Chapter Eight
You guys wanted angst, imma show you angst ;)
So I'm gonna give you guys a warning here, there is some sexual content (nothing like a lemon at all) but it's also a little sensitive because...well, you'll see. I'm hoping you catch my drift about what's going to happen.
It's not a good thing either, and I hated writing it as much as you hate reading it, so I'm sorry in advance :)
( • ~ • )
I laid in bed, staring at the ceiling with my alarm clock blaring beside me.
With a heavy hand, I turned the noise off and continued to stare above me, blinking every few seconds. It's been hard getting out of bed the past week. I thought it was just the stress from my dad still being in the hospital, and it might be, but I don't really feel sad about the situation. I'm just sitting back, waiting for something to happen, and I know it's not going to be a good thing. It also doesn't help that Natsu's been playing the field again.
Last Monday when I went back to school, I was so emotionally drained that I told Natsu that I couldn't be in a relationship right now. Of course, I didn't tell him why when he asked, so I just said sorry and walked away with tears threatening to spill. I'm so physically and mentally drained that I just want to sleep. I'm just tired. Tired of everyone leaving me. Tired of people in general.
Thankfully today was Friday, and I have more time to spend with my dad, but he strictly made it so I wouldn't visit him today. He told me to take a break, stay home, and relax.
I might take him up on his offer.
Maybe I should skip school.
Turning around to face the wall, I fell back to sleep instantly.
I woke up a few hours later, still exhausted. I barely managed to get up and answer the phone that was incessantly ringing.
"Hello?" I said groggily.
"Lucy! Where the hell are you?" It was Levy, of course.
"I wasn't feeling well, so I stayed home, like any normal person would." I rolled my eyes.
"Well I was calling to tell you about this party tonight, the ideal place to start step three." Right, HP with Natsu. It seemed so nonexistent now that we haven't been talking.
"I'm not up for it, so I'm gonna go back to sleep."
"You're going to this damn party if I have to drag you by your hair. This is the perfect time to make Natsu jealous."
"The HP is fucking stupid, I have more important things to do than worry about some guy who Lisanna willingly slept with because of a petty fucking crush." I regretted the words immediately after I said them. I didn't mean to snap at her, but pestering me to go to a party made me want to punch a wall.
The line went silent, and I bit my lip. "I'll uh, I'll go to the party." I hung up the phone and slammed it on the table. Slowly sinking to the floor, I slumped against the wall and pulled my knees to my chest. I rested my forehead on my thighs and choked back a sob.
( • ~ • )
I stared at the girl in the mirror with tired eyes. I didn't even recognize her. Dark bags under her eyes that contrasted to her sickly pale skin. Blonde hair that was messy and lifeless. Her face skinnier than usual from not eating as much as she should.
Thank Mavis for makeup.
After assessing myself in the mirror, I took a shower and managed to gain some of the bounciness to my hair by washing it. Looking back into the mirror, I took out my makeup kit and started what would probably take an hour to do. First things first, I grabbed the concealer that matched my skin tone and brushed it over the visible, but faint scars on my wrist. It was painful to even look at them, but I got used to it after covering them up everyday. My dad doesn't even know this about me. It's not exactly something I would want to share to the world.
I was in a dark place after my mom died around seven years ago, and that's somewhere I don't want to be ever again.
After making myself look halfway decent with makeup and my sort of okay-looking hair I walked back into my room and got dressed. I looked into my full-length mirror as I put on my black wedged boots to match my long sleeve black skater dress. I didn't want to dress too fancy and plus it was kind of chilly out so I wanted to at least be kind of warm. When I was done I grabbed my keys and drove to the party fashionably late, which was a nice convenience.
I walked into the house and the smell of alcohol and sweat wafted into my nose, along with the sound of cheering and ridiculously loud music that reverberated through my ears, every beat pulsing almost painfully. I managed to squeeze through all the dancing and gyrating bodies and make it to the kitchen, where I'll drink all of my stress and sorrow away.
I just wanted to forget. For one night.
I headed straight for the vodka and mixed it with some soda that I found unopened in the fridge to lessen the bitter taste. Taking a big gulp of the concoction, I headed out to find Lisanna and Levy
It proved to be a challenging feat, between the huge crowds of people that made me nervous and the guys walking around drunkenly looking for a quick lay. There were couples literally ripping each other's clothes off on a few couches and I had to look away before I entered uncharted territory. But one pair really caught my eye, and let's just say I was everything but happy at the situation.
An all too familiar pinkette was leaning against the red painted walls, whispering in some girls ear who was beyond drunk. She kept giggling at everything Natsu said and he kissed her a few times on the neck. I narrowed my eyes at the two and the grip on my red solo cup tightened.
Natsu eventually caught my eye in his peripheral vision and smirked slightly, immediately crashing his mouth onto the redhead's, who responded eagerly, and slipping his hands under her short skirt. Downing my drink in one go, I knew exactly who to go to.
I searched the area until my eyes landed on Sting's blonde and distinct hair and headed straight toward him. He seemed surprised that I was approaching him but smirked as he crossed his arms.
"Can't get enough of me, huh?" He asked.
"Shut up, jackass," I said while placing my palms on his cheeks and moving his head to me so his lips met mine. His hands gripped my hips and my back was met with the wall as he reached up and cupped my thighs, lifting me up. I crossed my legs around his waist and parted my mouth a little more, allowing his tongue to sneak in. I was already regretting doing this, and the thought of stopping and going home nagged me at the back of mind, but I ignored it and feigned a moan when Sting started palming my breast through my dress. The make out session soon turned uncomfortable to me, especially when he started carrying me up the stairs to search for an empty bedroom. On our way up, I caught the icy glare of Natsu and averted my eyes, hating myself for what I was doing.
I yelped when he threw me on the bed roughly after closing the bedroom door behind us and started kissing me again. My hands were itching to push him off, but I didn't. Which was my biggest mistake tonight, besides drinking alcohol while I'm back on my anxiety medication.
He took his shirt off and slid his hands up my legs under my dress, and I knew I wanted to stop.
He started kissing my neck again, but I pulled away. "Sting," I started.
"Shh," he whispered, hiking my dress to my waist exposing my underwear.
"We should stop." I said urgently, pulling my dress back down. He grabbed my wrists with one hand and held them above my head, moving my clothes back to where he wanted them. "Stop." I said more firmly, making him pause.
"I've waited too long to do this again, and one word isn't going to make me wait longer." He continued with his assault, taking my clothes off while I struggled under his grip and body weight. I started to scream for help but he gagged me with his shirt, my wrists still trapped in his hands. Tears started leaking from my eyes and I completely shut down, whimpering with every kiss and every move he made. He squeezed my hips, which would definitely bruise, as he did what he wanted to me.
It was one of the worst nights of my life, no one coming to my rescue.
( • ~ • )
This was actually a little longer than normal, hope you appreciate that :)
So I'm going to be blunt here and say that rape happens everywhere and all the time in the real world. I was hesitant to go down this route because of how sensitive the topic is but I let it go for you guys.
Just don't leave a bunch of hate about how "unrealistic" it might be or how Lucy would never stop fighting. I know she wouldn't, but this is a fanfiction, not the anime, and her character doesn't have to be a carbon copy. She's still Lucy, just a little more "low-spirited" because of the weight and stress of everything.
So if you want to, leave a review and tell me your thoughts on the direction of this story :)
See you later, My Poptarts~
