Disclaimer:
Since I'm such a jack ass I'm only going to say two words Naruto's not mine…okay three words I don't own Naruto….okay 4 words Naruto does not belong to me, okay you know what I think, i thinkyou got the message. I don't own Naruto and or Naruto characters. I don't own their script and I don't own their personalities or their physical appearance's. However, I do own this story "Reiko and Sai rhymes with pie in your eye" and Reiko. Yes everything about her I own, so to all you bluenettes out there I own you. That's right I own your hair. Just kidding (suddenly has a expression of anger) (goes back to normal just as quickly) kidding again, but I OWN REIKO. Sai is owned by Daigona who has a hell of a lot of editing to do when she gets around to this.
Daigona: I wonder what the reviewers responses would be if I didn't edit the next chapter. Hmm...
Everyone: NO! That would be like trying to read a two year olds scribbles!
Ghostio: Huh? You can't understand a two year olds writing! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...
( Everyone turns to stare at Ghostio with a look on their face that clearly says that they think Ghostio is mentally unstable, meaning she's psychotic.)
Ghostio: Hey, why are you giving me wierd loo- ... AHHHHHHHHH!
( Before poor pathetic ghostio knew what was happening she found herself in a white padded room.)
Ghostio: WAH! ...Hey, let me out of he- ...SQUISHY!
Daigona: Did you say you wanted out? ...OKAY!
Ghostio: NO! NEVER! DON'T TOUCH MY SQUISHY!
Sakura: Well, ...nevermind them, OHHH SASUK- njjnasdvizxcvifjkdf...
( If you don't already know, Ghostio has tried to swallow sakura's head, yup, much like Stitch when he was eating the cake.)
Daigona: GHOSTIO SPIT THAT THING OUT BEFORE YOU GET RABIES OR SOMETHING!
Ghostio: currently spitting out "THAT THING" ...uck! YOU TASTE LIKE TURNIP AND COW PADDIES! GAHHH I'm probably diseased now! OH HORRIBLE HORRIBLE MEEEEEE! WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!
( The pathetic sakura is sitting in a corner covered in a greenslime-like substance.)
Daigona: Eww. Gross. Never do that again. Now... as I was SAYING! ( Glares at Ghostio and Sakura) I will not edit the next chapter when Ghostio has finished it, therefore I will let you have a laugh or two at the mistakes that she makes, now won't that be fun! NOW ON WITH THE CHAPTER!
Chapter 11: "Reiko Kidnapped and the Card Game of the Century!"
Kisame brought "Sasuke" near his and Itachi's camp. He was brimming with excitement that he had caught "Sasuke" without any problems. Although he was suspicious as to why the young Uchiha was clinging onto him for dear life. Bah! Who cares? He got "Sasuke" and Itachi was going to be pleased. No doubt the foolish Naruto who held the fox demon would come rushing to the aid of his comrade.
'It's like killing two birds with one stone. But there's something different about him.' Kisame thought as he looked at "Sasuke".
(A/N: Who the hell uses a stone to kill birds? Why not a gun? Or better yet a bullet that actually does the damage. Geez, people we need to get out of the Stone Age and go back to the present time. Just because a caveman's intelligence rivals most of the world's populations intelligence doesn't mean we should get stuck in that time period. Oh wait, I forgot those people can't read… or can and just suck at it. Like George W. Bush for example, and to all fans of him I'm sorry I just don't like the bastard. Way to go me apologize and insult that guy again. Aren't I kind? Probably not ...meh.)
Reiko's POV
'Is the damned beast gone yet, I mean why can't it just leave like the other beast, aka Sakura.' I thought as I looked over the fish man's shoulder to see that in fact the furry monster was gone, '…What am I holding?'
"GAHHH," I screamed as I pushed myself off the fish man.
But I stumbled over a small rock and crashed into a tree. I looked up at the guy again this time without as much fear but more like, uh, more like curiosity. Yeah that's it! Curiosity!
" What's wrong Sasuke? Didn't think I would find you? Did you? Do I scare you?" 'fishy' said.
'Sasuke? What the hell? Ooooooh he thinks I'm Sasuke…. should I be upset? Wait a minute, "fishy"? Isn't there a dude in Naruto that's supposed to look like a shark? Well yeah, but this guy looks more like a fish. But then again I've been known to screw things like this up. Alls well, he's Kisame now…did I just have a debate with myself?'
(A/N: That you did… did I just answer myself?)
(E/N: Uh huh!)
"Well for one jack ass, I most certainly can't know if you would find me or not, because stupid, I didn't even know you were looking for me. Which would mean that you were being cheap, because if I had known you were looking for me you would have never, and I mean never, have found me. Secondly it's not you that scares me, it's more like that hideous thing you call a face that scares me. You might want to consider a paper bag or plastic surgery. By the way, you stupid loser, I'm not Sasuke." I told Kisame with my arms crossed as I leaned against the tree.
Kisame's jaw dropped as he looked at me with a look of complete shock.
'Yeah that's right you stupid idiot. I, the great Reiko, have left yee in a state of shock. What with my amazing abilities for surprise, yee not know that I am not one with pole shoved up his ass, Young fish who swims upstream.'
"Kisame, did you get my brother yet or are you back to tell me that once again you have failed?.", said a calm voice that seemed to surround us.
Normal POV
Reiko looked around her to find where the voice was coming from, and Kisame who seemed to recover from his shock of finding out that Reiko wasn't Sasuke answered back to the voice, "No Itachi but it seems that this person I found knows Sasuke."
Itachi appeared in front of them, dressed in what Reiko noticed as his usual clothes. But what's this, lacking a shirt! Wow, Itachi forgot to put on his shirt! Hah! "The great Uchiha" my ass!
(A/N: How can you not notice you're not wearing a shirt? Don't ask me, I've never done that …although one of my aunts forgot to put her skirt on when she went out for work. Talk about embarrassing... or fashion statement!)
(E/N: Definately NOT a fashion statement.)
(A/N: It couldn've been.)
(E/N: The only person... or thing that would think that was a fashion statement would be you or a brain dead rabbit.)
(A/N: Ouch my pride!)
(E/N: What pride?)
(A/N: My lion pryde...j/k I don't have any pride/pryde of any sort. You know why? Cause I just don't give a damn!)
"Who is this Kisame?" Itachi said as he looked at Reiko with a threatening look.
"Yes Kisame, who is this?" Reiko said as she mocked Itachi imitating his stance and exaggerating a frown.
(A/N: Yeah, usually when your mocking someone, exaggeration is one of the necessary keys to annoyance. Learn from me young tadpoles and one day you can turn into a great annoying frog like myself. That is if you want almost everyone to turn crazy and/or commit some act of suicide or homicide. Meh, whatever floats your boat.)
"Are you mocking me?" Itachi said looking at Reiko with fury.
Reiko tucked in her chin and started to exaggerate Itachi's movements and voice, "Are you mocking me?"
Itachi growled and Kisame drew out his sword. A very …big sword that people, especially fish people should not be allowed to own.
'Holy shit that's a big sword… now why do I think that sounds dirty? I wonder if he's compensating for something?' Reiko thought as she looked at him still using her exaggerated look, that amazingly stroke a remarkable resemblance to that of a diseased/disfigured rabbit. 'Never mind, I don't want to ever find out. It would scar me for life.'
Reiko shuddered at her thoughts and looked back at the sword-wielding maniac.
(A/N: Move over samurai pizza cats for samurai wanna be sharks. Although I still think that that show can't be beat, that: meaning Samurai Pizza Cats. Plus samurai wanna be sharks doesn't sound as good as samurai pizza cats. So never mind, don't move over samurai pizza cats.)
(E/N: Stupid.)
"I'm not going to tell you again kid, answer Itachi-sama or prepare for the consequences.", Kisame told her through clenched teeth.
"Peh, stupid party shitters." Reiko muttered, as she looked at Kisame, "Yeah buddy I was mocking you and I'd gladly do it again I tell you! I'd do it again."
Kisame growled at her and swung the sword at her, causing Reiko to fall over yet again and roll around on the ground to avoid get diced up. Finally the psychopath was stopped by a kunai that nearly hit him. The two morons, being Reiko and Kisame looked up at Itachi.
"Kisame, don't kill the witness or I might have to kill you too." Itachi told him coolly.
"Kisame, don't kill the witness or I might have to kill you too." Reiko said getting up and mocking Itachi again.
Another kunai was thrown and hit the bark of the tree vibrating from impact. Reiko's eyes shifted over to the blade that rested right next to her ear. Then looking back at Itachi, her eyes slowly changing from fright back to normal insanity.
(A/N: Whenever I think of eyes like insanity I can't help but picture googly eyes.)
"I thought you were told not to mock me again." Itachi said to her in his usual cold voice.
"And I thought I told you that I would gladly do it again." Reiko told him defiantly.
But bad guys usually don't appreciate such defiance. So without a moment's hesitation another kunai was thrown at the interrogation-immune teen. This method was able to grab Reiko's attention once again to the kunai-throwing murderer.
"Listen kid, tell us your name... now." Kisame said looking at Reiko with anger that appeared to have reached it's near limit.
(A/N: But we can't have anger that's nearly reached it limit now can we. Teachers always say we should aim for above and beyond. Which is basically the same as over the top isn't it?)
"It's not so much my name as it is everyone else's. I was but bestowed this name and must share it with the other people and or pets with this name." Reiko said looking at him with a psychotically happy grin.
"JUST TELL US YOUR GOD DAMN NAME KID!" Kisame shouted at her with such force that her hair started to fly backwards.
Reiko sighed before saying, "Oh alright." She inhaled deeply and said as quickly as a tongue twister, "Supercallafragilisticexpielladociousbluenette."
Kisame's vein started to throb on his forehead and Itachi's frown deepened.
Reiko threw her hand up in the air, "Hey don't blame me! My parents named me this. I swear on my honor that, that's my name."
Itachi looked at her with suspicion, "Alright then what's your clan name."
"Well it's not so much my cl…," But Reiko was interrupted by Kisame who started to lift up his sword for another swing.
"Okay geez, no need to get your thongs in a twist. Now it's key to say this really fast.It's Shesellsseashellsdownbytheseashore, and if my clan name isn't good enough for you my middle name's M-I-S-S-I-S-S-I-P-P-I."
(A/N: Just so you know all of those names were meant to be said quickly even M-I-S-S-I-S-S-I-P-P-I.)
"Fine, I don't care about who you are anymore. It's clear to me that you are just trying to give us trouble.", Itachi announced as he looked at her. "Just tell us where Sasuke is, now!"
Reiko smiled at him widely, "You must be really dumb! He's most definitely somewhere."
"FK KID JUST TELL US WHERE THE HELL HE IS!" Kisame shouted this time spit spraying out as well.
"GAAAAHHHH! Don't spit on me you freak of nature. I don't want to turn into some sort of diseased fish like you."
As soon a Reiko finished her sentence she found an arm going around her neck and a kunai pointed towards her face.
"Tell us where he is… now.", said Itachi looking intensely at what I imagine would be the back of Reiko's head.
"O-ok-okay," Reiko stuttered, "He's in this dimension!" Reiko finished with a complete 360 with her attitude.
Itachi drew the kunai down towards Reiko slowly.
"NOT MY EYES! NOT MY EYES! (breathe) I'LL FOREVER HAVE THE IMPRINT OF KISAME'S FACE FOREVER IN MY MIND AND NOT BE ABLE TO LOOK AT ANYTHING (breathe) OR ANYONE ELSE TO MAKE IT BETTER EVER AGAIN!"
"I wasn't going to stab your eyes. That's just a warning for you.", Itachi told her while still holding the struggling girl. "Now tell us where in this dimension Sasuke happens to be."
"This universe, and if that's not good enough for you he's in this galaxy, and if that's still not good enough for you he's in this solar system, and if that's still, still not good enough for you he's on this planet." Reiko said watching the knife come closer and closer to her face.
"THAT'S IT!" Kisame said as he ran at her only to suddenly fall over.
"Kisame, what are you doing?" Itachi asked looking at the blue man as he lay on the ground.
"……." Reiko just stared at where Kisame was before she punched her hand in realization. "I know! I know! I finally gave the poor lout a seizure! YAY! MISSION COMPLETE!"
"…Some one sent you on a mission to make Kisame have an seizure?"
"Yeah! ME!" Reiko said pounding her fist on her chest with pride.
"….."
Reiko, who just finished taking her finger out of her ear therefore having a disgusting amount of earwax on it, looked at her finger then looked at Itachi.
"Can I wipe this on your arm?"
With Team 7 (At Tsunade's office)
Tsunade paced around the room her irritation evident… as well …the fact that Kakashi wears a mask!
"Damn, why would the Akatsuki want Sasuke again? I thought they didn't want another sharingan user around. And the fact that they took Reiko still unnerves me. How can we get her back?"
"It's alright we can leave her. She'll probably get killed anyway. Right Sasuke!" Sakura exclaimed turning to Sasuke to find out his answer.
Sasuke nodded and Sai turned to the two with a look of pure rage. Kakashi, who saw the angry burning in her eyes, held her back.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN LEAVE HER BEHIND! SHE'S WORTH MORE THAN 10 BILLION TIMES WHAT YOU'RE WORTH! IF YOU'RE WORTH ANYTHING! YOU DISGUSTING LOOKING FREAK THAT WAS OPPOINTED TO BE UNCLASSIFIED!"
Naruto brandished a lookof pure determination, "I SAY WE GO! We haven't had a good mission in a long time. LET'S DO IT!"
Tsunade shook her head, "No, I won't allow it. Naruto have you forgotten who they are really after?"
Naruto paused before saying, "Sasuke?"
"Now who's on your team?"
"Sakura and... Sasuke."
"That's why you can't go, and I can't send Kakashi because he will be a dead give away that Sasuke's here, which leaves my only option.", Tsunade finished with a sigh.
Sai looked up from where she stood at the blonde leader, "Don't tell me your.."
"SEND GAI AND HIS TEAM TO GO GET REIKO!", Tsunade paused and looked at Sai, "What's Reiko clan name Sai?"
"Her full name is Reiko Ayumi Miharu Yamashita. Why?"
"Never you mind.", Tsunade told her. "FIND REIKO AYUMI MIHARU YAMASHITA!"
'I don't see the point in this.', Sai thought looking at Tsunade with confusion, 'Do they even know who the hell the Akatsuki are dealing with? Do they know what Reiko's going to think?'
Sasuke looked over at Sai and noticed the look of discomfort on her face, "What's wrong?"
"(sigh) Tsunade-sama, Reiko doesn't like Gai so much. She's probably going to give him more trouble than who they are up against.", Sai stated.
Gai's Team
"Hhheeeeeelllllooo my budding flowers. The Hokage herself gave us our mission today!"
"It's not to go steal back the money she lost gambling again, is it?" asked Tenten as she sharpened her kunais against the other.
"Keh, if it's that again I refuse to go. Gai-sensei you can't honestly believe that, that could even be called a mission. We should just go and get a real one."
"Neji-san we must go and do this mission. For we, team (what ever they are) fight for the citizens of Konoha no matter what the obstacle may be.", Gai decides to join in with Lee's speech, "No matter the reason we will be there to help. Whether a child lost their pet, the hokage lost their money, or an animal is stuck in a tree. Together, as a team, we will strike down evil that murders our youth. We will make sure that there will always be JUSTICE!"
"…..fine Gai-sensei what's the mission." Neji said in defeat not wanting to here more of his teacher and comrade's speech.
(A/N: Though it would be fun to tell someone that, but who the hell would want to listen to it.)
With Reiko
Kisame had woken up shortly after Reiko's… disgusting question. Seems that the 'fish'just had what I like to call a mental breakdown. Of course he was still pissed at the young girl who was now tied to a tree.
"Tell us where Sasuke is now." Itachi said rubbing the bridge of his nose to calm the oncoming headache that the blue haired pixie had caused.
(A/N: I've just noticed something, ummm Reiko's hair is blue black like Sasuke's hair. You know? It's all blue when light hits it, or when pieces of their hair shines.)
"After you wouldn't let me wipe my ear substance on your arm you expect me to do a favor for you. I know not!" Reiko said to him throwing her nose up in the air.
"The saying is 'I think not'. Now tell me where my damned brother is NOW!"
"Nuh uh! I really know that I'm not going to tell you. I don't have to think about that. SO HA, " Reiko looked at him and raised an eyebrow before answering his question, "Why, are you a stalker?"
"….." Itachi remained silent watching her suspiciously, before adding with attitude, "What do you think?"
(A/N: Stupid Itachi, Reiko doesn't think! She even told you that. My goodness man grow a brain.)
"….OH MY GOD! YOU ARE A STALKER! Wait a minute stalker starts with 's', and squirrel starts with 's'… YOU WORK FOR THE SQUIRRELS DON'T YOU!"
"…Tell me where my brother is, I don't have time to deal with this nonsense."
"But you have time to deal with the squirrels, which you did not deny." Reiko shot back glaring at Itachi.
"For the love of- Just.tell.us.where.Sasuke.is!", Kisame told her in frustration.
"(sigh) I guess I have to tell you again. He's in… this country!" Reiko said cheerfully.
"Where in this country?" Itachi asked her.
"Near the ground." Reiko replied smiling at her own stupidity.
"Where near the ground?" Kisame said grinding his teeth.
"Under the sky." Reiko said while closing her eyes because her smile was so huge.
"Where under the sky?" Itachi asked her eyes burning with fury.
"…If you still haven't gotten it yet I'm not going to tell you." Reiko snottily before adding, "I gave you enough hints."
Withgreat speed Itachi went up and grabbed Reiko's face, forcing her to look into his red eyes. Reiko just stared back and started to move her eyes every now and again, then realizing that his eyes changed to red… not good.
"Hmm, that's very odd." Itachi said in surprise looking at Reiko in slight shock with his eyes still red. "No matter, it would probably do you no use anyway for where you're going."
(A/N: Just to clear up if there are any mishaps, Itachi wasn't using his sharigan so his eyes were black. I guess he didn't find Reiko you know… intimidating.)
Inside Reiko's mind
When Reiko blinked again she was no longer in the forest. She was standing in a middle of a burning field with flames flicking all around her.
"Tell me where Sasuke is. NOW!" Itachi's commanding voice said from all around her.
"I told you," Reiko said through gritted teeth, "Maybe if you weren't so stupid you would get the hint that he has to be somewhere you stupid!"
"I don't think you understand the peril your in."
"I know that you think you understood what you thought I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard isn't what I meant." Reiko told him while crossing her arms.
(A/N: Thanks to my father who told me that quote… though I don't know who made it but thanks!)
"…What?"
"Sigh, I guess you don't get it, do you? So let me tell you, and I'll say it slow so you understand? I..Don't..Really..Know..And..If..I..Did..I..Wouldn't..Tell..You..For..10,000..Million..Dollars..You..Sack..Of..Crap! Congratulations genius! You now know the essence and the amazing abilities of a pest! Glad you understand!"
"Keh, Well I hope you have fun dealing with your worst nightmare." Itachi said to her before she felt his presence leave.
"I'LL TRY!" Reiko hollered back waving happily.
Outside Reiko's mind
"We should have just did this at the beginning. Damn that kid is annoying. Hey Itachi what's the kid's name, you must have gotten it when you went into …what ever the kid's name is mind."
Itachi looked at Kisame with a bored look on his face, "I believe her name is Sai-chan. I'm not quite sure, her thoughts kept jumping all over the place. But the name Sai kept coming up."
(A/N: Okey Dokey let me explain something here, if you think you got it just ignore this, Reiko has like a 20 track mind there are tons of thoughts going around at the same time. Currently he has her on one track right now. Because... let's see her current thoughts are like the train, and as we all know a train can only be on one track. (Unless it's busted) So far during this she's only been on one…I repeat only one.)
The two watched her face as they saw her mouth twist down a bit and her eyes widen for a second, and then she let out a yell.
"AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAH(breath)AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA." Reiko laughed/yelled.
"What the hell is going on?" Itachi said to himself looking at her with surprise slash astonishment.
(A/N: This story seems to have a lot of slashes in it… hehe it could be a slasher movie! …Sorry I make horrible puns, It's a curse as well as a gift).
"Is she supposed to be laughing! Itachi I don't think she should be laughing!" Kisame exclaimed looking at her.
"I don't understand what's going on, I'm going to check."
Back Inside Reiko's Mind
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA."
Itachi looked at the young girl who was holding her stomach laughing at the person in front of her that was yelling at her. For some odd reason though Reiko still looked pretty scared. But not the kind of scared Itachi was looking for, more like… well, Reiko scared.
All of a sudden the world Itachi made started to move a bit, wobbling and twisting and such. Kind of like drunk vision, if you get what I mean! And so Itachi was thrown out of Reiko's mind.
Back in the real world
Reiko stared at the two men that looked at her in shock. Yes, how the hell was probably what was crossing their mind's right now, and what probably astonished them even more was Reiko looking like there was no big surprise anyway.
"What?" Reiko asked looking at the two guys with a raised eyebrow at their expressions.
"How did- How did you get out?" Kisame said looking at her with shock, "No one ever gets out of Itachi's attack. How did you do it?"
"Huh?"
"I pulled you into my world. It takes in the victim's, in this case, your mind. I make you see your own worst nightmare or anything I want and you are supposed to go insane."
Reiko burst out laughing before she answered Itachi, "Stupid, for one I'm already insane so you probably wouldn't even have to try for that, believe me I was in a mental institution I know what I'm talking about. Second buddy I don't think you should try with my mind I have like 20 to 50 tracks and the train ain't stopping for no one, no how."
Itachi blinked in surprise before his forehead wrinkled in frustration, "Then how come you were laughing? And who was that woman that was yelling at you?"
Reiko blinked at him a few times before rubbing the back of her head with her hand, "Oh you saw that huh? That was my mom, she was my worst nightmare and the faces she makes when she yells at me are the funniest expressions I've ever seen. I can't help but laugh."
"Surely you can't be serious?" Kisame said looking at the blue wonder.
"Yeah, I am, and don't call me Shirley it's Supercalafragilisticexpieelladociousbluenette."
"I thought your name was Super-what-ever you said, but Itachi says it's Sai."
"Super-what-ever you said is not my name, but someone with a dull little mind like yours might need some help so just call me Supey!" Reiko said not catching on he called her Sai.
"…kay." Kisame said looking at the girl with a strange look on his face.
"Kisame we better get back to camp, and bring the girl with you, she might slow us down." Itachi commented before he leapt into the air.
(E/N: That didn't make any sense, if she would slow you down then aren't you supposed to leave her behind? Meh!)
(A/N: Keyword : might. Besides since when have I ever made sense, you knew me since gr.3! I'm not changing for anyone.)
Reiko backed away from Kisame as he went to pick her up, "Don't touch me! I don't know where you've been!"
"What the hell are you talking about?"
Reiko snorted before looking back at him with a dull expression and a mischievous sparkle that she usually carried in her eye, "Well I know that you definitely haven't slept with a woman. But that still doesn't rule out you sleeping with men…or fish for that matter. Now does it fishy?"
Kisame growled while looking back at her with anger, "Shut up you little baka, now hurry up I want to get back to camp."
Reiko grumbled as she climbed on Kisame's back feeling very uncomfortable, "If you try anything I'll tear you a new shit hole, got.it.fishy?"
"Yeah, yeah I got it." Kisame said as he followed very far behind Itachi because of this little delay that Reiko just had to cause.
At the Camp Site
Something about the camp looked familiar to Reiko as she looked at Itachi's camp and noticed that the tent wasn't hung up by rope but by using a couple of tree limbs, then it came to her and now she finally realized why Itachi wasn't wearing a shirt and took a look at Kisame's foot to confirm her thoughts. Yup, yup it was most definitely what she thought, but she wasn't going to tell them that!
'So that's whose camp I took that stuff from, and here I thought that it was abandoned. Alls well, what can you do?' Reiko thought to herself, 'I thought it looked familiar though.'
(A/N: Remember Kisame wasn't wearing a sock because Reiko used it to gag Sakura with during the bell hunt.)
"Still didn't find who stole the camp stuff or our clothes when we went to take our bath huh Itachi?" Kisame asked the young murderer.
"No, the thief seemed to leave no chakra trace behind. We're either dealing with a highly skilled nin or an animal."
"I'm not a animal you derk!" Reiko shouted before covering her mouth with her hands as she realized her mistake.
Itachi raised an eyebrow at their 'guest', "We never did say that you did Sai-chan but maybe you know something about this hmmm?"
"Maybe I don't hmmmmm?" Reiko responded looking back at him with her snotty attitude returning.
"Do you have any proof that you don't?" Kisame asked her, while taking a seat on a log that was placed near the fireplace.
"Do I ever seem to know anything about anything?" Reiko asked back.
"…. From what I've seen so far I'd have to agree with you Sai, you really don't know anything."
Reiko cocked her head to the side in question to the land fish, 'Did he just call me Sai? …Do they know Sai? Well might as well play along it's not like I have much to lose anyway?'
"Yes, Yes you're absolutely right fishy-san. I'm glad your not as dumb as I was thinking you were, because if you were I think you might want to try out for special ed… or the thing below that. You might not even want to do that, I don't want to set you up for disappointment because you weren't smart enough to join. But anyway you know what I mean, you're dumb." Reiko rambled in response to the blue-gilly-fish-man.
"Hey kid, I'm bored, what do you want to do?" Kisame asked as Itachi went into the poorly made tent (thanks to Reiko's thieving) to grab something for them to do.
"Oh I know, I know, Itchy-san grab some.."
Elsewhere and a few hours later With Gai and Team
"Hurry my youthful flowers, we must save the poor dear that is captured. Who knows what the evil scoundrels have done."
(A/N: I really didn't think I'd have to tell you who's talking but since some of you might need to, it's Gai).
"Yes Sensei, you're right. We must go quickly or who knows what may happen to Konoha's youth!" Lee said encouraging Gai's statement.
Neji and Tenten remained quiet as they usually are as the raced through the woods looking for someone that fitted Sasuke's description. Sai came too, who met up with the four by Tsunade's orders, after hearing Sai's comment on Reiko's dislike for the green—spandex-wearing-nin, she didn't need another one of her ninjas coming back and giving her complaints about how much their therapy was costing because of Reiko.
'Damn Reiko, why do you always have to attract trouble! It's like you have this stupid magnet on you that attracts any danger within six hundred miles of you!' Sai thought to herself as she ran swiftly following the other chuunins and their teacher. 'At least I get to meet Neji.'
Gai stopped and raised his hand to show the others to do the same. After a while the others could hear why as well. What sounded not to far offwas pretty much like, "GO FISH YOU CANNIBALISTIC... FISH! IN YOUR FACE FISHY! YOU TOO ITCHY-SAN! I'M GOING TO WIN! AND YOU KNOW WHY! BECAUSE YOU'RE BOTH GOING TO LOSE!"
"Who's that Gai-sensei? They're awfully loud, you don't think that that's them do you?" Tenten asked Gai in curiousity.
But it wasn't Gai who answered; it was a relieved Sai who straightened from the weight that was lifted off of her, "No that's Reiko alright. Seems she's still alive, hopefully she'll keep up that stupid victory dance of hers for a while."
"Hmmph I have a better idea. BYAKYUGAN!" Neji shouted activating his kekkai genkai.
Back at the camp with Reiko
"Shut up, only weaklings fight with cards. The strong fight with combat." Itachi grumbled as he re-shuffled the cards.
"And only rabbits have red eyes." Reiko retorted back to Itachi with a snuff.
(A/N: Now I really don't know what a snuff is… but it sounded fun so I put it in!)
(E/N: Only you Ghostio, only you.)
"Well it's true, only the strong fight with combat." Kisame said trying to justify his and Itachi's loss.
"Nah that's just what losers say." Reiko said back to him with a bright smile, "Don't worry though fishy-san I won't tell anybody that you're a cannibal. As long as one day you turn your evil ways back to the light."
Kisame growled in response and Itachi looked on angry that his defeat was to a chil; a child with some sort of brain disorder at that. As Reiko,still laughing, waitedas Itachi dealt out the cards, she remembered something from before Itachi had used the final stage of the sharingan on her.
"Itchy-san? What did you meanwhen you saidsomething other than the way that I acted was odd?"
Itachi looked up at her instead of at the cards. He sighed before he put them down, Kisame looking up as well in curiosity as to what Itachi was going to reveal.
"Supey-chan, you know about chakra right?" Itachi asked receiving a nod from Reiko. "Well you see, everyone has chakra and I mean everyone. With the sharingan I'm able to see someone's chakra, but in your case, I don't any."
(A/N: And there's your answer as to why Sasuke looked at Sai funny during their fight.)
(E/N: WHOOT! Have chakra but can't see it, that is so much easier for sneaking up on people. Especially Hyuuga's. snicker)
Reiko's face transformed to a look of horror, "DOES THAT MEAN I'M DEAD! MY MOM ALWAYS SAID WHEN I'M TIRED I LOOK LIKE A ZOMBIE! I NEVER EVER THOUGHT THAT I ACTUALLY WAS ONE! …cool." (E/N: O.o)
"I don't think you understand Supey-chan, you do have chakara. Yours is just… different, I know it's there since I can feel it, and you have a lot of it. Supey-chan you have much potential, you might be of use to the Akatsuki but since we have to report back soon I am afraid we have to go. We will come back during your..."
Back with Gai and friends
Sai leapt off branch after branch following Neji along with everyone else. Not to long after Neji turned offhis Byakyugan when they spotted Reiko sitting by a campfire… alone.
'Damn Reiko, having to have such a damn loud voice. Why couldn't she be normal so we wouldn't be mislead that she wasn't so far away.' Thought Sai as she looked at Reiko with anger.
'Oh my! That boy Reiko sure looks like Sasuke, perhaps I could get to know him and we can go on a date!' Tenten thought as she looked at Reiko's lone form sitting down and spinning a kunai on one finger.
'Humph, this is what we came to get, a stupid Sasuke wanna be. We should've just left him.' Neji thought to himself looking at Reiko with his arms crossed.
"YOUNG YOUTH WE ARE HERE TO RESCUE YOU! DON'T WORRY! YOU WILL BE SAFE!" Gai yelled to a surprised Reiko.
Reiko took one look at Gai and her eyes widenedwith fear, "TOO MUCH HAIR, TOO MUCH HAIR, TOO MUCH HAIR, TOO MUCH HAIR!"
Reiko by now was huddled up in a ball and shouting out the same words with the occasional breath for air. Sai walked over to the screaming blue haired freak, and kicked her in the side.
"Get up Reiko, we have to go back to Konoha and report to the hokage immediately." Sai said looking at her with a grim expression.
Reiko shot out an arm while still covering her face from their view, "As long as I don't have to look at that!"
Sai let out a long sigh as she pulled her friend up, "Listen Reiko, just get up and follow me. You don't have to look at the spandex wearing retard if you don't want to."
Reiko looked up at Sai with big dramatic tears in her eyes, "Really Sai-chan?"
Sai smiled at Reiko, "Really Reiko."
As Reiko stood up Sai's expression changed completely. Sai smacked Reiko upside the head as the other nins stood back and watched, "DON'T YOU DARE DO THAT AGAIN YOU LITTLE LOSER! WE TOLD YOU TO STAY THERE! YOU DIDN'T FOLLOW THAT SLIMY SHARK FOR CANDY DID YOU!"
"Itai! Sai-chan stop hitting me! No, I did not follow him for candy… though I probably would've. You see there was a squirrel there and well… I figured I'd rather not take the squirrel on, they hunt in groups where as fish don't. So… I guess I really don't have a reason, huh?...(shrugs) What do you know?"
Sai's eyebrows twitched as she looked at Reiko, the others looked on with shockedexpressions on their faces, as Reiko and Sai continued to argue over the justification of Reiko not fighting off Kisame or calling for help.
"It's not like they would've helped me Sai-chan! I know they don't like me! You know as well as I do that they wouldn't help me. Did they want to get me Sai-chan? Because if you say they did I know that, that's not the truth now is it?"
Sai looked at Reiko staring at her hard, trying to find out what Reiko was thinking before saying, "Reiko, I don't really know if they would or not. But I know for one thing, I would Reiko. Now can you just come with us before it gets dark out… and the squirrels come out and get us?"
With those last words Reiko immediately perked up, grabbing onto Sai's arm and grabbing Neji's hand as she went by him she nearly flew with the speed she was traveling at. And with a speed like that it wasn't long before the team came upon the Konoha gates.
"Look at those giant toothpicks in the ground Sai-chan! It looks like they're fashioned to be used as a fence!" Reiko exclaimed looking at the huge gate in fascination.
"That's because they are Reiko, and you saw them before." Sai said, as she looked at the dumb Sasuke look-a-like.
"I know that! I just felt like talking like an idiot! I wonder what they're trying to keep out?" Reiko asked to no one in peculiar trying to waste time as they waited for the other nins who Reiko had left behind in her haste to get to the village.
(A/N: Now that I think about it, I always, or most of the time, talk like an idiot... maybe because I am one. Alls well only Daigona and God will know. How 'bout it Daigona do I always talk like an idiot or what?)
(E/N: Sometimes you scare me because you strangely become serious or sane, but yes you do talk like an idiot most of the time. ...And lets keep it that way. )
"Or maybe it's what they're trying to keep in?" Sai said playing along with Reiko's new 'gate' theory.
"We're not trying to keep anything in. Just trying to keep people that are a threat out." Neji said obviously not getting that the two were just trying to have some fun.
"Oh really?" said Reiko looking at him with a mischievous look "Then why do you have hidden jutsus hmmm? Sure you're not trying to keep anything in? Or do you wish to try and sneak another lie by 'moi'?"
Before Neji could answer Reiko Gai's voice rang out to them, "My my, our youths are able to run with such haste! I see that Konoha is in great hands when we strong ninjas that have long since bloomed have passed!"
"Wha? What are you talking about?" Reiko said as she looked at the green beast of Konoha with confusion.
"OH DON'T WORRY YOUNG FLOWER YOU WILL BE VERY MUCH GROWN WHEN I DIE! HAHA! I AM A LONG WAY FROM DEATH!" Gai laughed as he looked at Reiko.
"Damn." Mumbled Reiko and Sai together.
At the Hokage's Office
By herself, Reiko was called into the office of Tsunade, where both the hokage and Ibiki the interrogator sat. In front of the two was a chair, where I'm going to take a wild guess that, that is where Reiko's supposed to sit.
(E/N: That's because your the author idiot.)
"Reiko please take a seat." Tsunade said to her.
Reiko went to the chair and perched her ass on it waiting for what ever the hell Tsunade called her for.
"It has come to my attention Reiko that you were recently kidnapped by two very dangerous members..." Tsunade began but was interrupted by Reiko.
(A/N: Now that I actually think about it, yes I know me think huge step for me, that could've been taken sooo pervertedly but it's to late for that now (sigh) Alls well.)
(E/N: And theres the proof of her stupidity. I usually edit her authors notes so that you all can at least understand what she is trying to say but this one confuses even me. So enjoy, )
"Isn't anybody that can do potential harm to someone else dangerous, or is it just these two that can do that?" Reiko asked her stubbornly.
"I suppose, anyway it has come to my attention that you have been kidnapped by two members of the Akatsuki…"
"I WAS KIDDNAPPED BY CATS! WHY HAVEN'T I BEEN INFORMED OF THIS!"
"What?"
"You said I was kidnapped by a cat suki… whatever suki was supposed to mean. But I thought there was supposed to be two of them so shouldn't it be catssuki… or better yet twopeoplewhoworkforthesquirrelsuki."
"…..No." Tsunade said looking at her. "You know what, since from what I can tell so far, Reiko's going to be a bit of a handful, so I'm going to go out on business and leave this up to you Ibiki!"
"WHAT!" Ibiki shouted glaring at the blonde hokage. "YOU'RE GOING TO GO OUT DRINKING AND GAMBLING AND LEAVE THIS TO ME!"
"Business." Tsunade corrected as she completely left the room.
Ibiki sighed as he turned to Reiko who was smiling menacingly at him from the chair, "So I guess it's just you and me?"
"(snort) Your stupid! Of course it's just you and me! Bill had to stay out with Sai-chan. Weren't you listening to Tsunade? She did only say for me to come in, geez your dumb."
Ibiki leaned on the desk with his hand as he looked at Reiko, "Alright, just tell me where Itachi and Kisame are."
"I don't know what your talking about."
"Yes you do."
"How do you know that I know what you think I know?" Reiko said as she looked at him crossing her arms looking at him coolly.
Reiko statement caused Ibiki to look at her in slight confusion before he answered her, hoping that he was correct or the young dobe would never let it down.
"I know because that's what the note said."
"Well the note lied."
"Give me the details."
"There are no details."
"Give me the details."
"Listen buddy there are no details." Reiko ground out at him through her teeth.
"Give me the details."
"Ibiki take the f out of details." Reiko said as she looked at him her eyes fierce.
"There is no f in details."
"Good I'm glad I got the point across." Reiko said as she turned her head to the side to watch the door open as someone walked in.
End of chapter 11
A/N: Sorry everyone, I know that the chapter 10 was late. To be honest it was done, but a part of the chapter was on my computer at home and I never really found the time to paste it in. But now I have. So as a apology to you I made chapter 11 very, very long. Sorry again, and I'll try to post chapter 12 after spring break.
DrAgOnLuVeR88: Sorry about not updating fast enough. To be honest we were done a looooooong time ago, but my laziness caught up on me; to me there is no such thing as writers block, I just call it choices. The other reason I didn't have that posted right away was because I wanted to get the eleventh chapter out. But as you can see Daigona has had a lot of editing to do… I'm so bad with grammar I am almost English retarded. But that is okay! For I Ghostio will get Daigona to correct all the errors I make in story writing for me… I think.
P.S: Thanks for reviewing.
Yes Reiko looks like Sasuke, she just has very feminine eyes, and she has white tips on her hair, and she has a feminine voice like Haku does, and maybe if she grew out her hair was would look really pretty; but she's Reiko, so chances are she won't… or will she. Then there's the fact that Kisame only looked at Reiko for a while, another thing you can tell from this chapter is that Itachi didn't think that Reiko was Sasuke from the very beginning. Anyway it is an insult to Reiko that she looks like Sasuke, but as you could see from the disclaimer she believes she has her advantages. Lol, yes if Reiko did call every man in Konoha gay they would probably all try and take revenge on her… I should write a side story on that. As to your whole squirrel persona a likely excuse… but it could happen. Any who Kisame's a guy, I never saw him or Itachi yet in the show before so they might be a little… or a lot out of character. I don't know, I barely watch the show because they always screw around with the script in dubbed version (ytv Naruto). But I have tried my absolute to try and keep everyone in a basic tone that they usually have. Oh don't worry Reiko really is stupid to an extent, she's very naïve and stuff and believe it or not is as graceful as a walrus on stiltz… but academically she's smart, sneaky, a tad bet clever/sly, and a bit strategically; but stupid never the less. Reiko I repeat it a complete and utter idiot… but I still love her cause she's based on me, so I guess I still love me. Oh yeah and keep up the Lucky Charms thieving! I'm supposedly a pixie because I took my cousin down on a trail in the wood skiing at the moment he's still pissed with me. But no big deal I had my kicks about watching him go down the hill on his snowboard. What this has to do with your review I have absolutely no idea!
P.S: For Kakashi to lose to Reiko is mainly because he tends to underestimate her and Sai. From the tree-climbing incident you can tell that Reiko has a thing to bend the rules. Something I like to do as well. Oh yeah and before I forget, yeah this is your longest review yet! But don't worry I like reviews there fun, fun, fun!
(A/N: Just so you guys know chapter... 13 is done it just has to be edited... so have a nice wait I guess. Oh yes and before I forget there some other reviews I just put it on the next chapter! Sorry I was finished this one a long time ago.)
(E/N: Actually... she was finished this on almost as soon as the other chapter was posted, I was just ... whats the word?... oh yes, lazy. Well, actually I was in the hospital, and I HATE HOSPITALS, and then I was out of town following that and then I had to catch up on homework so yeah. Anyways, if we get more reviews, we'll update FASTER! Well, Sayonara! )
