CHAPTER 11
Three days later, Starsky was released from the hospital. Most of his bruises had healed and a knit cap covered the spot where his hair had been shaved to do the surgery on his skull. His jaw was still wiredtogether, making talking difficult, but as long as he kept his mouth shut, the wires were unnoticeable. He'd quickly adapted to using hand gestures and writing notes to communicate when he needed to, talking only when it was absolutely necessary. He still hadn't found a way to be able to eat some of his favorite junk foods but he was working on it.
Hutch wanted Starsky to go home and get some rest but he refused. He needed to see Nicky and so did his mother. That was an issue they both needed to resolve before they did anything else. Reluctantly, Hutch agreed to take them to the lockup to see the youngest member of the Starsky family.
A uniformed guard escorted Nicky into one of the private visiting rooms that were usually reserved for a prisoner and his lawyer. His eyes lit up with pleasure and he grinned broadly when he saw his mother and David waiting for him. Hutch had wisely opted to wait for them in the lobby.
"Ma! Davy!" he exclaimed "Man, am I ever glad to see you!" His first hint of trouble was when he moved towards his mother, arms outstretched to hug her, and she stepped closer to David, sheltered by his protective embrace. Nicky stopped and glanced from one set of sapphire blue eyes to another, eyes that were cold and unwelcoming. "Hey, what's the matter?" Nicky drawled, trying to bluff his way through the awkwardness of the moment. "Look, this is all just a big misunderstanding. We can get it cleared up and I can get out of here, right?"
"Not this time, Nick." Starsky said in a resigned voice.
"Oh, come on, Davy. I was drunk. I didn't know what the hell I was doing. You can't hold that against me." Nicky whined plaintively.
"Stop lying, Nicholas." Rachel said sharply, her voice sounding like steel. "For once in your life admit what you did!"
"Hey, Ma…I don't know what Davy told you but I don't know what the hell happened. I was drunk. I woke up in some fleabag motel the next morning with Davy's credit cards and a pocketful of money. I don't know how in the hell I got it or what happened to Davy."
"Bullshit," Starsky growled, his eyes narrowing dangerously. "You were sober enough to crawl all over town pretending to me while you charged out my credit cards and wiped out my bank account."
"Okay, Okay. So I took some of your money and used your credit cards. Big deal."
"It is a big deal. It's called theft by deception and defrauding the bank Those are both felonies, Nick. So is the assault and attempted murder of a police officer."
"Hey, now that's where you got it wrong. I never tried to kill anybody…especially you! You're my brother for god's sake! Maybe somebody else came in after I left and found you like that and decided to beat the shit out of you…but it wasn't me!" Nicky denied adamantly.
"Nicholas Marvin Starsky!" Rachel's voice cut through the air like a knife. "You can not lie your way out of this! We know what you did! You tried to kill your own brother! You tried to kill David!"
Nicky's eyes narrowed as he frantically tried to think his way out of this situation. He had always been able to sweet talk his mother into believing anything he said but when she teamed up with David and took his side, it was impossible to break through the united front they presented to the world. He felt old resentments and anger bubble to the surface. In a cold, bitter voice he snarled,
"Okay, so I smacked Davy around a little and took his money and credit cards. So what? He's still alive, ain't he?" He glared at his older brother. "All you had to do was give me a few bucks when I asked for it. You didn't have to act like such a self righteous prick."
"Smacked him around a little?" Rachel said, her own temper reaching the boiling point. "You broke his jaw and fractured his skull! He would have died if Ken hadn't found him when he did!"
"Oh, yeah…good old Hutch…showed up in nick the time as usual. He's nothing but a fucking queer after my brother's ass!"
Before either of her sons knew what she was going to do, Rachel stepped forward and slapped Nicky across the cheek, hard enough to leave a perfect imprint of her hand and to jerk his head sharply to one side. When Nicky raised his hand as if to strike her back, Starsky leap forward and grabbed his wrist, deftly twisting his arm behind his back and jerking his hand up between his shoulder blades. "Don't even think about it, little brother!" he snarled in Nicky's ear.
"Fuck you!" Nicky snarled, "Fuck you both! You're both nothing! Do you hear me? Nothing! I don't need either one of you!"
The guard came into the room, attracted by the loud angry voices. He took in the scene at a glance and reached for Nicky, snapping a pair of handcuffs around his wrists. As he led Nicky out of the room, the younger Starsky cursed both his mother and his brother. "Neither one of you ever cared about me!" he hissed, "You were never there for me! I hate you! I hate you both!"
As the door shut behind him, Rachel broke down into tears, burying her face in her hands. Starsky immediately pulled her into his arms, trying to soothe and comfort her, to take away the hateful sting of Nicky's words. Safe in her son's embrace, Rachel buried her face against his shoulder and gave vent to her grief and her pain. Her youngest son had finally revealed his true colors and thrown the love she had given him all his life back into her face, rejecting it and his family with a few venomous words. Suddenly, she felt like a very old woman, betrayed by the son she had kept with her while her eldest son, the one she had sent away, was still there to offer his support and keep her world in balance.
When she had regained her composure, Starsky gently guided her from the room. Hutch took one look at their stricken faces and the tears still brimming in Rachel's eyes and he knew that the visit with Nicky had not gone well. None of them spoke as they left the building and Hutch drove them to Starsky's apartment.
After making sure his mother was settled comfortably in his bedroom so she could rest, Starsky joined Hutch in the living room. He slumped down on the sofa and looked at his partner and best friend solemnly. "He's just like the scum we deal with everyday." Starsky said in a forlorn voice. "It's too late to expect him to chance. He's too full of hate and anger…at everybody and everything in his life."
"That's not your fault." Hutch pointed out.
"I know." Starsky said with a heavy sigh. "Even when we were kids, Nicky was the one who always looked for the easy way out….who always blamed everybody else for his problems. He's never grown up and he never will."
"You can't do anything else to help Nicky right now but your mom still needs you."
"Yeah, I know. She's taking it hard…Nicky was the only one she had left after I went away." A thin smile tugged at his lips. "I could have ended up just like him if I had stayed in New York. I was already hanging out with a pretty wild crowd."
"Which is why your mother sent you out here." Hutch reminded him. "To protect you from that."
"And that left Nicky wide open for all the temptations I left behind…without anybody there to protect him…except for the local wiseguys. Assholes that Nicky learned to look up to and admire."
"While you had role models like John Blaine and your Uncle Al to keep you on the right track."
"I'm not sure they could have kept Nicky on the up and up. I think Nicky's been beyond saving for a long time."
"You should get some rest too." Hutch told him, deciding that it was time to change the subject before Starsky got caught up in a guilt trip that he didn't deserve. He watched as Starsky stretched out on the sofa, throwing one arm up over his eyes as he tried to relax. Hutch made himself a cup of tea and sat down in Starsky's wingback wicker chair to watch over his friend as he slept.
