Chapter 11
"No. No, Rose, I - I can't. That's, like, textbook stalker chick right there. Look up your old boyfriends online."
"Considering he's your baby's daddy, I'd say it's not stalker chick at all. Maybe a bit desperate, but not stalker. And I thought he wasn't your boyfriend? Just someone you shook the sheets with."
"Well, back in tenth grade, we did kinda date for a little while. A very short little while. Then our one friend, who was jealous of us to begin with, convinced him that I was only going out with him because he saved my life and I had some kind of silly hero worship crush on him. So he ended it. But promised each other we'd try again some time and we never really have. The thing is, I always regretted us breaking up, an - and I think he did, too. At least I hope he did."
"And then of course there's the part where you let him screw your brains out before you left the states. You conveniently left that part out, sweetie."
"It wasn't like that! There was no brain screwing. We just . . . " Carly was embarrassed and said the next part quietly. "We just lost our innocence to each other the day I left."
"Ohhh myyy Gawwwd!" Rose exclaimed sounding like an eighties valley girl with a British accent. You mean he was your first, and you got preggers the first time you even did it? Damn, now you seriously have to find him. I mean, holy shit, Carly, that's either the most pathetic thing I've ever heard in my life or the most romantic. I don't know which."
"But I doubt he's even online or anything. He always used to say how he didn't like post chiz about his life online. He'd only ever put stuff on the iCarly page because I asked him to. And I'm sure he's too busy with school to even worry about something stupid like Splashface. He's super smart, he got into MIT on a scholarship and everything. Did I tell you that?"
"I believe you may have mentioned it." Rose rolled her eyes. "Well then, I guess the only thing you have to lose in trying is a little time if he's not there."
Carly huffed and made no move toward the computer. "It's pointless. Even if I did manage to find him there's no way we'd be able to reconnect. I'm sure he's in grad school by now, I live in Europe for Pete's sake." She threw her hands up in the air in frustration. "It's not like either of us is going to move across the Atlantic to be with the other. It's just - it's a complete was of time. And I just know my dad would skin me if I actually made contact with him!"
"Alright, first off your dad can suck it. You're a grown woman and you can do whatever you like. Second, there's no harm in finding out what he's been up to. It's not like you even expect to find him anyway, you said so yourself. Just do a search and prove it. You owe it to yourself and to little Freddie. C'mon, Carly-girl, you know you're dying to know if he's really out there and waiting for the love of his life to return."
"Psh! Love of his life. That's a laugh. Like he'd even remember me. I'm sure he's moved on by now, probably hooked up with some NASA scientist or master computer hacker girl he met at college or something." Carly just rolled her eyes. "Remind me again how this went from a conversation about Jeremy getting fired to me looking up my old friends online."
"Fine. I'll look him up if you're too scared to do it. What's his last name, Freddie what?" The redhead was determined and Carly knew she wasn't going to win this one. Why did she always pick such headstrong friends.
"Benson. His name is Fredward Karl Benson, but this is silly." Carly continued to protest, crossing her arms. "There's no way you can just type a few keys and find out all about someone there is to know. I mean, I told you he's not the kind of person to post his life online. Unless you're some kind of super spy or the world's best detective, you'll never find him. I doubt if you'll even find his phone number."
"Bingo!" Rose exclaimed after less than ten seconds. "Here he is. At least I think this is the guy. Ooh, here's his profile picture. Shit girl, he is a hottie. I can see why you shagged him."
Carly just rolled her eyes at her friend's crude expression. "There was no shagging. Wait, what's shagging mean again?"
"Freddie Benson, originally from Seattle, Washington, graduated from Ridgeway High four years ago. That's your class I believe." Rose lifted an eyebrow.
Carly nodded, she couldn't believe her friend actually was onto something.
"Right then, recent graduate of MIT, mother is one Marissa Benson. He enjoys fencing, computers, building model trains and Galaxy Wars. Friends online with another MIT guy named Allen Thompkins, a girl called Amanda Benson, must be a sister or something."
"Cousin." Carly corrected, remembering Freddie's weird relatives. "Amanda's his oddball cousin. What a spazz."
The girl continued reading. "Right, best friend is one Orenthal Reginald 'Gibby' Gibson, God what a name. What the hell kind of drugs was that dude's mother on? Engaged to Sam Puck . . . " Rose fell silent a few words too late.
"What?!" Carly did a spit take and ended up coughing and sputtering kookey kola all over Rose's kitchen table.
"Uh, you know I don't think this is him after all, better keep looking." Rose typed furiously at her keyboard, pretending to search elsewhere for anyone else that may have been Carly's Freddie. Of course, she knew this was the guy, but the last fact she mentioned was something she figured Carly definitely didn't want to hear.
"Wait. Go back a bit." Carly tried to grab at the computer but the English girl held fast. "That was him, I'm sure of it."
"Oh so now you're suddenly interested in looking him up. Let's make up our mind, shall we." Rose scolded.
"Pull up that other page." Carly demanded. "Rosie, that was him! I'm sure of it."
Her friend reluctantly scrolled back and opened Freddie's Splashface page. There it was, big and bold on the screen in front of them, complete with a picture of Sam and Freddie together showing off her engagement ring. And then there was that picture of them snuggling under the covers. Poor Carly's face flushed. Though she'd never admit it to her friend, for over three years she had been hoping to be able to reconnect with Freddie. To find a way to tell him he was a father, to see if they could make a go of being a couple so her son could have a father and they could all live happily ever after. Her hopes were dashed in less than two minutes flat.
"Sorry." Rose put her hand on Carly's shoulder. "This is all my fault. I shouldn't have pushed you to look."
"No. No, it's fine. It was stupid of me to think that he'd be waiting for me. After all, him and Sam were so desperate for each other it was damn near pathetic. I just figured neither of them would ever have the stones to tell the other one how they truly felt." Carly jumped at the sound of little Freddie starting to fuss from the playpen he and Rose's son were napping in. "You know, if this is anybody's fault, it's my dad's. He's the one that convinced me that I should cut Freddie out of my life. I guess dad can be really happy because Freddie's never going to be with me, it's too late now. He's marring my best friend from high school."
"True. But you know, he'd still be engaged even if you hadn't seen it. So what's worse finding out now or after you've sat around and waited for him. Oh, right, sorry. That's what you have been doing." Rose said with a snarky heir.
Carly shot the English girl a stink eye and picked up her son. "Yep. Bu - but you know what. My dad is right, I'm doing just fine without him." She picked up her things and began to head for the door. "So I'll see you tomorrow morning for the bake sale, bright and early, then."
Rose nodded, she knew her friend was hurting. "Right. See you tomorrow, Carly. Call me if you need to talk."
"Psh! I'm fine!" Carly replied.
She kept a stiff upper lip as she walked to her car but by the time she had buckled her son into his seat and made her way around to the driver's door, she was in tears. She plopped herself onto the seat and rested her head on the steering wheel as the deep sobs came. "Oh, Freddie. If you only knew how much I want you to be here. I just wish you could know what you've done."
"Mama!" Little Freddie called from the back seat. "Donn Cwyy."
Poor Carly!
