At long last, I have another chapter to post! It just took a while for my beta to get to it. I may have overloaded her with multiple updates for almost every fic I have going. Whoops. Well, this chapter is very short comparatively and a bit more filler than anything. There is a purpose to it, but it's more Jarred needs to hit rock bottom and he's on his way there with the way he's acting. And don't worry, he'll get over himself soon enough. The next update should be much sooner than this one was, either way. Don't forget to leave me a review!


September 21, 267

Noon

I hate my life. I hate what's happening to me. It's just not fair.

So far, things have only gone poorly. I have a throbbing headache, I got knocked out of bed by the fuzzy bed hog in the middle of the night, I've been rained on, everyone's been avoiding me, and nothing has gone right.

I hate my life. What did I do to deserve this? I didn't do anything wrong of such a magnitude to possibly deserve this. Not even my fighting with Rosto is that bad. Okay, maybe I have gotten a little out of hand. But I didn't deserve this. I didn't deserve last night.

I'm going to go find something else to do. Something that will preferably get rid of my headache…

Late Afternoon

Things are still not going well. I've been trying to get rid of a headache with little success. And I've been trying to find any instance of me acting like I would do anything the Dogs seem to think I would. I am empty handed after that search. I cannot figure out for the life of me why someone would accuse me of all people of turning Rat.

I think it has been pretty clear that I have had no interest in becoming like my father. Rosto has not been anything I have wanted to be no matter how long it has been. I never wanted to be a Rat. I never wanted anything to do with the Rogue.

At this point, the only thing I can think of is that it might be that someone is trying to get rid of me. That could mean many things. It could mean that there is someone inside the Dogs that is involved in the case that Tay and Rinny are working on right now. But why target me? Why not take out one of them? That wouldn't be that hard to do. Admittedly it was probably easier to get me out of the investigation and out of the Dogs in general because of my blood connection to the Rogue. Though, how they could pull it off with me being the son of the Terrier is beyond me.

Wait, no. That doesn't work. It doesn't help that my head is hurting, I suppose. Actually, that's making it harder to think. Today is just not my day. Then again, it doesn't seem like any day lately has been my day. At all.

I feel like all I'm thinking about is this. It's like an obsession that I can't break. It's been less than a day since I was put on probation and I can't stand it. I'm all jumpy and I can't even think straight. That would mainly be because of my head, but still. The only thing I can think about is why I'm stuck here. Rosto, people thinking that I will be just like him, and so on. I just cannot stop thinking about it and it is starting to drive me insane.

There is something seriously wrong here and I have no clue what it could possibly be. It's driving me crazy. I fell like it's right in front of me and I'm just not seeing it. I'm so frustrated right now and I cannot even figure out why.

Night

I am so bored. My headache is gone, which is good, but I don't have anything to do. I haven't seen Ma all day and I know she's already gone off to watch. So, I'm stuck here. And Rosto's downstairs having a grand old time with Aniki and the Court of the Rogue. It's not even his court again and he's as pleased as a cat that caught a mouse. Or Pounce when he's gotten into something he knows he shouldn't have and that Ma is going to be mad at him for sure.

So, I can't go downstairs and I have no one to talk to. Lovely. Piper won't even look at me right now. I'm surprised she slept in the bed with me last night at this point.

Have I said before that I hate my life? Well, I'm saying it again.

Bored. Ugh.


September 22, 267

Morning

I'm still bored. It hasn't gotten any better overnight. I think everyone is mad at me. Particularly because they haven't spoken to me since the night before last. What did I do wrong? It's not like I did anything un…wait, no. I did do something. Oops.

Now that I think about it-

Afternoon

I'm going to hurt Saul one of these days. He's almost as annoying as Lani's little brothers. Well, today he is. That would probably be because I'm not in the mood to be messed with today.

He decided to stop by and we ended up talking a bit. It wasn't much since he had to run off and do things for his father while they're in town, but still. I'm glad I got to see him at least. We didn't talk about anything of any importance, really, or I would write it down.

Actually, I don't even need to write anything down. I'm not a Dog anymore, so why should I?

Night

I changed my mind again. I've kind of become attached to these journals. It keeps me entertained and it does get the stress out. And it gives me a place to vent.

It took until dinner for Ma to talk to me. She said she was sorry for being busy today and yesterday, but that we were going to make my birthday enjoyable rather than as bad as the last few days. I hope she's right.

It turns out that it wasn't that they weren't talking to me, actually. It was just that they were all super busy with something. That would be things for tomorrow most likely.

My problem has still not been solved. I'm still bored out of my mind because everyone is busy.

I need to stop complaining. I'm doing it again. It's really rather annoying…


Posted 6/21/11