"You killed it, Ray! Great show."
"Thanks, Buck. It's nice to be home. I love playing the Ryman."
Rayna was pumped. The tour had gone extraordinarily well. The album was showing strong. She had one more show and then had a long break and time with the girls to look forward to. She was excited to start polishing some of the material she wrote on the road and get some of these new ideas swirling in her head down on paper. She had a lot to write about. Being this close to Deacon for this long raised a lot of old feelings that she'd been holding in.
Right now, though, she was exhausted. As was the case most nights, it was always a letdown to come off stage, to be separated from Deacon.
Bucky interrupted her revelry. "Hey, just a heads up, you have visitors."
She was excited. She thought maybe Teddy and the girls were waiting for her, but when she opened her dressing room door she saw Lamar and Tandy patiently waiting for her. She wished she could say this was a pleasant surprise, but it was anything, but.
"Daddy, what are you doing here? I didn't think you worshipped at this particular church." She eyed her sister suspiciously and bent down to give her father a peck on the cheek. Then she coldly embraced her sister, her Daddy's handmaiden.
"So, really, Daddy, I know you don't go for 'that hillbilly music' so what brings you here?"
"Nice to see you, too, Rayna. And you're right; this isn't exactly my kind of music. But I am a business man and I had some associates from out of town that wanted to see the reigning 'queen of country'." That last part said dripping with sarcasm.
Rayna looked at her sister, silently pleading for help.
"What can I do for you, Daddy?"
"It's not what you can do for me. It's what you can do for your husband."
Rayna looked at her father, confused.
"People are talking, Rayna."
Rayna still didn't know where this was going.
Lamar continued, "People are talking about you and your guitar player." He let that bomb drop and waited for her reaction.
"I'm sorry?" She couldn't believe her ears. Where was this coming from?
"From what I saw out there, looks like people are right."
Truth be told, Rayna knew what he was talking about, but she wasn't about to let it show. When she and Deacon were on stage, you could cut the sex with a knife. They teased each other, rubbing up and down each other, gyrating seductively, gazing into each other's eyes, hugging just a minute or two too long. There was a time when that interplay would have been a prelude to sex, but it was innocent, if not titillating, now. If she was honest with herself, she wanted it to be more, but knew that he was forbidden fruit.
"Get out. You have no right. We're friends. We've always been friends," Rayna screamed with as much indignation as she could muster.
"Hold on now little lady. You two were more than friends and you and I both know it. And, you have a special familial bond. Now you wouldn't want that truth to be told, would you?" Lamar threatened.
"Okay, Daddy. Let it be. You said your piece," Tandy offered, trying to be the peacekeeper.
"She needs to hear it. She needs to come to her senses and get rid of him before her husband sees this wanton display. She needs to stop fuelin' the rumor mill. She's making a fool of herself!"
"Okay, I've heard enough. Get out. Both of you." With that Rayna ushered them out and slammed the door behind them. She stormed over to her dressing table and grabbed a perfume bottle and hurled it at the wall then collapsed into a ball on the floor and wept as the bottle and its contents exploded against the wall.
Lamar and Tandy paused a minute when they heard the glass shatter. Tandy wanted to go to her, but she dare not. As luck would have it, when they turned back around, they ran into Deacon.
"Speak of the devil," Lamar prodded.
"Nice to see you, too, Lamar," Deacon responded not taking the bait. There was no love lost between him and Lamar. Lamar felt Deacon was responsible for Rayna leaving home and taking up music. He felt she could do better than Deacon. He was probably right there, but he should have known his daughter better. That was one girl that had a mind of her own and when she set her mind to do something – watch out world.
"You can't leave her alone, can you? She's happily married, Deacon. Move on."
"Why don't you leave her be, Lamar?"
"Okay, Daddy, that's enough. Let's go before Rayna blows a gasket," Tandy said trying to rein him in.
Just then Rayna stepped out. Her eyes darted between Deacon, Lamar and Tandy and what she saw didn't look good. "What's going on, here?" She demanded.
"Nothing Rayna. Daddy and I were just leaving," Tandy said, trying to keep this from escalating further.
After they were out of earshot, Deacon looked at Rayna with pained eyes. She reeked of perfume and had red swollen eyes. "Everything okay?"
"Yeah, everything's okay. How are you?" She said tersely not wanting to explain herself.
"I'm doing just fine," he said unconvincingly.
"See you tomorrow, Ray."
"Yeah, see you tomorrow."
Just walk Deacon, he told himself, but he couldn't bear to see her hurting. "You're not okay, Ray. Talk to me."
"I can't. I can't do this with you anymore."
He grabbed her hand and led her back to her dressing room so they could talk in private.
"What can't you do with me anymore?" He wanted her to say it…needed her to say it.
"I can't keep pretending that I don't love you. I love, Teddy, I do and he loves me. That should be enough. But I'm not whole without you." There it was out there. She didn't mean for it to be, but it was.
He took little pleasure in her revelation, because there was nothing they would do about it. They never stopped loving each other, but they had agreed when he came back into her life that they would remain friends – at arm's length. They toed the line – getting as close as they could without stepping over. He knew if he was the one to step over, he'd scare her away and would be banished from her life. He let her do what she needed. And although it killed him, he played his role.
Performances were the hardest. They danced on the edge of ecstasy. She looked so damned sexy in the 5" heels and tight, short dresses with the plunging necklines that hugged her curves just right and pushed her breasts up and out. She flaunted her sex in front of him during a performance like a bitch in heat. And when she did, he couldn't help but let his mind turn to lascivious thoughts. Thoughts of making love to her, tasting her most private places, her mouth giving him indescribable pleasure.
"Then stop pretending, Ray."
"I love my husband and I'm not going to be a cheater. I love you, but I can't do this."
"I'll be here when you change your mind. Goodnight, Ray."
