The Bone Artist

Chapter Eleven

ELM377 & Interest Me

Fischer stood in the smoldering ruins of the yoga center. Cinereal ash dusted every surface and the air was pungent. Smoke stung his nostrils.

"I can only stand and philosophize the karmic balance that has reduced this lying, murderous philanderer to the very fate he bestowed upon others."

Fischer contemplated the position of Jameson before him. Sitting, pink and black flesh contracted into the lotus position, teeth bared. A gold wedding band glinted through the soot.

"Yeah man, pretty apt huh?" replied Hodgins scraping larvae off glistening bone.

"Confucius said 'Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.' "

"Dude, that is pretty philosophical."

"I just find the symbiosis of this crime very comforting, a full circle."

"Kind of like what goes around, comes around right?"

"Exactly, my friend. I think I am going to be very cautious around Valerie in the future. She still has the pear you know?"

"Booth why is he green?" whispered Brennan, sneaking a hand into his popcorn.

"He just is Bones. He is unknown species."

"That's stupid – and look at his ears, and the way he speaks makes absolutely no sense whatsoever."

"Hang on, let me just call George Lucas. I'll ask him for you."

"There is no need to be snippy with me. I am asking rational questions. And who is George Lucas?"

"This is not a time to be rational – this is a film about an ancient galaxy, huge spaceships and men who fight with long beams of light Bones. Just enjoy it for what it is."

"Well you know what those long beams of light signify don't you? The egocentric male representation of a large p-"

"Shhhhhhhhhhh", Booth stuffed popcorn into her mouth.

"Dude you know she;s right – the size of the light sabre would be considered to be a symbol of male virility." Noel paused to stare at Brennan. "I myself am very virile."

"She doesn't care and you are spending way too much time at my place. I think it's time for you to spread your wings and fly. Our apprenticeship is ending."

"Noel isn't our apprentice Booth."

DING!

"But the brownies are ready dude."

"I'll get them," Stephanie jumped up.

"Oh good," Brennan said.

Booth shot her a look.

"What Booth, he makes excellent brownies."

"Yes Bones, in a way he is our apprentice. And its time he graduated now. I think he is ready don't you?"

There was silent communication between the partners.

"Young Padwan, go make your way in the big wide world and take Princess Leia with you."

"Alright but let me watch the end of the movie first."

The four settled back to eat brownies and be interrupted by Brennan every few minutes, as she injected logic where it seemed to be missing.

"Princess Leia, that is kinda funny. You can be my Luke Skywalker." said Stephanie, curling up next to Noel.

"Uh No Stephanie, don't you mean Han Solo? Believe me; I do not have any brotherly feelings towards you."

"Oh yeah, that's right, silly me."

"Booth who is Han Solo?"

"Bones, Harrison Ford - you know Indiana Jones?"

"Indiana Jones is in this movie?"

"No, but the actor who plays Indiana Jones is the actor playing Han Solo. How do you know who Indiana Jones is anyway?"

"Booth, everybody knows who Indiana Jones is."

"Right Bones. Are you sure it's not just because you have a thing for action men carrying whips?"

"Half this movie could be deleted with a DNA test."

"Bones!"

"Well Booth. The term Science Fiction is oxymoronic!"

"They didn't have DNA tests in ancient galaxies, far away" Booth said.

"That seems unlikely."

"Yeah, especially considering the Clone Wars that happened before this," Noel added helpfully.

"Oh yeah! That's right! And I know that in one of the books, they used Luke's severed hand to make an evil Luke. I wonder why they just didn't do DNA tests." Stephanie added.

Booth stared at the television and breathed in, and breathed out, and went to his comforting place where he could shoot all the annoying people. Next time he'd let her pick the movie.

The End!