Hollywood Endings

DISCLAIMER: Tsubasa is not mine. Neither is "Breakfast at Tiffany's". If you think it is, then you need to see somebody…

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hello, dear readers! I had no ideas for this one; I only knew how it ended. Then I was walking home, thinking about the book New Moon, you know, the part were Bella and Edward watch "Romeo and Juliet" on the couch together? And this just hit me. Kuro and Fai were originally going to watch the same movie. Then I had another epiphany and thought of "Breakfast at Tiffany's". And it's such a perfect movie for Fai! He's just like Holly Golightly! If you have no idea what I'm talking about, don't worry. I'm an old movie junky.

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The rain was pouting down around the two lovers on the television. The man clung desperately to the woman. On the couch in front of the television, Fai was snuggled up, Kurogane's arms around his waist.

"I love this part!" Fai exclaimed.

"This movie is stupid." Kurogane answered him.

"Oh, Kuro-pi just doesn't appreciate romance!"

Yes that had to be it. It wasn't that the movie was as idiotic as the guy making him watch it. It was that he couldn't appreciate romance.

Fai started quoting the lines again. He'd been doing it the whole time. This movie was apparently his 'very favorite' as he put it. A romance, god, why a romance? Did the guy even have any concept of how effeminate he was? He had dragged his boyfriend to the couch when he found this movie on television, and forced him to endure hours of this dribble.

Fai sniffled a few times, in Kurogane's arms.

"Oi, are you crying?" Kurogane asked.

"No, but I am a bit choked up. I mean it's true love! This movie is so sad, but so happy at the same time."

"That doesn't even make sense." The dark man rolled his eyes.

"Yes it does. Its bittersweet."

"Whatever."

Kurogane settled in to watch the last few minutes of the monstrosity, Fai in his arms, cuddled as close as he could get. He was nodding off by the time the credits started to roll.

Fai's noisy clapping brought him back to the present.

"Brilliant, just the greatest movie ever! Don't you think, Kuro-wanko?" Fai said as he applauded.

"No. I already told you it was stupid." Did he have to repeat every thing he said? Couldn't Fai listen, for once?

"But, Holly Golightly is my favorite character ever!"

"Why?" Kurogane grunted. "She was nothing special. She only ever partied, and was too much of a moron to name her cat."

"And here I thought that Kuro-wanwan wasn't paying attention!" Fai grinned.

"How could I not pay attention, with you asking me if I was watching every five minutes!" The idiot was always doing that. Forcing him into something, then acting surprised when he did it. It was damned obnoxious.

"Kuro-chan is so cute! Anyway, I love Holly Golightly because she's so free. She isn't tied down to anything. She just lives her life how she wants." Fai became thoughtful a moment. "I'd love to live like that."

"But, she wasn't free. Her life was totally empty, idiot. Did we watch the same movie?" Honestly, Fai could be a moron sometimes.

"Hmmm. I guess not, Kuro-koi. I suppose it's a matter of perspective."

Perspective? Perspective could go to hell, as far as Kurogane was concerned. "She didn't deal with anything. She just ran away." Like you.

Fai didn't say anything a moment. Then his face became wistful. "I think she was really lucky. She found true love."

"I don't believe in true love." And Kurogane didn't. It was an idiotic idea that only women, and guys so girly that they practically were women, believed in. Guys like Fai.

"I do, Kuro-tan. I didn't always. But now…I think I do."

Kurogane could have read a lot into that statement. He could have. But he would not be doing so.

"Well it's stupid." Kurogane instead assessed the idea as he did everything, by declaring its idiocy.

"Kuro-pyon calls everything stupid." Fai said teasingly.

"I do not. Only things that are stupid, and that movie defiantly was stupid."

"I guess that's true." Fai answered.

Wait a second, what did he just say? Had he agreed with him?

"Kuro-myu doesn't call everything stupid. Sometimes, he uses other words, like idiotic, moronic, and dumb, and…"

Kurogane growled dangerously, and shut him up the best way he knew. Hell, the only way he knew, besides pouring a margarita down Fai's throat. He put his tongue down Fai's throat, and he thought it worked much better that the margarita would have. And since it did not result in drunken Fai, but did result in certain other situations, he preferred this method.

Within just a few minutes, he had Fai pinned on the couch, and things were progressing quite nicely toward those 'other situations' he'd mentioned.

Which was when the phone rang.

A mischievous look passed through Fai's eyes. Kurogane brought his gaze up to meet Fai's.

"Don't you DARE!" he said warningly.

"But Kuro-sama, it might be important." Fai answered gravely. And in one motion he shoved Kurogane aside, and leaped from the couch. Kurogane tried to grab him, but damn it if the guy wasn't ridiculously agile. Fai easily evaded him, prancing off into the kitchen for the phone.

Foreplay, and Fai would interrupt just to get the goddamned phone. And just to spite Kurogane. He had one twisted sense of humor.

Kurogane didn't even bother following him. Instead he turned and leaned over the back of the couch so he could see Fai on the phone in the kitchen. He knew what Fai would do, but at this point, he didn't really care. Thinking of infuriatingly colorful ways to answer the phone was one of Fai's favorite activities. He would often answer with things like:

"Suwa residence, lady of the house speaking." in a mock feminine voice.

Or with:

"Joe's New York Pizza, today's special buy two small one toppings and get a third small cheese free." in what was meant to be a New York accent. Kurogane had thus learned why Russians really should not try to imitate New York accents.

Today, Fai opted for a simple: "Grrr! My name is Kuro-scary. What do you want?" He made sure he was facing Kurogane, so he could grin impishly at him.

Fai's eyes suddenly widened, as whoever was on the line answered him. His grin dropped completely from his face. He turned away from the Kurogane.

"Yes, this is he. Look, I can't talk right now, ok? Ummm…call later; I'll give you my cell number: 404…9…38…499…2, got that?" Fai paused a minute as the person on the line evidently answered. "Yeah, got it. T-thanks for the call." With that, he hung up.

What the fuck had that been about? Kurogane didn't think he had ever seen his lover so restrained before. He had heard whoever was on the line and become serious in no time flat.

"Who was that?" Kurogane asked. Fai faced him again, that flawlessly simulated smile back in place.

"Nobody, Kuro-san. Just an old friend. And I didn't think now was a good time to talk." That smile turned seductive as he sauntered back over to the couch. "I wanted to get back to what we were doing."

Kurogane wasn't about to be fooled.

"No," he challenged Fai, "if it was an old friend, you would have talked about twenty minutes, just out of your sick humor. Who was it?"

"Kuro-pyon, truly it was no one." Fai tried to sit a top Kurogane's chest and continue their previous actions, but Kurogane wouldn't allow it. He sat up, pushing Fai off of himself.

"What was that?" he demanded again.

Fai it seemed, decided to ignore the question. "Is Kuro-sexy not in the mood anymore?"

"No." was all he would say, before stalking off in anger and irritation.

END NOTE: Thanks for reading, please review.