Helping myself

Here she sat, alone in her house, once again. Nobody caring enough about her to check up on her, asking if she was all right, if she needed to talk about it. No one was there, because Elena was once again more important, even if it was her that tired to kill her mother and tried to stake her. She just wasn't important enough for anybody to care about, not even her own mother cared enough to ask if something was wrong.

She, Caroline Forbes, was so utterly alone and unimportant, to everyone around her. Elena was right. No one cared, she was just a shallow little insecure girl, and not the tough vampire she'd made herself be. It would be so easy to just shut it all out. To turn it off. Elena did, and she didn't care about anything. Not what other people thought of her. Not if she finally would be appreciated for all her efforts.

She sat on her couch in her dark and empty house. She was constantly fighting a battle, that wasn't even hers! Why? Because she wanted to be appreciated. Wanted to feel like she wasn't some replaceable part of her friends lives, but she saw the truth now. Elena wanted to kill her, Bonnie didn't even care enough to try and pretend she was important to her, Damon was… well, that should be pretty self-explanatory, Stefan saved her yes, but left right away with Damon and Elena, not even checking if she was okay, her mom didn't even care and Tyler had left after cheating on her with that were-slut, and then there were Matt. Sweet human Matt, that tried so hard to help, but couldn't seem to let go of Elena, not even when they were together… Then there was Klaus. The one who actually put her first, who acted like she mattered had fucked the were-slut. She shuddered, remembering her surprise when she arrived at the Mikaelson mansion to give Klaus his dress back and she heard the sounds. She heard her moans… And she ran. She ran for dear life, not wanting to hear another betray her… Not again, never again…

She looked down at her phone, unlocking it. It had been more than three hours since her almost-death and nobody had bothered with even trying to contact her. She frowned and a small tear made it's way down her cheek. She was always an after thought, never on someone's mind. She would always just be Caroline Forbes, insecure, neurotic control freak, who never experienced love, friendship or care. She would never. She wasn't Elena Gilbert. She wasn't special, she never would be. She helped and gave everything she had in her, to her friends, but when she needed them, where were they? With Elena, because she was special, she was every man's dream and every girl's friend. And what was she? What was Caroline? She looked around her dark living room, hoping to come up with just one good answer, just one, but she couldn't. Her mother hated her because of her turning, something she couldn't control herself. Her friends took advantage of her. She thought Bonnie had come to terms with her being a vampire, but no. She still hated her. Elena was just… She was a bitch right now, and so not her friend. Stefan, one of her apparent close friends, her vampire-teacher, she helped him through everything. Elena leaving him for Damon. Elena shutting off her emotions. His ripper-tendencies. But when she needed him, he was nowhere to be found, because Elena was more important.

She nodded to herself, having made her decision when someone knocked on her door. She looked to her front door, wondering who it would be. Who could be her one friend? The one person coming to her when she needed it the most. She stood up and made her way to the door and opened it, only to be met by a crazed looking Stefan.

"Elena escaped, we need to look for her." He said in frenzy and Caroline stared at him. Couldn't he see she had been crying? Couldn't he see she was sadder than she had ever been before, even after her own father had tortured her and called her a monster? She looked at him, not saying anything, not moving. "Caroline, come on! You need to help us! She is vulnerable right now and needs all her friends help." He said as he saw she didn't move. He looked at her confused. "What are you waiting for? Everyone is out looking, and you're just at home, not helping. She's your best friend, you have to help us!"

She looked him in the eyes. Click. It really was easy. She looked at Stefan's appearance and didn't care. She didn't care about how much he needed her help. How desperate he looked right now. She was completely relaxed. At ease. Nothing bothered her right now. She couldn't care less what happened to Elena. What happened to her friends.

'They weren't your friends anyway, darling.' A voice inside her head said, and she couldn't agree more. They weren't her friends tonight. They weren't her friends when she was kidnapped and tortured by Jules. They certainly weren't her friends when Damon had abused her so badly.

-X-

Stefan frowned and looked her in the eyes. He couldn't understand why she didn't move? Didn't she understand how dangerous it was having Elena out on her own? He looked at her again, really looked at her. Then it happened. Right in front of him. Her eyes went dead. He wasn't looking into Caroline's eyes anymore. They were completely empty, not showing any sign of life. Any sign of emotions. What did she do?

"Caroline?" He asked tentatively and she cocked her head to the side.

"Yes Stefan?" She answered in a cold emotionless voice. Her eyes never leaving his and he shuddered. She shouldn't sound like that, she never did. She was always bright and bubbly. Helpful and sweet. Not like this, not without emotions.

He widened his eyes and shook his head. "What have you done, Caroline?"

She smiled icily. "I've just gotten rid of those pesky emotions I had so many of. This is much better. Everything is so much more clear now."

Stefan looked at her and took a step towards her, but stopped when her icy smile widened. "I wouldn't come closer, Stef," She said sarcastically. "Now is really not the right time to start to care."

He frowned confused. "What?" He asked and looked carefully at her. "Care…"

She hissed. "You don't get to call me that! Only people who love and care about me has the right to do that!"

He took a step forwards and grabbed her arm. "And I do. I do care about you, Caroline. That's why I know this isn't you! That you don't want to do this!"

She pulled her arm from his hand and glared at him, her smile so icy. "That's what you all would like me to believe so you can use me in your schemes and risk my life." She said emotionless and walked out onto the porch, making him turn around to face her. "But tonight has been a real eye-opener. Not one of my so-called friends could care enough to see if I was okay? If I needed someone to talk to? Not even my mother cared enough to check if I was alive. So really, you and every one else, has no right to call me 'Care'."

He opened his mouth, about to say something back. To tell her he cared, he saved her! Of course he cared! She was his best friend! But he remembered he never even asked if she was okay, he just took of right after with Damon and Elena and left her alone. He shut his mouth.

Caroline laughed mirthlessly, no emotion showing in her eyes and nodded. "That's right. Not one of you stayed back. Not one of you called. So how much can you all really care?"

"Elena was…" He started, but Caroline flashed to him, being right in his face with a scowl.

"Always Elena, never Caroline. I've been close to death more times than her, and no one bothered with me. The only thing Elena was… was right. I should have turned it off so long ago. Then maybe I wouldn't have been used by the people who were supposed to be my friends."

"We all care about you, Caroline. You have to stop this! It's not you." He tried again, knowing it was a very thin argument.

She chuckled darkly, before shaking her head. "No. The Caroline you knew is gone. She was weak, pathetic, searching for approval. Not anymore, I'm better now. I don't have to feel sad and alone anymore, because the people around me doesn't love me, isn't that what you want? For me not to hurt?" She asked with a deadly smirk. "Don't you care about me, Stefan?" She asked sarcastically before her arms moved so fast and his world went black.

-X-

Caroline stood on her porch, looking down at the body of Stefan. He laid there and still, nothing. She smirked and shrugged her shoulders and walked into the house again. She had gotten her message through. She was done. Done with helping those people. Done with being used. She wasn't about to stick around in this hick-town.

She flashed to her bedroom and quickly threw some clothes, make-up and other essentials into a bag and flashed to the fridge, taking all the bloodbags and putting them in her cooler. She stood by the kitchen-island, contemplating if she had anything else she would like, before she smirked to herself. Vervain, it was essential. Someday, maybe in a day or two, an original would come looking for her and she wasn't about to get compelled to turn it on, no thanks.

She raided her mother's vervain stash and put it in a plastic bag, not wanting it to contaminate her clothes. She flashed back to her bathroom. She nearly forgot, she couldn't leave anything with her DNA. She took her toothbrush, hairbrush, everything they could do a locater spell with. They might have thought she was stupid, but she wasn't that stupid. She was number one in all her classes for a reason. She knew they could possibly use her mother, but shrugged. Her mother wouldn't care; she wouldn't even let a drop of her blood go to waste, just to find her vampire-daughter.

She flashed outside. She could take her own car, but she would have to change it out, it was to easy to track. She nodded and threw all her bags and cooler on the backseat and got into her car with a smirk. She would just switch cars in Richmond. She started her car and drove away from her childhood home, not even bothering to close the front door or stay until Stefan woke up.

-X-

Stefan groaned, the pain in his neck still not something he was used to, even after having it snapped countless times. He opened his eyes and frowned. He was in his own bedroom, but he was at Caroline's? Then it hit him. She had snapped his neck! She had turned of her humanity.

He got up and walked downstairs, hearing voices coming from the living room. Damon's, Bonnie's and Liz's?

He walked into the room and every one turned to look at him. Bonnie widened her eyes and hurried to him.

"What happened? Are you okay? When you didn't come and help we went to look for you and found you with a snapped neck!" She asked.

He frowned. Didn't they find him at Caroline's? Didn't they look for her? Were they really so bad friends to her as she claimed? "Where did you find me?"

"At Liz's. On the porch, the door open." Damon said with a shrug.

Liz looked at him confused. "Why were you at my house, Stefan? No one was home."

"What about Caroline?" He asked confused. Where was she? What had they done to her?

"Wasn't there." Damon said nonchalantly. "Now why don't you tell us who snapped your neck, so you had to let me and witchy find Elena."

He widened his eyes. "Where's Caroline?!" He asked loudly, flashing to the basement, hoping they'd found her and put her down there, trying to get her humanity back on, but to no luck. She wasn't there. He flashed to the living room again. "Where is she?"

Damon frowned. "Why are you so worried about Blondie?"

"Caroline's probably just with Tyler." Liz said and looked to Damon. "I have to go to the station and report Elena's animal attacks from last night." Damon nodded.

Stefan looked around all the people in the room. "You don't care that Caroline is missing?"

"She's not missing. She's just at Tyler's. Call him." Bonnie said and sat on a couch. "Then ask her when she's coming to help and why she couldn't be bothered to help us finding Elena."

His eyes widened. "You don't know?" He asked, as Liz was about to leave the house.

"Know what, Stefan?" Damon said in a sigh.

"She turned it off."

"We know. She turned it off a while ago, Stefan, try to keep up." Damon said sarcastically.

"Not Elena! Caroline." He said with a frown. "She snapped my neck last night! She turned off her humanity."

Liz gasped and looked with wide eyes at Stefan. "Caroline?" She asked and shook her head. "No. She wouldn't do that, she knows that's not good."

Stefan nodded. "She turned it off right in front of me, Liz. Trust me, she's turned it off."

"Call her!" Bonnie said and stood.

Stefan nodded and took out his phone and called her.

"Hello Stefan." Came her reply and Stefan put the phone on speaker.

"Care, where are you?" He asked concerned.

She laughed mirthlessly. "Not in Mystic Falls, that's for sure. I told you last night I was done with you people."

"Care, tell us where you are." Bonnie said with a frown.

"I don't think I want to, Bonnie." She said in a cold voice. "Why would I tell you people anything?"

Damon scoffed. "We can't be bothered with your tantrums right now, Blondie! Elena is…" He said but Caroline cut him off.

"Actually Damon, I don't really give a shit about what you want or what Elena needs. You of all people, have no right to demand things from me." She said in a hiss. "I wish I had stayed back just a little longer, so I could kill you."

"Caroline!" Liz said in horror.

"Oh, hello Elizabeth. I see you're with Elena too." She said in an uninterested voice.

"Caroline sweetie, tell me where you are." Liz said concerned.

"Hmm… No thanks. I don't think I will let you play the concerned mother right now, when everybody knows you're not. Why don't we just drop the act?"

Liz looked hurt and looked at Bonnie, who looked in sympathy at her.

"Are we done here? Because I have things to do, people to eat." Caroline said with a tiny chuckle.

"You have to come back, Care. We need you." Bonnie said and Caroline chuckled darkly.

"You don't need me, you have never needed me, Bonnie. You have used me, yes, but not needed me other than to sacrifice myself for your precious Elena. I'm not going to let you people use me anymore. I mean, how long did it take you to realize I wasn't even in Mystic Falls anymore?"

The room went quiet and she laughed mirthlessly. "That right there should tell you how much you really need and care about me. You didn't even wonder where I was. But don't worry, as long as you have Elena, you should all be just fine, so I hope you have a good life, considering it will be short because of your best friend."

"You're my best friend!" Bonnie exclaimed, wide eyed at the phone. "Come back and let me help you."

"But I don't need help, Bonnie." She said in a sickly sweet voice. "And we were never really best friends, right? I mean… You hate me, what I am. It's fine that you hate me, I really don't care, but don't say I'm your best friend, because we both know that is so far from the truth as anything can be."

"I don't hate you, Care." Bonnie said in a small voice.

"Oh, you don't? My bad, I must have misunderstood you, when you hated me turning, when you made my daylight-ring… What was it you told me? Right, 'the witch that makes the ring can take its powers back'. Did you say that to Elena? Did you hate her as much as you hated me when I turned? Did you avoid her? No, you didn't, because it's Elena, your best friend and I was just the annoying little girl you had to put up with." Caroline said without emotions. "Now, I have to leave you to think about what I said, and don't try to call me again, I'm getting rid of my phone as soon as I hang up. Can't have you trying to find me, even though I know you wont. Goodbye."

With that she hung up and Stefan looked at the other people in the room.

-X-

Caroline smirked to herself and threw her phone out of the window of her 'borrowed' car. She was finally done with all things related to Mystic Falls and turned up the radio and sung along to the songs. She had a lot of way to go, but she couldn't take a plane, it was too easy to trace and she had already switches cars twice now.

Yes, she was on her way to new places. She would see the world, but for the time being she had to lay low, make sure they wouldn't find her if they decided to search for her. After a while they would give up and she could go to Europe. She grinned at the thought, she had to research where she wanted to go, but she could go anywhere, so what did it really matter? She could just go where she wanted. There were no restrictions on her.

She would have to stop driving soon, but that shouldn't be a problem, she would just compel herself a motel room. She had plans and no one or nothing was about to ruin them.

-X-

Klaus waited in his sitting room. She should have been back with the dress by now, but he hadn't heard anything from her. She should have thanked him for letting the mutt, Tyler Lockwood come back to Mystic Falls to give her, her perfect prom. He scowled, where was she?! Did she just think she could take advantage of his kindness towards her?

He growled and stood up, deciding to seek her out and get his thank you, from her. He drove to her house and knocked, waiting for someone to answer the door, but no one ever came. He opened it himself and walked in, the house silent. It almost looked abandoned. He flashed to her room, finding her bed neatly made, her schoolbooks stabled on her desk her notes placed besides them. He looked around. The dress wasn't here. He looked in her closet and noticed it was half-empty. He went to her bathroom, finding it completely bare, the only thing in there was her shower-products. He frowned. He knew Caroline used other products than shampoo and conditioner. Where were her things?

He walked out of her bathroom again, seeing her laptop on her desk, her phone charger on her bed-table. Everything seemed to look normal, besides the missing clothes and beauty-products.

He flashed out of the house and to his car, driving to the Salvatore boarding house. Not bothering to knock, he walked right in and saw the Bennett witch and the ripper hunched over a map. The other Salvatore was nowhere to be seen.

"Where is she?" He said, gaining the two's attention. The witch looked at him with wide eyes and Stefan narrowed his glare at him.

"Who?" The ripper asked, lifting a brow and Klaus smirked.

"Caroline. She loaned a dress for prom yesterday, and I was expecting her to bring it back, but she has not delivered it."

"She's not here." The witch quipped.

"I can see that." He growled. "Which is why I'm asking you where she is."

"She… left." Stefan said hesitantly and Klaus scowled.

"Left? To go where ripper?" Klaus said with a glare.

The two people in front of him exchanged worried glances and he growled. "I will compel you to tell me, Stefan!"

"I'm on vervain."

"Tell me where she is!" He said and flashed to him, grabbing him by the throat and slamming him against a wall. "Or I will have to use other methods to get the information."

"Stop! She left town!" The witch said quickly. "She turned off her humanity and left." She added quietly and looked down.

Klaus froze. Caroline had turned it off. His bright and beautiful Caroline had turn off her emotions. She snuffed the light that she held. Why would she do this?

He glared at Stefan, who gulped. "Why would someone like Caroline turn off her humanity? It was the thing she held on to the most."

"She… She just turned it off last night, after Elena…" Stefan said and widened his eyes.

"After the doppelganger, what ripper?" He asked in a growl.

"Tried to kill her mother and then stake her." He said in a low voice. Klaus let go of his throat and stepped back.

"And where is the doppelganger now?" He said in a vicious voice. "She will die for what she did to Caroline."

The witch widened her eyes and shook her head. "You can't! Elena is not herself, not after turning it off! She didn't mean it!"

He growled. "She will die for making Caroline turn off her humanity."

Stefan took a step towards the map. "We're trying to find Caroline now, but it's not easy. We'll find her and bring her back, Klaus. You don't need to kill Elena."

"I don't care, mate. The doppelganger is of no use to me anymore and she will pay for what she did." Klaus said simply. "Do a locater spell witch."

"Don't you think I tried that?!" The girl snapped at him. "She left nothing of hers back. No DNA, no beloved items to track her with."

"Track her phone or car." He said and glared at them.

"Her mother is doing that, but she said she would throw away her phone after her last call, and her car was found in Richmond, nothing in it." Stefan said and got a text and sighed. "And her phone is offline, last online a little outside of Virginia, over 4 hours ago."

Klaus paced around the room. "Use her mother."

"Liz?" The witch asked. "To what? She's doing what she can."

"For the locater spell, witch!" He snapped. "Use her blood to locate her daughter."

"We can't." Stefan said quietly.

Klaus snapped his head to him. "And why not?!"

"Liz can't give blood." The witch said. "She's a bleeder."

Klaus growled and paced again, before taking out his phone and calling one of his minions.

"Yes sire." His hybrid answered.

"I need you to and the others to find Caroline Forbes. Last heard from outside of Virginia." Klaus said harshly.

"Yes." He said and hung up and Klaus looked at the two people.

"Tell me exactly why she turned off her humanity." He ordered and saw the two gulp before nodding.

"As we said, she was almost staked last night and her mother almost killed by Elena. I saved her, but didn't think more about it and left with Damon and Elena, thinking she would just go home…" Stefan trailed off.

"And I thought one of the others were with her after, but we all met up here, not thinking much about her absence or who was with her." The witch continued. "Elena needed us."

"And Caroline didn't?" He hissed and glared at them.

They nodded. "I went to her house when Elena escaped and asked her to help find her, but she just turned it off, right in front of me and snapped my neck."

"We called her as soon as Stefan woke up and told us she turned it off! We just thought she was with Tyler. She said she didn't need our help, that she was better off without her emotions." The witch said and looked down. "That we didn't care about her, that I hated her. That we used her and she was done with being used and she didn't need us or her mom."

Klaus scowled. "And do you?"

"Do we what?" Stefan asked confused.

"Care about her? As I have observed you, her friends and family, only use her when it's convenient for you, only care for her when she is of use to you. I wonder what you did to keep her loyalty, because I certainly do not understand why she let you use her in the capacity that she did. You were no friends to her! You only noticed her when the doppelganger required it. So did you really care about her or do you hate her like she stated?" Klaus asked, calmly, his anger bubbling under his calm exterior.

"Of course we care about her! She's my best friend!" The girl snapped and Klaus grinned without emotion.

"Is she really? If she was your best friend, as you claim, then why did you not check on her after she almost died? Why did you not think to look after her when you noticed she was not here with you? Why did not one of your little gang question where she was or if she was all right? Where in this lies your friendship with Caroline?"

Stefan gulped. "Elena…"

"If I hear one more word of the doppelganger I will most certainly go and find her right now and tear out her heart, ripper!" Klaus growled.

"W-we didn't think! Caroline is always okay! She doesn't need…" The witch said, but he interrupted her.

"What doesn't Caroline need? Because clearly she needed one friend last night, that would be with her and not worry about the doppelganger! I agree that Caroline is strong, but neglect can break even the strongest minds, and you, the people she loves, have not shown her any attention or care or love, when she has needed it the most!" He shouted angrily before walking out of the house and driving to his mansion.

-X-

Caroline walked down the walk of fame, smirking with her sunglasses covering her eyes. She'd been in Los Angeles a month, and nobody had found her yet. She was quite pleased with herself and her ability to evade those people. She had been careful not to draw to much attention, starting rumours about a vampire on the loose and was certain she would be able to travel on within the next week.

She had compelled her way to a new identity, Julia Ross, and had gotten a new passport and every other thing she needed as Julia. Now she only needed to pack her things, raid a blood bank for the trip to Europe, she couldn't get hungry on an airplane and she would be good to go and explore the world.

She walked back to her hotel and opened the door to her room and found a smirking Kol sitting on her bed. She looked at him, not caring that he was there or what he wanted.

"What are you doing in my room?" She asked walking to her bed and put her bags down.

He grinned. "You've gotten my brother in quite the position, darling. He's very desperate to see you."

She shrugged. "And I should care because…"

"Oh, that's right. You don't care about anything right now, do you love?" Kol said and flashed to her.

"I don't care what your brother wants right now, Kol. I only care about what I want, and I want to stay away from Mystic Falls and everyone there." She said and looked at him with her cold and void eyes.

He nodded. "Your friends are desperately trying to find you, mind you, they are not having much luck, but then, they're not me." He said with a grin.

She sighed. "Can you get to the reason you're here, because I need to pack and compel myself a seat on a plane out of here."

"And where would you be going?"

She lifted a brow at him. "I might have turned off my humanity, but I'm not stupid. I'm not telling you where I'm going."

He laughed. "Of course not, darling, we'll just go back to Nik."

"I'm not going to come back with you to your obsessed brother and the people responsible for me turning off my humanity. I'm going to leave L.A., and you're going to let me." She said simply, not bothering to discuss the matter further.

"I believe you will come back to your little town, darling." He said with a smirk and mischievous eyes.

"And why would I ever do that?"

"Nik will start killing those pesky little friends of yours soon, darling. Starting with the doppelganger." He said and grinned.

She shrugged. "And I should care why? They were the ones that forced me to make this choice, I don't care about them or if they live. But please tell your brother to give Damon an especially painful death."

He frowned. "Your mother is losing her mind, trying to find you."

She chuckled. "Really? That's the best you have? Elizabeth is playing the doting and loving mother, trying to find the daughter she hates?" She said with a smirk. "Don't think so!" She sing-songed.

He narrowed his eyes. "Nik will torture your friends slowly, making sure they feel the most amount of pain, not being able to heal, which your little witchy friend can't even do on a normal Monday. He will kill them slowly, maybe bite them and slip into their minds during their hallucinations, making them think you're the one killing them. They will blame you for their deaths."

She gave him a wide grin that didn't reach her eyes. "Tell him to say hi to them for me, and that they brought it on themselves. They deserve nothing less of what your brother wants to do to them. Including Bonnie, I hope he turns her before killing her, making her loose her magic and connection to nature, just to show her how it is being turned and how it is living with the knowledge that her own friends, family and other witches hates her for turning, even though it wasn't her choice."

He stared at her. But she continued. "I hope he does his mind-witchy thing on Elena, making her realize that the Salvawhores didn't actually love her, but the woman she looked like. That she isn't the centre of the universe and that not every man in the universe wants her. I want her to feel like I felt for my entire life. Overlooked, unloved and uncared for. I want her to go insane and then loose her heart, right in front of the Salvawhores, just because it would be so funny to have them witness their eternal love, lose her heart because of their behaviour towards me. I hope Stefan goes ripper again, losing his faith in humanity and himself, because that's what he made me feel. I hope he looses himself so much, that he will be begging Klaus to kill him." She said and walked to her closet, finding her suitcase and began packing it. "And I wish I could be there to kill Damon, but sadly, I have other plans. Plans that doesn't include me going back to Mystic Falls and being forced to turn my humanity back on. I sincerely hope Damon gets the worst death of them all; he's earned that much from me. I hope he gets used as a bloodbag, a sex toy and compelled to enjoy every minute of it. I hope he dies in the most gruesome way your brother can think of."

He looked at her intensely and she arched a brow. "What?"

"Your friends are certainly not your trigger. You wouldn't wish or even say things like that if they were, but if they can't get you back, then who or what can?"

She shrugged. "Don't know, really don't care either." She said and continued her packing. "Elizabeth can just rot in hell, go bat-shit crazy or something. I really don't care about that hypocrite. Tell Klaus he can kill her too if he needs to let out some steam."

Kol laughed. "You would sentence your own mother to that?"

"Why not? She has ignored me my entire life. She hates me and what I am, I know. She's more interested in Elena than her own daughter, her own blood. So why should I care what happens to the woman who gave birth to me, but never acted like a parent? She is nothing more than an incubator I lived in for nine months and couldn't wait till I would leave her alone to fuss over her work or Elena Gilbert, the perfect little girl. You can understand, right? I mean, your mother tried to kill you, mine never acknowledged me or loved me, only Elena." Caroline shrugged and turned her back to him. "Now, are you going to go back to Klaus and tell him what I want or what?"

"I think you should come back yourself and tell him, darling."

"Mhm… No, but thanks for the offer, though. I would love to kill them and all, but as I said before, I have different plans." She said and packed the rest of her things, frowning when she had to leave some her stuff. She shrugged; it was only things from her former life. She saw the vervain-bomb she always had ready if she needed it, and grabbed it discretely and closed her suitcase and lifting it, making sure she had all her important documents on her. She looked at Kol. "Are we done with this conversation now or do I need to tell you more of how I fantasize my former friends and human incubator dies?"

He walked closer to her, his pupils dilating. "You will come with me."

She snorted and cocked a brow. "Do you really think I would let myself be that vulnerable? I'm vervained up to my fucking eyeballs, Kol."

He smirked at her. "Can't blame a guy for trying."

She shrugged. "Nope, but I really must leave, because I don't intend to stay here when you know I'm here, and I don't intend on going back with you, so bye." She said and walked past him, but he flashed in front of her, and she threw the vervain-bomb at him, making him hiss. She dropped her luggage and used the fact the he was temporarily neutralized and snapped his neck.

-X-

Klaus roared into the phone as he heard a neck being snapped and the other occupants in his sitting room looked up at him, scared. "KOL!"

No answer came and he huffed, frustrated he ran a hand through his hair. He knew he shouldn't have let Kol go alone to her.

"She's smarter than she gets credit for." Damon said with a smirk. "But she could have been a little nicer about our deaths."

Klaus glared at him. "Just be glad that she would regret me or her killing you when she gets her humanity back."

The doppelganger looked scared and hurt at the phone, he had now hung up. He smirked at her.

"What is it little doppelganger? Can't stand to hear how much Caroline hates you? How you ruined her life?" He asked and turned to an equally disturbed-looking witch. "Or how she wishes you would get to go through the same she did, and have your friends and family hate you, for something you were forced to do? Much like you did to her? Or is it the fact that she knows she's not important to any of you and isn't hurt or annoyed by that? That you won't have her to sacrifice when things gets tough for you?"

Stefan and Damon glared at him, before turning to the two girls. "She didn't mean any of it, she's not herself." Stefan said and Klaus laughed.

"Really mate? That's what you think? Tell me doppelganger, when you were without your humanity, did you mean what you said? Did you want to teach Caroline a lesson? How did you feel about her before you turned it off?"

She remained quiet and looked down on her hands in her lap, making him smirk. "Exactly. She might not have her humanity, but she very much means what she says. That doesn't change just because you don't care; rather it makes you realize things you suppressed. So no, she meant every last word of what she said and who of you can blame her? You have neglected her, used her for your gain, letting her be tortured, made her feel unwanted, unloved and uncared for, as she said. She is not just going to come back to you, even with her humanity on, you lot made sure of that yourselves, by not being there for her."

Klaus called one of his hybrids closest to L.A.X. and told him to go to LAX immediately and see if he could catch her, and not to underestimate her.

-X-

Caroline groaned at the pain in her neck and her massive headache. She opened her eyes and found herself lying in a bed that was definitely not hers. She looked around the room and tried to get up, but couldn't move her arms. She looked at her hands and saw the chains. She growled.

"What the hell?!" She shouted. "Who ever you are, I will kill you!"

At this Klaus came into the room with a smirk on his face. He walked to her and took of her chains and dragged her with him around his mansion. She rolled her eyes; of course, she should have known she was there.

"What is the meaning of this Klaus?" She asked bored. "I'm pretty sure I killed your dear brother, is this your revenge or something?" She asked as they walked into his living room, where her former friends and mother sat and looked at her nervously. She rolled her eyes. "Really? This is what you think will make me turn it back on? Seeing a group of people I don't know in your living room?"

He smirked at her and shook his head as he made her sit on a chair and tied her to it with chains. "We're just going to try different things, love." He said and she looked around the room, seeing Kol coming in.

"Darling, you're faster than you look." He said with a smirk and sat on a couch. "I underestimated you, but I forgive you for snapping my neck."

"Gee, thanks. It was touch and go for a moment, whether or nor I could live with myself after doing it." She deadpanned and looked back at Klaus. "What do you think you're going to accomplish by doing this?"

He shrugged and took a step back and turned to the rest of the people in the room. "You can begin your things now."

They nodded and looked at her, all of them with wearying expressions, before Elena stepped forwards and looked at her with sympathy. Caroline looked expectantly at her, raising a brow.

Elena took another step towards her and opened her mouth. "Care…"

"Yes." She sighed. "That's something you don't do." At that Kol chuckled but shut up as Klaus hit the back of his head.

"You know that's not true, Caroline. I care about you; you're my best friend! You don't want to do this, trust me! I know it's not something I could live with. Take it from me, you can't keep doing this, it will only be worse when you turn it back on." Elena said with tears in her eyes.

Caroline sighed and rolled her eyes. "Really? Even me turning off my humanity becomes about you, Elena. I'm not your best friend, hell; I'm not even your friend. I'm just some girl you can afford to loose. When have you ever cared about my well-being? Was it when Damon used me as a bloodbag and sex toy? Was it when you knew he was going to kill me? Was it when Jules and the werewolves were torturing me? Was it when you, yourself, tried to kill me? When did you care? Because as I see it, you never did, you only saw me as a way to keep yourself alive, while I, the stupid pathetic weak Caroline Forbes, tried to be your best friend." She said in boredom, she just wanted this to be over so she could leave again.

"Besides, I can control myself, I'm not you. I haven't killed any humans and I drink from bloodbags. I know how to control myself, unlike you. You were never good at controlling yourself, not even as a vampire. You're so emotional and predictable, so pathetic. I realize I was pathetic, but at least I don't need 10 people just to keep me fucking alive! I'll bet that if you were left on your own, you would turn it off again, because then there would be no one to give you attention, which you so desperately crave, it's sickening really."

Caroline watched Elena shed a few tears with a smirk on her face. "Oh, did I hurt your precious feelings? Quick, run to your Salvatore for the week and cry on their shoulder before screwing his brother, it's what you do best after all. I'm actually excited to see who it is your fucking right now? Stefan or Damon? The ripper or the rapist? Which one is it Elena?"

At this Elena turned her back to Caroline and went to stand besides Bonnie, who hugged her tightly. Caroline rolled her eyes at her antics. "Really? Now you're embarrassed that you're a slut? Not really the right time for that, Elena."

"Okay, enough of that Blondie." Damon said and walked to her and Caroline grinned at him, cocking her head to the side.

"What? Can't the scary Damon Salvatore handle when someone tells his doppelganger the truth? Are you afraid she'll choose Stefan again? Don't worry, she'll come back to you when she gets tired of your brother, I'm sure." Caroline said in a mocking voice.

Damon walked to her with a smirk. "I'm not the one who should worry here Blondie. You're the one without any humanity, which we have to force back, that isn't always fun."

Caroline shrugged. "Give it your best shot, Salvatore, you already have, remember? Don't you remember when we first met? When you compelled me to be your personal little bloodbag? When you compelled me to stop screaming? To let you do whatever you wanted to me? When you used me as your own little slave? When you confirmed the worst thoughts I had about myself? When you basically told me I would be better off dead? I do. I remember it so vividly and you have no idea how much I want to kill you for what you did to me, and now I have nothing standing in the way of doing that. I don't have to care about if Stefan and Elena get hurt because of your death. I just get to kill your pathetic ass. You can't even get a girl without having to compel her first. How desperate are you? Not even Elena chose you herself; her sire-bond did that for her. You're never the choice, always getting your brothers scrappy seconds. With Katherine, with Elena, hell I wanted Stefan before I wanted you. You are eternally the second choice, like me, welcome to the club!" She said with a smile as Damon scowled at her and flashed to her, grabbing her by the throat.

"I don't care what I have to do to make you turn it on, Barbie, I'll do it. Elena, Bonnie and your mother haven't deserved this from you." He hissed in her ear and she laughed.

"Really? They haven't deserved it? From where I'm standing they deserve so much more, Damon. They, much like you and your brother, used me. Elena doesn't care about anyone but herself, Bonnie cares about no one but Elena and Elizabeth is just the biggest hypocrite on earth. She loves Elena, is your friend, but when it comes to her own daughter, her own blood being a vampire; she's disgusted. She can't get away from me quickly enough, she never could. Not even when I was a little girl. Always chose everything else above me, never a second thought about me, so why should I care now? I tried. I tried being the best I could, and not one of you in the room appreciated that. I don't even know why you're doing this? What do you stand to gain from me turning on my humanity? You never cared before, so why now? What's happening to the precious Elena that I need to sacrifice myself for your cause?"

Damon scoffed and stepped back to the group, looking at Stefan, who nodded slightly. Caroline looked to her mother. "What is it Elizabeth? You don't like seeing what your parenting created? What your neglect turned out? What did you expect? That I would be the loving and caring daughter? That I would actually think of you as my mother and not a human incubator?"

Liz shook her head as her eyes became watery and turned to Damon. "I can't do this, call me when Caroline is back." She said and began walking out of the room.

"This is Caroline! This is me; I'm just honest for the first time in a long time! It's not my fault you failed at being a mother! That you couldn't even keep your attention on me for a second to show me love and care like any other parent is not my fault! You better begin accepting this Caroline, because the weak and pathetic excuse for a vampire you knew before is not coming back! That girl is dead! She died the night Elena tried to kill me! The night I finally realized I didn't matter! That everyone was more caught up with Elena Gilbert, yourself included Elizabeth, so you better say your goodbye now, because your little girl is never coming back." Caroline shouted after her mother and heard the front door close and turned to smirk at the group of people in front of her. They all looked at her in horror, she shrugged. "What? I just told her the truth."

Stefan walked to her, hunching in front of her, laying a hand on her arm. She looked down at his hand. "This isn't you, Caroline. You're not one to loose your own emotions, you're always caring for everyone, always helping everyone you love, never giving up on us, so don't give up now."

She continued looking at his hand on her arm, finally trying to shrug it off, but the chains kept her arm on the armrest. She shrugged and looked him in the eyes. Not offering any talk or response to what he said.

"We were all so worried about you. Where you were, if you were still alive, if you were okay. You know we all care about you, Caroline. You're my best friend, my sober buddy and my link to my humanity. You're the one helping me when the ripper comes forth, and the one to help me through everything. I need you, Caroline. Please come back." Stefan said vulnerable.

Caroline looked at him, not feeling anything. That was new. She always felt her heart swell when Stefan would say something like that to her. Make her believe she was important, but not now. "How long have you rehearsed that speech, Stefan?" She asked and received a laugh from Kol. "You're right, though. The pathetic Caroline is your best friend, your sober buddy and all, but I'm not. You made sure of that. To think that I wouldn't have turned off my humanity that night, if you would've come for me, not for Elena. If you would've knocked on my door to be there for me, for once, instead of Elena. I always listened to you, helped you through whatever problems you had, but the one time I needed help, where were you? With Elena! Helping Elena. Always her, never Caroline. I gave you everything, helped you whenever you asked me and it still wasn't enough, was it?! Never enough for you to notice me! Never enough for you to just stop with the Elena-talk and listen to what I had to say. I must admit, you were excellent at manipulating me into thinking you cared about me, that you wanted to help me but you always end up showing your true intentions, Stefan." Caroline said with a shrug before continuing. "Now I'm telling you that the old Caroline, the helping Caroline, will never, ever happen again. I'm done with being this group's doormat. I'm done with being taken for granted. I don't need any of you, not even you Stefan. You're the one that needs me, your sober buddy, but she's gone. You made sure she wasn't available to you when you always think of Elena, who doesn't care about anyone but herself. I'm not going to turn it back on, because you tell me I'm your best friend and that you need me, that's still not about me. That isn't going to help me at all Stefan."

Stefan looked shocked at her before taking his hand away from her arm and going back to the group. Caroline smirked and looked to Klaus. "Are we done now? Can I get back to my earlier plans of leaving?"

He smirked back at her and walked to her. "Not quite yet, love."

She sighed. "Seriously? You think you can make me turn it back on? You? Klaus, the original hybrid? The man who literally doesn't care about anyone but himself?"

He shrugged. "I could always wait for the vervain to get out of your system and compel you, love."

Caroline nodded. "You could, but I would never forgive you for compelling me and I know you don't want me hating you. Ask Damon why that would be a bad idea, he has done it before."

Klaus seemed to think about what she'd said. "I know, love. I'm not going to compel you to turn it back."

"Great, then lets get these chains off and I can return to my plans of leaving." She said in mock-enthusiasm.

Klaus shook his head with a smirk. "Not quite what I had I mind, Caroline." He said and grabbed her hand; making her close her eyes and find herself back in the old Lockwood cellar, sitting across from Tyler. It was back when his witches had taken her and Tyler for his stupid sacrifice.

"This is the first time I saw you… In my own body, not the hunter's." Klaus said and walked into the room, looking down at her.

"I don't remember you being here, Klaus. In fact, I'm pretty sure you weren't here and that we met for the first time when you turned Tyler to a hybrid." Caroline said and pulled on the chains.

He chuckled and walked to her. "I was here. I had to see whom it was I was sacrificing." He said and stopped in front of her. "The chains won't break, love."

She huffed but instantly relaxed her arms. "I still don't get how this is supposed to make me turn it back on."

He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and caressed her cheek. She wanted so badly to lean into his touch, but he didn't deserve that. Didn't deserve her forgiveness. "I'm showing you that you're important. That you're cared for. When I saw you down here, you caught my eye, love. Your strength, your soothing words to the Lockwood-boy. Even when you were in an impossible situation, you never stopped trying to make others feel better, never stopped trying to help other people. You drew me in, love. And every other time I got to see you, was merely a bonus."

Caroline closed her eyes, not wanting to look at him anymore. She could feel those annoying emotions, the need to be needed come back and she wasn't about to let that happen.

"This is not real. It's not real. Not real." She kept chanting, believing it, because she knew and she opened her eyes again, finding herself back in the Mikaelson mansion, everyone's eyes at her. Klaus had taken a step back. She looked around the room before smirking. "Did you really think that Klaus was my emotional trigger?"

Kol walked to her and brushed his thumb against her damp cheek. She frowned. When did that happen? "You're crying. My brother must have done something right."

Caroline glared at him. "Don't count those traitorous tears for anything. Klaus didn't do anything right, but simply remind me why I did what I did. Not even he could choose me. He merely reminded me of why this is so much better than what I was before."

Klaus looked at her confused. "What do you mean, love?"

She sighed and rolled her eyes. "You sent me back to a memory where Tyler was there, the guy who cheated on me. Who left me here all alone with no one. He cheated on me with the same girl you fucked at prom. The were-slut. So why would our little trip down memory-lane spark anything in me, when you're just reminding me that everyone leaves me? That I will never be someone's priority." She said and looked at Klaus, who was obviously uncomfortable. She smirked at him. "Oh… Yeah, I knew about you screwing Hayley. I actually came here that night, before I turned it off. I wanted to return your dress and maybe have some company, but when I got here I could hear you, so loudly. It was heart breaking. The pathetic Caroline actually cried over you. She ran away so fast from this house because, even though you said you wanted me, you still couldn't seem to choose me."

"Oh, for Christ's sake!" Kol said and grabbed her hand, forcing her to stay awake while he searched her mind. He went to every memory. Every emotion she had ever had.

"Get out of my head, Kol!" Caroline shouted and shut her eyes. "Get out! Get out! Get out!"

She heard him chuckle and felt him release his grip on her hand and she opened her eyes, glaring at him. He smirked at her. "You have some dark thoughts in there, darling."

Caroline only glared at him, not bothering to say something, she knew he was going to do the talking anyway.

"Tell me something, Caroline." He drawled and walked to refill his whiskey-glass. "How did a bright, little baby vamp like you get so dark thoughts? About her friends? Her family? Herself?"

Caroline rolled her eyes and shrugged. "When you go your whole life not being noticed, not being appreciated, you tend to become bitter, Kol, you should know the feeling. Didn't your brother lock you in a coffin for like a million years? Don't you want revenge for his disregards of your feelings? Your life?"

Kol turned to her and chuckled. "You might be able to get to your friends, darling, maybe even make my brother feel ashamed, but not me. You don't know me at all, little one."

"But why would you, Kol Mikaelson, the fun original, want a baby vamp to turn on her humanity? I promise, I'm not nearly as fun with it on, as I am right now. I think you and I could have fun, after all, you are the one with the baseball bats, right? I always loved to destroy things." Caroline said with a smirk. "All you have to do is get these chains off me and we can destroy or kill anything you want to, Kol. Come on, it'll be fun!" She said and laughed.

Kol smirked at her and walked closer to her. "Afraid not, darling. We can have our fun sometime else, right now I have to do as Nik says or he'll dagger me."

Caroline rolled her eyes. "Are you seriously afraid of a little dagger? Come on. Aren't you originals supposed to be the mightiest vampires on earth and here you are. One sulking because he thought I didn't know about his little slut and the other afraid of his big brother. Are you really that pathetic? Where's Rebekah? At least she has some balls, unlike you two. You know, with my humanity off she is actually someone I could enjoy. She's a bitch, sure, but she's honest about being a bitch unlike other people. At least Rebekah hates me enough to want to either kill me or set me free, just to spite Klaus."

"Ah…" Kol drawled and smirked. "Dear Bekah. She's not home at the moment, being busy with your little cheerleading team and all."

"Squad." Caroline said.

"Beg your pardon?" Kol said confused.

"Cheerleading squad, not team."

"Yes, our dear sister had taken over your posse and is now the supreme Blonde at your pathetic little school." Kol said and rolled his eyes. "Why she bothers with all that I will never understand."

"She's alone. Her only company for the last thousand years has been her asshole brothers, who don't give a shit about her, other than using her in their schemes. She want's a place to belong, and she fits right in at high school, being the stereotypical mean cheerleader." Caroline said and looked at Klaus. "Now that we know I won't turn my humanity back on, either by those people or you trying to show me you care, can you let me go? I really want to go explore and you're kind of keeping me from doing that."

Kol laughed. "You really think we're letting you go now that we know how to get your humanity back?"

"What?" Caroline hissed and snapped her head to glare at Kol. "You don't kn…"

"I was in your head, remember darling?" He said with a smirk. "And you do act like Bekah, so I'm guessing what you just said about my dear sister must apply to you too. You want to find a place to belong, or what you just said. It's only a matter of time now darling, either you turn it back on willingly, or I will start using the information I gathered from your pretty little head."

"And if I say no, you're going to what? Tell me how miserable I am? How pathetic I am? Newsflash, I know." Caroline retorted with a smirk.

Kol looked to Klaus and nodded before they both grabbed her hands and she felt herself being pulled into her own memories.

She stood besides them at her front porch, watching her father leave. Seeing her eight-year old self cry, telling him not to leave her, to stay and be her daddy. She watched her father get into his car and drive away, not even looking back. Not saying goodbye. She watched as her mother came and took her hand, dragging her inside the house, telling her to stay inside until the babysitter came and leaving without another word. She watched the little girl cry herself to sleep. Nobody trying to comfort her.

"Not even your father loved you enough to stay for you, Caroline. Didn't even care enough to say goodbye." Kol said and looked at her. "Your mother blaming you for your father leaving. Putting her work before you. You were never important enough to either of them. They didn't love you. Not then, not now."

Caroline glared at him, feeling her cheeks getting wet, but quickly ran her hands over them, wiping the tears away. "What do you think you're doing?" She hissed. "I know this already! I was never good enough to anyone, not enough to make them stay! I'm not stupid! I remember it!"

The scene changed and they ended up at her 7th grade science fair, where she won first place. She watched her younger self look for her mother in the crowd. For someone she loved to congratulate her. She watched Elena get placed second, her whole family and friends coming to her and smiling, telling her how proud they were of her, hugging her. She watched as no one came to say those things to her. Her younger self just standing there, her diploma in hand, alone, tears in her eyes, alone and forgotten, yet again.

"Your mother didn't even care to come and see your project, did she? Didn't care to come and congratulate you. No one came for you, Caroline. You weren't important enough, not even Bonnie or Elena came and congratulated you, even though they were 10 feet away. Did your mother tell you later how proud she was you won first place? Did she hug you when you got home with the diploma?" Kol asked with a smirk before continuing. "No, she didn't, did she? She never came to get you from the school; you had to walk home, alone. Get home to an empty house and make yourself dinner because once again you weren't a priority for your mother."

"Stop! I don't care!" Caroline shouted, tears flowing down her cheeks and the scenery changed again, as they ended up at the carnival, the night she turned. She stiffened as she watched herself kill the carnival-worker. She closed her eyes. "I don't want this! Please just stop!"

Kol chuckled and Klaus took her hand and she found herself opening her eyes. She saw herself sitting alone, again. Always alone as Damon came to her, telling her it would be okay. That he could help her. She watched as he hugged her and raised the stake at her heart, ready to stake her, but Stefan intervened. She watched Bonnie's disgust with her, how her and Elena stood together, always those two together against her. She watched Stefan taking her to the bathroom, trying to wash away the blood as he tried to reassure her that she wasn't a monster.

"You were alone when you turned. Didn't have any clue about what was going on. You couldn't control yourself and sought safety at your sire, but even he didn't see your worth, did he Caroline? Damon tried to kill you, not believing you to have what it takes to be a vampire. You weren't strong enough, not good enough. Not even Elena and Bonnie cared enough about you to help you through your transformation, looking at you with disgust and anger. Angry that you couldn't control yourself. That they had to deal with you and your bloodlust. Angry that you now knew what happened around you, that you were needed know, instead of happily oblivious about everything around you." Kol said and looked at her with a smirk. "Do you know why Stefan saved you from Damon that night?"

Caroline kept quiet, tears streaming down her cheeks now. She didn't even bother to wipe them away. Kol walked closer to her, an evil grin on his face. "Do you, Caroline? Why did Stefan save you? Why did the boy, who rejected you, suddenly care about whether you lived or died? Why darling? What happened?"

Caroline took a step back, releasing Klaus hand from her grip and shook her head. "I… It…" She trailed off and looked up at Klaus, hoping to gain something from him, but he just stood there, looking at her with longing in his eyes. She shook her head and cried, feeling her emotions return full force as she shouted. "Because of Elena! Always because of fucking Elena Gilbert!"

Caroline opened her eyes and found herself in the Mikaelson mansion, still chained to the chair as Kol and Klaus let her hands go and she bowed her head and sobbed quietly. "Get me out of these!" She cried and felt Klaus removed the chains as the group walked towards her, Stefan reaching her first and taking her hands in his. She sobbed harder, all the abandonment, the manipulation coming back to her.

"You're okay, Care." He whispered, trying to comfort her as Elena and Bonnie walked closer to her.

"We're here now, Care." Bonnie said in a soothing voice, but none of it helped her. All she remembered was how they didn't care about her, how she wasn't a priority, how they had looked at her when she turned.

"Get away from me." She said quietly, hoping they would leave her alone. They didn't listen and continued trying to comfort her, manipulating her again, trying to make her believe she mattered in their eyes. She got angry, how stupid did they think she was? She pulled her hands from Stefan and quickly stood up, taking a step back, making the chair fall over. "I said get away from me!" She hissed and looked at their shocked faces.

"Caroline?" Stefan asked and looked at her confused, but she shook her head, crying. She needed to get away from here. She couldn't be here anymore. She looked at Klaus, who flashed to her, enveloping her in a hug and she let herself cry into the crook of his neck.

"What did you do to her?!" Elena asked angrily and Kol laughed.

"I showed her the truth, what she needed to see and realize to turn her humanity back on. And she realized where she would find what she needed."

Caroline didn't say anything for a long time, just standing in Klaus' arms, mourning herself, mourning for the friendships she never had, mourning for her mother's absence. Before she pulled back and smiled weakly at him. "I can't stay here."

"What? Of course you can, Care! You have to stay!" Bonnie exclaimed and walked towards her.

Caroline snapped her head to the group of people. "No, I really can't because I'll kill you if I do. You might not love or care about me, but I don't want to kill you, so I have to leave because seeing you will always remind me of how little you think I'm worth, how little my own mother thinks I'm worth. So I'm leaving."

Klaus ran his hands up and down her back soothingly, making her relax. He nodded and smiled at her. "I'll take you wherever you want, love."

Caroline nodded and laid her head on his shoulder as her former friends looked at her confused and angry.

"You're picking Klaus? He's evil, Caroline! He doesn't love or care about you!" Elena hissed.

Caroline glared back at her. "I'm choosing me, Elena! For the first time in my life, I'm choosing the one person here who hasn't hesitated choosing me first! Klaus never used me like you have! He never asked me to sacrifice myself! I'm choosing the person who wanted me for me. He hasn't judged me for being what I am. Hasn't tried to change me into something I'm not. He may not love me, but he cares a hell of a lot more about me, than you do, Elena."