Dancing in the Moonlight

Dancing in the Moonlight

The next day Kyle didn't want to get out of bed and Matt had to keep pushing and prodding to get him going.

"It's summer and I'm still getting up early to go on shift or to your construction jobs. This sucks." Kyle complained as he tied his shoes.

"Well you could be in bed right now but you decided that running down to the pier without permission was the priority in your life so here you are. Now let's go. We're not going to be late." Matt stated pointing a warning finger at his son.

They made it on time but without much to spare. Father and son had not started off on the right foot and Matt was already debating about not giving Kyle his phone back, but thought he'd give the boy the rest of the rest of the day to straighten himself out. He knew it had been a long summer for him, but then again, he had brought it all upon himself. Matt had decided long ago that he would a raise a responsible child who understood consequences without expectations of life being easy when he strayed from what was right.

After the shaky start the day only got worse as the first call they were dispatched to involved a fatality of the home owner. They tried desperately to revive her, but she had just taken in too much smoke. Calls that involved the loss of any life were difficult to deal with and the house would often struggle for the remainder of the shift. And they had. Chief had just let them work through it, but it pained him to see them so miserable.

More calls came and went and Chief noticed that Kyle had kept his distance understanding the emotional turmoil of the day. This was one of the reasons he never had an issue when Matt asked of Kyle could stay at the house. The boy was perceptive and would always behave accordingly. By the time evening rolled around the mood hadn't lifted much and Chief wasn't sure what he would be coming back to after a quick errand and was pleasantly surprised when he walked into music and dancing along with a smiling crew.

He had heard the song many times before but hadn't expected to hear "Dancing in the Moonlight" at the firehouse much less see his gang dancing and smiling after all that they had struggled through during the day. But there in the middle, dancing with Sylvie was Kyle, who Chief was certain was the one who orchestrated this whole break from reality. He stood back and watched, a smile spreading across his face as Matt twirled Gabby around and then Kelly and Stella got in on the act. The others were moving and grooving as the song changed to another 1970's tune. His smile continued to glow as he felt the love of this family move through his veins. But finally, Kyle looked over and upon seeing him, raced over to his phone and shut it down.

"Sorry Chief. I didn't—we just—I brought my speaker from home—and I just thought that," he stammered.

"Kyle, it's okay. In fact, it was great and I'm glad that you brought your speaker and I'm also glad that you're here because I imagine that you are responsible for these smiles that I'm seeing. Follow me to my office young man," Chief said as he passed by. "Oh, and put that music back on."

Kyle blinked but complied using his Bluetooth enabled speaker to pulse out the music from his phone and queued up Lake Shore Drive. He then jogged to the Chief's office. He walked in and bit his lower lip as he looked up at his father's boss.

"Relax, you're not in trouble. Though I wasn't happy about the quick return due to inappropriate behavior I am happy that you are around, most especially today. You gave my people a gift. You were the one who initiated the dance floor out there aren't you?"

"Yes sir. I thought that they could use a distraction."

"I wouldn't even begin to think that you even knew of those songs much less have them on your phone."

"Guardians of the Galaxy."

"I'm sorry what?" Chief asked.

"A lot of the music is from the Guardians of the Galaxy movie. I try to explore all kinds of music. My teacher says it's the best way to learn."

"Well, I think she or he is right. Don't close the door on anything. Now go on and enjoy your little dance party and tell them to save a dance for me."

"I sure will. Thanks Chief." Kyle said as he bounced out the door and back into the fun.

Boden watched him depart and couldn't help but smile. That boy saved them more than he could ever know. His thoughtfulness, his youth, his promise of tomorrow.

Even though most wouldn't really admit to loving or even listening to most of the selections they all knew each and every song and sang along as they moved their bodies, losing the baggage that they had packed on during the shift. Kyle slipped back into the mass and just began to move with the crowd the smile returning to his face as he was surrounded by his firehouse family.

A couple of hours later Kyle walked into Matt's quarters.

"All ready for bed?" Matt asked.

"Yep," Kyle replied.

"Wash your face and brush your teeth?"

"Yes. Look my hair is wet by my forehead," Kyle said as he offered up his face.

"Teeth?" Matt asked again. Kyle smiled as if that somehow would prove that he had polished his pearly whites. "Okay, climb in bed and I'll be right there."

"I don't need you to tuck me in," Kyle declared, looking offended at the mere offer.

"Of course you don't," Matt said. "How about I come by and check on you in about ten minutes or so. Would that be okay?"

Kyle's face indicated that no such thing would be okay, but he grunted out "fine. Can I say goodnight to Kelly?"

"Sure you can."

The smile returned to Kyle's face as handed off his toothbrush to Matt and headed towards Kelly's quarters. The door was closed but he could see Kelly sitting on his bed looking at something. He knocked and swung the door open slowly. He looked to see what Kelly had in his hand and discovered it was a picture of Anna. "Oh, sorry. I shouldn't have come in."

"No, it's fine. Come on in. Going to bed?" He asked.

"Yeah. I hope you don't get a call in the middle of the night. Even though I don't have to get up it still interrupts my sleep."

"I bet it does," Kelly agreed.

"Thinking about Anna," Kyle asked as he nodded his head towards the picture.

"Yeah. I guess that call this morning got my emotions going."

"Yeah, I know the feeling."

"Oh?"

"The waves of sadness that come. They come a lot at first, but then lessen so that's good. But then they come when you least expect them and sometimes when you do expect them. But because its not as frequent you're not as prepared for them and they knock you over."

"Yeah, exactly like that," Kelly agreed.

"My dad never really showed much grief after my mom died. I mean I knew it was there, but somehow adults think that they can't show it to kids. But we need to see it, we need to know that our feelings have validity and by seeing your parent grieve it shows us that we can too."

"How old are you?" Kelly asked.

"You know how old I am. I've had a lot of therapy. I paid attention. You pick up things."

"I guess so."

"But yeah, it hits you in the gut, this pit of emptiness that you think will never go away and that nobody else understands. The world just keeps marching on, people going about their daily business, meanwhile you feel all alone and hollow. I feel like grief is what is left of the love that you weren't able to give, and it builds up inside you. Finally, it comes out in your eyes as tears, in your stomach so that you can't eat and in your face as sadness. It's just love that has no place to go.

"I was so happy that you had found Anna. But then I was worried that you were going to move to Springfield. I even checked out train schedules between here and there. That was kind of presumptuous of me since I didn't even know if you would want me to visit. My friend Joey's dad moved down there and he's on the train all the time. He says there's always delays because the freight trains own the tracks and the passenger trains have to wait for them."

Kelly was trying to keep up with Kyle's conversation. "Of course I would want you to visit," he managed to say.

"But then it didn't matter, and I felt so bad for you. You had just gotten through losing Shea and now this. Life just sucks."

"It isn't always easy that's for sure. How's your emptiness today?" Kelly asked.

"Better after we all danced. I turned the music on for you guys, but for me too. Sometimes we forget to be alive."

"You're right we do." Kyle stood there looking uncertain for a moment. "What's wrong?"

"Nietzsche once said that to live is to suffer. To survive is to find meaning in the suffering. Or something like that."

"You read Nietzsche?"

Kyle laughed. "No, just quote him. Whether we like it or not we're the survivors."

Kelly opened his mouth to say something, but then just grabbed Kyle and hauled him onto his bed and tickled him until Kyle begged him to stop. "Thanks kid."

"For what?" Kyle asked.

"For saying goodnight, for being here, for being you and for being just what I needed today."

Kyle shrugged and got up off the bed. "Goodnight man," he told Kelly who grabbed him and pulled him in for a hug and planted a kiss on his head.

"Goodnight kiddo."

Kyle disappeared, walking the several feet to his nighttime resting place as Matt stepped into Kelly's quarters. "Everything okay?" He asked.

"Yeah. Do you know your kid is quoting Nietzsche?"

"No I didn't."

"What are you paying that school?"

"A fortune," Matt replied.

"Well keep paying it," Kelly said with a smile.