Summary of Chapter 10: Carla has her first dialysis treatment in hospital. Raking over the coals of Johnny's absence from her childhood, Carla and Johnny argue before she kicks him out of her hospital room. With Peter, however, Carla is able to be honest about her fears for the future. Meanwhile, Aidan is devastated when he isn't approved as a kidney donor due to concerns over his mental health. He breaks the news to Carla and vows he'll get the consultant to change their mind.
Chapter 11: Things fall apart
Peter opened the front door to the Victoria Court flat and helped Carla inside.
Leaning on Peter's arm, a weak and exhausted Carla limped to the sofa and sank down into its soft depths. Peter gently lifted Carla's legs off the floor and onto the sofa, arranged some cushions behind her back, and covered her body with a soft throw blanket. Carla smiled softly up at him.
"Thank you."
"You want a brew?"
"Please."
Peter put the kettle on and watched over Carla as she relaxed and closed her eyes. But her moment of respite was short-lived. The room was soon invaded by three lively beings: Jamie came running into the room, followed by Michelle, and then Snowy bounded in and immediately jumped up onto the sofa. After a moment of kneading the blanket covering Carla, Snowy curled up in her lap, purring contentedly, while Carla gently scratched the cat behind his ears.
Jamie was ecstatic to see Carla; she also climbed onto the sofa and exuberantly hugged and kissed her mum.
"Jamie, be gentle, okay?" Peter warned his daughter. "Come and help me make the tea."
Jamie ran to the kitchen to help her dad, leaving the two best friends alone.
"Hey babe, how you feeling?"
Michelle leaned over the sofa and kissed Carla fondly on the forehead.
"Exhausted. But with clean blood, so… overall I'm doing alright."
"I guess you'll be wanting some peace and quiet then?"
Michelle spoke loud enough for Peter to hear; she glanced over at him pointedly and saw him look back at her; she hoped he'd take the hint and leave.
"Chelle," Carla stroked Michelle's arm gently. "He's okay."
"Darlin', you need to rest," Michelle spoke in low tones now so that only Carla could hear. "You can't do that with him around."
"I want him here."
"Car."
"Chelle."
"Just be careful, okay?"
Carla laughed.
"Don't be so dramatic, Chelle."
"I know you. And I know the power that man has over you."
"Not anymore. There's absolutely nothing to worry about. Anyway, don't you have a bistro to run?"
Michelle looked at Carla for a moment; she was unconvinced. But she knew that nothing she said would make a blind bit of difference. Carla would do whatever Carla wanted to do.
"Call me if you need me."
"I will. Now get out of here."
Michelle kissed Carla again.
"Love you."
"Love you too."
Carla dozed lightly on the sofa. Peter sat in a nearby armchair, reading the paper. He turned the page carefully, but the sound of the paper rustling was enough to stir Carla. She opened her eyes; they flickered open and shut for a few moments before Carla managed to keep them open.
"Sorry, did I wake you?"
"Where's Jamie?"
"Playing in her room."
"Oh, right."
Carla coughed as she cleared her throat; her nap had left her with a croaky voice.
Peter jumped up from the armchair and, picking up a glass of water from the coffee table, knelt by the sofa where Carla lay and held the glass to her lips as she took a sip.
"Thanks."
Peter put the glass down, but he didn't move away from the sofa; he remained steadfast by Carla's side.
"Whatever you need, Car, you know I'm gonna be here, right?"
Carla looked into Peter's eyes and nodded; it was if their eyes were fused into each other's gaze. They couldn't look away, even if they wanted to. Right now, neither of them wanted to.
As if drawn by a magnetic force, Peter moved his face towards Carla's. He nuzzled her cheek gently before moving his lips to meet hers. For a moment, his lips grazed hers; it was a soft but intoxicating kiss. He parted his lips, hungry for more, but Carla pulled away from him.
"No, no, no, no. That wasn't a good idea."
"Wasn't it?"
"No, Peter."
Peter looked her in the eye, searching for something, a sign, an invitation to kiss her again. He didn't find it.
"I'll go check on Jamie."
Peter walked away.
"You do that," Carla was talking to herself now.
She reached up and touched her lips; the spot where Peter's had made contact only moments ago felt like it was on fire.
A knock at the door.
Carla tried to get up, but she was still very weak. She thought about calling out for Peter, but the memory of what had almost just happened stopped her. Instead she struggled to her feet and stumbled to the front door.
Carla opened the door and stood frozen in shock at the identity of her visitor.
"What are you doing here?"
"I was curious to find out why my girlfriend had packed up and moved to the other side of the country without telling me."
"Girlfriend?"
Unbeknown to Carla, Peter had re-entered the room. He immediately recognised the man stood in the doorway; the man he had seen kissing Carla in those holiday snaps.
Jamie, coming into the room close behind Peter, also recognised him.
"Sam!"
Jamie ran up to Sam, obviously excited to see him again.
"Hi, princess!"
Sam bent down and swept Jamie up into a hug. Jamie giggled as Sam spun her around, safe in his strong arms.
"I've missed you, gorgeous girl."
Peter looked on jealously at this man – this man who was calling Carla his girlfriend – this man who was embracing his daughter like he was her… This man wasn't her father. He was. Peter. This man had no right!
"So?" Sam turned back to Carla, waiting for an explanation.
"Not now," Carla begged Sam, glancing to where Peter was stood, a mixture of shock and anger rendering him temporarily speechless.
As if seeing Peter for the first time, Sam turned to him and held out his hand.
"Hi, I'm Sam. And you are…?"
Peter forced himself to take Sam's hand politely; inwardly he was fighting an almost overwhelming desire to smash this man's face in.
"Peter."
"Peter Barlow? You're Jamie's dad, right?"
"Yeah. I am." Peter was emphatic, making a point.
"Great to meet you."
"I should go," Peter decided to ignore Sam and spoke instead to Carla. "You've obviously got some catching up to do."
"Okay, we'll see you tomorrow, yeah?"
"I dunno, I might be busy."
Peter spoke coldly and didn't meet Carla's eyes, although he could instinctively tell she was desperately trying to make eye contact with him.
"Bye, sweetheart."
"Bye, daddy."
But Jamie was too engrossed with the new arrival to pay much attention to her dad.
Peter sidled out of the flat, suddenly deflated, trying to convince himself that the ache in his chest was no more than indigestion.
Carla stood for a moment, torn, her gaze flickering from where her daughter was holding court with her boyfriend – yes, he was in fact her boyfriend – and the door through which her ex-husband had just left without a word, without a look.
After a moment's hesitation, Carla rushed out of the flat in pursuit of Peter. She caught sight of him on the stairs, hurrying away from her home as fast as he could.
"Peter."
But Peter didn't waver in his step.
"Peter! Wait!"
Carla ran after him. She pushed herself, too much for someone in her condition. When she caught up with him, she grabbed a hold of his arm and didn't let go. For a while she couldn't speak; she took a series of deep, rattled breaths; she leaned on him, all her weight was on him as she struggled to breathe.
Peter melted momentarily at the sight of her. He reached out and stroked her cheek gently.
"You should be resting."
"I just wanted to…"
"What?"
"I didn't know he was coming."
"It's nothing to do with me."
"Peter, come on."
"Not one word, Carla. Not once did you mention you had a boyfriend. You let me think. I mean, we almost… You know what we almost did."
"Are you seriously getting pissed at me? Have you forgotten about your girlfriend? You do remember her, don't you? Toyah?"
"She's got nothing –"
"You've got a baby on the way, Peter."
"I know, but –"
"Do you think I've forgotten what you got up to while we were expecting a baby?"
"No, I –"
"You really think I'd do that to another woman?"
"Hey, hang on a minute. You can't deny that we had a moment before."
"I'm not denying it. Yeah, we had a moment. Until I pulled away. Because it was wrong, Peter. What would you have done if I hadn't?"
Peter couldn't, or wouldn't, answer.
"You haven't changed one bit."
Carla turned and walked away from Peter.
"Carla!"
"Go back to your family, Peter."
Carla leaned against the frame of her front door and watched Sam and Jamie playing with her toys. Sam was sat on the ground, fully invested in Jamie's imagination.
Carla couldn't help but think back to all the good times she'd had with Sam. Not just her and Sam, but Jamie as well. Sam had loved her daughter right from the beginning of their relationship; more than Carla could have ever hoped for with a partner that wasn't her daughter's biological father.
Sam glanced up at Carla and smiled. Carla smiled back.
She closed the front door, shutting out the rest of the world, and walked towards her family. She sat down on the floor with Sam and Jamie and joined in with the play, her heart full of an uncomplicated joy for the first time in a very long time.
She pushed the thought of Peter to the back of her mind; she knew that dwelling on what might have been would only lead to more pain for everyone. This was how things had to be. She knew it. And her heart? Well, her heart would learn to behave. In time.
