Prepare yourselves…


"There's something I have to tell you."

Caroline's heart began to pound in her chest. A hurtling wave of sickening emotions was overwhelming her voice, almost sending her into tears before she had even begun. But Caroline forced herself to stand taller, to fake a smile and hold her head high with the little shred of confidence she had left.

Then she looked at Klaus and her wall began to crack. She'd rehearsed every line and the specific tone of her voice but all that faded away in an instant the moment his eyes widened.

How can I tell him when he looks at me like that? Caroline thought.

She was barely able to stand by now. Her legs almost fell out from underneath her so Caroline held on to the railing to her right. She desperately tried to swallow down her fear. You can do this, Caroline. You have to, you promised. A few passers-by paused to throw curious looks at the pair. Not wanting to be under the watchful eyes of strangers, Caroline quickly turned around and Klaus followed her into the nearest alleyway a few feet away. She looked around for a moment. The area was dusted with a few dustbins and loose strands of cardboard and random sheets of old newspapers. It was summer weather but the wind was growing fiercer by the minute and when Caroline shivered, Klaus immediately began to quickly shrug his jacket off.

She held up a shaking hand. "Please…don't." Surprisingly, Caroline's voice didn't crack this time so she fumbled on, still unable to meet her boyfriend's intense stare. "I have to tell you something, and I need you to listen." She began, desperately trying to think of it as something else, something completely ordinary and not life threatening. Because if she made it about herself, Caroline knew she was going to make it through the conversation that was coming up. There Klaus stood in front of her, and all Caroline could think about was how Klaus might never look at her the same after what she was about to say. Though she knew, somewhere deep in her saddened heart, that it was inevitable. And she'd rather Klaus hear it from her directly.

"I'm ill."

Klaus blinked. "Why didn't you say so? I wouldn't have minded taking you back to the hotel."

"That's not what I meant."

Caroline shook her head, her hair falling like dead weight across her shoulders. Well, I'm sure that clarified everything; she scolded herself when Klaus looked even more confused. Wouldn't it be nice if that was the end of their conversation though? If she simply smiled and nodded and claimed to be feeling a migraine coming along. Klaus would surely looked relieved and hold her hand and most likely even stay with her in the hotel room. She imagined him stroking her hair or whispering sweet nothing in her ears and almost cried out. The thought was so unbelievable.

She remembered a conversation with her father from a few months back.

"Is there anything going on between you and the Mikaelsen boy?" Bill had asked his daughter with every inch of fear and protectiveness given to a doting father.

It had been the same night of the play and Caroline hadn't managed to hide her smile at the thought of Klaus' lips on hers an hour ago. Bill noticed and his hands tightened on the steering wheel of his old jeep. When they came to a stop at the next set of lights, he turned to his giddy daughter with the sad eyes of a man about to crush his daughter's hopes. But he knew it had to be said. "You shouldn't lead him on, Caroline. It will not end well for either of you, you know that. Stay away from him, Caroline. I ask this of you, only this, because I love you. I cannot bear to see you give your heart away only for it to be broken. Do not let this go too far, my child, I beg of you." It pained him to say this, but even as his daughter's smile faded, he knew he had to be hard on Caroline. He knew in the long run, it would be less painful for her, and even if he came across as selfish and horrible, as long as Caroline shed less tears then Bill would feel just a little bit better about his words.

"I know, dad, but…"

Bill heard his daughter's voice tremble and guilt cooled his heart. "I want what's best for you; please don't ever forget that, sweetheart." He begged quietly, wanting to see her smile again.

She did, though it was barely visible. "I'll never forget it, I promise. But…perhaps it's time I've earned a little heartbreak."

And as Caroline stood in front of Klaus, with the Massechutes wind begging to whip an icy breeze around her ankles and exposed arms, she wanted to dissolve into thin air and just…let go of everything tying her hazy thoughts and memories to this horrible moment that was about to unfold. But if God had graced her with one positive gift, it was strength. The strength that she'd learnt from church and built from faith, the strength to push through the bad parts of life with the belief and hope that there would always be a silver lining just around the corner. Caroline felt as if she were a firework with the wrong expiration date; unable to tell whether she would eventually just…shoot off, or whether she was simply going to stay worked up inside without any resolution or explosion.

She couldn't even look at Klaus.

If she did, Caroline just knew that she wouldn't make it any further. For all the times she had put off this conversation, she was only going to pay for it now…and for all those times she had distracted Klaus with kind words and thoughtful ideas, all this time, she'd been making it harder for the both of them.

How selfish am I?! She wanted to cry into the night. I should've walked away, just like father told me to.

A lifetime's worth of silence stretched out until Klaus took a step forwards, even closer; so close that she could feel his breath catch and see the faint growth of stubble on his chin and jawline. She wanted to touch his skin, trail her hands along every inch of him, for she feared that after this night, he wouldn't look at her the same again.

"Tell me what's going on." When Klaus spoke, she almost cried right there and then. The silence had almost become so normal, that she'd forgotten the sound of his voice. He carried on with gracious words. "I promise I'll listen, I said I'll always listen to you and I meant that, Caroline. Trust me. I just want to know, I need to know, what's been upsetting you lately. Every time we talk about the plans for the future, you pull away. Part of me understands that the future isn't something that everyone loves to fantasise about, but…I would've thought that you'd be eager to start travelling and seeing the world. Just like you always told me you wanted to." Klaus looked at her with such openness that she wanted to run from the alleyway, back to Mystic Falls and hide away forever. "But whenever I bring it up, you flinch or pull away and your face…it's always sad." His eyes began to shine with unshed tears and Caroline slowly felt her heart begin to break. "You're so sad all the time, Caroline, and there's nothing I can do about it unless you talk to me-"

"I'm sick, Klaus," She burst out. The voice that spoke those words was barely whisper but bravely, Caroline masked all the fear and all the sadness behind her eyes inside her heart.

It was finally the time for truth.

Klaus deserved it, and the only thing that kept her voice steady was that thought running wildly through her thoughts. "I have leukaemia."

Is that it? What else do I have to say? Should I explain…anything else?

Caroline stared in sheer terror at the frozen man in front of her. Before, Klaus had been tapping his foot anxiously against the paving and racking nervous eyes along her face but after her sudden confession, his body had become unearthly still. The type of stillness that is far from settling, far from peaceful, and far from encouraging. In fact, it was the opposite of peaceful. It was tense and completely shattering for Caroline, who felt every resolve within her crumble into a pathetic pile of weary dust and trembling eyes. "Say something." She begged, knowing for well that his next words were going to break her.

"You…can't have leukaemia."

Thump thump.

"You're…eighteen years old. This doesn't make sense…"

Thump THUMP.

"Why would you say that to me, Caroline? Why would you say it at all?" Klaus began to stream off, desperately stringing words together in blurred speech. "If this is some lame excuse to break up with me, then you really are sick!" His voice cracked; his resolve crumbling just as hers was. She could see it in his eyes; in his slowly fading, hardening eyes. This was knowledge that was going to haunt him just as it had been haunting her for years. Everything in his expression was turning wild; his eyes were widened and terrified as he "I cannot believe you'd do this to me, why are you…"

"I have leukaemia." She repeated robotically. What else could she say? There was no use in explaining what type it was. All that mattered was that it was slowly killing her and no treatment or medicine could heal her. Sure, some could maybe give her a few more months of even another year but in the end, Caroline knew it would become a sense of false hope. So instead, she had accepted it…until Klaus had come along.

"When did you get diagnosed? Why didn't you tell me? I…I don't know…I can't think anymore…" He brought his shaking hands up to his head and when he looked into her eyes, she saw the same fear and sheer terror that Caroline had seen every day in the mirror. "Why is this happening?"

It was strange. As Klaus was breaking down, Caroline became more and more distant; as if she had gone past the breaking point and was simply watching the scene from another person's view. Perhaps she had already died, and was now reliving moments that she'd wished she would've taken. No…this felt too painful and human to be a dream, Caroline acknowledged.

"I was diagnosed a few years ago, right before starting high school actually. It's called chronic leukaemia and can takes years to kill you…me." She corrected with a start. The words seemed to be coming out but Caroline didn't feel as if she were a part of them. She couldn't stop either, reciting in a monotone, as if reciting from doctors and scientists and medical examiners she'd visited. "The official name is Chronic Lymphocytic leukaemia and it's when your white blood cells take over the number of healthy blood cells so your body cannot fight infections well. This can lead to-

"I don't care!" Klaus irrupted. He was breathing heavily, tears streaming down his cheeks as he faced her. "I don't bloody care, Caroline! You think I want to know what's killing the woman I love? Of course I don't! I don't care what's hurting you or making you sick, I just care…that…you're dying. And there's nothing…I can do…to stop it…" He trailed off, voice becoming thick with emotion and Caroline closed the distance between them, cradling his head in her arms as he cried.

"It's okay, Klaus." She soothed uselessly. "It'll be okay."

What on earth was she saying? Despite the emptiness, Caroline was slowly growing angry with herself. Klaus had just found out she was dying and she was telling him it was going to be okay. They should give me a genius award, she thought angrily as Klaus sobbed into her chest. She stroked his hair as her fingers began to trace gentle circle into the nape of his neck. It was then, suddenly, that she realised something.

She was going to die.

It wasn't as if Caroline hadn't considered it before; of course she had. Many doctors and even her father had reminded her, time after time, but only now, after saying it to Klaus had she realised how…angry that made her. Not a simple anger that died like a flame, but a raging, hot-white anger that could fuel an entire army. It coursed inside her veins, bubbling up until her throat seized; hands and legs beginning to tremble. She suddenly realised something else, and it hit her sharply, drawing a painful intake of break.

Caroline leant against the wall again, vision blurring. "I was fine with everything…until you."

Leaning away from her embrace, Klaus let out a small gasp. "Caroline?" His face was a mixture of heartbreak and confusion. "I…"

The anger began to seer into her thoughts, vision clouding with angry, white dots. "I had accepted it!" She cried, hands balling into fists. "I was dealing with it…until you! I thought to myself, God didn't target you on purpose; this is science at its work, not His actions. But then you came along. And all I wanted to do, all I still want to do, is be with you. But I'm going to die. I'm dying, Klaus. I'm dying." She repeated, tongue heavy, tone verging on robotic. "And now I have to leave everything behind. Do I even get an answer?! No! I don't. No one is going to come down and explain what I've done to deserve this so I have to be okay with not knowing." She took a shaky breath, leaning her head against the stone wall, relishing in the cold bite it gave. "I'm definitely not okay with any of this."

Suddenly, the anger seemed again. "I've had this since I was thirteen years old, damn it!" She hissed, ignoring the painful stab of tears rushing down her cheeks, hastily wiping them away with a shaking hand. "I stopped responding to treatment over a year ago. I didn't tell anyone, I told my father not to. I wanted to be normal, Klaus. Can't you understand that?" Caroline begged sadly, ignoring when Klaus tried to reach for her. "I couldn't tell anyone. They'd look at me…as though I was going to curl up and die right there and then. And…that was fine. I was fine…until you."

She'd never felt so consumed by anger. It didn't feel good, either. It felt fiery and raged and painful. Short, stabbing motions pained her chest, and Caroline knelt over with a breathless gasp, hands tight around her stomach, as if trying to hold in the anger swirling inside.

Klaus hurried forwards; about to wrap an arm around her waist, help her upwards again. "Caroline…"

Unable to meet his gaze, Caroline held out a hand, feeling it flat against his chest. "Please, don't." She managed to whisper, tears brimming behind her eyes. And then, she turned, fleeing in the opposite direction, away from Klaus, and back to the hotel.


If Caroline was sick, then Klaus was violently ill.

As soon as she left, Klaus couldn't move. His legs felt dead, useless weights below him, and every inch of his skin was numb; though from shock or cold, he didn't know. The only thing he knew to do was throw punches into the wall until his knuckles were covered with slick, red blood, and a dull ache smothered his bones. He'd felt anger before. He'd felt sadness before. But Klaus had never felt a violent, sickening pain like he did right now, a pain so overwhelming that he could've sworn his pulse was virtually gone.

She can't be sick, she can't be sick….she can't be…she can't….no.

Petty words and excuses rolled across his tongue, but Klaus knew with each one, that they were as far from the truth as humanely possible. Perhaps this was his fault after all. Caroline was a vision of everything good and noble in life; she went to Church, was kind-hearted and loving to everyone, never once uttered a single wrong doing in her entire life, yet somehow had been cursed with this fatal illness. Klaus clutched at the sides of his head, fingers digging into his scalp, eyes squeezed tightly shut.

This is my entire fault; this is my punishment, not hers.

God had cursed Klaus, for all his sins and errors, and cursed Caroline because she was everything to him. Klaus realised this with a start. Everything clicked into place, and all he managed to do was sink to the floor, back still against the wall outside the venue, the distant sound of cheers and loud music echoing the dull thud of his heartbeat.

"Niklaus?"

Jesus Christ, no.

Just when Klaus couldn't think of any ways for things to become worse, a tall man, dressed sharply in a black suit, dark green tie and clean-cut features, narrowed his eyes at him. The other man's smile was vicious, almost victorious, not welcoming. "Elijah told me you were not joining us. Or did you decide to grow up and brave the party?"

Klaus managed to stand, brush off whatever dust he'd collected on his own attire, and meet the man's cold stare. "Good evening, father." His voice showed no sign of distress, no sign of anger, yet no sign of…anything. There was no emotion, and for that, Klaus was most pleased. His nerves were on an edge, and he felt his lips curl into a mimicking smirk, and was even more pleased when Mikael frowned.

"You look well." Klaus commented smoothly, enjoying the comfortable level of equal power simmering in the air.

"As do you, my boy." His father replied, just as calmly. The older man shoved his hands into his pocket, brought out a cigarette and placed it in-between his lips, toying with the edge. Then, as though snapping the tension with a thick band, Mikael raised an eyebrow, his smile growing wicked. "Your mother looks just as lovely as when you tore her away from me."

Klaus grinned, teeth snapping together, and he murmured a silent thank you to his father, glad for the excuse. It was just what he needed, the perfect opportunity granted for a release that had been bubbling up inside ever since Caroline's confession had broken his calm resolve. Klaus shrugged, eyes gleaming, and swinging his left arm forwards, aimed a punch directly at Mikael's nose. The hit was thrilling. As his fist collided with the other man's face, Klaus laughed, the awful crunching sound sending a few shocked gasps around people passing by. Blood poured down Mikael's face and the other man groaned, hands clutching his face. His expression was coated in surprise, and that only made Klaus laugh harder, glad to have one-upped his father for the first time in his life.

"You know what? Fuck. You." Klaus sneered, lip curled, eyes alight with anger. "Go back to your new whore; I'm sure she deserves every bit of you."

And with that, Mikael watched as his son turned around, and walked back to the hotel.


Well…merry Christmas Eve to you all! Gosh, aren't I evil? *giggles*

Eugh, I apologise for not updating…in, well, months!

I actually started college two months ago and have been extremely busy with work and college life as well as getting hooked into another fandom; Once Upon a Time. If anyone's watched it, let me know, if you haven't…go start! It's wonderful, full of fairy tales and romance and wonderful storylines.

I'll have another update for you soon, as I've already planned the whole story, so I promise I shall finish it :)

Merry Christmas to you all! xx