Chapter 10 yay! This is inspired by watching the seek peek to the new SWR episode.
Two words.
MASTER YODA
I'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooo extremely excited.
So I'm talking to much. Here you go. Hope you enjoy.
EZRA POV
I went to my room with the knowledge that I will not be sleeping tonight. I was to distracted. Kanan. Darth Vader attacking me. I don't know for the life of me what made my mind weak anyway, I thought it was the nightmare but turns out that it was the already dead inquisitor attacking me, another reason I'm not sleeping ever again, I'm to scared, though I'd never admit it. But was it the death of my parents that had me shaken up, not getting to finish things with them. Was it that I actually reached out for kanan when I found out. That's more than likely it. I'm terrified to get hurt again, I can't put myself back together again not after last time. I can't do it again.
These thoughts didn't go very far past that because even though I had no intention of sleeping, the last several days have catched up to me. I fell asleep within minutes of hitting my pillow.
I felt as if I was falling...or flying? Then everything went still, I was on something that seemed to be the ground, I felt a very warm, extremely strong presents in front of me, so I looked up. I couldn't believe what, or actually who a saw.
"M..master Yoda? What are you doing here? Where is, here?" The place around me stared to become more clear, it looked like a temple, no way? It's the jedi temple.
"Ask to many questions you do. What are you doing here the question is."
"I'm sorry i..I don't understand." Why did he have to talk like that?
"Tell me, what is it you fear?
Now that I understood. But I didn't want to answer, so I gave my normal answer to that question.
"I'm not afraid of anything."
"Take me for a fool do you? Tell, knows all the force does."
No avoiding this.
"I'm afraid that I won't be able to control my power. I'm afraid of failure. I'm afraid of loss. I'm afraid of being abandoned again. I'm afraid of being vonrable. Some ones gonna hurt me...again.
"Ah...understand I do. Act on your fear will you?
"What do you mean?
"Make a decision you must, your path you must decide.
"So what do you want me to do, run to kanan and beg to sleep in his room? Why don't I just hand him a gun and say shoot me.
"Inside you much, much fear and anger.
"Can you blame me, everyone I get close and care about gets murdered right in front of me. And everyone I truth turns and stabs me in the back. So I don't turn my back on anyone now. It's the thing to do.
"Hmm?
"To use me.
"Trust the in the force you must. Knows all the force does, and lead you into truth it will.
"What does that even mean? And can we talk about the fact that I'm getting attacked? What weakened my walls anyway? What am I going to do? Help me!"
"Trust in the force.
...
And I was awake. Trust in the force. What does that even mean? I looked at my clock and saw that it was morning, eight, to be exact. I need to get up and see were the rest of the crew stands, I hope they come back soon. It's a little to convenient for them to be gone, with the ship all to our self, there's no way I'm getting completely out off this conversation with kanan.
Then I felt a push to that decision. It was that the force was telling me to do that.
Was that what Yoda meant when he said trust the force? Cause trust isn't really my thing. And I really don't like what the force is telling me.
I walked out of my room and into the kitchen were kanan was.
"Anything new on the crew?" I asked my voice horse
"No but they should be back tomorrow or the next day. Kanan said smiling at me
"How'd you sleep?" Kanan waited a second before saying. "Did you figure things out?
I stared at him for several seconds, then I did what master Yoda told me to do. "No." I said simply. I told the truth and that seemed to be what the force wanted.
"I slept Ok but shallow.
Kanan nodded and gave me some space waffles.
"Thanks.
There was an creepy silence that fell over us. I guess I showed the fear on my face cause kanan reach out and touched my shoulder and I instinctively cringed.
"Are you ok? Are you hurt?" Kanan asked
I knew the tears were coming, so I bolted my room.
I'm scared.
