Okay-poodles, My hoop jumping is over with, I figured out how to work the new ! –Dances- Yeah boi!

Disclaimer: Okay, do I really need a disclaimer for every chapter? I'll check with the administration. Anyhooddles, Victor Hugo made Les Misérables, and since I'm not him, I don't make any money, so I'm broke, but writing none-the-less.

NOW let's see how well Enjolras is fairing.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Are you all done, now?" Enjolras asked irritated.

The Sues sniffled pathetically and stood one-by-one and delicately blew their noses. (The noises sounded like a flock of geese flying overhead)

Sarah Estelle Prouvaire nodded and blushed bright red.

"Good," Enjolras said, looking dismally at his soaking pant legs.

Naomi-Alicia stood last, wiping her eyes with her sleeve, "Well now," She sniffled, "Now, who has a traumatic childhood story they'd like to tell?"

"What--!" Enjolras shook his head vigorously, he would have tried to tip the chair, but he was too tired and bruised to do that anymore, " Oh no! Absolutely not! I'm sitting through that!"

Eponine Thénardier's large, mocha-chocolate-latte colored eyes narrowed, "Oh, so now I'm not good enough for you!?"

"Would an 'I'm not interested in you in any way, shape or form' suffice as your answer?" He asked.

Eponine pouted and decided to use direct quotes, "You don't seem glad to see me?"

"I've been dreading this! And do you honestly think that'd I'd be tied down if I wanted to see you?"

Eponine sighed, "I thought we made a real break through,"

"Yeah, Enjolras, I thought you had a tender, kind hearted young man, like a young President Lincoln!" Adeline-Bethany-Celeste commented, for the first time not laughing.

Enjolras gave her a blank look that said both, 'Huh?' and 'Who?'.

"Oh, that's right! I'm from the future!" Adeline-Bethany-Celeste said, bursting into laughter, "Lincoln is the pride of America!" She paused, "Oh. Yes! I'm American too; did I forget to say so? But I don't hate Lincoln, even though I'm from Virginia and my uncle is General Robert E. Lee, and I have to over come that and re-earn his love again!"

He shrugged, "Alright then,"

"Ha!" Eponine Thénardier scoffed, "I have criminal parents and a boyfriend who may or may not beat me as I writhe pathetically in a corner as he does so and kills any man who comes close to me! But I still love him even though I love Enjolras!"

Enjolras paled slightly at the 'Kills any man,' part. He wasn't about to die before a big break through in the revolution!

"Pfft, that's bad?" Alicia-Naomi asked, crossing her arms, "I'm a prostitute, I have T.B and I'm pretty much a poorly written Fantine! Except instead of Jean Valjean, Enjolras takes care of me and we fall in love!"

Enjolras stared at her, starting to get a little uneasy, "Who . . . ?"

"Yea, yea, buncha babys," Lila De Fontoir snorted, even though she had fainted in the previous chapter.

"Shut up!" Patria yelled at her, "France is in such crappy conditions, and whomdo you think gets blamed for that? Enjolras is the only one who believes in me!" She stamped her foot childishly.

"Sure. . ." He said, uncertainly.

"I have nothing to complain about," Elise Salandra Debonair said, examining her nails.

Alexandria Combeferre took off her glasses and cleaned them in a scholarly manner, "When my big brother left home, our mother went out of her mind, our Father conveniently died and I became the family servant, much like young Cosette, but I managed to be great, beautiful, and have no suppressed memories!" She replaced her glasses and promptly adjusted them.

Enjolras nodded dumbly, not sure of what he should make of the exchanges going on.

Angela-Louise Grantaire's eyes began to water, "I died of some foreign illness that has yet to be explained, big brother went into such a depression over it, he began drinking and--stuff,"

"Uh—how . . . tragic?" Enjolras said, hesitantly.

Sarah Estelle Prouvaire sniffled tearfully, "Very tragic," Then she blushed. Bright. Freaking. Red.

"Enjolras! And Mademoiselles! " His father called as he came walking towards them, "How are the dates going, son?"

"Torturous. Can I go now?" Enjolras prompted.

"Do you want to marry any of these fine young ladies?" His Father asked.

"Do I want to marry any of these dead-behind-the-eyes women? No. Not any more then I did before," Enjolras said bitterly, before adding in a brightly sarcastic way, "But thank you so much for asking! I really appreciate it!"

"Don't be a smart alek! And no you can't go," His father snapped.

"I'm going to be a smart alek because I'm stuck here! And don't be stupid!" Enjolras snapped back mockingly.

"I just came here to let you know that there is a young man up at the house. He's a little, uh," He looked horribly uncomfortable.

"Hel-lo! Enjolrash!" A male voice called from across the yard.

Enjolras' eyes widened, "Oh dear God, no . . ."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Well, I avoided typing like the plague, I'm uninspired and all my updates on Javert's Retirement kinda covers the tardiness on everything else . . . I hope.

And a cookie for anyone who can guess who this estranged visitor is, here's a hint; Gary Sue. –laughs wickedly at the thought-

Technically, I wrote an EnjyXOC . . . But it's exactly the way I thought it would be, filled with cruel mockery and disdain. –nods approvingly-

THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN! In my poll, half of the people voted serious and the other half voted funny, I need a tiebreaker. Please vote.

Anyhoodles, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. 8D