Author's note: As of this chapter, the rating on this story has been raised to M. Enjoy.
~***~
While Jessimyn and her playthings were gone, Zevran found himself feeling very bored. Leliana busied herself with flitting about, trying to discover what was going on in the palace, but Zevran cared little for these dwarves and their politics. He was glad Jessimyn had said she wouldn't get involved, but he wondered if that would still be the case if Leliana found some damning evidence to indicate who had done the poisoning. Luckily for him, the dwarves seemed even more suspicious of outsiders than they had when they'd been in Orzammar before, and few people would talk to a human. Most evenings Leliana returned to the tavern more frustrated than when she left.
"Zev," she had whined to him one night. "Maybe if you tried, too, you could discover something."
He'd been trying to finish a foul-tasting brew when she'd accosted him. "My dear Leliana," he'd said. "If they won't talk to a human, they surely won't talk to an elf. Best you just leave it alone. Now be a good girl and come sit on my lap."
No matter how hard he tried, Leliana refused to get drunk with him. Normally he wouldn't have bothered, but he was bored, and even if the dwarves would talk to him, he found none of them worthy of his time. He'd liked Oghren well enough, but these Orzammar residents were much too uptight and secretive. But what else could he do except wait for Jessimyn and her little band to return.
It was almost exactly a week after they'd left that they did return. Zevran had been sitting in the tavern, as was usual, and Leliana was off, Maker knew where, trying to piss off every dwarf in the whole place. He'd overheard plenty of comments from the other patrons about the annoying human who couldn't keep her nose where it belonged. He heard a commotion coming from outside, and he'd gone with the half the tavern to see what was going on.
"It's the Grey Warden," he heard someone say, and it was then that he caught sight of her. He frowned when he spotted Jakob. Too bad the man had survived... but wait. There was someone missing. Theon wasn't with them. He sighed and moved through the little crowd, trying to get closer. Jessimyn had already passed the tavern, on her way to the inn, but he could tell by the slump of her shoulders that it would not be a joyous homecoming. She had known she wouldn't be bringing everyone back with her, but Zevran supposed that didn't make things any easier on her.
And why did it have to be Theon? Zevran had liked the man, and he was sure Jessimyn had, too. The knight had actually reminded him a bit of Alistair... without all of the annoying attempts at humor, of course. At least the other two were still with her.
Zevran shoved his way past the last few people, eliciting a few harsh words from the dwarves who were blocking his path, but he didn't care. When he got to the inn, the group was nowhere to be seen, so he went up to Jessimyn's room and knocked. When she opened the door, she seemed surprised to see him.
"Oh, it's you," she said.
Zevran gave a quirk of his lips. "You do know how to make a man feel missed. Were you expecting someone else, perhaps?"
She walked back inside, and Zevran followed her. "I'd asked them to bring up a tub and some water, actually. I want to bathe and eat, and then I want to leave."
"So soon?" Zevran teased. "But I was just starting to like it here."
Jessimyn was saved the need to respond when there was another knock at the door. Two dwarven men hauled in a large, copper tub, and they were followed by a string of servants carrying buckets of hot water. The tub was filled quickly, and Zevran was once again alone with Jessimyn.
"I guess I should leave you to it, then," said Zevran, starting towards the door.
"You don't... you don't have to," said Jessimyn. When Zevran's eyebrows shot up, she added quickly, "I'm not inviting you to join me, and I'm going to put up this screen between us, but if you wanted to stay and... talk..."
Now that was strange. Jessimyn never offered to talk about things. He'd always had to drag everything out of her. He pulled up a chair and sat down with his feet propped up. "Of course, but I do hope this 'talking' involves you describing everything you're doing that I can't see."
Laughing softly, Jessimyn dragged the privacy screen in front of the tub, and in a few moments Zevran heard the soft splash of water as she climbed in. "So how bad was it? How are you handling it?" Zevran asked, and there was a long pause.
"Worse than I expected," came Jessimyn's voice from behind the screen, and Zevran was surprised at the amount of misery he heard there. "I knew what would happen, what could happen, yet I stupidly hoped that everyone would come out okay. I don't know how Duncan managed doing this all the time. I don't know how I'm going to manage going through all of this again in the future. I just wish..."
Zevran waited, hearing only little splashes for a while. "You wish...?" He prompted.
There was a long sigh. "I wish there was someone here who really understood. Don't get me wrong, I think you're wonderful, Zev. But as a Grey Warden, I feel very alone. From here, we head to Weisshaupt, and that has me terrified. I'm still new to all of this, really, and all I really know about the Grey Wardens, outside of the stories, is what Alistair has told me. And with all of this, with everything else I have to worry about, I can't help counting down the days. He'll be married in a little over two weeks."
With a growl, Zevran stood up and walked over, knocking the screen out of its place. Jessimyn shrieked and lowered herself into the soapy water, which in Zevran's mind did too good a job of obscuring his view. He knelt down beside her. "You've got to stop this. You are stronger than this. You are better than this. When are you going to realize that that part of your life is done? Alistair is not here anymore. Yes, he's going to be married. He's the king now, and he's going to have a queen, and it's not going to be you. But you're still a Grey Warden. You're still you. So stop moping like some lovesick little girl."
She pursed her lips. "I'm not moping, Zev. I'm... mourning." She reached up to rub her eyes with her soapy hands. "I'm mourning the life that hasn't turned out at all like I expected it to. Every time I find myself hoping for something... why are you smiling at me?"
Zevran chuckled. "No, it's not... it's just because you have soapy bubbles on your face." He reached up to wipe her cheek, letting his hand linger. "You must know by now there's no use in wishing for things. Mourning what could have been only means you miss out on the life that is."
"Maybe I'm not as strong as everyone thinks," Jessimyn said stubbornly. "Maybe I just hide it really well. And maybe I shouldn't have said anything to you in the first place. It's times like this that I miss..."
Zevran drew back, scowling. "Yes. Alistair again."
A slight smile graced Jessimyn's lips. "Actually, I was going to say Wynne. I think she was the only person who really knew how scared I was." She shook her head. "But it doesn't matter. You're right. I need to stop being so weak. Now, then. I suppose you should leave, so I can finish and get dressed. I'm starving."
Zevran smiled. "I never said you were weak, my dear. Perhaps you are just... tense? Yes, I'm sure your excursion has left you all wound up." He lowered his hand into the water until his fingers just touched her knee.
"Zev..." Jessimyn protested.
"Now, now. You invite me into your room, where you are completely naked, and you expect me to keep my hands to myself?" His fingers trailed ever so slowly up her thigh, but Jessimyn reached down and grabbed his wrist.
"Zevran!" Her voice was more forceful this time.
"You give yourself to that fool Teagan, yet I cannot even touch you? We are friends, are we not? Friends do make the best lovers, you know. No embarrassing flirtations, no awkward mornings after, and best of all, no expectations. As I said, you seem tense. Let me help relieve some of that tension."
Jessimyn lowered down even further into the tub, but her grip on his wrist loosened. He slid his hand the rest of the way up her thigh, watching her face to see if she was going to stop him again. When she made no move to do so, he ran the tips of his fingers over her, and he smiled as he saw her twitch. In a quick motion, he slid his fingers inside her, and Jessimyn let out a gasp. She closed her eyes and leaned her head back as Zevran slowly moved his fingers in and out, using his thumb to make circles over the tight little knot between her thighs where he knew all woman loved to be touched. He began thrusting his fingers into her faster and faster, and she brought her hips up to meet him.
"Oh, Maker," she gasped as she reached to clutch at the edges of the tub, and Zevran watched as her climax took her.
When she had calmed, Zevran withdrew his hand and leaned forward so his mouth was right next to her ear. "If that's what I can do with my hand," he whispered. "Just imagine what I can do with the rest of me. Next time, I'll show you what I can do with my mouth." Her soft moan pleased him greatly and he stood up. "Now then," he said, a wide grin on his face. "You must be hungry, so I'll see to that, and I'll let you finish your bath in peace." Without waiting for a reply, he left her room.
Zevran made his way back down to the common room of the inn. He was asking for food to be made and served to them in the private dining room when Leliana rushed in.
"Have you heard? Are they back?" She looked around. "Where are they?"
"They are freshening up, I believe. We'll have dinner in the private dining room tonight, then I expect that we'll be leaving in the morning."
"But..." Leliana pouted. "I'm so close. I've heard some very interesting rumors..."
"Theon didn't make it," Zevran said bluntly, and Leliana's eyes widened. "I don't think the others are taking it well, probably Jess worst of all." He pitched his voice low. "The last thing she needs to hear is your ideas about the poisoning of a king she cares nothing about. Just let it be. She'll be leaving in the morning no matter what you've found out, so if you want to be with her when she goes, just let it be."
"Fine," she said sulkily as she followed him into the dining room, but when Zevran turned to look at her again, she had a mischievous look in her eye. "But do tell me, Zevran. Why is your sleeve all wet?"
