The next morning…
Natalia left the apartment with Izabela and Andrzej to buy some food with the few zlotys they had left for their family. They bought a bag of potatoes, some bread and peas too. They should be good for a whole week if they were being reasonable.
On their way back home, Andrzej got himself a little job on the street. He would sell books on the sidewalk for entire days just to make the minimum of money. He ran home to tell the good news to his parents as his sisters walked slowly behind him. Natalia took Izabela's hand.
"Come on, it's time to get out of here"
"To go where? If we step out of here we're dead, remember?"
"We only have to deny ourselves"
"What?" Izabela exclaimed. "How dare you? It's a sin to deny your religion!"
"I sinned already, one more time won't kill me"
Izabela looked at her sister with disgust. She sinned and didn't confess herself. And now, she wanted to deny herself as a Jew?
"I'm not going anywhere and neither do you. There's gonna be others, you know, forget about him!"
Natalia opened her mouth to say something but closed it immediately. A big lump formed inside her throat and tears filled her big brown eyes. She ran in the opposite direction, leaving her sister behind.
"Natalia! Come back here!"
Natalia ran faster, bumping into everyone there. She wanted to be away from all of this. Away from the people that were holding her back from the life she really wanted. Big tears were falling down her cheeks and she fell on the ground. Her head knocked on the sidewalk and she passed out.
A few minutes later…
Natalia opened her eyes slowly after she felt cold water falling on her face.
A woman was sitting beside her, holding a bottle of water.
"Are you alright miss?" she asked when she saw that Natalia's eyes were open.
The young woman nodded to reassure the old lady that she was fine. She helped Natalia to get up and gave her two or three gulps of water before asking her where she lived. Natalia wasn't sure but they finally found the apartment block as they walked around. Andrzej was waiting for her in front of the block, pacing impatiently. He thanked the lady that brought his sister back and she left.
"Don't you do that ever again! You think you can run away like that? You scared the shit out of us" he lectured.
"Oh shut up already"
Andrzej got even more angry.
"Wait 'til you're up there, dad's gonna kill you"
Natalia rolled her eyes and walked to the door. She was used to be yelled at by her father. She surely wasn't scared of him anymore. She was used to be in trouble because she loved trouble. She lived for trouble.
Upstairs…
"No dinner for you tonight, young lady. No diary, book, or any other things that could entertain you" her father punished.
Taking away her diary was like taking away a part of her soul. She had to write in it every day. It was, starting now, her only friend.
"You won't cut her out on dinner, Krzyszrof" Natalia's mother said to her husband. "She hasn't eat anything in two days"
This was true and her sorrow seemed to eat for two.
"Alright" he resigned himself. " But no diary, book, and all this stuff. You stay in here for a week"
"A week? But… Papa!" Natalia shouted.
"Shall we go for two?" he asked.
Natalia pouted and crossed her arms, holding herself to add anything else and get in more trouble than she already was.
Her parents' friends always said to them that Natalia looked like an easy child. Calm and perfect. Every time, they simply laughed to their faces. If Natalia was an angel, they wondered what a devil child was like. She always asked for too much attention and since she was a kid, she looked for trouble all the time.
Later, at dinner…
The six members of the Kovalski family were sitting at the kitchen table and were saying grace before eating their meal. Natalia kept her eyes open and simply muttered some of the words, swinging her feet back and forth under the table. Her father opened his eyes when he heard her murmurs and he saw her looking at the ceiling, moving her legs under the table. He said nothing but he was deceived by her attitude. He knew she couldn't live like that. Natalia wasn't someone that you could throw somewhere and expect her to stay there against her will and do nothing about it. They finished the prayer and everybody opened their eyes.
"Let's eat"
Natalia crushed her face in her plate and ate everything in a few minutes, not bothering to use the fork and knife that were beside her plate. Everybody was looking at her, shocked by what they just saw.
"Is someone going to left something?" she asked, looking around at them.
"You want another potato, honey?" her mother demanded. "I can have another one ready for you" she added before she could answer.
She stood up from her chair.
"Nobody's going to have more of anything" her father exclaimed. "Especially you" he clarified, pointing at Natalia. "Money is flying out the window and we have to keep food as long as we can"
Natalia looked down. Her mother sat back on her chair. Nobody spoke. The silence was uncomfortable and no one dared to talk. She planted her fork into the potato that was in her plate and put it down in Natalia's.
"Mom, you have to eat" Natalia said, pushing her plate away slightly.
"Eat" she simply responded, tearing up.
"It's yours… I can't…"
"You have to eat, mama, it's important"
Henryk was so hungry, just like his sister, and he would've died to eat this potato but he simply couldn't because their mother shouldn't deprive herself for them.
"I'd rather give it to Talia so she has enough to eat. I'm not important" their mother declared, bursting into tears.
"I won't eat it… I can't do that…"
She took the potato back and gave Natalia her piece of bread. Natalia shoved it inside her mouth and ate it all up in one chew.
Meanwhile…
Zachary was sitting in the cafeteria with his friends and while they were talking, he simply moved his food in his plate with his fork, not bothering to eat it. Natalia has been gone for two days now and he hadn't eat anything but the half of a sandwich. He couldn't stop thinking about her but mostly about the night they had spent together. He didn't know if he would be able to see her again and it was killing him.
"You should eat, man" Scott said, sitting beside him.
"I'm not hungry" Zachary simply replied.
"There's millions of girls out there, you'll find the one someday" Kevin pointed out.
"You don't understand!" Zachary exclaimed. "She was the one, dude, it was her, and I let her go" he explained as he lent his fist on the table.
He got up and walked outside. He sat against the brick wall and buried his face in his hands before he started to cry profusely.
"Hey" Scott announced himself. "I'm sorry about what happened inside" he continued, sitting beside him.
Zachary shrugged.
"I'm gonna help you to get her out of there, alright?"
"Don't say things you don't intend to do"
"No, I'll do it. It's just that I don't know where to start…"
"Even if we tried… We're nothing against the Nazis. They're gonna take her someplace else before we even figure something out."
"If you're negative like that then you won't see her again. Do you want her or not?"
"Of course I want her! I just know that if I had too much expectations, in the end it will hurt me"
