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Chapter Eleven

He paced in front of her like a caged animal, eyes narrowed, mouth set in a thin angry line, arms swinging like they always did when he was this upset. She waited next to Rick, giving him time to collect his thoughts as she watched his feral movements with childlike wonder. It was one of her most guarded secrets. She was completely fascinated with this side of him and had been ever since the farm. The night she had come to him after Sophia had been found he had acted similar to this. That night she had been sure he would hit her. When he didn't she had puzzled over the reasons why. She understood now, of course, that he just wasn't the type of man to do that, no matter how angry he was, and that was where it got... odd. There was so much potential for violence that it made him dangerous, but she was so very certain that he was harmless, even in this state, that she could appreciate the beauty of this side of him. He had grown into a different person from those days. That was clear. But deep down, at his core, Daryl would always be more in tune with that primal side of himself than anyone else she had ever encountered. She hated to admit it, even to herself, but she couldn't help but wonder what other situations may bring out that beast that seemed to slumber inside of him. If he ever did break through those chains that held him back from intimate situations, would this be what was hiding under the shy uncertainty? She shivered visibly at the thought.

"Daryl, listen," Rick began but Daryl wasn't about to hear anything else Rick had to say at the moment.

"No, you listen. She ain't goin'," he barked, stopping in front of Rick and glaring angrily, chest heaving.

Carol felt her eyes widen. She watched a bead of sweat slip down his jaw, over his throat and then disappear down the open collar of his shirt. He licked his lips and then his eyes cut to her, angry, unforgiving, all consuming. She swallowed hard and forced herself to stop staring at his mouth. She cleared her throat before speaking. "Daryl, it's not far. You took me further last night."

He shook his head. "I ain't never left with you and not brought you back either. No!" He took a step towards Rick and jabbed an angry finger in his direction. "You ain't takin' her. I put up with a lot of your shit, Rick, but I ain't riskin' it."

Rick glared. "You don't have any claim on her, Daryl. She wants to go and she has free will to do so. You're not her keeper and neither am I. She's a grown woman."

"If she leaves with you then she's a goddamn grown idiot," he yelled.

"Can I talk to you alone?" She asked suddenly, trying to put enough force into her voice to be heard over the two men.

Rick looked from Daryl to her, made a face and then nodded. "Yeah. But don't let him talk you out of going."

Daryl surprised her further by flipping Rick off before she had him by the arm, leading him to the barn. It was strange since she hadn't seen him and Rick act like this since the quarry. They were usually very much in sync with one another. Glenn's words came back to her but she pushed them to the back of her mind. Refusing, not for the first time, to believe that she was somehow the cause of this. Rick didn't truly have feelings for her. What she felt for Daryl was real and deep but would never morph into anything like a relationship and as for Daryl, she knew that he loved her but it was a very platonic love and would never go anywhere. Their bickering was just an aftermath of the stress they had all been under. All of them were stretched tight and about to snap.

"Daryl, what are you doing?" She asked once they were behind the barn. She crossed her arms over her chest and gave him a look that she hoped would let him know how ridiculous she thought he was acting.

"I'm tryin' to save your ass. What happened the last time you took off with Rick without me?" He snapped, proceeding to pace.

She refused to let her mind wonder this time. "You know as well as I do that he feels bad about what he did. He won't leave me out there. We're not even walking out a mile. If he tries to leave me I'll just walk back here and tell you all about it and then you can scream at him. And flip him the bird. What is this really about?"

He stopped pacing and glared at her. Her hands went to her hips and she glared right back.

"Don't you think you can bully me, Daryl Dixon. Answer the question."

He snorted and threw up his hands. "You know what this is about, don't you? You can't be that stupid!"

"Well, apparently I am that stupid because I don't see the danger of going out there with him. I don't need protected, Daryl. I can take care of myself."

"It ain't about that. He wants to..." He cut off his words and made a frustrated sound in the back of his throat, avoiding her eyes.

"He wants to what?" She asked, growing more angry by the second.

He stopped and stared at her, really stared. He eyed her from head to toe and seemed to have no shame in doing so. "He's got this stupid idea in his head that the two of you should..." He voice trailed off and he grimaced.

"Spit it out!"

"He wants to be with you, stupid! I don't know if it's cause of the guilt over what he did to you or if he's bought himself another one way ticket on the damn crazy train, but that's why he wants you to go with him. That's why he's been followin' you around like some kind of lost puppy and that's why you shouldn't go anywhere with him." He took in a gulp of much needed air, since he had delivered all of that with a single breath.

Now she was the one glaring, her arms crossed over her chest in a subconscious effort to protect herself from the blow of his words. She didn't let it hurt for very long. She swallowed it down and met his stare. She was proud that he actually seemed to lose a bit of steam. He stilled his pacing, his eyes going from furious to confused. She shook her head. "So, the only reason someone would want to be with me is because they either felt like they owed it to me or because they were actually insane?" Her voice was like ice, even to her own ears, freezing the air around him.

He scowled. "What? No! Don't turn my words around like that."

"I didn't have to turn them around. Your delivery was pretty straight."

He gaped at her. "Oh, for fuck's sake, Carol!"

"We're done here. I'll see you when we get back." She turned on her heel and was about to stalk away but he grabbed her arm, his grip firm.

"The hell we are."

"You ready?" Rick asked, coming around the side of the barn. Daryl dropped his hand from her arm and she didn't turn to look at Daryl as she stormed past Rick. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction of the tears that had suddenly sprung to her eyes. It was probably just allergies but she didn't want him to get the wrong idea.

She adjusted her rifle once they were on the road. Rick kept casting sideways glances at her but he didn't say anything for a while. She was actually the one that broke the silence. "If we see any vehicles?" She asked tightly.

"We hit the ditch and head for the trees. I'm not taking any chances," He said without hesitation.

She nodded in agreement.

"You wanna talk about it?" He asked.

She shook her head, keeping her chin up. She wasn't about to get into this conversation with him. Not after the fight that the two of them had already had this morning. It was better to just bury it.

"He cares about you, ya know?" Rick said. Now he was hesitant, like he was going to regret his next words. "He just don't know how to handle that. He's kind of inexperienced when it comes to caring about somebody the way he does you. He's gonna mess up."

Hearing him defend Daryl just confirmed that Daryl's fears of Rick wanting to whisk her off and have his way with her were unfounded. "I'm not an idiot, Rick. I know he cares about me. Let's just agree that he's a tactless jackass and leave it at that."

Rick chuckled. "Gladly."

Silence reigned for a while after that and it was her that broke that silence again when she noticed a flash of color a little ways off the road through the trees. She grabbed Rick's arm and pointed. He squinted in the direction and then glanced at her. She shrugged. "Looks like a truck."

He nodded and grabbed her hand, leading her towards the trees. Once they got closer they could tell that it was a pick up truck covered in kudzu vines.

"It's been here a while but it's worth checkin' out," he muttered.

They worked on ridding the vines that had hidden the truck in the first place. Carol was relieved to see the cab empty and the door ajar. Whoever had ran the truck off the road had at least managed to get out. She was getting tired of dealing with bodies all the time. She looked up as Rick pulled the driver's side door open. She rummaged through the glove compartment but there was nothing there that was useful other than a flashlight and a few unopened packages of batteries. She shoved these into her bag and then stepped back.

She moved to the bed of the truck but other than a few rusted tools, it also proved to be empty. There was one of those large metal tool boxes that was now rusting away to nothing. Rick opened it up on his side and reached in. He pulled out, what looked like, an old tape player.

"Haven't seen one of those in a while," she said, glancing around to make sure the coast was still clear.

He held it by the handle and smiled. "You and me both." He went back to the cab for a few seconds and then came around, shoving something into his pack.

"What was that?" She asked, quirking a brow at him.

He shrugged. "Tapes. Maybe some music will do us some good."

She shook her head smiling indulgently even though she didn't really feel like smiling at all. "There's enough room in my pack for this," she said as she took the little stereo from him. She stuck it inside with the flashlight and the batteries and zipped up. "You think we've walked far enough?"

He squinted as he looked towards the direction they had been heading. "I was planning on walking farther but it all seems quiet. We can head back."

"That makes you nervous, doesn't it? The quiet."

He fell in step beside her, their arms barely brushing as they walked. "It does. It seems like that's when all hell seems to break loose. We've been lucky for the last few days and I keep wondering when that luck is finally gonna give."

There really wasn't any way to respond to that so she stayed quiet. The rest of the walk was like that. There was nothing but the sounds of the their feet hitting the pavement and the occasional bird singing in the trees. She almost wished he would start talking again because in the silence all she could think about were Daryl's words.