When John opened his eyes he was disorientated and unsure of where he was, but then he recognized his bedroom and turned over to see Monica sleeping beside him. He sighed and let his head drop heavily into the pillow. What had he done? And not for the first time, come to think of it – they'd had more than a second and a third time too. He felt his skin heat up and his face blush as he recalled last night. Trying to get Monica to back off but letting himself get angry at her when she didn't, and letting that anger turn into passion as they'd clawed at each others clothes before finding the bedroom.
Had he just made the biggest mistake of his life? God he hoped not. He had wanted to talk to Monica and fix things with her – he hadn't thought in a million years that fixing things with her meant sleeping with her again. He never thought he'd be that lucky. He looked at her again, sleeping so peacefully. It was almost seven thirty, should he wake her to get ready for work? He couldn't just leave, not like he had done last time. He decided that coffee may be the best way to go – so he slipped from under the sheets and found some underwear on the floor that he casually put on and made his way downstairs.
When Monica opened her eyes, she knew exactly where she was and smiled to herself. It had been one hell of a night. She sighed happily and turned expecting John to be beside her, but he wasn't there. She sat upright and glanced around the room – had he left? Again? She cursed under her breath. She shouldn't have pushed him so far, she didn't intend for them to sleep together again, it had just happened – she couldn't help but feel it was what they hat both wanted, but if he'd ran away again, she'd really blown it this time. It was all over, their friendship, their professional relationship, all done with.
She lay back down and put her hand to her forehead. She could feel a headache coming already as she tried to assess what was going on and where she went from here. As she lay there staring into the ceiling, she didn't notice John walk back into the room until he sat on the edge of the bed and handed her coffee. She sat up and took it gratefully – grateful he was there and grateful that she had her hands on some caffeine. When John didn't say anything, she wondered if she'd just dreamt last night – but her naked body underneath the sheets and John's underwear suggested that it had all been very real.
"I thought you'd left."
"Again?" she nodded her head. "I wasn't about to go through all that again. No matter how I feel about last night, I wasn't running away," he sipped his coffee and looked as Monica turned to the window. The sun was shining through and cast light across her, she was beautiful. How had he never noticed that before? He knew she was pretty and an attractive woman – but she looked different now somehow – stunning. "You know, when I woke up – I didn't know where I was, I felt disorientated."
"I knew exactly where I was," she looked at him and he blushed. Had he been staring at her? She smiled a little and drank more of her coffee. She looked at the clock and realized they'd have to move soon to get ready for work. She could use a shower and a change of clothes, if she left now she'd just make it home and to work in time. "We should probably get ready for work, I should go home."
"You can shower here – I mean, if that's what you were going home for, it's up to you," Monica nodded her head slightly and agreed to take a shower at John's. He got up and fetched a clean towel and then went downstairs to give her some privacy. Monica didn't quite understand what was going on here, but at least they weren't arguing.
When Monica came down the stairs John excused himself to shower and she watched him go, bewildered as to whether they were going to talk about last night. She waited for him to come back and watched as he pottered around getting ready to leave. She thought she was going to explode the way she started to boil inside, she had to talk to him about last night, how could they go to work and not discuss it?
"John, we need to talk," he looked at her and seemed almost surprised she had said anything, "we can't leave it like this."
"I know."
"So."
"What?"
"John…"
"I know, I know – I just, I don't quite know what you want me to say."
"I want you to tell me what the hell's going on. I think I made it quite clear how I feel, and the only thing you've said to me that makes sense is you want us to be friends. I want that too – but only if…"
"If what?" he walked over to her and her face dropped to the floor. He lifted her chin up and she had tears in her eyes. "If what Monica?" she couldn't say anything – she was hypnotized by his big blue eyes and then those eyes moved closer to her and she was scared to blink in case they moved away. But as John's lips brushed her own she closed her eyes and wound her arms around his neck.
"John…"
"It's ok. I finally got this whole thing figured out."
"You do?"
"Yeah. I'm in love with you."
