Notes-I need to be nice to my readers so I'm updating quickly! That and I finally finished another project I was working on that took some of my attention.

Still loving reviews! Nice ones, mean ones, I don't really care.


I had a lot of time after the party to think about what had happened. A lot of time for the memories of the procession out the door to haunt me.

My mother had decided that even if she was angry at me, I had to be polite and say goodbye to all my guests as they left.

It was blur except for a few key peoples. A few, Neji included, smiled on the way out, happy that I had stood up for myself and shown the girls they weren't all us men cared about. Even more just looked at me sadly, not saying a word as they left. More even either glared or ignored me. Ino and Sakura fit into the last one. On their way out the door Ino sent me her worst glare, one reserved for whoever got close to Sasuke, while Sakura pointedly ignored me. In between the two Yuki sent me a quick hurt look before returning her eyes to the ground. My friends opened their mouths to say something, but all decided against it.

Kiba was the only one to stop and say anything to me. For once he had no smile plastered to his face. His eyes were dark. "I know you didn't-couldn't- like her, but dude, that was a little harsh." He whispered. Had I hurt him as well as Yuki? I wondered sadly about that for awhile as well.

I was forced to clean up the mess, but for once I didn't complain. The mess my life had become was much worse and not nearly as easy to clean up.

My thoughts roamed through the evening while I methodically picked up the splintered table and swept up the trash. First Yuki had assumed I loved her-and kissed me for it- before the party. Kiba had seen that. With barely a start my mind registered that both me and Yuki had gotten what we wanted and had that happiness broken all in the same night. It was some party...

Most of the night up until the spin the bottle was simply boring after that. It was the usual party, music, junk food, and Kiba hitting on every girl in sight.

Then the cursed spin the bottle. I didn't want to think about it, but the overlapping memories of Kiba's lips and Yuki's both on mine wouldn't leave. As I thought about it, the differences between the two seemed to jump out at me.

Kiba's lips, though they had barely touched mine, were chapped and natural. They were pulled tighter, used to being in a smile. His hand had rested on my waist at the time and had been playing with the hem of my shirt. I might have imagined it, but now it seemed that Kiba had stayed in close to my face for just a second after parting to fully pull away.

Yuki on the other hand had not hidden the fact she wanted to keep the kiss going. She'd held me as close as she possible could, her arms locked in position around my neck. Her lips had been fully on mine, unlike with Kiba, and her tongue had been wanting attention. She had more lip than Kiba, and they had been softer and more well kept. Her kisses, both of them, had tasted of strawberries.

When I was finally allowed to get to bed I had realized I was sorry about Yuki. I was glad she knew I didn't like her in the way she liked me, but I wanted to apologize it had to be the way it did. I doubted that I could ever get close enough to her to say that. I'd be lucky if Ino and Sakura ever deemed me worthy of speech again.

I had nightmares that night, or at least I thought they were nightmares. Over and over I held Kiba in my arms, only to have him laugh cruelly and change into Yuki. Over and over she smothered me in kisses before my anger got the best of me and I pushed her to the ground. After that it was always different. Some times she hit her head and bled to death. Other times everyone left me and I went crazy. Others still everyone glared daggers at me, literally, and I myself died.

Every time I woke gasping for air, guilt twisting my intestines into knots.

The worst was when Yuki changed back into Kiba after she fell, and it was Kiba that looked up at me with tears in his eyes, hurt written all over his face. It was then I woke screaming.

Kiba liked Yuki. By hurting Yuki had I...

Had I lost Kiba?