Chapter 11
Author's Note: This is word emphasis
This is dreams/flashbacks/mindscapes
This is book, movie, anime, and music titles
-This is texting-
* this is telepathy*
Outskirts of Toyama:
Those chosen to deal with Talpa, and his particular brand of stupidity are all laughing their asses off at the fact that the spectral head looked like he wanted to bang said head against something, only to remember he couldn't. Were they to know that the Warlords had fled from the Nether Realm to theirs in order to get drunk, and avoid the demon unleashed on Talpa they would laugh even harder. Even their two mortal companions found this to be hilarious. Yulie had heard his father cursing out this particular demon very creatively whenever tax time rolled around. Rowen, Ryo, and Sage are all very smug that they had a hand in unleashing that particular horror on their spectral foe. They had also discretely filled out the forms Hermes had left behind granting them immunity from The Tamer's pet.
Paris:
Adrien finds himself more relaxed than he has been in years, and it's all because he was no longer living in Agreste Manor. The meet and greet at Diana's place could have gone better. Usagi had refused to go on the grounds that she knew damned well Diana had revealed her identity to entirely too damned many people. It made it far easier for Hawk Moth to gain leverage against Dream Wolf. Usagi was firmly of the belief that people like them should maintain their separate lives. Dream Wolf and Ladybug had gotten into a shouting match over their weapons. One that Ladybug had won. Marinette wisely was keeping quiet about Ladybug's civilian identity, and Nino just shrugged, he didn't care either way. Diana knew there was no way in hell Adrien would ever reveal what his Ladybug didn't want revealed. Especially considering how protective he happened to be of her, in both lives.
His younger blonde girlfriend was snuggled up into him, and even better her grandmother had finally allowed her to transfer schools after the latest incident. She was now attending one of the local public schools, and had every possible route to and from mapped out, the security blind spots as well. They were still watching Bleach, since that particular anime had a shit ton of episodes. Today he didn't have any photo shoots, a day off from his fencing lessons, and he had mastered Mandarin, Usagi was the one teaching him Japanese, and he was currently deciding which language to learn next. He liked learning languages. It didn't hurt that Usagi made him write his class notes down in Japanese as practical experience. It was because of that, that he was making much faster progress than a student generally would.
It also baffled his friends, and Ms. Bustier until he explained his Japanese teacher had given him the assignment. It also made copying his notes that much harder, and to be even more difficult Adrien also filled out his homework in different languages if he worked on it at school. Once his teachers learned why he was doing that, they allowed the habit to continue. Writing in another language to stymy cheating was not something they had ever thought of. Once Nino caught on Adrien smirks, and hires Nino a tutor to teach him Russian. Nino liked the idea of learning the language to the point he was learning quickly. Writing out your homework, and class notes in a language not your birth tongue was a surprisingly good study method.
Of course, neither of the blonde couple realized that Kurosaki Ichigo was actually real. His story had been written down by an enterprising seer long before Ichigo awakened his heritage. Once Ichigo found out about the manga, and anime written about his life he'd ask for royalties, and that would be the end of it. Sadly for the Black Cat otaku's Train Heartnet did not exist in their dimension. Once things were settled with Hawk Moth they'd demand Zelretch send them to a dimension in which they could meet Train. Naturally they'd make damned certain they had skills that would be useful to him, and more importantly, kill that damned Creed Diskenth. Train's creepy as fuck stalker fanboy. Adrien, and surprisingly Alexandre were all for using the Cataclysm to get rid of the pain in the ass. Hell, if they could steal Train and Eva, they'd be happy. Eva could easily pose as Adrien's little sister attending a specialized school, and it would be a simple matter for Adrien to use his pet to pull that off too.
Zelretch would agree to it, if only because of how much chaos Adrien and Usagi caused on a daily basis. Usagi sits bolt upright just then, her chaos senses going off, and then she curses. Her sapphire eyes are narrowed into slits, " Excuse me, Orokana neko, someone is challenging me. "
Pranksters everywhere shudder at the warning that goes down their spines, some idiot was challenging their Queen. This would not be good, Kitsune got vicious when defending her title. Usagi changes outfits, puts her hair up in such a way that it can't be messed with, and teleports away. Adrien, Tikki, and Plagg all look at each other, " Why do I get the feeling this is not going to be pleasant? " Tikki asks.
Adrien winces, " You're developing a proper chaos sense. My Lady is a major troll, and a possessive and vindictive bitch. Piss her off at your own peril! Challenge her for her title as Kitsune, well I do not pity whatever poor idiot thought it was a good idea. "
Paris in General:
Tsukino Usagi takes one look at her new school, and the curses she let loose had the pedestrians stopping, and taking notes. The blonde sets to dismantling every single prank that was designed to hit her, her ire rising to dangerous levels. Not even Loki would get in her way when she was this pissed off. Then she sees the camera at the front door, and grins maliciously, texting her second in command to back hack the signal.
Ekoda:
Kuroba Kaito blinks at the text he receives from his Queen until he reads all of it, and the warning feeling that had gone down his spine earlier was starting to make more sense. With a gleeful cackle he immediately sets to work. If you didn't want his Queen going after you, don't challenge her. Once he back hacked the signal he sends the information to his Queen, and starts to immediately do a background check on the poor sap. He has to cackle when the idiot has their web cam uncovered, and pointing right at them. Seeing exactly whom was challenging his Queen Kaito cackles even louder, sending everything he had on the sap to his Queen. That it was someone he really didn't like was just icing on the cake. He loathed Akako, and he didn't need her help with his career, thank you. Any true purveyor knew damned well how to hide what they did, Hakuba still had no idea whom Kaitou KID happened to be.
If he had his way, then the blonde haired bastard would never figure it out either. He may be worthy of dating Aoko, but Kaito would never really like him.
Paris:
Usagi smirks wickedly when she gets so much lovely information from Coyote. Time to set to work, the bitch would learn not to challenge her authority any time soon. She even gives offerings to Loki to make damned sure Akako couldn't magic her way out of the prank war she initiated by calling Kitsune out. Needless to say her challenger would be shocked that none of her pranks would hit Kitsune. Though really, if Loki himself couldn't beat her in a prank war, what hope did a mere mortal have anyway? With all the chaos she'd been causing Loki was very quick indeed to make it so any spell Akako tried would backfire on her in a rather spectacular fashion. His fellow deities of magic wouldn't be able to complain either, because she gave him plenty of offerings in the form of her pranks, and siccing her boyfriend's pet on those that pissed her off, or on a spectral head on the suggestion of one of The Chemist's enablers.
Then there was the fact that Sailor Pluto made the spectacular mistake of going after The Tamer's unofficial girlfriend, and her reincarnated shadow protector/lover. With how much chaos the blonde power couple of Paris was causing any chaos deity would answer their prayers immediately, and they were amusing Zelretch to the point where he didn't even need to stir up any chaos. This meant Zelretch's usual victims were all becoming very twitchy, as he had stopped trolling them. They were all becoming properly paranoid about the fact that he wasn't doing anything to them.
Diana pauses, and then winces, dear Fenrir, whom the hell was challenging Kitsune of all beings to a prank war for the title? That was just asking for trouble, and then she pales, she had remembered something about the Moon Princess, she had been a massive troll, capable of beating Loki in a prank war. She was suddenly very terrified of what would happen if she were to meet Ladybug in person, she'd still been out of it during the Copy Chat mess. Magical defenders were only truly effective if no one knew their identities, this way no one could gain leverage over them. Most beings wouldn't even dare to try and go after Ladybug, as no one wanted a pissed off, and protective Chat Noir after them. Parisians were also willing to bet that Ladybug was just as possessive, and protective of her Orokana neko. Those that had taken the time to actually translate her pet name for him had laughed. Chat Noir's better half called him a silly cat in Japanese.
At the Louvre are Marinette and Alya, they also get to meet Alix's older brother a historian whom was fascinated with King Tut's era. Only Marinette noticed the picture that looked like an Egyptian style Ladybug. Somehow she just knew this was going to bite them all in the ass. She openly curses when Jalil is mocked by his superior. Alya looks at her, " Why are you cursing anyhow? "
" Haven't you noticed how Hawk Moth picks his victims yet? " Marinette asks.
Alya blinks, and her curses join Marinette's, " Right, we're out of here. "
The best friends hightail it, though Marinette does send a text to all the other Miraculous Holders about what was about to go down. Throughout Paris four teens start swearing, you;d think locals would at least stop putting down their fellow Parisians. It was obvious how Hawk Moth picked his victims. Usagi was still laying out all the pranks for the upstart challenging her, so this leaves Nino, and Diana to hightail it to the Louvre, " Ryurix, Flame On! "
" Kiba, Fangs Bared! "
Marinette stuck with Alya, mostly to try and keep her best friend out of trouble. If they needed a healer then she'd transform. Dream Wolf and Drago Blaze both swear very profusely when they realize the poor akumatized bastard can call upon the powers of the Egyptian pantheon. Dream Wolf curses, Ladybug was still dealing with the upstart that had challenged her position as Kitsune, and Chat wouldn't show up without his Lady. Too many bad things happened when they ended up separated. People getting turned into mummies was something they could do without though. Thankfully they were both suited for melee style combat, but this also meant they couldn't keep The Pharaoh contained either.
Once back at home Usagi is still on edge, at least until Adrien kisses her, " We need to go deal with the newest victim, My Lady. "
" Do I get a massage in my future? "
" Once the fight's over, I might be persuaded to pamper you for the rest of the day. " Adrien admits readily. Lavender oil was the best to use for relaxing his girlfriend when it came to giving her massages. He was still continuing those lessons too, apparently his mother had figured out he was no longer living with his father, and instead of getting mad at him set him up an account he could use, when he wasn't busy using all the credit cards that he was an authorized user for. Tanking his father's credit rating was fun, even if Gabriel always made sure to pay them off in full all the time, he was currently buried under his son's pet. His mother had laughed her ass off when she found out what her son had done. Sure, she couldn't come back yet, but at least he knew she'd left to keep him safe. When he learned that his mother was someone that was the enemy to all who live by logic he'd cackle, maniacally. Not only that, but she wasn't a native to this dimension either.
" Tikki, Spots On! "
" Plagg, Claws Out! "
Once they've transformed Ladybug teleports them out, the French chapter of the Sorcerers' Guild had agreed to make it so no one could track Usagi/Ladybug if she teleported. That had only happened because some hapless sorceress had hit on Chat Noir in full sight of ladybug, and she had gone on a Lina Inverse style rampage. Learning that Ladybug was her direct blood descendant, and just as capable of tossing Dragon Slaves around all day like candy had made them very amenable to helping her and Chat out. Their home could now only be entered by those they had previously invited over, no one of ill intent could get in, and there was a permanent arrogant, hypocritical exorcist repelling ward around the Albarn heiress as well. It was very well known that there was almost a war between the Demon Hunters' Guild, and the Exorcists. Now, there were a few exorcists that this didn't apply to, Satan's twin children, well, Rin had been snatched up by Umika as a demon hunter, and their adoptive father. The French Chapter of the Sorcerers' Guild did not want Usagi going on a feminine wrath induced rampage on the idiot exorcists simply because she was one of the few people that could donate blood to the demons that needed it, either for blood pops, or directly from her.
Adrien, for his part didn't care if she just so happened to let demons snack on her blood, they all knew that she was his, and the only reason he hadn't claimed her fully were the stupid mortal consent laws. This was understandable to them demons that were in France, he wouldn't want a statutory rape charge on his record after all. In exchange for her allowing them to drink her blood, they would deal with the idiots whom went past the realm of bad taste. Idiots like Orochimaru in Naruto. Pedophiles and child abusers were killed outright, or gathered up so she could sacrifice them to the Basilisk she had found. As long as the Basilisk was fed she would leave Usagi, and those under her protection alone.
Once they find The Pharaoh both of them curse, " Set, let chaos reign supreme! " Ladybug intones.
" Bastet, let's show this idiot what feline fury is all about. " Chat Noir adds.
Parisians watching the confrontation from the safety of their homes blink, who would have thought Chat Noir worshipped Bastet while Ladybug apparently went in for chaos. They'd her cursing In Loki, Eris, and Susanoo's names previously. She only ever cursed in Amaterasu's name when well and truly pissed off. To the surprise of the Parisians watching the fight several things happened at once, every feral cat in Paris attacked The Pharaoh, and random things like lightning bolts without a cloud in the sky, sewer grates popping off and flying towards The Pharaoh...things like that just started happening.
Chat Noir and his Lady are cuddling on the top of a light post, Ladybug sitting on Chat's lap. One of the feral cats would bring the akumatized item to them when they had it. Until then they enjoyed the show while poor Dream Wolf and Drago Blaze were still dealing with the mummies that The Pharaoh had created. They were better at melee combat after all, and thanks to the fact that they got there so quickly Alya wasn't chosen as The Pharaoh's sacrifice to bring back Nefertiti, his so called lost love. Finding out that Ladybug had stopped the stupid ritual five thousand years ago was interesting though. Feral cats were yowling, hissing, and spitting as they leaped at The Pharaoh, all the while tree branches would randomly fly at him, one time a Himura Kenshin cosplayer was thrown at The Pharaoh, causing Ladybug and Chat Noir to laugh hysterically.
" This has to be one of our more entertaining fights, Orokana neko. "
" Agreed, My Lady, it's a damned fine show as well. " Chat says, nuzzling her neck.
Hawk Moth's Lair:
The evil Miraculous Holder is openly cursing the fact that apparently Chat worshipped Bastet of all deities while Ladybug was well known for worshipping the purveyors of mayhem. The mere fact that they had called on Bastet and Set, with the two deities actually responding meant The Pharaoh was being made to look like a mockery. His eyes scan another demon even as he divides his attention between the battle, and the demons Chat Noir had saddled him with. Never again was he pissing off Chat Noir to this extent. The poor fashion designing bastard kept having more of the demon sent his way. Apparently he had done something that had really pissed Chat Noir off. Either that, or Chat Noir wanted to keep the idiot busy so he didn't notice anything else outside of his work, and the demon.
Battle Site:
A Chartreux kitten with beautiful copper colored eyed, and wooly blue coat brings the akumatized item to them. Chat falls in love with the kitten immediately, and Ladybug sighs, " If you can get your new friend registered as a proper familiar with the French Chapter of the Sorcerers' Guild then you can keep the kitten, as long as the standard spells are applied as well, understood, Orokana neko. " This is said even as she purifies the akuma, and uses her Miraculous Ladybug power as well.
Chat beams at her, " Of course, My Lady. "
A representative immediately registers said kitten, having been present, just in case, and applies the standard spells to a collar of all things. Basically Chat's new familiar would have the same disguise field as the Miraculous Holders, or the senshi. Said familiar also turns out to be female, and Ladybug knows Chat will not want his new pet spayed. Well, maybe she could put in a call to Queen Felina of Mau, and get a male of a similar age to breed with Chat's new familiar. Chat does let all the strays know they can head for his true home, and act as rodent control, this was why so many were left on the streets after all. Ladybug has no problem with this, and it would appease Bastet as well. The pranks she had set up to hit her challenger would appease Set. Outside of Luna she honestly liked cats, and more importantly cats were also guardians to the underworld in Egyptian mythology, since Chat/Adrien worshipped Bastet, having a cat in the house would actually be a good thing.
When Ladybug teleported them home, Lune with them, she blinks when she sees a certain multidimensional troll that just loved pissing off Tsunderes. With him he had…" Is that an honest to chaos Kneazle? " Usagi asks after she de-transforms.
" Why yes, this fellow is, and more importantly, I've already taken care of all of Adrien's delightful pet, so he's registered with you as his owner, and he's your new familiar as well. " is the answer.
Usagi regards her fellow Troll, " What do you want? "
" To send you, and Adrien into a Harry Potter verse to give Dumbledore headaches as well as helping the Terror Twins cause even more chaos. If you manage to snag the CWL as well, and bring them back to your own dimension, that's bonus. Do this and I will send you two, to a Train Heartnet dimension. Oh, I'd also like you to unleash your delightful pet on Touko Aozaki. "
Adrien smirks, " I may be persuaded, yet. "
" Well, what do you know, you've got a good one here, Usagi-chan. How about I unlock your magical core fully. "
Adrien blinks, " Wait, I have a functioning core, like in Harry Potter. "
" Actually you'd qualify as a squib currently. "
" Teach me how to use the Kaleidoscope as well, and you have a deal. "
Wizard Marshall's Home Dimension:
Touko Aozaki feels IMMINENT DOOM coming her way, this felt even worse than the fanged pain in the arse she had to deal with all the time. Waver Velvet-El Melloi feels a shudder traverse his spine, and immediately places his strongest anti-chaos wards around his work area. Touko had no idea the fanged pain in the arse had met someone that was an even worse evil than he was, and the individual was willing to be an able cohort of said fanged pain in the arse. Had she even had an inkling of what was coming her way she would have foisted her job off on some poor sucker, and took a very long sabbatical.
Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon, Miraculous Tales of Ladybug and Chat Noir, or anything else that's copyrighted. Dream Wolf, Ryurix, and Kiba are the brainchildren of moonrose221.
