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"Naruto"-Normal speaking

'Naruto'-Normal thought

"Naruto"-Naruto/clones communicating telepathically/radio chat

'Naruto'-Kyuubi/greater being thinking/speaking from mindscape

"Naruto"-Antharos thinking/speaking from mindscape

'naruto'-Varsee thinking/speaking from mindscape

"Naruto"-Zechs thinking/speaking from mindscape

"NARUTO"-Xenos thinking/speaking from mindscape

'nARUTO'- Drak thinking/speaking from mindscape

Chapter XI

Let The Buyer Beware


'It's about fricking time' Naruto thought to himself as Team 7 walked inside the Hokage Tower and the mission room.

D-rank missions may have been easy money, but he could just have his clones do them. They may have been easy but they were boring as hell. No challenge either. He knew that Sasuke and Sakura would be of similar opinion too. I mean, how can gardening be considered ninja training? He'd have to have a serious talk to Sarutobi about their academy training. I mean, weren't they pretty much supposed to be hired mercenaries? Home grown killing machines? He was pretty sure that that was the general criteria for a shinobi. So why exactly were they doing crap like this? Naruto could understand giving D-ranks to academy students, but actual ninja? But oh well. It wasn't like griping to himself would help any.

Though it was satisfying to know that Kakashi was of a similar opinion. At least he wasn't alone in this boat. According to Kakashi, most of his peers thought the same way.

Speaking of said man, the lazy jounin was eyeing the newest addition to Naruto's arsenal.

"Starting to try kenjutsu Naruto? I didn't think you'd be in to that"

"What makes you say that? We both know that my taijutsu sucks. So I thought I'd try something else"

"True. But kenjutsu is thought by many to be far harder to master then taijutsu. Most consider it to be an advanced version of taijutsu. If your taijutsu is so bad, do you really think you'll have better luck with something more advanced?"

"You do have a point sensei, but think about it this way. Most of the people who have said that have been perfectly capable taijutsu users. I also read something interesting in the Konoha library. According to a study I read about, almost all of the renowned kenjutsu masters in the world, the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist especially, had no real aptitude for taijutsu, hence why they turned to kenjutsu and found incredible skill with it. I thought the same might apply to me, and if nothing else, it was worth a shot"

Now that was an interesting point, Kakashi mused. 'Hmm. I knew Hayate was no good at taijutsu when he first started, and he's still nowhere near as good at it as most jounin, but I didn't know that it was true for others…'

"Well, I suppose you do have a point there" Kakashi relented. He had learned a while back that Naruto had a talent for making a convincing argument, as well as showing shrewd negotiation skills. Kakashi remembered how many times he had used those skills to great extent on Sasuke, Sakura, and even himself a few times. Logic pwnage indeed.

In the last few weeks, his team had progressed greatly in skill, but there was still something missing. The teamwork. Sasuke seemed to not believe in the concept of teamwork at all, and Sakura was too infatuated with him to take her training seriously. Naruto was a little better off, as Kakashi could tell that he would at least try to work together with them, but they both seemed to hate him so that didn't work either. So Kakashi had come up with a potential solution.

Give them a 'trial by fire' so to speak.

Show them the real, dark side of the shinobi world. If they were in real, live fire situations, they would hopefully see the light. And if anything went wrong, he and Naruto would be there to bail them out. Naruto was not an issue.

The blonde had progressed with incredible speed in the past few weeks, thanks in no small part to his kage bunshin. Kakashi knew that Naruto was training with at least five hundred kage bunshin for twelve hours a day, and with it being about 30 days since they had become team 7, that put his total training time at just over 20 years in a single month! Frankly, Kakashi would be shocked if Naruto wasn't already at high-chunin level, heck he wouldn't be surprised if he was low jounin. And unlike Sasuke and Sakura, Naruto had no qualms about asking him for help with different aspects of his training. Kakashi recalled that Naruto had shown a special interest in fuuinjutsu, the creation of storage scrolls especially. From what he knew, Naruto could already create them on his own.

So, the point being that Kakashi trusted Naruto to help take care of Sasuke and Sakura if or when the shit hit the fan. Naruto was a natural leader, and he hoped that this mission would help Sasuke and Sakura see him as a teammate, rather then an enemy.

He could tell that he was starting to see Naruto less and less like a student, and more and more like an equal.

'I wonder if this is what Jiraiya-sama felt like when he was training you, Minato-sensei…'


Naruto was in high spirits as he and his teammates, followed by their lazy sensei (his nose still buried in that porn of his) climbed the stairs to the mission room of the Hokage tower. He knew that it was still only a C-rank mission, so battles against rival shinobi was unlikely, but it still was nice to know they'd be getting out of the village.

Though as they were approaching the mission room, Naruto was slightly surprised to find a familiar trio walk out of it, their jounin sensei (who even the seemingly hormone-immune Naruto had to admit was pretty hot) right behind them.

"Hey Kurenai" Kakashi greeted in his usual tone, "you getting a mission too?"

"Yes, we are" the jounin replied, obviously a bit offended by the book in Kakashi's hands. "I assume you and your team are too?"

"Yep"

"Hey, losers! What's up?" Kiba greeted in his usual boisterous tone.

"Not much" Naruto replied. "Just taking missions, making cash"

"Hah! I bet you haven't gotten near as many as we have! In fact, Kurenai-sensei said we could be getting a C-ranker next week!"

Next to Naruto, Sasuke was about to speak up about how they were about to get a C-rank mission themselves, but then thought better of it. Naruto was so much better at irking people.

"Your epic fail has been noted"

Yep. Something like that.

"Wha… What? What's that supposed to mean? I didn't fail at anything" Kiba stammered, a very 'WTF?' expression on his face.

"Because, you failed so epically, you didn't even know it" Naruto explained, using a very emphasizing tone. "Am I wrong Shino?"

"Indeed" the Aburame replied, clear out of the blue, "In fact, it possessed so much epicness, that it was not epic. It was only… sort of epic"

Now Kiba was definitely questioning their sanity.

"Seriously, are you two doing PCP together or something?"

"That's what she said" Shino retorted, in a tone that reminded Sasuke and Sakura of Naruto.

"Wait… What does that even mean?"

"YOUR MOM!" Naruto shot in, confusing Kiba even more.

Kakashi, Sasuke, Sakura and Kurenai just decided to ignore the randomness and just chalk it up to them being weird. Hinata on the other hand…

'Oh, so they meant… oh Ewwww, That's just weird. Wait… I understood them… Yep. I'm going crazy too'

Interestingly, she didn't see anything bad about that.

"But to answer your question Kiba, we're here to get a C-rank mission ourselves. That is why you fail so epically"

"What? Oh… so what did the other stuff mean…?"

"Because your fail rating exceeded the fifth level of coffee grounds, it was forced to reach the second stage of Stapler, as well as passing the fourth pencil extremity. Therefore, due to the eight squared law of the Bobby Philips Continuum, Version 11.5, the rating of epicness was reset, causing your fail rating to only reach the 65.243pi percent level, despite being extremely epic to begin with" Naruto said, even pulling a large and detailed graph/chart from seemingly now-where to illustrate his point.

Now almost everyone was looking at him like he had grown a second head that was somehow made of a duck, a microwave, and the Nidaime Hokage. The exceptions being of course Shino, who was only nodding in affirmation, and Hinata, who was actually starting to understand all this.

'Oh yeah. I'm definitely going crazy'

"So… Am I supposed to understand what the hell that meant?" Kiba spoke in that extremely weirded out tone.

"Of course" Naruto said in a very creepy tone that Sasuke recognized from earlier, "If you join us"

"Huh…?"

"Join us Kiba… Join the dark side…" Naruto continued in that same extremely creepy tone as he reached into his coat, "we have cookies"

Kiba looked at the cookie that was in Naruto's hand, his sanity currently being beaten upon by a multitude of baseball bats.

"AHHHHHH!!!" obviously fearing for what was left of his sanity, Kiba screamed and made a run for the exit, falling down the stairs in the process.

"Wimp" Sasuke said simply, feeling very smug at being able to resist Naruto's insanity.

With that, Kurenai merely shook her head as she and Shino went to collect their teammate. Kakashi just shrugged.

"Well, let's go kids" with that, he took the lead, Sasuke and Sakura following behind. Naruto returned the cookie to his pocket, and made to follow them.

But even as he did, he paused as he passed the final member of team 8, who herself had paused for the exact same reason.

Without a word, Naruto patted his hand on Hinata's shoulder as he gave her a smile, a true smile.

"See you later"

Hinata could only reciprocate the grin as she brought her opposite hand up to rest on his own that was on her shoulder.

"You too"

And with that, with only five words exchanged between them, the two friends parted ways to catch up with their teams, both unaware of the exchange that had just taken place right under their noses.


"Well Kakashi, are you sure about this?" Hiruzen Sarutobi said from behind his desk in the mission room.

Next to him, Iruka was feeling a little apprehensive about all this. He knew that he shouldn't be trying to hold his former students back, but that concern he felt for them, especially Naruto, kept welling back up inside him.

As his gaze fell on Naruto, he gave him a subtle look that he knew only the blonde would know.

'Are you sure about this?'

Naruto simply gave him a cocky smirk whose meaning was obvious to the chunin.

Please don't be so insulting

For some reason, that put Iruka at ease. He knew that Naruto was a lot stronger then anyone thought, and he could look after himself. But it was the calm and collected look that Naruto had followed it up with that truly eased Iruka's mind.

Don't worry. I'll look after them

That look… it eerily reminded Iruka of someone else… a person who's selflessness to the village of nigh-legendary. A person who had thrown away his own life without a second thought to protect them.

Next to him though, Sarutobi had a small smile of pride as he noticed Naruto's look, and it's resemblance to his own successor's.

'Ah Naruto. You truly are just like him. I just hope you'll take the truth well. Heh. Who knows? You may have figured it out already'

"Yes Hokage-sama" Kakashi replied, "I have the utmost confidence that my team is ready for this"

The Sandaime nodded in acceptance as he pulled a scroll from the desk he was sitting at. "Well then, it just so happens that we have one right now" raising his voice slightly, he continued, "Your mission is to escort a master bridge builder back to his home country and protect him until his project is completed. Please come in, Tazuna-san"

The door opened on cue and an old man holding a bottle of sake stepped through, obviously slightly inebriated from the alcohol.

"These are my escorts? Geez, I asked for shinobi, not a bunch of snot-nosed brats. Especially that blonde one with the stupid hair"

Sasuke and Sakura bristled at the comment, and looked ready to pummel the old man. Naruto though, who hadn't even turn to look at their client, only gave an amused smirk as he shook his head.

"You really shouldn't underestimate shinobi Tazuna-san" he said as he snapped his fingers.

The old man raised an eyebrow, until he noticed the five kage bunshin surrounding him, all with swords/kunais held above various vital points.

"You might just end up dead"

There was a tense moment between Sasuke and Sakura when they wondered whether Naruto might actually kill the man. Kakashi, Iruka and the Sandaime were less scared. They knew from Naruto's tone that he was simply making a point.

"You'd best remember that. It might just save your life" Naruto said again, and on cue, the clones moved away from Tazuna, sheathing their blades.

"I assure you Tazuna-san," Naruto said again, this time in far less threatening tone, "you'll be safe in our care. My people and I are very good at what we do"

Kakashi just shook his head. Naruto believed that 'actions spoke louder then words' and his actions usually did. And then there was his 'speak softly, and carry a big stick' ideal.

"Anyway," the man spoke up, "You'll be well protected Tazuna-san. As Naruto said, we are quite capable of protecting you"

The jounin seemed to do a much better job at putting the old man at ease, even if the clones obviously had no intention of hurting him.

"And Naruto, please refrain from threatening the clients in the future will you? It's bad for business"

"Sure. No problem. Just as long as they don't call my hair stupid" the blonde replied.

To this, everyone sweatdropped.

"Well then, you have one day to prepare for our journey. We're going to Wave country for an extended period, possibly a month, so pack heavy. Be at the front gates at 0900 hours tomorrow. I trust that's okay with you Tazuna-san?"

"Uh… yeah. That's fine" the man said, still a bit on edge from having his life threatened over calling someone's hair stupid.

"Well, you heard the scarecrow. Let's get moving" Naruto said as he turned to his clones, making a one handed seal.

"Yes Sir"

With that, the clones made a seal too, and all six vanished in a swirl of air.


White eyes narrowed as their owner glared at the on-rushing foes.

She had to get this right. She couldn't fail again.

Her hands came together as she made the seals.

She brought her head up, taking a deep breath as she did.

She could almost feel the heat as she blew outward at the advancing force.

'Katon: Goukakyuu no jutsu!'

Bright red flames erupted from her mouth like a raging dragon. The inferno shot forward in a massive fireball, incinerating the on-coming blonde clones in an instant, and bathing the entire clearing in a soft red glow.

"You're getting better Hinata" Naruto spoke up from where he was sparring with several other clones, "I think you can use it to its maximum effectiveness now. How do you feel?" he finished as he sheathed his swords, leaving his clones to spar amongst themselves.

"A little drained" Hinata answered, "I think I might be able to manage about five more"

Naruto nodded, a small smile of pride crossing his face. Over the past few weeks, he and Hinata had been doing more then simple sparring exercises.

He might not have been familiar with the Juuyken style, but that didn't mean he couldn't help Hinata reinvent the style to suit her better. That, and he could help her with other jutsu techniques besides Juuyken.

So far, he had taught her the shuriken kage bunshin and the Goukakyuu. As he had said before, since she hadn't finished reworking her taijutsu to suit her own style, she had to have something to fall back on, and besides, if she relied too much on Juuyken, what would happen if she ever fought someone who was skilled in long range combat? In his opinion, and Hinata agreed with this, the advantages of having a more varied combat style were multi-fold. For one thing, she would be more prepared against a greater range of foes and she would have an advantage against Hyuugas that relied simply on the clan's prized taijutsu. Not to mention the fact that Naruto secretly thought that it would be the perfect way for her to get back at her father. Every weapon had its weakness, and once he and Hinata found the weaknesses to Juuyken, they were going to exploit them as much as they could.

Next to him, Hinata too was smiling at her accomplishment, and at the still burning flames that were still dying down.

'So pretty… okay Hinata, that's enough pyromania for one day'

But as her thoughts left those of her new persona's, they turned to what Naruto had said in the Hokage tower, and she felt a slight twinge of anxiety rise in her.

"So, you finally got a C-rank mission?"

Broken from his musings, Naruto paused before replying. "Yeah"

"How long will you be gone?"

"Probably a week or two. We have to protect this bridge builder in Wave country"

Hinata felt a little down at that. Even though she knew that most of his clones would be staying behind in Konoha, the fact that he would be gone was already making her feel lonely. He really was her closest friend.

"Will it… be dangerous?" she asked again, not being able to help feelings of trepidation.

"Oh yeah. It's a C-rank remember. But it's just bandits, no shinobi… probably" he replied jokingly, until he noticed the look on her face. The look of unease, anxiety, and… fear. Fear that he might not come back.

His face immediately morphed into one of reassurance, "Hey, I'll be fine. I'm taking three companies with me. It's not like its anything we can't handle-"

He was cut off as Hinata rushed him, wrapping her arms around him in a hug.

"Just… just be careful" she whispered, her face buried in his shoulder as she held him close. She was just now realizing how much Kyuubi had boosted his growth. Whereas before, they were about the same height, now she could have only barely have brought her chin over his shoulder.

Naruto's eyes widened slightly at her action, but they quickly softened, before closing as hers did. Slowly, he wrapped his arms around her as well, holding her close as he lowered his head.

"Don't worry. I will"

That whisper… it made Hinata smile. The gentleness, the confidence, and the warmth she felt like this, in his arms. She supposed that it was something she had often dreamed about and now… it was happening.

"You… You'll come back right?" she said again as she lifted her head up to meet his gaze.

"Yeah. Don't worry, I'll be fine. I promise"

Those last two words… they meant so much to Hinata. The way he said it… she knew he would do everything he could to fulfill it. He would keep that promise.

"Thank you"

She was so happy right now… feeling safe in his arms. She almost felt tears welling up in her eyes.

Naruto himself was feeling a similar feeling. This warmth… it was unlike anything he had ever felt before… and he liked it. This… felt right somehow. He didn't know why, but it just did.

They both stood there for several minutes, both content in the other's embrace.


Fire…

Darkness…

Pain…

Death…

Why?

Why were they doing this to him?

What had he done to deserve this?

It was that day again. The day he had been born. They were always the angriest on that day.

They were coming… coming for him.

So he ran. He ran as fast as he could.

Down the streets, through the alleys. Maybe… maybe he could get lucky this time. Maybe he could get away. If he found the old man maybe… just maybe…

He screamed in pain as the kunai went into his leg.

He couldn't run anymore… his leg couldn't support him.

So he fell. Fell right in front of them. That raging mob of demons.

"Awww. So the little demon boy thought he could get away huh? Well, that's not gonna happen this time!"

"Yeah!"

"Die demon!"

"Kill the monster!"

Rough hands gripped him… breaking a few of the little bones in his body…

One of them came up to him, a torch in hand…

"You like burning our families? Well how 'bout I burn YOU!"

He screamed in pain as the torch was thrust into his chest, the fire burning his skin.

The figures around him only laughed at his pain

"This is for my brother!"

A sword was thrust into his shoulder. He screamed in pain.

"We're going to finish what Yondaime-sama started!"

He heard cheering. Many voices all at once.

"Get the rope!"

"String him up!"

"Make him pay!"

More came. The knives, the swords, the clubs, the boots. They all came down on him. He could hardly see… so much blood… all of it his.

Then… through all of it… a roar. A roar of flames.

And… A voice… something only heard for its defiance…

"STOP IT!!"

Naruto shot up, sitting upright in his bed, panting heavily, his face covered in sweat.

His breathing slowing back down, Naruto looked around, taking in his small, darkened apartment, a disgusted look on his face as he looked back down with his eyes closed.

"I hate this place…"

Getting up, the blonde tore the covers off of his body as he got out of bed. He couldn't stand this place anymore. The lights remained off as his enhanced vision could see fine even in this low light. Quickly, but deliberately, he got dressed, putting his black pants on over his boxers and changing the white T-shirt he slept in for his normal black shirt. Finishing his attire with his jacket, boots, headband and weapons, he was out the door in under two minutes after he had woken up.

Naruto gave a small smile of contentment as he leaned back against the hard stone. He was currently sitting on the carving of the nose of Sarutobi's massive head carving, gazing out at the moon shining its white light over Konoha. He liked coming up here… especially during the full moon. There was just something about moonlight… something that he thought gave it such a supernatural beauty… The cool night air… the breeze up on the mountain… the moonlight shining down on him… the serene solitude… it had a calming effect on him… usually.

It would be so easy he mused… Just a few thousand kage bunshin, all primed for simultaneous detonation, scattered all across Konoha. He could have some bore underground too. No one could detect them, until it was too late. And maybe he could put a few hundred in the mountain he was sitting on, maybe bring that down on all they're heads too…

No one would survive really. Chunin, jounin, ANBU… They just wouldn't be able to survive explosions that big and that numerous. The Sandaime might live, but he could just put a few dozen more clones in the Hokage tower…

And it wouldn't take to long to set up either… Maybe a day or two if he had all of the commanders pitching in.

And then… in a single instant, he could erase Konoha from the face of the earth… with a single thought… No traces… no witnesses… No one would or ever could suspect him… Konoha would just be… gone… The greatest of the ninja villages… obliterated in a single instant at the hands of lowly genin.

'No… that wouldn't be right. I haven't given them the chance'

He might be vindicated in wiping the village off the map… making all of those bastards pay… he was sure that even Hinata would understand, and perhaps even support such a decision… but he knew it wasn't right. There were many down there who had done him no wrong. They didn't deserve such a fate. And even then… if he really wanted to annihilate all those bastards that had tortured him… he wouldn't want to do it like that. They would know. They would know that it was they themselves who had brought this hell upon Konoha. They would know that it was they who sowed the seeds of their own destruction. And besides… he really didn't give a shit about them anymore anyway.

But in any event… he could no longer live in that dingy apartment. That place held too many memories, all of them bad, he mused as he leapt to the top of the stone head.

It was time to move up the plans.

"Ratchet" the blonde called up.

"Yes sir?" came a softer voice from a clone suddenly appearing on the top of the head behind him. If one was observing, they'd notice that this one was different from regular clones. His hair was a dark brown, and was laid down with no spikes at all. His eyes were a dark green, and gazed out from behind a pair of non-descript glasses that always adorned his face. In fact, the only real similarity to the original was the six whisker marks adorning his cheeks.

"I want to move up the Armored Waterfall project. Can you do that?"

The clone gave a small nod.

"Of course sir. We've finished drawing up the plans, and we've surveyed the site. It's perfect. All we need is the old man's permission and the raw materials and we can get started."

"Good" the junchurriki nodded in affirmation, "See if you can start construction tomorrow. I'd rather not be sleeping in that apartment anymore."

The brown-haired clone nodded as he walked up to stand beside his commander.

"Bad dreams sir?"

"Not dreams… just memories…" was all he answered.

The clone looked on in sympathy.

"We'll make sure to have it finished by the time you and the others get back"

"Thank you Ratchet" Naruto replied, returning his gaze to the moon above, "It really is beautiful isn't it?"

The head of the Manufacturing and Construction division nodded as he followed his gaze.

"That it is sir. That it is"


It was a bright day in Konoha, a nice one for traveling.

At least that's what Naruto thought as he stood at the south gate with his teammates, sensei and their client. Kakashi was clearing their departure with the two chunin on gate duty while Sasuke and Sakura looked to be filled with anticipation, though Sakura seemed to be anxious as well. Naruto had to admit, he was feeling slightly anxious, though those feelings were quickly squashed by his anticipation. This would be his first time outside of the village, and that meant that things were bound to get interesting. If nothing else, maybe they'd get a bandit attack or something. He shrugged the strap on his backpack, a large black one with lots of pockets for whatever he might need. Sasuke and Sakura were wearing packs too, though theirs were noticeably smaller and held less stuff. Kakashi's was more similar to his own.

"Well team," Kakashi said as he walked back to them, "shall we get moving?"

"Guess so" Naruto drawled. He might be looking forward to this, but that still didn't mean he wasn't board.

"Yeah. We're ready" Sasuke added, a confident smirk on his face, Sakura merely nodded enthusiastically.

"Yes. I'd like to get home as soon as possible" Tazuna put in.

"Right, let's get going then" Kakashi affirmed as turned towards the gate, leading his team out.

'Well... our first C-ranker. This should be interesting'


Five hours down the road, for the first time since the awakening, Naruto could honestly say, he was board. He supposed that he hadn't counted on the fact that Sasuke and Sakura hated him too much for conversation and Kakashi had his nose buried in that porn of his, so he probably should have brought something to entertain himself. Problem was, he had no such things. Sakura had kept pestering Tazuna with questions about his home, and while that had been something to listen too, he was soon bored with that too.

Giving a glance back to his teacher, Naruto decided to take a chance with that.

"So what is so interesting about that book anyway?"

"It's a well-written piece of literature. Why else do you think I like it?"

"Somehow, I can't see how pornographic writing can be so terribly interesting" Naruto said in a sarcastic tone.

"Well, it's more then that" Kakashi defended, reaching into his ninja pouch. Naruto raised an eyebrow as his sensei produced a second book of the same series, "And you really shouldn't bash something until you've looked at it yourself" he finished as he tossed it to the blonde.

Naruto caught the book, giving it a curious look. It was the first book of the series.

"I suppose you do have a point there" he replied as he opened it to the first page.

'Besides, what's the worst that could happen?'

Naruto would eventually learn to regret those words (sort of).


"You know what Kakashi-sensei?"

"Hm?"

"I take back what I said. This is actually some pretty good work"

It was two hours later, and Naruto could certainly say that this series had him hooked.

"Told ya" Kakashi said, a small smug grin on his face.

"That you did" Naruto agreed as he turned a page, "And what I'm amazed by is that this has an amazing story to it. I thought it was just going to be a bunch of smut, but it actually has some really good substance to it. I'm surprised by how he strings it all together. And the smut seems to actually fit into the story rather well"

"That it does" Kakashi agreed, "Why do you think I like it so much?"

"I can see why now. Jiraiya certainly knows how to write a good book"

"Indeed"

"How many books has he written again?"

Kakashi had to restrain a slight chuckle. He wondered if he was doing a good thing by corrupting his sensei's son like this, but hey, he was mature enough for this. "He's up to the eighth volume of this series, and he has several other books that tie into the main series. Most of them are pure smut though, I doubt you'd be interested in them. But when you finish that one, I can loan you the next volume if you're interested"

"I think I might be"

Next to them, Sakura (having been too absorbed either asking questions about their destination or trying (and failing) to woo Sasuke) seemed to have just taken notice of the fact that now both her annoying teammate and sensei had their noses buried in a special little book.

"What the hell?!!! You're reading that porn now too?!"

"-sigh- It was then that Sakura tripped on a rock"

"Huh?" WHAM. Sakura was cut off as she tripped on a rock, falling flat on her face.

"And there was much rejoicing"

On cue, several clones suddenly popped into existence, all of them waving overly large and colorful flags in a one-handed jerking motion that made them look like something out of a badly drawn cartoon while cheering in an extremely disinterested and monotonous tone.

"Yay…"


It was several hours of walking later, as the sun was near the horizon, that Kakashi decided they should pitch camp in a clearing off to the side of the road.

"Yeah, this spot should do" taking off his backpack, Kakashi began unpacking the tent that he and Tazuna would be sharing, still giving out orders, "Naruto, get some firewood. Sasuke, Sakura, start setting up other tent"

"Understood" Naruto replied simply as he made a one-handed seal. On cue, ten Kage Bunshin poofed into existence. Seven proceeded to run off into the woods, while the other three stayed at the original's side.

Said original proceeded to remove his back-pack and place it on the ground. Reaching into one of his pockets, the blonde pulled out a medium-sized scroll that Kakashi was pretty sure was marked 'Shelter'. Naruto slowly unrolled the scroll until he found a certain seal. With a quick swipe of some blood, a folded up, one-person tent appeared with a 'poof'.

As he and his clones quickly got to work setting up the tent, Naruto noticed the looks his teammates and client were giving him.

"Storage seals. Infinitely useful"

"Naruto" Kakashi started, "The plan was to bring only two double-tents. That way we can always have three of us sleep and one on watch at all times"

"Yeah. But I can bring an extra tent along no problem and my clones can keep watch. I guarantee you they're better watchers then those two, plus we all get more rest as a result" Naruto replied, "Besides, no way am I bunking with either of those two. The banshee might try to kill me in my sleep, and I'm still not sure how straight emo-boy is so bunking with him is a definite no-no"

Sasuke and Sakura looked slightly annoyed, until they realized what Naruto had meant by the last part.

"HEY! Sasuke-kun isn't gay! How dare you insinuate that!"

"Hey, I'm just taking precautions. Remember, he's ignored the propositions of an entire army of fangirls so you never know… Besides, doesn't this mean that you'll be sharing the tent with him the entire night?"

Sasuke immediately paled slightly as Sakura seemed to register this, and then gave a fangirlish squeal.

"You're welcome"

Kakashi just rolled his eyes at Naruto's antics. He did make a solid point though. There was no real problem if Naruto had brought his own tent, and with his clones on guard duty, that did mean that they'd all be getting more rest.

"Alright Naruto, you win. We'll go with your plan. Though were all counting on those clones of yours."

"I hear ya"

"Oh, and Sakura, Sasuke"

"Yes sensei?" the pink-haired girl looked up from eagerly setting up the tent alongside a grumbling Sasuke.

"Konoha law states that any and all pregnancies in kunoichi under the age of sixteen must be aborted. You should probably keep that in mind"

At this comment Sakura turned a shade of red that Naruto was pretty sure could even rival Hinata's, while Sasuke turned an odd combination of paling and blushing at the same time.

Naruto simply broke out in a faux-maniacal cackle.

"And you call us perverts…"


Kakashi's eyes flickered open, his hand reflexively reaching for a kunai. He thought he heard something.

No, just Tazuna snoring on the other side of the tent.

The jounin was about to nod off again when…

"Were their any complications?"

Kakashi's eye opened wider as he heard Naruto's voice coming from outside the tent. It was soft, very soft. It was so quiet that he had to concentrate chakra to his ears to hear it clearly.

"Not a problem sir"

"Any trackers?"

"None sir. We're clear all the way back to Konoha"

"Good"

Those voices… he was definitely talking with his clones. He was probably just getting a status report from the guards he put up around their camp. Yeah. Probably that.

But even so, as he fell back asleep, Kakashi couldn't shake the feeling that there was something… off about voices Naruto was talking to.

Meanwhile, in the other double tent, Sakura had been woken up as well. At first she had been confused, but then she remembered Naruto talking about putting his clones on guard duty. Why should she care if he decided to have a conversation with some of his clones?

As she was about to lay her head back down on the camping pillow she had brought, her eyes suddenly fell on the sleeping form of Sasuke on the sleeping bag next to hers (the weather was far too warm to warrant sleeping in the bags) and something suddenly dawned on her.

As a fangirlish grin spread across her face, she began moving closer.

'Ino would kill me if she ever found out about this. Hehehehe'


Sasuke was in a doze as he woke up. He never really was a morning person.

"Ugh… What time is it?"

He tried to move his arm, but noticed that there was a lot of extra weight on it. He looked over and saw pink hair...

'Wait a minute...pink hair?...!!' Sasuke resisted the urge to scream, as Sakura seemed to be asleep.

"Mmm, Sasuke-kun...harder..." Sakura mumbled in her sleep.

Sasuke's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. 'HARDER?! Do WHAT harder?!' he frantically tried to recall doing anything with or to his female teammate.

"Ohhh, yeeesss...right there...that's it..." Sakura continued to make lude comments in her sleep.

Sasuke's eye twitched violently. How could this have happened? And why with her of all people?!

"Mmm, It's sooooo good..." Sakura mumbled.

Little did Sasuke know, Sakura's dream consisted of him giving her a massage, and cooking for her. Despite her seemingly naughty words, her dream was fairly innocent.

"Sasuke-kun...should I get the whip-..." Sakura mumbled the rest, but Sasuke had heard enough to jump to a conclusion. What he didn't know was that Sakura was just asking him if she should get the whipped cream for the sundaes they were eating in her dream.

But because Sasuke hadn't bothered to pay close enough attention, he was completely terrified.

Sakura chose this moment to snuggle up to her "pillow". She buried her face in the crook of Sasuke's neck and took a deep sniff.

This set Sasuke off and he did the only thing he could...


"Ehh?" Naruto looked up from collapsing his tent in the early morning sunrise to the girly screaming coming from his teammates' tent.

Getting to his feet, he shook his head in exasperation.

"Now I'm really glad I brought my own tent" But he had to admit, that Uchiha could really scream. Heck, he actually thought that it could have been Sakura for a second back there, though it would have scared him if it had been Sakura. I mean, Sasuke taking an interest in one of his fangirls? Wasn't that one of the signs of the apocalypse or something? And he highly doubted that Sakura would be screaming in terror if she woke up to being groped by Sasuke.

His musings were broken as Kakashi burst from his own tent, obviously fearing some kind of an attack judging by the kunai in his hand.

"What happened?" his tone quickly dropping to more curious to fearing as he noticed that nothing seemed to be wrong and the screaming was coming from the other double-tent.

Naruto just shrugged, "I guess Sakura just decided to take my advice about when to try raping him. I thought I saw her putting something in his water last night"

And he had also said this just loud enough for the occupants of the tent to hear.

"YOU DID WHAT?!!?!?"


About an hour later, the five of them were on the road again, Sasuke making sure to keep as much distance between himself and Sakura as possible, despite her protests that she had not raped or tried to rape him (which was true), and that she had no idea how they ended up like that (which wasn't).

Naruto and Kakashi meanwhile had their noses buried in pages of Icha Icha again while Tazuna was just confused over what had happened.

Meaning none of them gave much visible notice to the two puddles they were passing between.

Suddenly, and without warning, two massive chains lined with razor blades shot out of the puddles, wrapping around the one person walking out front, Kakashi.

And before anyone could do more then register this, the chains were pulled, and the man was ripped to shreds.

"SENSEI!" Sakura screamed in terror as the two puddles 'poofed' away to reveal two men in heavy body-armor with large clawed gauntlets along with the massive razor chain that connected them.

"Heh. One down" on of them spoke, before both rushed the rest of the group.

"Four to go!"

As the two shinobi came at the group, Sakura found herself unable to move. These people… they were really trying to kill her… She… She was going to die…

Sasuke was far less frozen, leaping in front of Tazuna to protect him. Naruto on the other hand…

The moment the chain had shot from the puddles, the blonde had undergone a transformation. The lazy, joking expression from before had been replaced with that of a battle-hardened warrior. No fear. No hesitation. No Mercy.

By the time Kakashi had been shredded, Naruto had already stowed his book in a coat pocket, and as the two shinobi rushed their group, his hands went into the two ninja pouches on the back of his waist. Inexplicably, he pulled out a pair of massive fuma shurikens and with a quick motion, hurled both of them at the armored ninja.

The two attackers were obviously surprised by Naruto's zeal, but they quickly countered, deflecting the projectiles with their gauntlets.

But even as the massive shuriken flew off into the air, they suddenly poofed into smoke to reveal a pair of Kage bunshin.

'What?! Henge'd clones?'

The clones each hurled six kunai at the pair, who brought up their gauntlets as shields to guard themselves. But as the kunai impacted, they exploded into a massive cloud of smoke, not unlike a smoke bomb.

"Kadmus team, engage bogies! Halo Team, extraction now!"

"Yes sir!"

As her vision was obscured, Sakura was startled as she was suddenly picked up by someone.

As the smoke began to clear, the two armored shinobi were surprised to see that though their target was almost right in front of them a second ago, he and the brats were gone.

"Did they make a run for it?"

"I don't know. Maybe-"

The second brother was cut off as katana blade came directly at him, inserting itself into the chink in his armor just under his arm.

"What?!" with a quick motion and ignoring the pain, he thrust his other arm at the attacker, only for it to hit empty air.

As the smoke cleared further, the man's eyes widened further at what he saw. Clones. Almost twenty of them, all coming at him with various bladed weapons. Pulling the katana from his side, he tried to bring it up to defend himself, only for the sword to 'poof' away. By that time, the attackers were on him. Using all the skill he had, Mizu fought off his attackers, glancing to his left to see his brother, Gozu, facing similar opponents.

It was unreal. The clones moved with incredible coordination. It was like they were real people instead of just chakra constructs. He could barely keep them off of him.

Deciding to stop fighting alone, the two brothers nodded to each other before leaping to the center of the road, their backs to each other. After all, they were just clones that they were fighting. They just needed to dispell all of them.

"Sir, targets are in position"

"Roger that. Jango squad, engage Inferno Webbing maneuver. Innis squad, engage Fire Blast support on my command"

"Yes Sir!"

The brothers were caught off guard when suddenly, dozens of ninja wire shot from the trees, all of them led by shuriken. The wires twisted around the two of them, effectively immobilizing them.

'What?! They were luring us this whole time?!'

The two looked up to the trees on either side to see several flames flare up from within the trees, each of them at the end of a grouping of the wires.

'Wait… this jutsu is…'

Each flame grew until they each resembled a dragon of some kind.

And then, they struck.

"BARBAQUE TIME!!"

The flames shot out along the wires, setting the two bound ninja ablaze.

The two shinobi howled in pain, but their armor held. This Ryuuka technique was weaker then usual, and wasn't strong enough to burn through their armor. If they could just break the wires…

"Initiate Blast stage"

With that order, a hail of kunai came flying from the trees, hitting the ground around the flaming shinobi.

'Wha…?'

Then they noticed it. Several clones, all arranged around the perimeter of the woods, making handseals.

Simultaneously, the members of Innis squad took a deep breath, and breathed out a blast of hell itself.

"Goukakyuu no jutsu"

As the fireballs flew towards them, Gozu noticed out of the corner of his eye, that the kunai surrounding them had begun to glow.

As his world was consumed by flames, both brothers could barely make out the sound of snapping fingers.

And then they knew no more.


"Web-Binding Incineration maneuver; successful" Naruto said to himself from where he stood in the tree tops above the road, well hidden from anyone from the road. Around him were the members of the Fidchell and Gamma fireteams. A few branches down, keeping a close eye on his teammates and client was Halo team.

Naruto had to admit, that worked far better then he thought it would.

"Sir, targets are confirmed down"

"Good job Forge" Naruto replied to the Kadmus team leader. "Echo, Delta, Cubia, find anything?"

"No sir, we're clear across the board. No reinforcements detected" replied a voice that one might find odd for its high-pitched, feminine tone.

"Alright, good job Casper" "All units, stand down"

"Yes sir!"

With that, Naruto and his clones jumped down to the ground, Halo team close behind, their members still holding an annoyed Sasuke, an irate Sakura, and two supporting Tazuna who was wondering what the hell had just happened.

"Hey! Put me down dammit!" Sakura screamed at the clone holding her slung over one arm.

"Hey, we just saved your life. I'd be a little more thankful if I were you"

"Let her down Hammer. You too Fixer. You don't want to be exposed to them for any longer then necessary now do you?" Naruto ordered as he approached the charring corpses in the road.

"Yes sir" the clones replied, quickly dropping Sasuke and Sakura flat on their faces. The ones supporting Tazuna just let him down.

Sakura was about to start screaming at them again when she noticed the charred corpses in the middle of the road, and promptly felt too sick to do anything of the sort.

Naruto just shook his head before looking up to the trees.

"So, how was that Kakashi-sensei?"

Sakura's eyes widened in realization as she remembered what had happened. That man… her sensei… had been ripped to shreds… he was dead…

So you can imagine her surprise when said dead guy jumped out of the trees, his nose still in that porn of his like nothing had happened.

"Not bad. Though I think you went a little overboard back their" the jounin said, motioning towards the two barbecued shinobi.

"Ka…Kakashi-sensei! You're alive!"

At this, Naruto, Kakashi and Sasuke gave her a confused look, while Tazuna was of a similar opinion to hers.

"Yeah, why wouldn't he be? Don't you think a human body should fall to fleshy chunks when ripped apart and not wood?" Naruto said, pointing to the broken pieces of wood where Kakashi had been standing when he had been apparently ripped apart.

"Oh…" Sakura replied, feeling extremely stupid right now. Of course, it was a kawarimi. But then a new thought occurred to her.

"Wait a minute! Why didn't you help us?! Those guys could have killed us back there!"

"I wanted to see how you all would handle this kind of situation. And I have to say Naruto, you did quite well. Though in the future, you might want to rely on your teammates more"

"Yeah yeah, I'll keep that in mind" Naruto said dismissively as he walked over to the bodies.

Naruto seemed completely unfazed by the sight as he stood over the bodies, while a trio of clones was on their knees examining them.

"Well Jester? Can we salvage anything from these two?"

"Well, there's no recognizable features as you can see, but we should still be able to get some DNA from the head, and their teeth and jaws are still mostly intact too so there's always dental records"

"Good to hear. Grab 'em and bag 'em then" Naruto replied.

The clone nodded as he and his comrades immediately removed the heads of the two shinobi, sealing them up in a scroll.

Kakashi gave a small smile at that action. Naruto sure did his homework on this. The so-called 'Demon Brothers of the Mist' had a pretty decent bounty on their heads as he recalled, and Naruto was exploiting this encounter to its fullest extent.

But it was then that he noticed something odd about the clones. None of them were identical to Naruto, in appearance, attire or equipment.

Their clothing also varied from something similar to jounin attire (minus the flack jacket) and various pieces of armor to something resembling an ANBU uniform (minus the mask) that the clones that had engaged the demon brothers wore, to a more simple attire of a dark jacket and pants that the ones sealing the head wore. And then there was their equipment. None were using the same oddly shaped swords (Scimitars as Kakashi recalled) that Naruto was carrying. Some were using katanas while others held wakizashis. All of their hair was spiked to some degree, though none were in the same style as Naruto. Some had hair that was more laid back while others had it spiked more in the front, along with varying colors from a darker blonde to a dark red. And there were more physical differences too. Their eye color also varied, ranging from brown, to dark blue, to even a bright green and purple. None though, had eyes the same vibrant blue hue of the original. Some were slightly taller, others shorter. Some with a larger body build, others smaller, but none were an exact replication of the original.

But the most extreme example of this use of variety was the clone who had just dropped down from the trees and was now talking with the original, her squad directly behind her.

Yes. Her.

This clone, and several others in the teams around them… were female.

All of them had an appearance similar to the form of Naruto's infamous 'sexy technique', though just like with the others, none had the exact same blonde hair or blue eyes, the one Naruto was talking to had brownish hair that fell simply down her back and had an attire similar to hunter-nins, a theme replicated by the clones behind her. And the other interesting thing was that there was no separation between the two gender types. It was as if his entire force was replicating an actually combat squad of real people, in fact, were it not for the fact that throughout the entire troop of clones, the only real similarity to the original was the three whisker marks adorning their cheeks, Kakashi would have thought these were a mysterious group of people that Naruto had convinced to follow his orders.

And thanks to his enhanced hearing, honed by years of combat experience, Kakashi could make out his student's conversation with the clone (though 'clone' was pushing it a little).

"Anything to report Serena?"

The clone replied in an oddly accented tone that Kakashi instantly recognized as the one he overheard last night. "No sir. We scanned the entire area. If these two were working with anyone, they aren't here"

"I see… Alright then, I want you and your squad to make a C-class perimeter around us at all times. I don't want anything more surprises on this trip okay? Link up with Casper and Talon to form up that perimeter"

The clone made a quick motion with her right hand, bringing it up to her forehead in a salute. "Yes sir!"

Naruto returned the gesture before turning away as the clone left with her squad.

"Sergeant Forge"

"Yes sir?" a clone with a slightly larger build with brown eyes and a more gruff tone, the same one that was leading the clones that engaged the demon brothers, said as he walked up, his dual katanas in long scabbards on his back.

"Take your squads and form up a close perimeter around us. Also keep enough in reserve to back up the recon teams. If anyone else does come after us, chances are they're gonna hit them first. And have at least one fireteam shadowing the old man at all times"

"You got it Chief" the clone replied as he saluted before going back to his teams.

As he did, Naruto himself turned away, quickly making his way past Sasuke and Sakura, who were still shocked by the odd force of clones that Naruto seemed to command without question, until he stood before Tazuna. He gave the obviously unsettled man a hard look before speaking.

"So Tazuna-san… Ready to tell us what the hell we really signed up for?"


And so the Wave arc commences. As I said last chapter, expect some good some stuff from this. I am definitely going to have some fun with this.

And if you're confused about the clones, don't worry, more will be explained on them next chapter, as well as Naruto's reasoning behind creating such a diversified fighting force. For the record, the clones are going to play a very large role in the story, both as a weapon and as actual characters. Expect more from them.

Oh, and kudos to the one who spots the Mounty Python and Halo references (expect more of both)

Of course, I found a way to include more NaruHinaness, and some craziness from Naruto and Shino.

Next Chapter: Demons in the Mist… and a fish. Oh and Tacos. Tasty Tacos.

Read and Review (or you shall trip on a rock. And there will be much rejoicing)