Everything We Are - Chapter 11

by Kadi

Rated: M

Disclaimer: It's not my sandbox, I'm only visiting for a time.


There was something in the way that he looked when he slept. A peace settled over him that was rarely seen during his waking hours. The seemingly almost constant line that drew his brows together faded away. He would bury his face into a pillow, and with his arm thrown over his head, there was just something a bit carefree, almost boyish in it. He lay on his stomach, facing the middle of the bed. He had a knee bent, and drawn slightly forward. She hated to wake him. Not when he looked so peaceful, when he finally appeared able to rest. He only wanted to sleep for a couple of hours, just a nap, he'd said. He made her promise to wake him. Sharon drew her bottom lip between her teeth and considered whether his ire would be worth risking if she let him sleep. To her way of thinking, it might just be.

Beside him, sprawled on his back, was the child that looked and acted so much like him. Even lost in dreams their expressions were similar. Ian's head was turned toward his father, and he had an arm thrown over his head, while the other was draped limply over his father's arm. Andy had brought Ian up to tuck him away for his own nap, but neither of them were particularly ready to leave him alone in his room just yet. They weren't ready to have him out of their sight, just as he wasn't ready to be out of it. She worried that they were clinging a bit too much, but it hadn't even been twenty four hours since the entire ordeal began. Sharon didn't care. Let it be as it was, she decided.

Sharon tipped her head against the frame of the open bedroom door. She hadn't moved much farther than that for fear of disturbing them. Her arms were folded around herself, and despite the heat of the day, she wore her dark cardigan. She had hardly taken it off since getting home from the hospital the previous evening… only to sleep, or to shower. Her back still ached. They were both entirely too old for such antics. She wasn't sorry.

They were entirely too old for a lot of things they'd done since the start of this relationship. When Sharon chose to end one marriage she wasn't looking, expecting, or anticipating that she'd find another. She never expected Andy at all. He seemed to become important to her quite out of the blue. The rest was… well, it simply was. She could rarely make sense of her life these days, not that it was in any way unpleasant, recent events notwithstanding.

She continued to watch the sleeping pair in the bed, a small smile tugging at her lips. It was the heart's capacity to love that also held the capacity for such pain. Doubt. She did love. It filled her with warmth. It was an odd sort of light in the dimming years of life which were tumbling down the wrong side of fifty. It was worth it. Worth all the pain and the fear, and all of the doubt. How could it not be? Especially with them looking so peaceful, and perfect, and right.

Sharon was thinking that risking her husband's ire might just be worth sliding into bed alongside him for a little while. The body ached, it yearned for rest and solace. She pushed away from the door, intent on entering the room, but drew up short at the quiet summons that came from her left.

"Mom?" Ricky moved down the hall, cell phone in his hand and an almost sheepish look on his face. He held it out. "You still aren't answering yours unless it's work."

Sharon moved away from the bedroom door and accepted the phone. That was true. She and Andy were both screening their calls. They were receiving too many calls from news stations and reporters with requests for interviews. Family knew to call Charlotte or Ricky to reach her, and Nicole was calling Rusty. "Thank you honey."

"Mom, before you-" Ricky sighed, he never got the chance to finish.

She lifted the phone to her ear and moved further past him. "Hello?"

"Sharon."

Her breath hitched. That was unexpected, although perhaps not entirely. Her steps hastened and she moved to the end of the hall. There was a large window there, which overlooked the back yard. Her gaze zeroed in on the patch of flower garden not yet finished. She really needed to work on that. "Jack."

"Are you okay?" He was worried, and in his concern he sounded mildly aggrieved.

A small smile curved her lips. Sharon tilted her head. "Yes, I'm sorry. I didn't think-" Despite anything else which might have happened between them, separation, absenteeism, and finally divorce... they had once meant something to each other. Their children still connected them, even if Jack was an absent and somewhat questionable father. There was still too much history between them to expect that either could ignore it if something happened to the other. As was the case now.

The hitch in her voice was telling. Jack sighed. "Honey, don't do that." He hated when she cried, he always had. At some point she'd stopped crying where he could see it, and well... that was water under the bridge now. "I uh... I saw the news. They're saying you were assaulted? What is going on out there?"

Her throat cleared, and she smiled tremulously, despite his inability to see it, at the frustration in his tone. "We're okay," she repeated, with much more conviction this time. "Just a concussion. Jack, I don't really want to discuss details over the phone. I'm okay, really. It's a non-issue now."

He sighed, again. "What about him? Has he been to a meeting?"

Sharon smiled. They were friends once. Of course Jack knew his history. It was one they shared. Although, Jack had traded one addiction for another, Andy had actually worked on his recovery, and continued to do so. "Jack..." Again she didn't want to discuss certain details on a phone line which might, or might not be secure, given all of the interest in them at present. "He's okay, I promise. I know what to look for." It was a bit of a dig, but it would get him off the subject. She didn't feel too awfully bad about it.

"Yeah, okay." He got the message. "How is the squirt. News said you'd gotten him back?"

She looked skyward. "Squirt? Jack, honestly..."

"Hell, Sharon. You got remarried, you had another kid, what am I supposed to call him?"

Her lips pressed into a thin line, more to suppress a smile than anything. "How about his name? Ian is... he's doing well. It was an ordeal for him. Children are amazingly resilient, however. I'm hoping he's too young to remember. At the moment, he's a bit clingy, but then so are we. But physically he's perfectly fine."

"Hm." He grunted quietly. "That's good. What about the other one? The kid."

She shook her head. "Rusty is okay. I..." It was Sharon's turn to sigh. "He hasn't spoken to me yet. He isn't ready. He will."

"But you are okay?" He asked again, stressing it.

"Yes," she said more softly. "Jack, I'm fine. I promise, I'm okay. I can hardly turn around without one of the children hovering, and of course Andy-" She didn't finish that statement, because it would be somewhat cruel. "It's... you don't need to worry about me." She decided it was better to change the subject. "You spoke to Ricky? Charlotte is here too, you should-"

"She doesn't want to talk to me." Jack chuckled. "She's too much your daughter. Stubborn."

"Hmm." Sharon hummed. She suspected that was true. "Interesting. I always thought she got that particular trait from you."

"Funny." He huffed a sigh at her. "Look, Sharon, I gotta go. But I'm glad that you're all okay." He paused for a moment. "Do you need anything?"

She felt the sting of tears in her eyes again. "No," she said softly. "I have everything that I need right here."

"Yeah," he said a bit roughly. "I guess that you do. Take care, okay?"

"I will," she murmured. "Jack, thank you for calling." He said nothing else, and she sensed that maybe he wanted to. Instead, she heard the tell-tale click of the phone being hung up. Sharon sighed quietly as she drew it away from her ear. She studied it for a moment, and then she turned. Sharon wasn't surprised to see Ricky hovering at the other end of the hall, hands tucked into his pocket and looking incredibly uncomfortable. She smiled warmly at him, and held out the phone once she'd joined him. "It's okay honey. It was good that he called. I should have called him."

He tucked the phone back into his pocket. "It's a little weird, I guess. You're not married anymore, and even when you were…" Ricky glanced up at her and trailed off with another awkward shrug. "I wasn't sure that you wanted to talk to him."

Her smile gentled. Sharon lay a hand on his arm. "Before we were married, we were friends. Remember that, Ricky. You have to start somewhere, and it needs to be solid. Or else the passion that you think you feel will burn itself out, and there will be very little left." Her head tilted, and she thought for a moment. "Some things work out, and others do not. It wasn't all…" Sharon sighed, because her marriage wasn't something she had ever discussed with her children. She always maintained that it was none of their business. She wondered if that was the wrong approach to have taken. "Listen, honey. We had some very good years, your father and I. No matter what else might have happened between us, I will always remember that. He also gave me you and your sister. I can't regret it." Her hand moved from his arm to cup his cheek. "Okay?"

"Okay." Ricky grinned at her then, and it was the crooked, cheerful grin that he'd inherited from his father. "You look tired Ma, how's your head?"

"It's there," she sighed quietly. "I thought I might lay down for a while. Can you three entertain yourselves?" Nicole had taken the boys and gone home some time ago.

"I think we can give it a try." Ricky turned away from her. "I mean, if all else fails, we can play drown the sister. That's always a good time."

Sharon looked skyward. "Richard."

He chuckled as he walked down the stairs. "Relax, would you? We'd never drown her for real."

"Oh god." She pinched her nose and turned back toward her room. "I had boys. It had to be boys." Sharon shook her head as she walked, once more, into the bedroom. This time, she closed the door behind her. She leaned back against it and took a moment to simply breathe. Of course it had to be boys, and two of her favorites were still sprawled comfortably across the bed. After a moment, she pushed away from it and strolled quietly toward them. She toed out of her shoes and climbed onto the bed.

There was plenty of room behind her husband. She crawled in along the edge of the bed and slid up against his back. He started slightly, and she pressed her lips against his neck, just behind his ear. "Shh." Her arm slid around his waist and the length of her body was pressed against his long form. Sharon curled one of her legs through his and pressed her forehead against his back, between his shoulder blades. When his hand curled around her wrist and drew her closer, a smile curved her lips. Tucked in against him as she was, she let her eyes close.

In sleep, time had little meaning. When she woke again, it was to the feel of a feather light touch. The faint brush of fingertips against her cheek, and she felt her hair lifted away from her face. Sharon was laying on her back, a hand draped across her stomach. Her eyes fluttered open, and though her head ached, the severity was receding. When her gaze cleared, she found her husband looking down at her, head propped in his hand. A brow arched, one corner of his mouth twitched toward a half grin.

"You were supposed to wake me," he rumbled quietly.

"Hm." She hummed quietly, her brows lifted once, in a playful bob. "I might have fallen asleep before I could." A small smile appeared. It matched the glimmer in her eyes.

"Uh huh." He wasn't convinced. His other hand came up to sweep another wayward strand of dark hair from her face. His thumb caressed her cheek. Andy pushed his hand along her jaw until his thumb traced her bottom lip. He leaned down, but his lips only brushed the curve of her cheek. When she hummed again, a quiet sound in the back of her throat, his lips brushed her closed lids, one and then the other. He kissed the tip of her nose, and then finally, the barely there caress of his lips brushed over her mouth. "Hi," he whispered.

"Hi." She smiled up at him. Her fingertips brushed the curve of his jaw. Her hand circled his wrist and she turned her face into his palm. She hummed again before she leaned her head toward him.

His eyes were dancing in the dim light of the room. He watched her for a moment, let his eyes wander her face. She seemed more rested, but there was a wariness in her that would take time to heal. There was movement behind him and he arched a brow at her. Andy jerked a head toward the middle of the bed. Then he craned his head around to look at the little boy that was peeking up over his side. Then he glanced back at his wife. "Someone else woke me up instead." He watched her eyes move slowly toward the dark head that was now poking up over his shoulder. He watched her face relax completely, and the light shift in her eyes. The corners of her eyes crinkled happily, and when her lips curved, it was a soft, warm smile. She lit up completely, and yet there was a gentleness about her. Sleep mussed and tired, and so alive and lovely it always stole his breath. Andy lifted his arm and chuckled quietly when Ian launched himself over his body at Sharon.

She laughed when she caught him. "Well, hello!" Then she groaned when his little body collided against her. He was getting to be so big. She curled her arms around him and hugged him against her. His happy, high pitched laughter only made her smile wider. She kissed the top of his head, and then his cheek, and nuzzled his neck until he laughed and squirmed against her. She held him, just happy to be able to do so.

"Mama." Ian lifted his head and stared down at her, a serious expression on his face. "Up!"

Her brows lifted in amusement. "So demanding, little prince. How should we be asking?" His lashes fluttered. He lowered his chin toward his chest just slightly and looked up at her. It was a look so very much his father that she almost laughed again. Sharon pressed her lips into a thin line instead. "Hm?"

"Please?"

Beside her, Andy snorted quietly. "Yeah, when that one stops working kid, get with me, I'll teach you the other one." He rose and quickly, easily, maneuvered over his wife and off the bed. He lifted Ian and tossed him over his shoulder.

Sharon rose onto her elbows and shot a look at her husband. "I don't think you should be teaching him that."

Andy glanced back, and when she fluttered her lashes at him, he snorted again. "Yeah, I'm starting to wonder where you get it from," he told his son. "Pretty sure, it ain't all me."

She laughed, and after another minute, decided she was ready to follow them. He might just have a point, she thought. Sharon made her way downstairs while Andy took Ian to his room for the moment, and found her older children in the living room, standing around the television. "You know, there are seats. You could sit down. I think by now we're willing to allow it," she teased.

Rusty looked up, eyes wide. "Hey. We were about to come and get you."

She read his expression almost immediately. It was in the awkward way he held himself, the way he fidgeted nervously. The earlier warmth she felt faded, replaced by the cold chill of worry. "What happened?"

Charlotte and Ricky exchanged a look when Rusty didn't answer. "They found him," her daughter said.

For just a moment she didn't breathe. Then Sharon moved over to stand with her children in front of the television. She stepped between Rusty and Charlotte, and without realizing it, her hand slipped in to his. They had the volume turned down, but Sharon reached across Charlotte and took the remote out of Ricky's hand.

"…Breaking news this evening in the case of the kidnapped child of an LAPD police captain. For those of you who have not been following this case, early yesterday evening we received reports that the two-year-old son of members of the LAPD's elite Major Crimes Division was taken from his home after his mother, Captain Sharon Raydor, was assaulted during that incident."

The picture they chose to show was at least a fairly flattering one, she decided. She wore the blue dress with a black blazer, and was standing just inside yellow crime scene tape speaking with Lieutenant Tao. Well, at least she wasn't standing next to Amy, not that she was vain about such things as age. Sharon's lips pursed as they continued to recap the story.

"Since the kidnapping, police have been looking for this man, Daniel Dunn. Reasons behind the kidnapping and assault are unknown at this time, but this is the man that police considered to be armed and dangerous. During the very early hours of this morning, police reported that two-year-old Ian Flynn was found wandering abandoned in Venice Beach and had since been reunited with his parents. The manhunt which continued after the child's recovery continued until only minutes ago. We are told that members of the Major Crimes Division were able to locate Mr. Dunn and have taken him into custody. He was seen by reporters being escorted into LAPD Divisional Headquarters in downtown Los Angeles…"

They broke away to the recorded shot of Daniel being walked through a crowd of reporters, in handcuffs. Sharon drew a shallow breath and wasn't sure if she squeezed Rusty's hand, or if it was him squeezing hers. On the screen, Sanchez and Tao were flanking him, and he'd certainly looked better. His lip was split and there was a bruise on his cheek. Although Julio looked otherwise unruffled, she could see the quiver in his face, and the barely bridled rage that was threatening to break free. It made her wonder how Daniel had come to be bruised, but then, she also knew that if Julio had lost it, even for a moment, he'd be in much worse shape. She also knew that he wouldn't be anywhere near Dunn again. No, she trusted them, implicitly, to see this through. "Where's my phone," she asked quietly.

"I'll get it." Charlotte hurried to the desk in the corner of the room where her mother left it charging earlier.

"Thank you," she murmured, accepting it and sliding a finger across the screen in the same motion. There were several missed calls from Provenza, Sykes and Tao. Then a text, simple and concise, from Sanchez. We've got him. Stay home! Ma'am. Sharon almost laughed, polite even in writing. She began dialing quickly, even as her eyes tracked back to the television screen. She watched Provenza walking in behind the rest of the team, keeping an eye on them. As she dialed, he looked at his phone, and her brow arched at his sigh before he answered it. "You should be careful how you answer when you're being watched."

"Figured," he grumbled. "What do you care? This is always how I answer you, even in person."

That was true enough. Sharon's teeth scraped across her bottom lip. "You found him," she asked softly.

"Well, you're watching, what do you think," he snarked. "Of course we found him, you doubted us?"

"Not even for an instant." Sharon didn't want to see anymore, she walked away from the television, but not before turning it off. "Go and get Andy," she instructed the kids, and was unsurprised when Rusty moved away to do it. "How did you find him," she asked.

"How do you think? He's an idiot." Sharon didn't have to be watching him to know he was rolling his eyes at her. "He poked his head out long enough to get cash from an ATM, out of his own account. Only the dumbest criminals do that. The minute he did it, the alerts went up. We tracked him back to the sleazy motel he was staying in."

"Good work, Lieutenant." Sharon sighed. "Do I need to be worried about the bruising on his face?"

"He tripped," Provenza deadpanned. "Or rather, Sykes did. You know she gets a bit clumsy in her eagerness sometimes," he drawled, and she could almost hear the smirk. "She was taking him to the car, next thing I know, he's falling over. All very accidental of course."

"Amy?" At that, Sharon was truly surprised. Of course she suspected Julio, or even one of the uniforms. Maybe even Julio and the uniforms. Never Amy. "I see," Sharon decided to let it go, to allow him to handle it. She was hardly objective anyway. "I'll update Andy, you'll… keep me posted?"

"As much as I can," he promised with a sigh. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get inside. We have an idiot scumbag to question," he drawled, in an almost perfect imitation of his partner. "Rios is on her way over."

Sharon's brows shot up in a bit of alarm. "Hobbs was busy?"

"No," he said slowly. "I asked for Rios. Hobbs is good, don't get me wrong. She's probably my favorite, but… I didn't want finesse. I wanted a bulldog."

"Oh." Sharon didn't know what to say to that, and almost snickered. "Yes, well," she cleared her throat. "Let me know how that turns out, Lieutenant. Good luck."

"You can believe that I will." Provenza hung up before she could say anymore.

Sharon shook her head. She glanced up when Andy came down the stairs, looking concerned, and a bit furious. "They've got him."

"The kid said." His brows drew together in a deep scowl. "What happened?"

"He got stupid," she said. "Used his debit card at an ATM. They've got Rios." It was the abridged version, very abridged, but he was usually thankful for that.

"Yeah, but he's in custody." He almost didn't believe it. Andy moved to her side and folded his arms around her, holding her close. "Rios will deal," he said against her ear. "She won't put you through a trial. She's learned her lesson. Besides, she likes to deal. She'll get him to agree to the maximum and make him think it was his idea."

"Not if he lawyers up first," She whispered back. "Andy, he may not be that dumb. He isn't going to let us—"

"Then we go to trial," he said. "But they aren't going to let that happen. No one wants to put you or Rusty through that. They'll deal, trust them."

"I do." She leaned in to his body, into his warmth. "It's really almost over."

"Really, Sharon. Don't worry." Rusty stood nearby, holding Ian. "The last thing Emma wants is to have to deal with you or I being witnesses or in anyway involved in one of her trials again. Ever."

Sharon lifted her head and looked at him. She chuckled, partly relief, and mainly because she knew he was right. "I suppose she doesn't." She studied her boy, and could see that he was still a bit frayed around the edges. He didn't seem ready to talk about it yet, though. He would come to her when he was, she knew. "Well, since there is nothing that we can do about it," she decided. "Let's just not worry about it right now. We'll worry about it when we know what we're dealing with. Until then, what about dinner?"

"Chicken," Ricky said. "I have the grill going. And that vegetable thing that Andy likes. Rusty was going to make it."

"With my wild, rosemary rice," Charlotte said. "We were just about to get started." She shrugged. "We didn't want to wake you."

"Ah, so nice when they conspire to burn the house down," Andy drawled.

Charlotte huffed at him. "One little grease fire. You act like none of us can cook."

"Oh, you can all cook just fine," he pointed out. "Its when you do it together that scares the hell out of me. You get too wrapped up in torment the sibling."

Rusty and Ricky looked at each other and shrugged. He had a point. Charlotte, however, was too much like Sharon and would argue the point until they were both blue in the face. "You know," Ricky decided. "I think I'm going to see about that chicken right now."

"I think I'm going to help you." Rusty turned on his heel and decided it would be best if he took Ian with him, and did so.

Charlotte's hands were on her hips. Finally, she turned with a huff, flinging her hair behind her. "I'm going with them. You are impossible."

Sharon snorted. "Well, I've been saying that for years."

Andy rolled his eyes at her. "You were thinking it," he said, nodding his head toward the kitchen.

"Oh, I still am," she pointed out. "So go chaperone." She waggled her phone at him. "I'm going to call Gavin and have him get downtown. Just in case Daniel Dunn starts trying to wriggle his way out of trouble based on our convincing him to sign away his parental rights to stay out of jail."

"Good idea," Andy pointed out, although he didn't really see how it could work in his favor. It was another deal, just like a dozens they'd made. "Just, come running if I yell for the extinguisher."

She smirked at him. "I'll keep that in mind."

Andy looked skyward for a moment to ask for patience before he followed his stepchildren into the kitchen. Already the boys were attempting to get a rise out of Charlotte. "Oy," he muttered. Good thing they were awake, it was a grease fire in the making. Rusty was mostly giving it a half-hearted go. He just wasn't all with them at the moment, although, it was to be expected. Still, Andy had to give it to the kid. A couple of years ago he would have run off, stewed, and caused a scene. Instead, their boy was rolling his eyes at the elder siblings while entertaining the younger. He figured Sharon was probably right, kids were resilient, especially that one.