Chapter 11: Fifth Year- Umbridge
Upon his entrance to the bustling activity and raucous noise of the Great Hall Merlin did little more than cast a glance along the teachers table before taking his seat.
Sitting in the expanded Great Hall was odd. He was used to standing and serving in this room. True he hadn't been back here in hundreds of years, but that didn't stop the déjà vu from whacking him on the back of his head.
The chattering students slowly took their seats and Dumbledore rose solemnly to his feet. Raising his hands to still the noise in the room Dumbledore spoke. "I would like to welcome to Hogwarts, our first years."
The doors in the front of the room swung open and Minerva led the bevy of diminutive first years to the front of the hall. Merlin eyed the hat which was brought out and set on the stool in front of the terrified children.
So this was the Sorting Hat? Though Merlin had never actively interacted with the founders of the school he had been...involved with their choice of location. He'd hated the thought of Camelot standing empty and the founders had been the last of the witches and wizards born to the Old Religion. The last of the truly powerful. The Sorting Hat had been one of those last magics. He was definitely curious to see it at work.
Everyone seemed to be waiting for something. Finally a crease just against the hat's brim widened and it began to sing. The hat had a voice like a piece of carpet. A very old piece of carpet. It was slightly musty, very dusty and just a little bit mouldy.
Merlin wasn't sure what it did should technically be called singing, but the message it presented; to stand firm against adversity, was certainly pertinent. Joining in the applause Merlin noticed many of the students muttering to each other. The teaching staff too looked a little surprised and Merlin noticed Dumbledore shoot a glance his way.
Merlin leant back in his chair while the first years were sorted into their new houses. The hat's magic was remarkably complex for something so simple. Looking into the minds of another was something that Merlin had never done; he had always felt that it was somehow intruding. However sorting the students between the houses based on their own personalities and base instincts was a good idea, though perhaps it did help breed the infamous rivalry between Slytherin and Gryffindor.
At the end of the sorting Dumbledore again rose to his feet smiling warmly across the crowd of young faces. "As always, welcome to our newest students and welcome back to our old hands. Announcements will be made after we have consumed the most excellent feast which has been prepared for us." The headmaster swept his hands outwards in a flamboyant gesture and suddenly the tables were full of food. Merlin's mouth watered. He hadn't realised how hungry he was until the rich smells floated up from the dishes to assail his nose.
Just as he was starting to pile food onto his plate, waiting politely for the witch beside him to finish with the chicken, the ghosts arrived. Merlin paused with his fork hovering over a potato.
The ghosts were mingling contently with the students; a couple had floated up to the teachers table and were chatting with one teacher or another. None of them spared him a glance. Breathing a sigh of faint relief Merlin went back to his dinner. Though it was difficult to tell from this distance and on such semi-transparent forms, he didn't think there were any familiar faces.
It was not surprising perhaps that none of the knights or his old friends from Camelot were still here. Becoming a ghost required a certain fear of death that not even one of the round table knights possessed. Still in a way it would have been nice to see any of them again.
By the time the plates finally cleared Merlin was certain that his stomach was going to explode. He was sure he had never eaten that much in a single day let alone a single sitting before. Merlin watched the students lazily, they were chatting amongst themselves again. They all seemed so comfortable here. Merlin smiled, it felt good to see Camelot continuing to be the place of safety that Arthur had always wanted it to be.
The conversation around the room died down rapidly when Dumbledore once again rose to his feet.
"Welcome. Now this year we have a few staffing changes. As Professor Hagrid is currently on sabbatical Professor Grubby-Plank has kindly agreed to once again take on the job of teaching Care of Magical Creatures until he returns." Grubby-Plank waved a hand in acknowledgement of the applause of the students.
Merlin could see Harry and Ron muttering to each other and he could only assume that they were wondering again where Hagrid was. "Also may I introduce our Defence against the Dark Arts Professor Dolores Umbridge." The applause for the Ministry employed woman was about as cold as clapping could get. The pink clad witch however waved and smiled as though she had been given a standing ovation.
Merlin would have rolled his eyes, but he could see a cold sort of cunning in her face which made him deeply uncomfortable. This sensation wasn't appeased by the fact that not a minute later she interrupted Dumbledore's speech to make one of her own. Dumbledore sat down and gave her his full attention, to most it would have looked like he was eager to listen to her, but Merlin could see that while he was keen to see what Umbridge had to say the Headmaster also didn't want to anger her too much at this early stage.
Leaning back into his chair and partially tuning out of Umbridge's speech, a convoluted way of revealing that the Ministry intended to interfere at Hogwarts, Merlin considered this problem. Umbridge at this stage was an unknown. He had no idea of her skill as a witch, not that it should be much of a concern, and he had no idea of her influence at the Ministry or what influence she would have on the students. From what he had heard through the Order she was high on the chain of command in the Minister for Magic's office and Merlin wouldn't be surprised to find that she would collect some of the students to work and spy for her. Anyone who was looking for power would be attracted to a maligned influence like her.
With the end of Umbridge's speech Dumbledore completed his announcements and sent to students off to bed.
Merlin got to his feet with the other teachers, though he had no idea of what he was supposed to do. The castle had changed drastically since he had last been here and Merlin wasn't entirely sure that he would be able to find his way around.
Thankfully Dumbledore seemed to notice his indecision and sent Minerva his way. "Come along, I'll show you where your room is." The brisk witch set off immediately, obviously expecting him to follow. Merlin smirked and fell into step with her. Following the striding woman through the chilled and empty corridors was familiar in a surprisingly comforting way.
The corridors were different to those from Merlin's memory, their layout varied with the magic instilled into the castle over time. However following Minerva through the winding passages drew memories of carrying armloads of armour or balancing carefully prepared trays of food quickly up from the kitchens to the royal chambers on the higher levels.
Minerva led him down several flights of very mobile stairs towards what had once been the knight's quarters. She stopped in front of a full length portrait of a unicorn. Merlin resisted the urge to bow to the beautiful creature as it turned its glossy head and shining horn towards him. "Behind this is your room. The password can be changed, though I suspect you know that."
"Not really, how do I do it?" Merlin asked, still examining the unicorn. He loved magical pictures.
"Just tap the back of the portrait with your wand..." Minerva stumbled to a stop. "Do you have a wand?"
"No, never needed one. Don't worry I'll work something out." Merlin gave her a friendly grin and reached out his hand to the portrait. "Open." He said firmly, turning his back on the witch beside him to prevent her from seeing the glow of magic in his eyes. The picture swung forward, opening the way to his new room. "Thank you Minerva." He left the witch looking mystified and impressed.
Closing the portrait door behind him Merlin looked back and raised his hand again, pressing his fingertips to the wooden back of the door. "Kilgharrah." He said firmly. He'd change the password whenever he remembered, but he figured that names of people or beings that had never actively featured in the myths about his past were probably for the best.
Lowering his hand and turning around Merlin gaped. His cottage was simple and clean, he had never felt the desire to collect a large number of things and living in the lap of luxury wasn't something that he wanted or had ever been able to achieve. You needed money for that.
Compared to his cottage, even compared to Camelot in its hey-day these chambers were fabulous. Merlin looked through the three rooms with interest. It was almost a whole house. He wondered if Dumbledore was trying to butter him up.
Snorting in laughter Merlin made for the bedroom. The bed was a huge four poster and looked so comfortable that he was tempted to just lie down on the plum coloured covers and go straight to sleep. Resisting the temptation for the moment Merlin ducked into the adjoining bathroom and got ready for bed first.
The bathroom was an epic in itself. A huge gold filigreed tub took up half of the room, eight different taps of shining silver protruded from the polished stone wall begging to be used. Purposefully turning towards the large basin on the adjacent wall Merlin turned the smaller tap and watched the water flow. Unwinding his scarf, Merlin plunged his head into the basin once it was almost overflowing with water.
Shivering as the cool water ran down the back of his neck, Merlin scrubbed his hair dry with one of the fluffy towels which had been draped over their own rails for his use. Dumbledore was definitely trying to butter him up. Smiling Merlin wriggled out of his shirt and shrugged into the pyjamas that he had brought with him.
Someone had thoughtfully unpacked his bag and laid out his things.
So this was what it was like to have someone doing everything for him. Making a mental note to thank the Hogwarts house elves reverently when he found them Merlin padded back into the bedroom.
Stretching out under the covers Merlin gave the room a final look over. It was a little strange sleeping in Camelot again, even stranger to be sleeping in a knight's quarters instead of his own little room behind Gaius's workroom. Slowly, the long day was beginning to catch up with him, Merlin slid into a pleasantly dreamless sleep.
It was a little strange being able to wake up and not having to prepare breakfast for himself. Merlin had strolled into the Great Hall early the next morning, stuffed a fresh, warm bread roll with fruit and then headed out the front doors towards Hagrid's cabin. He had been one of the first people in, only two of the Professors were present, sipping on cups of tea and reading the paper and neither of them spared him a glance.
The little stone hut was deserted and set against the threatening darkness of the Dark Forest it seemed rather foreboding. Merlin chewed thoughtfully on his roll. For the moment he was in charge of the groundkeeping duties as well as being a general lackey for Grubby-Plank.
The substitute teacher was nowhere to be seen for the moment so Merlin stuffed the last of the roll into his mouth and set off into the forest. It had been a long time since he had been there and he was interested to see if there were as many magical creatures within the shaded borders as he had heard there were.
Picking his way through the forest was harder than Merlin remembered, the undergrowth was thick and there were many more tree roots protruding up through the soil. After fighting his way through a particularly feisty thorned bush Merlin stopped to catch his breath. The paths and roads which had been continuously maintained through the forest were apparently long gone. Tightening his scarf around his throat Merlin pushed on.
Here and there he could see signs of large creatures, some very large creatures. Pausing to take his bearing Merlin's ears caught the sound of hoof beats. Lots of hoof beats. Ducking behind a tree and watching carefully Merlin's eyebrows rose when a large herd of centaur males cantered into view. They passed by without seeing him, or so he thought.
Pressing on along the trail that the centaur's passing had created Merlin's heart leapt into his mouth and his magic tingled along his arms when the centaurs thundered over the rise to his left, completely surrounding him. A large black centaur stepped forward and examined Merlin with the sort of distaste that was normally reserved for unknown substances on the bottom of your shoe. Merlin was acutely conscious of the circle of arrows pointed at him. "Can I help you?" He asked as politely as possible.
The centaur stamped one hoof. "You are not welcome here human."
"I work up at the castle, at Hogwarts. I wasn't told that staff weren't allowed into the forest, only that the students weren't permitted here." Merlin replied, flexing his fingers in preparation. If he needed magic he was going to need it fast.
"This is our forest and we have made it clear to you humans that you are not welcome here." Another centaur noted, drawing his arrow a little further towards his cheek. The way they used humans, as though it were a dirty word made Merlin wonder who had been mistreating these people.
"The forest doesn't belong to anyone, are you telling me that you'd force all the other creatures who live here to leave?" Merlin folded his arms over his chest and looked back at the black centaur who stared down at him. "I don't think so."
"So be it." A flick of the black centaur's tail was all the warning Merlin got. It was also all the warning he needed. Most of the arrows shattered on the bowstrings sending their archers into a leg flailing panic. Four arrows made it into the air so Merlin sent them off to shatter harmlessly against the tree trunks which surrounded them.
This time there was no way to turn his head a little, or the distraction of crockery and cutlery flying around the table to disguise the flash of golden power which lit his eyes. The black centaur pranced nervously, his dark eyes fixed on Merlin's face. "You." Apparently it wasn't just wizards who listened to legends.
Merlin tried to keep his expression friendly, but he could feel his eyes narrowing. "I don't want to hurt you but I've got important things to do which I can't let you interfere with."
"Be that as it may, you are still human and humans have never been friends of the centaurs."
"Have you ever given them a chance? I would welcome your help, even just your friendship." Merlin offered. This hatred between races was something that was unfortunately still left over from Uther's rule, to some that memory of persecution could never be erased.
The black centaur flicked his tail and the others drew back. "You may pass though this forest unassailed by us, but do not consider that a friendship. I will not lose any of our kind to you Emrys nor to any other human." With a thunder of hooves the centaurs vanished into the trees.
Merlin leant against a nearby tree and sighed, so much for Albion and the unity of the magical races. Hunching his shoulders against his mood Merlin continued on his walk. He found several familiar glades, now populated by any number of magical creatures. However his day was made when he walked into a little clearing to find a unicorn waiting for him.
Stopping in his tracks and waiting Merlin watched the beautiful creature as it cropped grass quietly. He was glad the unicorn population had increased and that they were once again safe within the lands of Camelot, even if the kingdom didn't technically exist anymore.
Unwilling to disturb the wondrous creature Merlin turned and headed back out of the forest.
He found Grubby-Plank finishing up a lesson with a group of young students. Waiting politely in the background Merlin wondered what work there actually was for the groundskeeper. After all the forest seemed to run itself and there were no horses to look after. Maybe someone had to be in charge of feeding the Giant Squid. That thought made him shudder and Grubby-Plank hurried over to him. "Where have you been all morning?" She demanded.
Merlin shrugged. "I was looking about in the forest, getting my bearings."
"Well, I need you to head over to the pumpkin patch by the greenhouses and weed it, water the pumpkins and make sure none of Pomona's plants have escaped and have been eating the school vegetables." Grubby-Plank handed Merlin a large bucket, a spade and unnervingly a short staff with a hooked foot-long blade attached to one end. When he hesitated, arms overflowing she snapped at him sharply. "Are you thick boy, get a move on and next time you feel the need for a half days wander through the Forbidden Forest you can let me know first."
"Yes milady." Merlin replied on autopilot then ran for the pumpkin patch before the crotchety woman had the chance to fully ponder his use of a rather old and formal title.
The pumpkin patch was huge and contained more than just pumpkins. There was a vast array of vegetables growing, many out of season, across the near acre of carefully turned soil.
Merlin set his instruments on the ground and considered the best way to approach this. He could carry the bucket in one hand and the spade in the other and then leave the weapon-thingy here and come back if he needed it. Or he could carry the bucket and the weapon-thingy and go through the whole patch doing that... Merlin slapped himself on the forehead. Maybe he was an idiot.
One command later resulted in the scythe-like weapon and the bucket floating along peacefully behind him while he slowly picked his way along the rows of vegetables looking for weeds or vicious attack plants.
Half an hour and three lines later Merlin had shed his scarf and jacket and was heavily engaged in fierce battle with the long tendril arms of an extremely vicious blackberry bush. When he finally turned from the bush, now hacked into pieces, covered in scratches and feeling very pleased with himself he realised he had an audience.
Harry, Ron and Hermione were watching him from where his bucket and spade had landed when he had tossed them aside, moments after having his feet ripped out from under him by his now cowering opponent. "Hi Me...Emrys. How's it going?" Harry looked like he wasn't sure if he should be impressed, confused or frightened.
Levelling Harry a look for the near slip of the tongue Merlin sent the blackberry vines into the bucket with a flick of his wrist. "Well I've got to finish all this." He waved his arm expressively at the expanse of vegetable patch which was currently commanding his attention. "What about you?" He took in their irritable expressions. "I can see your day went well."
"Umbridge." Ron growled as he flopped onto the ground and kicked Merlin's spade sharply. "She's useless, she's not even going to let us use magic in class." The red head levelled a cold look Merlin's way, as though this was all his fault.
"She gave me a week's worth of detentions for telling everyone that Voldemort was back." Harry snapped and dropped down beside his friend.
Hermione grimaced. "You were rather...loud about it Harry." She offered looking sideways at Merlin. "He yelled at her."
"McGonagall didn't even do anything about it." Harry muttered.
Strolling a few more metres down the row he was working on Merlin bent to pull up a weed. The three students had risen and followed him. "Sounds like she's out to get you, big surprise there. Harry you knew that she wanted to persecute you. Trust me shouting at her isn't going to help. People like Dolores Umbridge will do anything to get their way, she's going to persecute you and the best way to prevent her from doing that is to stay out of her hair and be the most perfect student she could imagine. Don't give her anything to work with."
Harry glared. "So basically control my temper." Merlin stopped what he was doing to look over his shoulder at his friend. Harry's face looked like a thundercloud. "I'm sick to death of hearing people tell me to control my temper." He roared and stormed off back towards the castle.
"I'm so sorry Emrys, he's to touchy these days." Hermione explained.
Merlin waved a hand in a gesture of understanding and to summon the bucket so he could dump his collection of weeds. "I get it. Look Harry's under a lot of pressure, Voldemort has returned and is out for his blood and to cap it off every second person he runs into is either convinced he's insane or is actively trying to harm him. It's not easy living with that sort of thing over your head believe me." Bending to pick up his spade Merlin looked up at the confused expressions on Hermione and Ron's faces. "Look, Voldemort won't be able to stay hidden forever. Soon enough people will begin to realise that the Ministry is wrong and when that happens, well thing are going to get messy. Harry will need you then, but he needs you even more now. He needs support from people he can trust."
"What about you?" Ron asked. "Can't you do something about Umbridge?"
Sighing Merlin shook his head. "I'd love to and were it another time I would, but..." He stopped at the desperate looks on Ron and Hermione's faces. "Alright, look I'll talk to Dumbledore and if there's nothing he can do...well we'll see if I've lost my touch."
Hermione beamed. "Thanks Mer...Emrys. We'll come down and see you again later."
"Good, because Grubby-Plank should change her name to Grumpy-Plank." Merlin laughed as the two followed their friend back up to the castle. His smile faded as they drew out of sight. Umbridge was a problem, but she was going to be more of a problem for Harry if the boy's temper wouldn't stay under control.
Not that temper control was one of Merlin's specialities, he had yelled at Gaius more than once and he'd definitely gotten cross at Arthur frequently, though the most he'd ever taken out on the King had been to call him a clodpole.
Chuckling afresh at the good memories Merlin turned his attention back to the garden patch. It was going to take him the rest of the day to get this all sorted, but he didn't mind. It was nice to be home.
I do believe that clodpole may be my favourite insult of all time.
