so much for sticking with me this long, everyone!
I hope this chapter is okay. This fic is almost finished, and I'm not sure if there will be any more sex scenes in it. ...Wait! Don't go! XD There'll be some adorable angst in the next chapter, so I'm sure you'll all love that. I know I do. ;)
11. The Future
Lawrence forced himself to keep still - not squirm, not arch; just lie there - as Adam's fingers slowly ran across the base of his head. His other hand, he slowly ran up the older man's chest, across his neck, until he finally let it settle on his flaming cheek. Lawrence barely noticed.
As Adam delivered another long, gratifying stroke down his lover's penis, Lawrence gave out a long, hoarse moan of blissful pleasure, pressing his body hard down into the bed to stop himself from arching up against the photographer. Adam gave a relaxed, almost lazy nip against Lawrence's neck and muttered, "Shut up," while still, mercifully, jerking him off.
Lawrence clenched his teeth and forced himself to obey, even though his ears were roaring and his eyes were stinging, and his body was begging silently to struggle against Adam's, simply because the damned kid was taking so long to satisfy it.
Adam continued kissing and sucking along his lover's collarbone, not overenthusiastically, since he himself had just orgasmed minutes ago and thus he was not in an overly energetic mood. Lawrence closed his watering eyes and began to shudder, violently, as his own climax began to reach him more quickly.
Adam barely seemed to notice. He just kept up with the handjob, almost too bored to enjoy Lawrence's powerlessness.
Lawrence gasped, Adam's rules left him temporarily, and he gripped his shoulder, buried his nails in his skin and whimpered like a child when he came into Adam's hand.
Adam rolled down from him. His hand was soiled, Lawrence thought he wiped it off on the sheets, but he couldn't really tell. His head was only barely above the water.
But he did feel Adam laying his head on his shoulder, an arm coiling around his waist and a final kiss being planted on his neck, and he took this as an opportunity to put his own arm around Adam's back, in another moment of redemption.
That was as close to Adam as he got now days.
You know you have a twisted picture of the reality when you wake up and are happy that no one has tied you to the bedpost.
Lawrence moaned when the bruises on his wrists were brought to his attention. He subconsciously moved his hand to those places on his arm, the places that throbbed angrily and where the rope burns shone in alarmingly purple and red.
Ah, well. At least he wasn't tied up.
Adam wasn't next to him. But for once, Lawrence wasn't worried that he'd killed himself. He knew Adam wouldn't do that. What made him worried was the fact that he didn't know what would happen. Not to him. And not to Adam.
And that was the first time that had ever happened. Lawrence had had his whole life spelled out for him. Always. He would be a doctor, he would get married to a beautiful, blonde woman, he wouldhave a baby. Period.
But now, he was lost, and not even Adam was there to support him.
The second Lawrence thought that, Adam walked in the bedroom door. He wore a tattered robe. His face was blank, and he had a bottle of disinfectant and a few cotton balls in his hand.
He pretended not to see Lawrence's confused expression when he sat down in front of him and placed the bottle next to him.
"Sit up," he said in a clipped tone.
Lawrence was too tired and confused to disobey. When he sat up, Adam pulled his one hand closer, put some disinfectant on one of the cotton balls, and brought it to the stinging wound on his lover's wrist.
Lawrence gave a slight hiss of pain when the burning sensation of the creamy-like substance rubbed up against his raw skin. Adam ignored this and continued padding the wound, almost gently.
Lawrence silently cursed himself for his weakness. He was a doctor, after all; he spread this kind of stuff onto patients almost every day. Well, not this stuff, exactly, but still things that would sting just as much as what Adam was using now. The older man almost smiled when he saw the photographer reach for a band-aid on his nightstand, then place it clumsily against the now-cleaned wound.
Having done that, Adam began to tend to the other hand, which was far more severely cut for some reason. Lawrence managed to keep silent when Adam rubbed some more disinfectant against his other wrist, but it still hurt. Really, someone had to invent a kind of antiseptic that didn't sting. Thinking that this would help to break the ice somewhat, Lawrence said this out loud to Adam, who smiled slightly.
"Well, you're the doctor, aren't you?" he quipped, still running his cotton ball against the angry marks on his lover's hand. "Why don't you invent it?"
Lawrence gave a small smile of relief at this and almost laughed out loud.
"I dunno. I'm too lazy, I suppose. Ow! Fuck!"
He let out the last two words as violent exclamations. Adam's wandering healing hands - or more specifically, the cotton that they held - had just brushed against a particularly sensitive patch of skin on his wrist.
Adam grinned and tightened his grip on Lawrence's wrist. In some way, he seemed to think of Lawrence like a stupid little boy who had tried to pull the hand out of his grasp, and it annoyed him. Lawrence was used to Adam being the child of the two of them.
"Sissy," Adam said mockingly and looked at the cleansed wound with furrowed brows. "You're the sure proof that all great men are raised like mama's boys."
Lawrence blushed weakly.
"Stop it. It doeshurt."
Adam slowly shook his head and threw the cotton ball aside.
"We both know you've felt pain that's a hundred times worse than this, Lawrence," he said quietly and finally looked up at him.
And for a second, everything came back to Lawrence. It had never truly left him. But for a second, it all came back so strongly that he almost felt the saw move over his ankle.
Allison's voice in the phone. The light flowing down from the fluorescent lights. Zep's eyes staring down on him.
Adam.
Adam put, without too much care, another band-aid on Lawrence's wrist. Then, he got up, Lawrence's gaze following every move he made, and it was possible that he was pale, that his eyes were widened and that his mouth slowly opened and closed, but he didn't know, didn't care.
Adam smiled.
He actually smiled. And his one hand was laid on Lawrence's cheek with a tenderness that he'd never felt from him before, not even before he fucked everything up, crushed everything under the foot of his own perfection.
"I will never be able to forgive you," Adam said slowly. "But I think I'll be able to stop being mad at you."
He paused. Lawrence didn't know if this should make him sad or happy, until Adam opened his mouth and spoke up again.
And before Lawrence actually managed to show any direct reaction to these words, Adam had leaned down, stroked his bangs aside and placed a gentle kiss on his forehead.
And then he was gone, leaving Lawrence alone in the room again.
AW! Adam, you're so sweet, even when you're sadistic. XD Anyway, please R&R, everyone! ...That is, if you didn't think I was dead. ;)
