Sasuke: Hello, and welcome to 100 ways! I'm your host, Sasuke-Kun!

Icy Bassoon: No you're not.

Sasuke: Anyways, I hope y'all had a good rest, 'cause we're going to torture some more people!! Isn't that great?

Icy Bassoon: No. Get off stage.

Sasuke: Our next victim is…(reads from card)… KANKURO!! Come on out. Kankuro, and give yourself a pat on the back for taking part in our torture show!

Kankuro: It wasn't my decision. Get it over with.

Sasuke: Let's hit the readers with 1 through 10!

Icy Bassoon: FOR THE LAST TIME, SASUKE, GET OFF STAGE!

Sasuke: Ready? Let 's go!

KANKURO: 1 to 10.

---- Tell him that wearing black in the desert isn't a very good idea.

---- 'Why is your outfit kitten-shaped? Any reason?'

---- 'You need to take charge, Kankuro. Show Gaara who's boss.'

---- Tell him he has middle child syndrome.

---- Hide Cro.

---- Tell him it was Temari.

---- When he can't find Cro after that, say that Temari destroyed it.

---- After all of this, tell him it was you and run like heck.

---- When he's on a date, have Gaara walk in right before he kisses his girlfriend.

Sasuke: (If he HAS a girlfriend)

Kankuro: HEY!

---- After that, Have Gaara hug him and then kill his girlfriend.

Sasuke: See you next chapter, folks! Review this fan fiction!

Icy Bassoon: SASUKE, GET OFF THE STAGE!!

Kankuro: Can I go now?

Icy Bassoon and Sasuke: NO.