Chapter 11: What the fuck is going on?
I'm writing this shortly after posting the last chapter so I still don't have much to say.
Although somebody did comment on the fact that Ichigo called the captains fodder, let me explain that. When he said they were fodder he wasn't calling them weak, it's just that they weren't what he was expecting, when he saw Urahara, who's an ex-captain, he knew he was extremely powerful, so when he was faced with the captains who, let's admit it, aren't all that for being the strongest fighters in Soul Society, he was simply underwhelmed.
Anyways, that's all I have to say so,
LEGO!
"Talking"
'Thinking'
"Demon/Hollow talking"
'Demon/Hollow thinking'
"Spirit Talking"
'Spirit thinking'
Disclaimer: Don't own Bleach.
Chapter 11: What the fuck is going on?
Ichigo woke up after a surprisingly good night's sleep, feeling a small weight on his stomach, he looked up and saw the cat he had seen the night when he had met Rukia and gone to Urahara's shop for the first time, 'Heh, I guess Urahara acts fast.' he thought, "May I ask what you're doing on my stomach?" he asked.
The cat seemed perplexed to be expected to talk, although it's expression soon changed to mirth, "You know what I'm doing here if you are expecting me to talk." it said, it's voice masculine.
Ichigo raised an eyebrow, "So Urahara sent a gender-confused talking cat to help me?" he questioned.
The cat seemed outraged, angry and surprised at that, "What? Gender-confused? What are you talking about? And I'll have you know I'm not just some talking cat!" it exclaimed.
Ichigo smirked, "Well, your voice is male but I can tell from your spiritual energy that you're a woman, and a human one at that, with a very... voluptuous, figure. So technically I have a hot girl laying on me right now." he said, laughing when the cat tried to scratch him.
"And here I thought I'd be able to tease you and surprise you with my human form. How can you even tell all that?" the cat asked.
"When I focus on your spiritual energy, I can see the actual outline of your body, and it's not one of a cat." he explained.
The cat raised an eyebrow, "Really? I've never heard of that."
Ichigo shrugged, "I don't know, don't care. Now could you get off me, and explain to me what you're here for. And what your name is." the cat hopped off him.
"My name's Yoruichi Shihoin, and I'm simply here to help train you until Urahara can get your three friends ready to invade Soul Society." Yoruichi explained casually.
Ichigo stopped as he reached for his new uniform, "Get my three friends ready for what?" he asked.
"You don't know? Oh right, you were taken to Soul Society before you learned. Your friends, Orihime, Chad and Tatsuki, awakened powers while you and Ishida were busy doing your stupid competition." she explained.
"Okay, first of all, I didn't want to participate in that, and second of all" he took a deep breath, "why the fuck is Urahara's plan to send three kids who just awakened their powers to Soul Society, what does that even have to do with Aizen?" he asked.
"Aha! Good question, to be honest, I don't know." the cat said sheepishly.
Ichigo made a deadpan face, "Do you actually not know, or has Urahara told you not to tell me?"
"I really don't know, when I tried to question him on why he was doing it, he said it would be 'something Aizen wouldn't expect.'." she explained, "And he's not going to train them for a couple hours and send them off, you should at least count a month or two before he sends them here, so they will be ready, and so will you."
Ichigo facepalmed, "'Something Aizen wouldn't expect.' Yeah, cause it's so stupid he wouldn't even think that was an option. Ughh, what did I do to deserve having to deal with an idiot like that." he muttered.
"You're complaining, I've had to deal with him for a couple centuries now." Yoruichi said.
"I pity you." Ichigo said as he undressed himself to put on his uniform.
"Hey! What are you doing? I'm right here!" she yelled.
"What are you complaining about? You're just a cat. Besides, are you really complaining?" he asked with a smirk as he turned towards her, torso fully exposed.
'He does look nice...' she thought, internally licking her lips, "You do realize that if I am really, 'just a cat' you just tried to flirt with an animal, right?" she pointed out.
"Point." he agreed, putting his uniform on, "Isn't Aizen going to realize you're here though? He seems pretty aware of what's going on at all times." he questioned.
"No, he won't. There are a lot of things I can't be sure of when talking about Aizen, but I can guarantee you he doesn't know I'm here. Besides, I'm going to be spending most of my time in the area where we're going to be training, that nobody knows about." she explained.
"And what are you gonna be doing there?" Ichigo asked.
"I'm gonna train, or at least, get myself back in form, it's been 100 years since I've stretched my beautiful body." she said, "After today's classes you should have free roam to do whatever you want, so come back to your dorm and we'll go train."
Ichigo smirked, at least the person he would be stuck with for 2 months seemed fun, "Gotcha." he said as Yoruichi flashed stepped away, 'Huh, she's fast.' he thought, checking his schedule, 'Oh boy, history class, it's like school never ended.' he thought sadly. Making his way towards his classroom, although he stopped when he saw his father turning around the corner, 'Oh, almost forgot about him.' he thought, "What's up?" he asked casually.
Isshin stopped, taking a second to analyze his son a bit more, since the shock of seeing him for the first time had worn off. If he didn't know any better, he would have thought it was Kaien with orange hair, and a colder demeanour, it was obvious he was more of the cold calculating type, "Listen Ichigo, I don't know how you feel towards me, I know I don't deserve anything as your father, but I would like to at least try, as would the rest of our family. So I'm asking if you would like to have dinner with us tonight, there would be my wife, your cousins and your sisters." Isshin asked.
"Wait, you have a wife? Did you have ever when you met Masaki?" Ichigo asked.
Isshin widened his eyes comically, blubbering and waving his hands around, "Of course not! I hadn't met her yet! Don't even mention the possibility of that, she would beat my ass." Isshin said.
Ichigo chuckled, "Whatever, I don't care. I'm not going either." he said as he started walking again.
Isshin, surprised, took a second before turning around and grabbing his son's shoulder, "What are you talking about? Don't you want to meet your family?" he asked.
Ichigo turned around and sighed, "Listen, I don't really believe in the whole concept of 'family', to me, you guys are like strangers I would meet on the street, I don't care about you guys. Same goes with you, you might be my father by blood, but to me that means nothing, you're just another random person in this world. I hold no ill will, or any good wishes, towards you. So I would rather not meet them." he explaining, before walking off again.
"Wait!" Isshin exclaimed, Ichigo stopped, although he didn't turn around, "I understand where you're coming from, but please, I'm not asking you to do this for my sake, I'm asking for my daughters sake." he pleaded.
Ichigo turned around, arms crossed, "And what could I do for your daughters?" he asked.
"Has anybody told you of Shiba Kaien?" he asked, Ichigo nodded, "He was like a big brother to them, and ever since he died I feel like they've been lost, and I can't do anything about it." he said sadly, looking down, "However you, you feel just like him, you exude that same aura. I'm asking you as a father, powerless to help his daughters during their struggles, I'm asking you to at least try." he almost begged.
Ichigo grit his teeth, he didn't like simply being seen as a replacement for somebody else, "Jesus Christ you're pathetic." Isshin didn't argue that, "Whatever, I'll help you, but I reserve the right to leave whenever I want." he said.
"Thank you." Isshin whispered, although Ichigo heard it.
"Yeah whatever, don't thank me, I don't like it. Anyways, isn't there something else you want to ask me?" he questioned.
"Yes, what happened to your mother?" Isshin asked.
"I'm not going to tell you the full story, simply because you don't need to hear it, but simply put, she lost her quincy powers and wasn't able to fight off the hollow. I got baited into a trap and she saved me." Ichigo explained.
"Why did she lose her powers?" he asked.
Ichigo sighed desperately, "Didn't I tell you? I'm not going to explain the full story, and that's part of it." he said, "And yes, before you even ask, I did get her quincy powers, and can use them."
Isshin's eyes widened, he hadn't thought of that, "Then... you must be extremely powerful. I could tell from your spiritual energy that you were." Isshin's eyes darkened as he kept thinking, "There's a lot you're hiding from us, isn't there?" he said firmly, and instantly, he was behind Ichigo, his hand on his sword's hilt, "If you're not going to see me as your father, I'll do the same towards you. So let me tell you, if you try anything that could even remotely go against Soul Society, I'll kill you." he said, pressing his reiatsu.
Ichigo turned around, his face still uncaring, "Will you stop already? I'm not here to destroy the Soul Society or anything." he told Isshin casually as he starting walking off, "If anything, I'm here to save it." he said before turning the corner, leaving Isshin alone.
'To save it? What could you possibly mean?' Isshin thought, his mind heavy with all the things he had to think over from the conversation with his 'son'.
Ichigo made it to his class swiftly after that, although he was still a bit late. He knocked on the door to the classroom, opening it after he heard an 'enter', "Sorry for being late, I was held up a bit." he said to his teacher, who he recognized as the woman at his test.
"It's fine, ahh, apologies, how would you like to be addressed?" she asked.
"I'd rather you called me Kurosaki." he said.
"I see, things not going smoothly with your new family?" she questioned, her curiosity getting the better of her, Ichigo simply stared at her with a deadpan face, "Sorry," she said sheepishly, "that's none of my business." she turned towards the class, who were looking at the interaction, confused, "Class, please welcome a new student, normally such a thing wouldn't happen, but an exception was made. Although you might have heard of him from rumors, you are to treat him as you would any other classmate." she said sternly, "If you would introduce yourself."
'Oh how I hate these stupid introductions.' Ichigo mused, "Name's Kurosaki-Shiba Ichigo. That's all." he said blankly, going for a free seat.
Whispers started going around when he said his name, obviously the students had heard of the captain who had an affair with a human, Ichigo ignored them, this wasn't what he was here for, besides, he had a feeling, and a hope, that he wouldn't actually stay in the academy for too long.
The class went by slowly, with Ichigo mainly gazing into nothing, since he already had been told most of this by Urahara, he was the first out of the class, not wanting to socialize.
He spent most of the day like that, and very fast, it was time to go back to his dorm to be meet Yoruichi.
He opened the door, where she was on his bed, licking her paws. She looked up, "Ah, you're here." she said as she stood up, "From what Urahara told me you're pretty fast, think you can make it through Seireitei without being spotted?" she said mischievously.
Ichigo smirked, "Please, give me a challenge." the cat laughed.
"Good, I like you. Follow me." she said as she disappeared with flash step, Ichigo following.
"Wow, that was easy, these guys really need to step their security up." Ichigo said as he landed on the ledge of the 'training layer'.
"Agreed."
"So where's this training layer?" Ichigo asked.
The cat walked up to what looked like a latch and pulled it up, revealing a ladder, "Right down here." she said as she jumped, Ichigo following.
They landed at the same time, with Ichigo looking around, "Huh, either you guys are really discreet and managed to clear this out without anybody noticing, or either there's some really cool space magic I don't know about." Ichigo mused.
"Yeah, I still don't know how Urahara made this." she said.
"So, are you finally going to show me what you look like? I doubt a cat can train me." he asked.
She seemed a bit frustrated by that comment, "I could train you while staying in my cat form if I wanted to, the only reason I'm not is because I need to stretch, and also the training we're going to do requires it." she said as she disappeared in a puff of pink smoke.
Ichigo looked at what came out of the smoke with raised eyebrows, and whistled, "10/10, if I do say so myself." he said as he looked at the, for lack of a better word, goddess, that had came out of the smoke, "And naked too, I can appreciate that." he continued.
"Good reaction, I was sort of hoping you would start blubbering and blushing but I figured that wouldn't happen." she told him.
Ichigo smirked, "Come on, do I look like a boy to you?"
She smirked back at him, crossing the short distance between them, her hips swaying, "Of course you don't." she said in a sultry voice, tracing her finger down his chest, all the way to his lower stomach, "It's good too," she whispered in his ear, "I was looking for a man to have fun with." she teased.
'I can't tell whether she's really slutty or just a tease, whatever, not like I care.' Ichigo thought as he placed his hand on her waist, "Oh, and what kind of fun were you thinking about?" he whispered back.
Yoruichi was trying really hard not to laugh, and it was visible on her face, finally, she lost it, and burst out laughing, "I like you, when Urahara told me I'd have to come back to Soul Society to train some 18 year old human with special powers I thought it'd be stuck with some blubbering virgin, but you're pretty fun." she said, recomposing herself.
"Technically I still am a virgin." he clarified with a smirk, "And you're bipolar."
She shrugged, making her breasts bounce a bit, something Ichigo tried hard to ignore, and failed at. Yoruichi spotted that, and smirked, "What you looking at?"
"Your tits, you mind?" he said with a straight face.
"Nah, not really, although I think it's about time we got to training." She said.
"Oh yeah, that is what we are here for, so tell me, what is this training that required you go back to your human body. Sex?" he asked.
"Maybe another day." she said with a sly smirk.
'Maybe another day.' Ichigo thought back in his mind, this time in a dreamy tone, 'Hey, I might have acted all cool and stuff, but she's hot, and I'm only 18.' Ichigo clarified to nobody in particular.
"But no, I'm going to be teaching you Hoho and Hakuda, since they're my specialty." she told him.
"Sounds good, although I would like it if you would put some clothes." he said, to which Yoruichi's whole demeanor deflated, and she placed her hands of her hips.
"Really? What happened to the whole 'I'm not a boy' thing?" she asked and, before she knew it, Ichigo was back in front of her, pressing against her, a hand on her waist, letting her feel Ichigo's 'little man' who wasn't feeling all that little.
"Oh, nothing happened to that." he whispered in her ear, his tone this time actually holding lust in it, "It's just that seeing you like that right now is making me want to," 'Bend you over and fuck you into a coma. No, that sounds creepy.' "hmm, what's a way to say it, take you." 'That sounds really old styled, but to hell with it.'
Yoruichi froze for a second at that, she couldn't lie that the idea sounded tempting, and that she had been a little- a lot, turned on by it, as she disappeared.
'I can't believe he got me!' she scolded herself, 'What's up with him, normally I would laugh at somebody saying that. Although he's not just anybody, he feels like an alpha, he probably has that effect on everybody. Whatever, point is, it won't happen again and,' she smirked to herself as she put on her clothes, 'I'm going to have a lot of fun with him.'
"Ichigo! My boy! I'm so proud of you!" Shiro said in his mind, fake sniffling and wiping a tear from his eye, "I never thought you had it in you to that! 10/10 I say! 10/10!" the spirit cried.
Ichigo just shook his head with a smirk at his spirit, although he couldn't help but feel a bit proud.
Yoruichi soon came back, fully clothed, "Not. A. Word." she said dangerously, "You won this one." Ichigo simply put his hands up.
"I hear ya loud and clear, and I can't wait to see who wins next time." he told her with a smirk, that she gave back as well.
"Hah," she huffed, "I almost pity you."
"What's there to pity? I'm getting into a 'who can be more sexual and embarrass the other more' contest with you. All I see in my future is good." he said.
"Point. Although you're soon going to learn not everything in your future is good, when I whoop your ass like the good teacher I am." she said as she got in a battle ready stance, with Ichigo following suit.
"I still don't see anything wrong with that, I'll take the pain if it means I'll get straddled by you in the end." he said smugly.
She smirked, lunging towards him and throwing a right hook that he barely had time to avoid, 'She's pretty fast.' Ichigo thought as he leaned back, avoiding the fist, although he was caught off guard by the leg sweep.
"And I can't wait to sit on you." she said with a smug tone in return, her arm pressed against his neck and their faces almost touching as Ichigo was laid flat on the floor, with Yoruichi straddling him, "Yield?" she asked, her breath hitting Ichigo's face.
"Yield." he replied. She took her arm off his neck, sitting back up, although she was still sat on Ichigo, with her hands on his chest, "See, and I didn't even need to feel that much pain." he said with a smirk.
"Maybe, but that was way too easy, I'll really have to whoop you into shape if you're that weak." she told him as she got up.
"Please, I was just testing the waters, this time I'll actually be serious." he said as he got up as well.
A couple hours of flirtatious fighting later...
They trained like that for a couple hours, with Ichigo proving that he was indeed pretty strong, as he could somewhat keep up with his teacher, although she was still better than him. They were now in the hot spring that the layer housed after their training session.
"Right there Ichigo! Oh yes, that's the spot! Ooooh you're so good..." Yoruichi moaned as she was straddled by Ichigo, the side of her face on the floor and a smile on her face.
Ichigo simply had a deadpan expression on his face as he kept giving Yoruichi the massage she had asked for, "Are you trying to turn me on on purpose?" he said.
"Why of course I am," she said as she turned her head around, "And from what your little friend is telling me, it's working." she said as she wiggled her hips, making Ichigo hold in a moan.
"Please, I'm straddling you and giving you a massage while we're both naked in what is basically a hot tub. We're basically having sex. If I wasn't already turned on I'd be questioning if I was gay or not." he said, "And I'll let you know I'm having a really hard time not giving in to what Shiro is telling me to do and simply fuck you stupid." he continued, still surprised that he could have this kind of conversation with anybody. But he had learned that that was simply the type of person Yoruichi was, you could tell her you wanted to fuck her into a coma to her face and she would simply laugh it off and hit you with a comeback, unless you were some random person in the street, or Urahara.
"Aha, I'm afraid that won't happen today, although I really am tempted to take you up on that." she replied.
It was at that point Ichigo decided to really think about what was happening, 'Guys, can we all agree this doesn't make any sense?' he thought.
"Yeah, this really is incredible, you're one lucky motherfucker Ichigo, although I'm not complaining, I'm enjoying this as much as you are." Ossan said.
'No, like actually, I just met this chick at the start of the day, and now this is happening, my virgin brain can't comprehend this. I might seem cool and composed on the outside, but I have no fucking clue what's going on.'
"I don't know either, and I don't care, this is a-mei-zing..." Shiro thought, his face a mix of all emotions, although mainly pleasure, with his soul visibly floating out of his body.
'Poor Shiro, he's out of order after all this.' Ichigo said, mentally putting a hand on his heart and making a soldier's salute, 'To another fallen soldier.' he said sadly as he fake wiped a tear from his eye.
'No but seriously, what the fuck is going on.' he said.
"It's pretty simple, you guys are very similar, Yoruichi simply feels comfortable around you, like you do. You're also very powerful, even if she can't physically feel it, you exude a powerful, alpha like aura that's probably subconsciously attracting her to you." Mikasa explained.
Ichigo sighed, 'I guess you're right, I can't say she's not fun to be around.'
"Just stop questioning everything and enjoy it, it's not often two people interact like this after only a couple hours of meeting each other." Mikasa said as she forcibly kicked him out of his thoughts and back into the real world, where only a couple seconds had passed.
He decided to take the advice Mikasa had given him, and appreciate that he had somehow ended up in this situation literally every man on earth would pay to be in, "So, do you do this with everybody, or am I a first to make it this far?" he asked as he hit a particularly sensitive spot on her back, making her jump a bit in surprise.
"Pfft, I'm not some slut, I don't just do this with everybody I see. You're different, it's not often I meet somebody I can so naturally talk to, I can tell we're very similar, we're both laid-back, not exactly looking for a romantic relationship, but still looking for somebody that can be there for us when we need it, it's pretty obvious." she said.
"So you're saying we're like 'friends with benefits'?" he questioned.
"Ugh, I don't know what we are, and I don't care. Just go with it and stop questioning everything will you?" she said in a exasperated tone, "I like being around you and you like being around me, we have an oddly sexual relationship, we might fuck, but we don't want to be in a commitment like a relationship simply because that's how we are, that's all, what's so complicated?"
"Who said I liked you?" he said with a smirk.
"Oh, cause you don't?" she replied as she pushed her hips a bit more against him, using the extra space to turn around, looking straight at him.
Ichigo was trying really hard in that moment, trying really hard to go against his instincts that were screaming at to do something about the brown skinned beauty under him. Although he was unconsciously leaning down, and before he knew it, he had given up on resisting and had completely leaned down, surprising Yoruichi, who quickly got over it and reacted in kind, kissing him back.
They made out in that position for a couple minutes, both Ichigo and Yoruichi in their own world as they ran their hands across the other. Finally, they broke up. Staring at each other.
"Does that answer your question?" Ichigo asked.
"It was a rhetorical question, I knew you couldn't resist me." she said as she went in for a second turn, although Ichigo's eyes widened right as she said that, as he jumped out of the spring. Yoruichi looked at him, surprised, "What's wrong?" she asked, a small fear in her that she might have done something wrong.
"I just remembered that Isshin asked me to have a dinner with the Shiba family. And that I agreed, what time do you think it is?" he asked.
"I don't know, although I'm sure you're almost late by now." she answered.
"Damn." he cursed, "Oh, before I forget, I would like for you to get a couple things from the real world for tomorrow, trust me, we'll both enjoy it." he said.
Yoruichi raised an eyebrow, "And what would that be?" she questioned, to which Ichigo told her what he wanted, only ending up with Yoruichi being even more confused, "Uhh, okay."
"Just don't question it, you'll like it, trust me." he said with a smirk.
He dried off quickly after that, putting his clothes back on, "See ya." he said as he flashed up the stairs and out the lair.
"See ya." Yoruichi whispered, unable to not feel a bit of disappointment at the abrupt ending, although she quickly got over it, getting out and getting dressed, "Now about what he asked me to get..." she trailed off.
Chapter 11, done.
Alright so, about the whole IchigoxYoruichi thing, if you're confused about it, feel free to ask me, I understand it might be a bit weird how quickly it all happened.
This chapter might seem a bit filler, and to be honest I don't have much to say to that, so, sorry.
Also, me not including what Ichigo asked Yoruichi to get was intentional, I'll just say it'll be a bit controversial, and no, it's not some sex toy.
Thanks for reading.
