Well, here we are. The epic conclusion to a work that has taken nearly five months of my life. In fact, if I had any more Requiem texts to go between Lux Aeterna and Libera Me, I'd probably split this up too, but this has certainly become the chapter to end all the chapters. So please, enjoy this final installment of "The Sanity of Insanity; or, How Kaori Aida Lost Her Mind."


XI. Libera Me

Libera me, Domine, de morte aeterna,
In die illa tremenda,
Quando coeli movendi sunt et terra,
Dum veneris judicare saeclum per ignem.
Requiem aeternam dona eis, Domine,
Et lux perpetua luceat eis.


The day for the unveiling of the grand, new statue came two days later amid a lot of fanfare, with delegates and honorary guests coming from all over the country to attend the proudly solemn occasion, while throngs of civilians had also come to see what the big deal was all about.

Considering what the statue was supposed to be representing, it was actually fairly simple in the end. It consisted of a beautiful, angel-like figure of a woman holding her hands high towards the sky with a sadly distant and pleading look in her marbled eyes, while her ethereally flowing gown was ruffled in the wind as if it was made of air itself. Below her was a sphere, which apparently was supposed to represent the Earth, but which looked more like a ball of putty than anything else. And finally, perched on the angel's outstretched hands, was a single, sculpted white feather, while the pedestal had a plaque saying "For the memory, and for the future".

Kaori wasn't wholly impressed with it. She had seen similar statues before and this didn't seem to have much in it to cause that much excitement or wonderment or sorrow in her opinion. A political move if ever there was one and not executed with much élan... certainly not with the same deep intention as her Requiem. For heaven's sakes, to make matters even more trivial to her, they had even hired a brass band to entertain the loitering crowd in the ceremony, a downright slap in the face for Kaori, who had pictured the moment to be something much more profound than this carnival atmosphere the deciders were obviously wanting so as not to cause too many bad feelings.

Chihiro, standing next to Kaori, could see the irritation in her friend's countenance and tried to calm her down before she did something drastic.

"Easy there now, tiger," Chihiro said.

"Of all the insensitive things they could do, they got some stupid village band of triviality to play attendance. I'd have a good mind of taking my work and just walking away..." Kaori muttered in anger.

"Don't worry, everything'll go just fine. I mean, who else is going to take this occasion down into the pits of misery if not you? I'm sure everyone will just adore your work, just you see," Chihiro tried to soothe her friend... even as the excuse was not really what she thought of as encouraging. "Hehe... umm, wouldn't you agree Mikuru?" she asked the assistant beside her.

"...Hai..." she responded with apparent disinterest while glancing at the statue in visible boredom, causing Chihiro to give her a disparaging face.

Surprisingly, Chihiro's pep-talk seemed to work, though, and Kaori relaxed a bit. "Yeah, I suppose so... Not that that'd be much of a challenge. This crowd would most likely shed buckets of tears even if I just told them the story of Pinocchio…"

"Ehehe… Well…" Chihiro started, but was interrupted by an unexpected voice behind them.

"Kaorin-san?"

Snapping out of their thoughts, the group turned around only, to their utter surprise, to come face to face with the smiling face of none other than Chiyo Mihama, now decidedly grown up since they had seen her last. She still wore pigtails, but they were more accommodating of her longer hair than the odd, bobbly things she used to have, and even though she was already a full-grown adult, she still had that inimitable air of cuteness about her.

"Hey, Kaorin-san! I thought I recognised you," she happily greeted as she approached her old friends.

"Chiyo-chan," Kaori greeted her with a happy smile.

Chiyo quickly gave a big hug to both Kaori and Chihiro and continued, "It's been such a long time! How've you two been?"

"Fine," they lied, and quickly directed the topic on Chiyo, "What about you? I wasn't expecting to see you here. I though you were in America," Kaori said.

"Oh, I was, but I came back here for about a month or so to visit my family and, at the same time, friends. You know, I've kinda missed all of my old friends, and I've been thinking of arranging a get together. Then I heard about this event, and saw your name attached to it, so I thought that'd be the perfect opportunity, so I pulled some strings and got everybody else here as well," Chiyo finished with a bright smile.

"Wow, you have some influence, Chiyo-chan," Chihiro wondered.

"Ehehe..." Chiyo embarrassed.

But she didn't have a lot of time to be that way as suddenly somebody attacked her from behind, accompanied by a boisterous "Heya there, Chiyo-chan!", the force of the bodily greet almost knocking the young woman down.

Regaining her senses, it didn't take a genius to guess who took such a brutal greeting to heart. Turning around, Chiyo was immediately faced with the wide grin of Tomo Takino.

"Hey, Tomo-san," she said with an expression devoid of any enthusiasm she had previously been feeling.

Tomo just gave her the thumbs up and loudly stated, "How ya doin'?!"

Chiyo didn't have any time to answer before Tomo changed her attention to "KAORIIIIN!!! You haven't changed a bit! And neither have you... umm... ah... you... eh..." Tomo stumbled from her not really remembering Chihiro at all.

"Chihiro..." Yomi whispered, who had now reached the rest of the group along with... Sakaki.

Kaori noted the presence of her obsession, but if her presence had an effect on her, she was doing a good job at hiding it. Chihiro noticed it too, but she didn't really have much time to reflect on that as Tomo over-rode every other consideration as quickly as it arose.

"Yeah, that's what I was about to say," Tomo continued with renewed energy, "Hey Chiciro!"

"Chihiro..." she mumbled, dejected.

"Yeah, that's what I said!" Tomo lauded back amid a lot of eyerolling from the others, only to chance to lock her eyes on Mikuru, who was silently gazing at the energetic woman with apparent confusion. "My God! You have enormous breasts! Bigger than Kagura's!" she pointed in shock, causing an uncomfortable silence to drop over the group, not least because Tomo didn't even know Mikuru was associated with Kaori in the first place.

"What was I expecting..." Kaori mumbled to herself. "Everybody, this is my personal assistant, Ayanami Mikuru," she introduced the girl who's face had taken the shade of at least fifteen different hues of red.

"A personal assistant? Jeez, Kaorin, you must be loaded!" Tomo exclaimed.

"Why yes, Tomo, I am," Kaori said as deliberately as possible with a smug grin on her face. "I mean, when living in a mansion, one does need an assistant."

As expected, Tomo's eyes went wide and her mouth gaped open, causing Kaori to give a devious chuckle at being able to give a little bit back to Tomo for all those times Kaori had ended up being ridiculed by Tomo's antics.

"Anyway, it's a beautiful statue, isn't it?" Chiyo quickly piped up with a small nervous laugh to get a more proper conversation going.

"Yeah, it looks really good," Yomi quickly followed in Chiyo's mode of thinking. "It has a sort of ethereal beauty to it, wouldn't you say?"

"Hmph, it's a statue," Kaori dismissed the thing with contempt once more.

"Oh... it is, isn't it... eh he he..." Chiyo tried to say something, but not really knowing what to say when seeing Kaori's face.

"It seems... lifeless," Sakaki suddenly dropped into the conversation out of nowhere.

"Yes, it does," Kaori was quick to agree, much to Chihiro's wariness. "It's pretty and nicely sculpted, but it doesn't have a soul."

"No... it doesn't. It's cold and... not very cute. It doesn't really conjure any sense of emotion," Sakaki said with a blush.

"It's about as dead as the people it's supposed to be honouring," Kaori quipped causing a nod from Sakaki, while the others were more or less either embarrassed for apparently not having thought deeply enough about the subject to say anything more analytically critical about it, or bored about the whole thing like Tomo.

"Sakaki-san, I didn't know you were so observant about art," Kaori continued, feeling a strange mix of calmness and butterflies at the same time when being confronted by Sakaki again after such a long time.

"Mmm. I'm not really that familiar with sculpting, to be honest. That's just a way this particular one strikes me. I'm more into painting, actually," Sakaki said as she eyed the statue.

"Painting?" Kaori asked with interest.

"Ah... hai. Nothing big or anything like that. Just something small. It's a nice hobby," Sakaki responded.

"Cool! You know, Mikuru here does some painting too," Kaori said while turning to Mikuru's side.

"Hai... Nothing big, though. Just something small. I find painting very relaxing," she responded laconically as usual.

"Mmm... it is... very harmonious," Sakaki agreed.

"Yes. Most therapeutic," Mikuru agreed, as well.

"Mmm," they both nodded, while Kaori was beaming like sunshine beside them.

Chihiro in the mean time felt like she had suddenly been transported into the Twilight Zone. All of a sudden it just hit her how totally surreal it was to see Sakaki and Mikuru talking to each other. She had never before realised how much they actually resembled one another, until now that they actually faced each other. They didn't particularly look alike, but their reticent personalities were like mirror images, making Chihiro think whether there were ulterior motives for Kaori to have hired Mikuru in the first place.

Next to her, Tomo had lost all interest in what was happening around her and had started to tease Yomi about how fat she was and how her boobs were just getting bigger and bigger by the year so that soon she'd have serious problems staying vertical, while Chiyo was busy trying to keep Yomi from killing Tomo.

And finally, there was Kaori in all smiles and animatedly talking of art and stuff like that with Sakaki as if the past few months had never even happened. In fact, Kaori was seeming a little too comfortable with Sakaki to Chihiro's liking.

"Damn it if she's falling for the lure of Sakaki again. I have to do something. I've worked too damn hard for it all to be for nothing,"she thought anxiously before saying out loud, "Ah, Kaorin! Isn't it getting a little late? I mean, shouldn't you be off to see about the arrangements for the concert?"

Flipping her pocket watch in her hand, she noted, "Oh, you're right, Chihiro. I really should be going," she said as she turned to the rest of the group and continued, "Hey, it's been real great seeing you again, but I really must run off. So I trust I'll see you later this evening?"

"Of course, Kaorin-san. Wouldn't miss this for the world," Chiyo happily bobbed as the rest of the group said their see-you-laters.

- O -

Once having walked a safe distance away, Chihiro gave Kaori an angered look.

"What?" Kaori asked as she noted her friend's face.

"I can't believe you Kaorin," Chihiro began. 'Oo, Sakaki-san, I didn't know you were so observant of art, and oh, you paint too', Chihiro mimicked. "I mean seriously."

"And what exactly was that supposed to mean?" Kaori asked with a hint of irritation in her voice.

"You know very well what it means. It's about you fawning all over Sakaki again. Haven't you learned anything from these past months?"

"Fawning? I wasn't fawning. I was having a normal, civilised conversation."

"Oh, yeah. And that's why you were smiling like a 500 watt lightbulb?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know smiling was somehow forbidden. What would you have me do? Pout all day long?" Kaori said with heavily seeping sarcasm.

"Well, that's what you usually do..." Chihiro mumbled.

"I do what...? What the heck is the matter with you all of a sudden? ...Agh, I don't have the time or interest to get into another argument with you, Chihiro, so you might as well drop it. Seriously, sometimes I don't get what your problem is," Kaori said as she shook her head in frustration.

"Yeah, well, that's not the only thing I 'have a problem' with, either. What about Mikuru then, huh?" Chihiro shot at Kaori.

"What about Mikuru?" Kaori asked in confusion.

"Come on. Don't give me that. I'm not blind, you know. Don't think I didn't see that Mikuru is almost exactly like Sakaki!"

"What?" Kaori glared at Chihiro in bewilderment.

"Isn't it true you hired her just because she reminded you of Sakaki? I mean it's so obvious that it almost hurts. They're both silent, stoic, uncomfortable with themselves and now they even paint! Just face the truth, will you. Mikuru is Sakaki!"

"Huh?" they suddenly heard from behind them, noting that Mikuru had heard it all and had now stopped walking, her face in shock. "M-m-mistress...? Is... is that... true? You only hired me because I... reminded you of that other woman? Not because I was... good or... or all those things you said," she said, almost on the verge of tears.

"Ugh, now look what you did, Chihiro," Kaori said exasperated. "No, it is not true!"

"It's not?" Chihiro countered.

"No! And I can't believe you'd think that. I don't see Mikuru as any kind of substitute. She's the best worker I've ever had and I consider her a dear friend. She's nothing like Sakaki-san; not even close," Kaori vehemently stated.

"I'm... I'm not?" Mikuru said with a feeble voice.

"No. No you're not. You are much better," Kaori said looking straight into the girl's downcast eyes that now shot up to look straight into Kaori's. "My intentions have always been pure and truthful. I don't see you as a Sakaki-san clone, but as Mikuru, a trusted person in my home and a member of my family. And Chihiro shouldn't have insinuated that I'd feel that way about you. Don't ever think my thoughts of you are contradictory to what I've said to you before.

"And Chihiro," she continued, turning to her friend, "I can't believe you would even suggest such a thing. As if I'd try to replace other people not in my life with some sort of carbon copies? Don't you know me at all? Regardless of how I've been in the past, never have I even considered using other people in such a cheap way. Never. And I never will. Chihiro... is that really how you see me as being? That I'm that selfish? I... I thought you were my best friend," Kaori finished with sadness reflecting in her eyes.

Now it was Chihiro's turn to feel ashamed. Sometimes she felt that she could just kick herself, and this was definitely one of those times. Kaori's words seemed to hit her like a ton of bricks and they weren't making her feel very good about herself or her suppositions. She didn't mean for it to come down like that, but obviously she should have thought better about what she said before opening her big mouth. "Kaorin... I... I..."

Taking a deep breath, Kaori calmed herself down to keep talking in a more controlled voice, "Chihiro, you still have doubts about me? That I'd throw myself at Sakaki-san at the first chance I'd get? Well, to be honest, it is a rather enticing idea... but hardly realistic. I have thought about this a lot lately and I've done a lot of soul searching to know that it is so. I know it's nothing more than a hopeful fantasy and nothing more. But you still don't trust me, do you?"

"No, it's... it's not that. I'm just... I'm... I worry about you. That you'll loose your head again... and... maybe the next time will be..." Chihiro said her head bowed down.

Kaori smiled a little at that, and placed her hand on her friend's shoulder, saying "You know, I'm a big girl now. I can take care of myself. You don't have to continuously worry about me. As long as I still have your friendship, everything'll be just fine. You know you are my supporting pillar... you've always been and you always will be. Please, don't doubt my sincerity. Just, trust me a little more, will you," she finished with an affectionate smile.

Chihiro granted herself a smile and just nodded, saying a small "Sure."

"That's better. Now, what say we go get this sucker over and done with?" Kaori asked.

"Okay," Chihiro answered as the three women resumed their walk towards the church in a much relieved atmosphere.

- O -

After the festivities following the grand unveiling were completed, the invited crowd then moved to the church for the second part of the programme: The Grand Mass for the Dead for chorus and large orchestra, Opus 32. As Kaori had instructed, the church was fairly dark with mood lighting creating a soft haze of yellowish light to set everybody in the right frame of mind and away from that cheerfulness outside. This was supposed to be a moment of solemnity and mourning after all.

The church was already filling up quite nicely and it was expected that the place would be completely filled up with not only the main "important" people, but also a number of music connoisseurs, critics and the odd assortment of other people who had been either invited there or who had been lucky enough to get seating tickets, such as Chiyo and her old high school friends, including Osaka and Kagura now too, who were all seated near the centre of the hall. Tomo, of course, didn't want to go there to listen to some "boring violins and other lame stuff", but Yomi had persuaded her to attend as well:

"You will go, or I'm gonna really loose my temper!!!" Yomi yelled at the top of her lungs.

"You sound just like my grandmother," Tomo said with a smile, after which Chiyo, Sakaki and Kagura had all been needed to keep Yomi off of Tomo.

The musicians had already assembled on the makeshift stage in front of the altar while the chorus was elevated on a slightly curvy fan-like pedestal, and the extra timpani was then laid out on the balcony area above along with the organ. The immense forces Kaori desired seemed a bit cramped where they were seated, despite the largeness of the place, but there was still enough space to afford enough movement for the players to not having to resort in making compromises.

Chihiro, who was seated near the edge of the stage with Mikuru, was nervously sweating in her seat. This event was finally the moment this whole ordeal of the past months of torture had been leading up to. This moment would determine the outcome of Kaori's future and, to a certain extent, her own as well. Whether this will make or break Kaori was yet to be seen, and Chihiro certainly wished with all her might it would be the former.

After everybody had been seated for around five minutes since the last members of the audience had meandered to their places, the lights dimmed further to only leave the stage still illuminated, after which the doors behind the orchestra immediately slammed open to reveal a determined and grim looking Kaori walking up to the podium through the stage as the crowd began their welcoming applause.

Stepping up on the podium, Kaori gave a quick glance to the audience, giving a few small bows in their direction, while letting her eyes roam a bit amid the attending people. While so doing, her eyes momentarily stopped at the sight of a certain raven-haired woman in the crowd, something that Chihiro didn't fail to acknowledge, but to her surprise, Kaori then turned her head to look straight into Chihiro's and gave her a warm smile. Chihiro didn't quite expect that, but she didn't really have time to mull over it as Kaori turned around to face the orchestra and prepared to begin the performance.

The crowd went silent, and the air noticeably tensed up in expectation.

Then, Kaori raised her hands to gently sway for the setting of the simple 2/2 beat and espressivo melodic line, the cellos and basses started to lay down a soft carpet of a mournful G minor melody that would become the main theme of the movement, soon to be followed by a lone French horn to intone the idea with more prominence, enticing the listener to descend into a world of solitude. To this the violins, the woodwinds, the brass, and the percussion soon joined one after the other in rising musical emotiveness as the chorus then entered with their first "Requiem aeternam dona eis, Domine..."

From here on the work continued in a variety of different emotions, but always keeping the emotional heart of the setting in mind. Even beyond the more tumultuous moments that teetered in the way of the horrors of humanity's greatest fears, Kaori had never allowed herself to forget the very essence of the human soul, as seen in the horrified, repeated whispers of "Kyrie eleison" following the initial movement, creating an uneasy plea for mercy.

The advancement of the Dies Irae then came like an atomic explosion of apocalyptic proportions after the more psychologically expressive music as Kaori opened up the terrors of the Day of Judgement to all the listeners with heavy brass and terrified proclamations from the chorus. And underlining it all was the large concentration of timpani spread about the balcony area where they played counterpoint to one another and mirrored each other in stereo over the anxious chorus and orchestral fury, before finally all ten pairs converged to play in unison, sending waves of trembling sound hurling over the audience seated in utter captivation and horror. Kaori certainly wasn't about to let her work be ignored and the ensuing Tuba Mirum fanfares were truly awe-inspiring as was the almost shattering silences of the Quid Sum Miser intermingling with sighing English horns when the terrors finally subsided.

After the following, triumphant Rex Tremendae and the serene Quaerens Me, the heartbreaking Lacrymosa had, as expected, made more than one person break into tears, and Kaori was leading her ensemble down with the most expressive use of her body to accentuate every expression of emotion she had spent in writing the work. She stomped, she moved her hands about energetically when ever needing more force, her face expressed about every single emotion she could call forth, and the choral singers and orchestral players responded admirably to all her intentions. When the Lacrymosa was succeeded by the easy-flowing harmonies of the Offertorium that Kaori had been improvising on the piano all those months ago, now in its fully orchestrated magnificence and framed into a complex triple fugue that still seemed deceptively simple, it was enough for Chihiro to feel her heart almost exploding with the warmth of how the same music had made her feel previously in its more sparse form.

The final movements of the eerie Hostias, in which flutes and eight, very deeply played trombones played some disconnected and offsetting chords as accompaniment to the chorus, creating a vacuum of insubstantial fear and trepidation, the heavenly Sanctus with its sole moment for a tenor soloist to play a heavenly host, the heartfelt F minor Agnus Dei that eventually modulated to the main key of D flat major for a magnificent conclusion complete with ethereal organ, and finally the majestic Libera Me that reprised the main ideas of the preceding movements, brought the 85 minute mass to a final, heartbreaking close as the entire score descended into pianississimo quietness, the orchestral sections one by one going silent, finally leaving only the chorus quietly intoning "Requiem aeternam... Requiem aeternam..." before falling silent under the lone beat of a single timpani.

When the music ceased, Kaori was visibly tired. She had during the performance truly lived the music and everything had come straight from her heart. And now that it was over, she was entirely spent. All she could do was to bow her head down and remain completely still, not making any effort to move from where she was, while at the same time trying to catch her breath.

But Kaori wasn't the only one not making a move. The concert audience was likewise silent, stunned and emotionally exhausted. None dared make a move or dared to give applause lest they should do something irrevocably bad. What had begun as a fun event to many, had in the end turned into something more like a day of lamentation for all involved. Even Tomo was left without words for the first time in her life, and Sakaki was reduced to tears.

After nearly two minutes of utter silence, Chihiro then finally stirred and, seeing Kaori still hunched over the podium, got up and ventured towards her. She didn't quite know if it was such a safe thing to do, but she had a feeling she needed to do something. Approaching Kaori's figure, she noted how tired she looked, as if she had just had another ten years thrown over her within the matter of just a little over an hour.

Taking hold of her arm, she whispered, "Kaorin..."

As if suddenly shocked out of whatever world she was lost in, Kaori's head snapped up and her wide eyes focused on Chihiro's face.

After a moment of just staring at each other, Chihiro quietly continued, "Kaorin, are you all right?"

It took a while for Kaori to register what Chihiro had just said before letting her body relax a bit and then turned towards the audience still sitting in silent attendance. Kaori gave a small bow to them, then a similar gesture towards the musicians, and started moving away from the stage, still in complete silence, accompanied by Chihiro closely by her side.

It was only at that moment that the audience seemed to snap out of their stupor and the few scattered claps of people soon turned into roaring applause, whistling and shouts of bravo as people were standing up to show their utter admiration.

Halted by the sudden noise, Kaori stopped and turned her head towards the people, who were so openly showing their appreciation. Tomo, of course, again proved to be the loudest of the lot with her shouts of "ALL RIGHT, KAORIN!!!" as she was pumping her fist in the air while standing on the chair next to Yomi looking increasingly more embarrassed beside her. It was enough to cause a small smile to form on Kaori's face, which she then followed with a few more pronounced bows and signs of appreciation towards her singers and players who had made the whole thing come alive.

When she continued her journey away from the stage, she gave a quick glance towards Sakaki at the same time. It was there that she finally laid all of her doubts to rest. In the past she would have probably made a proper mess of herself in the presence of Sakaki, but now all she could see in her was a person that aroused nothing more than nostalgic sentiments of old feelings never to be fulfilled. A friend, but nothing more.

Indeed, as much as the Requiem was the greatest and most personal work she had ever produced, it was at the same time the requiem for the old feelings she used to harbour towards the long-haired goddess and which now seemed but insubstantial daydreams of an immature mind.

- O -

As the barrage of headlights of the Mercedes cut through the night, Kaori and Chihiro's trip back to the mansion unfolded in silence. Not a troubled silence, but still a silence that invited no interruption. It was as if saying anything would have been the troubling element in this scene. Kaori was obviously deep in meditation, only watching the unfolding scenery of the already darkened night shoot past in solemnity, her head leaning on the glass.

After the performance Chiyo had come and given her most enthusiastic congratulations and suggested the whole group should go celebrate, but Kaori had quickly excused herself due to her not having any energy left to do anything else past that performance, and promising that tomorrow she'd most likely feel a lot better so they could see each other then if possible. Chiyo, of course, was the very definition of understanding and didn't even attempt to keep Kaori back any further, and thus the tired woman was escorted out by Chihiro and into the car that was situated near by so as to get back home as soon as possible.

During the drive, Chihiro was not quite as lost in her thoughts as Kaori, but felt that it might not be a good idea to disturb her friend at this moment. The performance certainly had taken its toll, and the best course of action seemed to be to just let Kaori snap out of it on her own, though at the same time it was making Chihiro slightly worried that the Requiem might have left some kind of psychological damage in its wake.

As the car rounded its way to the front yard of the mansion and came to a stop next to the front door, Kaori was quick to jump out without even waiting for Mikuru to come and open the car door for her. Striding quickly to the front door, she entered without uttering a word and headed straight towards the backyard.

Chihiro quickly followed, feeling the need to be concerned for Kaori at this fragile period and not wanting to leave her out of her sight. As she reached the backyard where she had seen Kaori rush off to, she stopped as she saw her friend once more standing with her back towards the house, staring at somewhere far off.

"I really would like to know what exactly she's always looking at when she's out here,"Chihiro thought.

Taking a few tentative steps towards Kaori, Chihiro soon stopped her advance as Kaori unexpectedly spoke up, "The demons are not here tonight..."

"D-demons?" Chihiro freaked. "Okay, scratch that. I don't want to know!"

"The whispering has ceased... Probably not gone forever, but at least they're not there now... Ah, kami-sama, it feels good... it really does feel good," Kaori said in a very relieved tone.

"K-Kaorin? Are you alright?" Chihiro asked as she advanced towards her a bit more.

Kaori just turned around and revealed a big, bright smile on her face, a smile that felt so open and happy, that Chihiro was almost shocked by the sudden transformation. "Yes, I'm fine, Chihiro. Ever for so few a times this good," Kaori beamed back. "Better, than for such a long time I can barely remember."

The smile of Kaori's was so sincere, that it was causing Chihiro to break into a smile too, evaporating all the worries she had been harbouring all day long, like a valve releasing the bent up pressure from her brain. It also brought about a slight feeling of embarrassment into Chihiro's mind about what had happened earlier that day.

"Kaorin... I'm sorry," she started, and after Kaori gave a questioning look, she continued, "about earlier... I shouldn't have said those things about you. You were right, I was totally out-of-line. I should have more trust in you. I've known you for so long and yet... it's as if I don't know you at all. I mean, what kind of a best friend am I?"

"A very good one," Kaori interrupted, causing Chihiro to look up in surprise. Taking a deep breath, Kaori answered Chihiro's confused face, "You know, I doubt very many would have tolerated me to the extent that you have. Hmh, don't look so surprised. I know I'm not an easy person to get along with, and I know a large quantity of other people would have cut me out of their lives a good while ago, but... even if I've never asked you, you've never done that. Even after everything I have put you through... there you are still. That if anything shows strength of character, and loyalty. And friendship. And I want you to know that I respect that immensely about you. You have always tried to find ways to get along with me, even if it hurt you. And to have a friend like you still willing to be there for me, it's... more than what I deserve."

"Kaorin, I... that is... it's more than just that. You know, loyalty and oaths and stuff. They're part of it, but the fact of the matter is that... I love you. I really do love you. That's not something I can say of many other people I've met in my life. Of all the friends I've had in my life, both good and not so important, you are the only one that is still an active part in it. And I don't think that'll ever change. I mean, I admit, sometimes you can really drive me up the wall, but... that's not really something I can change, right? It's who you are and I will just have to live with it. Because my bond to you is so strong, that I doubt there is nothing that can ever break it. And if that doesn't equate to some form of love, then I don't know what does," Chihiro finished.

Kaori offered another smile accompanied by a slight hint of amusement, and said, "Yeah, maybe you're right. I guess it has to be some form of love if you've bothered to stick around me for this long. And... I suppose I love you too. After all, you are my best friend. And there must exist some form of love between best friends. Otherwise, what would be the point?"

"Yeah," Chihiro chuckled, bringing about a silence between the two women. Not an uncomfortable one, but one of contented tenderness.

After this had gone on for a while, Kaori suddenly slapped her hands together and said, "You know, Chihiro... I think I just had a great idea. I think I should write... an opera!"

"An... an opera?" Chihiro asked.

"Yes. And I'm thinking of doing... FAUST! You know, the guy who sold his soul to the devil. I mean, just considering the magnificence of my Requiem, this could be even more wonderful than that. And darker, too! I could really do some serious soul searching with this and really go down to the depths of evil and possession and tragedy and... and... eh? Chihiro, are... are you okay?" Kaori asked as Chihiro had started to shake.

"Kaorin... Kaorin, don't... you... dare! Do you know what you have just put me through the past four months? Utter hell! And now you want to drag me right back into it! No freaking WAY!!! That's it. You are not writing an opera on devils and selling of souls, and that's it! I'm putting my foot down! And I don't want to hear any arguments either, young lady! Or old lady... L-L-Lady," Chihiro fumed.

"Chihiro... what..." Kaori started in utter disbelief.

"No, I said I'm putting my foot down! End of discussion! Or I'm going to leave and never come back! My head can't take much more of those things! Is that understood?" Chihiro said with finality.

"O...okay... Chihiro... Calm down. It was just an idea... No need to get so upset. Jeez, it's not as if we're married or anything."

"Well, unlike you, I do value my sanity, and I would very much like to keep it that way. Against everything I put up with..." Chihiro groaned.

After another silence ensued, it wasn't long before Kaori suddenly burst into a fit of laughter, causing Chihiro to look at her in confusion. But on further thinking, it wasn't as if anything really surprised Chihiro anymore when it regarded Kaori, so the polarizing mood swings were nothing unusual.

After the laughter began to subside, Kaori threw her head back and faced the sky, that was now clear and the stars were shining with the brightness of untold galaxies. Keeping her eyes fixed to the sky, Kaori wondered, "Wow... It's so clear and bright..." Kaori's eyes widened as if something was pulling her gaze farther and farther into the blackness of that brightly illuminated stretch of expansiveness. It was as if the calling of the unknown was once more starting to beckon her, of taunting her with the great secrets of the universe just waiting to be revealed and explored out there. If only she could combine this feel she was just experiencing in her music... to find the answer to the Mysterion, the unanswered question... then she would indeed be an artist of untold significance... The wheels of immortality were starting to turn again in her head...

"Kaorin?" Chihiro asked with concern.

"Chihiro... I think I'm going to do some stargazing. Want to join me?" Kaorin asked, her gaze still in the stars above.

Chihiro stood with confusion at first, but then allowed herself a smile, saying, "Sure. I'd love to," after which Kaori went off back inside the house to fetch her telescope and leaving Chihiro waiting outside.

"Kaorin... I shall never understand you. But I suppose I'm destined to always be caught just off the limelight of genius. Guess it's not that bad a place to be. And at the end of the day, I suppose God's in His heaven, all's right with the world. And I'll always end up playing the part of sanity to your insanity."


There! It's done! Bobs a bottle of champagne. Well, this has most certainly been my most ambitious and long story I've ever attempted to write and I've enjoyed every moment of it. It's kind of sad to see it end, but I'm also happy that my little fragment of a dream all those months ago was enough to pull the whole thing through. It's been a blast and I truly hope anybody reading this has enjoyed it as well.

So thanks to all for your support, to those who have read, favourited, or put on alerts, and especially for the following individuals who have vocally contributed in pushing me to the end: Weener1, Fade to Osaka, Einootspork, Brandon Payne, Anime Rebirth, Flower Of Paper & TheoneandonlyKaorin, and for any ideas that you may have inadvertently contributed to my mind.

Also, sorry if anybody was expecting some kind of a huge "I love you" confessional, but that would have been so utterly cheesy, which is something I try to avoid like the plague (sometimes with less success). But, I will leave the door open for conjecture and people are free to read this outcome in any way they please (Kaori and Chihiro can still find romantic love with each other if you want to read it that way). Anyways, me (Jani), Kaori, Chihiro, and Mikuru would like to extend our final thanks to all you who have enjoyed the story. Take care and Bye! :)

© Kiyohiko Azuma, 1999-2002, 2009
© Jani Bodmann (Berlioz II), 2.1.2008
26.4.2008 (Revision complete 22.9.2009)