Chapter Eleven

Reid waits for Jackie outside the cafe where he asked for her to meet him and he smiles when he sees Jackie scrambling over with her arms full of papers and books. She looks like she did when they were in college together, making his heart skip a beat. Reid catches a few books that fall from her arms and helps her stand up.

"Thanks and I am sorry that I am late," Jackie says with a sigh and a sweet smile.

"It is alright," Reid says with a wide smile. He motions for Jackie to go inside first and they find a table by the windows. Jackie quickly puts her papers in the messenger bag that was beginning to slide down her arm and then turns to Reid with a deep breath.

"So, what is it you wanted to meet up and talk about? I hope it has nothing to do with my kidnappers," Jackie says.

"No, I wanted to talk about us," Reid says softly. "I know that we have been through so much in so little of time, but I am wanting to know if this is going to end."

"Well I mean, not an end," Jackie says. "We will talk about Michael and you can see him when you want to. I am not going to keep you from him anymore now that you have bonded so well."

"That is not what I mean, Jackie," Reid says quickly. He is fumbling for words, of which is not normal, but this situation is not something he is used to and it is beginning to make him frustrated.

"Spencer, what is it?" Jackie asks kindly.

"I have been thinking about us and how nice it was to be together when we were trying to get Michael back. I missed that and I want that to be an everyday thing between us," Reid says. "Jackie, I want us to be together again. Like when we were in college."

"Spencer, we are not in college and you left me while we were in college. I am not sure I want that again because it hurt when you left the first time," Jackie says softly.

"I won't leave again," Reid says quickly. He scoots forward in his chair and takes a deep breathe before looking Jackie in the eye. "Jackie, I want us to start over and start dating again. I will not leave you or hurt you like I did when we were in college because I want you and Michael in my life. I want us to be a family like we were suppose to be a long time ago."

"Spencer, I appreciate what it is you are saying and I am glad you are wanting to do this," Jackie says with a wide smile. She reaches across the table to take his hand in her hand. "I am sorry to say this, but I am not ready for this. Honestly, I am not sure this is something I want because of how much you hurt me. You never came for me or fought to have me back even after all the times I sent photos and updates of Michael the first few years. I would love for us to be together, but my heart is scared that you will end up leaving me and hurting me along with Michael. He needs you now that you are in his life and I am not going to take that from him. I am sorry, Spencer, but I can't date you."

"Jackie," Reid says with sadness.

"I have to go so I can get to grading the essays," Jackie says while gathering her things. "You are a great guy and I hope you find someone that loves you for you. Michael is much happier now that you are in his life again."

"Please, Jackie," Reid pleas, as she walks out of the cafe. Jackie walks out without turning back and it breaks Reid's heart to see her walk out.


Jackie sits at her desk at home, staring blankly at the essay in front of her, but her mind is not on the essay. Her mind is on the conversation she had with Reid four days ago. She could see the pain in his eyes and the longing to be together again, but she was too scared to let herself be with him. When he left her, she was torn and broken until Michael was born. The front door opens softly and Michael calls out to her. Jackie shakes her head to bring her back to the present before walking to greet Michael.

"Hey baby, how was school?" Jackie asks.

"It was alright, but I saw dad this afternoon," Michael says.

"Oh, I did not know that you were seeing him after school today," Jackie says softly.

"Yeah, he sent me a text for me to meet him after school so he and I can talk. He was acting a little weird and he looked sad. What did you do to him, mom?" Michael says, as he puts his backpack on the dining table.

"I did not do anything to him, Michael," Jackie says sharply. She squints her eyes at the boy before her and tries to find out where he got this new attitude.

"Mom, he was fine a few days ago and now he is brooding about something. When did you last see him?" Michael says with his arms crossed over his chest with a brow raised.

"What is up with you and where did you get this attitude or sudden urge to be mean?" Jackie asks with her hands on her hips. There is a knock on the door and the two of them look at it in confusion. Jackie walks over to the door to open it and find Reid there with his hair in a mess.

"Jackie, can we talk please?" Reid asks.

"Yeah, sure," Jackie says. She steps to the side and motions for Reid to go into her office. "You and I are not done, Michael."

"Yes, mom," Michael says with a smile. Jackie closes the door to her office and turns to look at Reid.

"Spencer, what are you doing here? You just saw Michael," Jackie says.

"I want us to be together again because I love you and I miss having you in my life. I will do whatever it takes to make you trust in me again," Reid says quickly.

"What? Spencer, we talked about this," Jackie says with a sigh. She runs her hands through her hair and she takes a deep breathe. "You cannot just come back into my life like this just because of everything that happened recently. I told you that you have all this time to come for me and Michael, yet you never did. Why now?"

"Your dad," Reid says. "He told me after Michael was born that I am not worthy and that I made the right choice to leave you. Also, I was afraid that you were angry with me."

"I was angry with you! I was pissed at you for leaving!" Jackie shouts. Tears form in her eyes as she thinks about the pain of watching him leave and the thought of her having to raise a baby on her own. "I was alone and I needed you from the moment you left me! You were my whole world and I was ready to drop everything to let us become a family like we should have been."

"Jackie, give me a chance please," Reid begs.

"No, you do not get to have a second chance. I am not going to let you do what you did all over again," Jackie cries and shakes her head. Reid walks closer to her when she begins to cry harder and moves away from him. "Stop, Spencer, please don't do this to me."

"Then tell me why you were in the mental hospital when Michael was little," Reid asks softly. He caresses the side of her face and she looks up at him with her hands covering mouth.