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Waking the next morning, Chuck had trouble moving. There was something lying on top of him. Twisting, it was definitely a person. I could love you. Blair? He was dehydrated, and it was difficult to open his eyes, but he was anxious to see if he was in Blair's bed.

He was.

Only… it wasn't Blair half-sprawled across him.

It was Serena.

Her other half, including her wild mane of blonde hair, was smothering Blair, who seemed to still be sleeping.

"Ugh, Serena." Prying himself mostly free, he rolled her off of Blair to lie between them.

Bleary-eyed, Serena grinned and reached up to pat his face, "Good morning, handsome."

He glowered at her, "What are you doing in this bed?"

Unfazed, Serena kept grinning, "What are you doing in this bed?" adding a waggle of her eyebrows.

"Everyone- including you, is dressed…" Only then did he remember his shirt was on Blair, who was in her bra and underwear, "Or at least decent. How did you end up here?"

Serena stretched, "When I got back from the rave, I peaked in on Blair- I wanted to make sure she wasn't freaking out. But she was safe, wasn't she? The sight of you two spooning, how cute was that? I felt lonely, so I joined you."

"It was the d-"

"Bass."

"And-"

"Shut up. She's fine, and don't you think you should be leaving? Or do you want her to wake up and wonder why you are in her bed- generally dressed, or not?"

His eyes drifted over to gaze upon Blair. She was turned towards them, clutching her pillow, happy in her sleeping state. Almost on cue, she nuzzled the pillow closer and murmured, "Chuck…"

His heart jolted and he looked at Serena to know if this was a normal thing for Blair.

Serena's face held nothing but shock, "Well, that's new. Maybe she's still coming down? Afterglow?"

With a last glance at Blair, Chuck slipped from the bed, picking up his shoes, and left the girl's suite for his own.

Back in his own suite, he found Nate still passed out. Dropping his shoes, he grabbed a bottle of water, drinking it all with a bunch of vitamins to help with the come-down. Only then did he fall into his own bed, sighing a little as he let memories from last night pull him back to sleep.

After first taking a shower and changing her clothes did Serena then disturb Blair, "Come on, you need water."

Blair smiled, blinking her eyes open, "Hi, S."

"Hi, B. Drink this, and take these vitamins."

Accepting them, Blair did as she was told, "Thank you, S. Where did Chuck go?"

Serena rather hoped Blair didn't know he had slept here, in case… anything, really. She was worried Blair would be anxious or paranoid after the drugs wore off. "He's in his suite."

"He was so beautiful last night," Blair sighed and snuggled against her pillow, "I wish he hadn't left."

"Blair… did… anything happen last night?" Given Blair's apparel, Serena had to ask.

"I jumped in the water. Chuck didn't want me to get cold."

Serena was relieved, "Well, why don't you take a shower and make sure you're not too sore or feeling sick? Then you can sleep more if you want?"

With a broad smile, Blair shot up, "I like that idea!"

Watching as Blair scrambled into the bathroom, Serena decided Blair definitely was having some afterglow. How much of one, she really was not ready for. Not fifteen minutes later, Blair dashed into the living area, dressed and dried off, and then went straight out the door. Serena, dropping her face into her hands, knew exactly where her best friend was going. She picked up her phone, "Nate! Incoming."

Nate opened the door before Blair even had a chance to knock. And without even seeing him, she continued straight for Chuck's bed. Her heart racing, she didn't care in the slightest about anything except this as she slipped into his bed and curled back up to him.


Chuck stretched a little as he awoke, laying on his side, nuzzling his pillow a bit at the happy memories still floating through his mind. It was the stretching that made him realize the weight around his waist and the feel of something pressing against his back. Reluctantly, he let go of the images he was envisioning and opened his eyes. It was difficult for him to process the fact that it was Blair's hand resting on his stomach and he had to gently roll over to see her for it to truly sink in. But this was his room- he had left her this morning. He was completely dumbfounded that she was here, only compounding his mental faculties more with the happiness of the fact.

Chuck Bass had never been a romantic, a daydreamer, or particularly bent on domesticity but this… he understood now, that sentiment, the dream and desire of waking up next to someone. Well, now that Serena was not present to add her own special flavor to things. He just laid there for a few minutes, watching her sleep, noticing how she curled up to the pillow, the simple yet pretty little dress she had changed into, and how peaceful she looked.

When he reached out to finally touch her, there was a moment where he saw a million possibilities, a million dreams and potential futures, of just him and her in bed together. Smiling, flirting, laughing, playing, dressed, undressed, sex, pleasure, and happiness. While, yes, they were young and Blair was in a way broken, Chuck knew they could have it all one day because he was in love… with his best friend.

That heartbeat passed and his hand was on her soft cheek, his mouth against her ear, "Blair," my love, "wake up."

Blair smiled, nuzzling her face against his hand before turning her head and pressing a kiss into it, "Never."

"Never?"

"I like it here." She scooted closer to him.

"But daylight has chased the shadows away… you can't hide anymore."

Shadows. Reality washed over Blair. The dreams she had been having could not have been… He smiled at her, "So, recovered from last night yet?"

Blair hid her face in the pillow, "I was hoping it was all a dream." He saw me in my underwear!

Chuck bent down and purred in her ear, "All of it?"

Wanting to run, she lifted her head, but he was so eager for her and therefore much faster. His mouth pressed to hers and Blair was flooded with the feelings of last night- the heat, the desire, how he felt wrapped around her. She pulled him close as she leaned back into the pillow, feeling it all again, feeling her heart race, her cheeks grow warm, and the pressure of his body, of his mouth, making her head swim.

When he stopped, he pulled back to look into her eyes, "All… of it?"

Blair couldn't look at him when she admitted the truth, instead watching her hand skim down his chest, "Alright. None… of it."

She furrowed her brow, only then looking up at him with a hard stare, "Though, what exactly did happen to me last night?"

Chuck laid back, happy to be innocent in this case, "You are going to want to ask them," he gestured towards the other room, "And let it be known that in a moment of the highest temptation, Chuck Bass was a gentleman."

Pursing her lips, she glared in the direction of their friends, before turning her gaze on him. "Highest temptation? And you, a gentleman?" She remembered how they had been, but the risk and danger of it all eluded her.

A devilish smirk crept across Chuck's face as he moved to lean down and whisper in her ear. His hand rested on her knee a moment, slipping up under her dress as he spoke, "I know my drugs, and even being high myself, I didn't do all I could have, Blair. You would have happily taken me as your lover last night and awoken naked in my arms, a blissfully satisfied woman. But no," he removed his hand from the place it was threatening to roam, "I was a gentleman."

Blair had been completely lost in his spell as he painted this image of what could have been. When he stopped speaking, the spell broke, and she was disgusted with herself for being so wrapped up in… all of it. "Ugh, the operative word being was!"

She hastily removed herself from his bed and he let her go, idly laying back and watching her. "Ah, now she's back- there's my Waldorf."

Pushing invisible wrinkles from her skirt, she huffed and looked back up at him, "I am not your… anything!"

"Not in the light of day, but in the deepest, darkest shadows…"

His voice was deep and it stirred that part of her she only let him reach. With a small smirk of her own, Blair leaned down and crawled up over his body before claiming his mouth. Chuck was stunned by her quick change from Queen B to his playful Blair.

When she pulled away, she murmured, "Your smoke and mirrors, your shrouds, and shadows, and deep, dark corners."

Never had he ever wanted so badly to burn out the sun, to keep her in the dark with him, always. She moved to leave him, but he couldn't let her, not just yet. His hand slipped up her neck and he leaned up, catching her mouth, eliciting a sweet little sigh from her. When he felt her capitulate, felt her kissing him back, did he let go. "One day, the sun will set and the light will have to share you with me."

Opening her eyes, Blair gazed down at him, his pose relaxed as his beautiful body stretched out beneath her. But it was his eyes that kept her held there, starting at him while his words echoed in her ears. So dark and deep, full of certainty that those words were a promise, an inevitability.

"That will be the day the mirrors crack and even your deepest, darkest corners will be filled with light." Blair said, putting their world back in order, though his words, that look in his eyes… the power of his desire, touched her. She pulled away, standing tall as she walked through his door, shaking out her long curls and slipping back into Queen B to face her friends.


By the time Chuck finally got up, showered, and dressed, he found a rather crushed Serena curled up in Nate's arms on their sofa. He nodded at his friend, who nodded back: 'we're good here'. Chuck left to seek out Blair and after a time, discovered her walking along the beach. "Blair."

She turned to look at him, "You do not want to talk to me right now."

"Yes, I do. I saw Serena…"

"I'm surprised she was able to get so emotional after all the drugs." Blair sneered before her anger roiled up, "How could she? She's my best friend! I had no control over myself!"

"You were safe, you're okay."

"My friends drugged me, there is nothing okay about that, Chuck. And you!"

Chuck cut in, "I had no idea they had slipped you any Ecstasy. And if I had, I would have never taken any myself- but it's fine, we're both fine."

"Nate let you get high when he knew I was high and then they left us alone! It's a miracle I'm still a virgin, I have no idea how you kept it in your pants." Blair practically spat the words at him.

Grabbing her arms, he stared at her hard, his voice strong, "Yes, you know."

"Please, you have a one track mind even without drugs." She tried to temper his intensity.

"No matter what I was feeling last night, you were high and I would never have risked that with you and you know why." Chuck was nearly gritting his teeth as he spoke, her stubbornness pushing his boundaries.

Blair tried to wiggle free from his grasp, his insistence that she knew something, his presence, all overwhelming her, "I do not!"

He would not let go, and he was determined to break her unwillingness to see, "Because of this."

In a flash, he was kissing her. Blair whimpered as her anger was quelled by his tender kiss, all of those beautiful feelings she had surrendered to last night stirring deep inside her. With a gasp, she broke away from his kiss and buried her face against his neck, "I can't be her, Chuck. I can't give you that."

He held her there in his arms, closing his eyes, just feeling her being here with him in this moment, "I asked that you not shut me out. Last night was… something else, but all I hope you see is that you can trust me, even when you take your dress off and jump into the sea."

Pulling back, she shoved him in the shoulder a little, "I hope you enjoyed that- you'll never be so lucky again."

Chuck looked dejected, "Really? Because I was thinking I might go shopping and hoped you would try on some lingerie for me…"

"Ugh, Bass!" She groaned, but he just smiled at her, "Though, I suppose I should leave Serena to feel guilty awhile longer… but no lingerie!"

"Bikinis?"

"Chuck!"

"No… not loud enough, we're really going to have to work on that."

Blair groaned, turning, and started back towards the more civilized parts of the island.


Chuck kept an eye on Blair for the remainder of break, worried at any lingering effects from the drugs. She would not eat much the first day, but after that seemed fine. However, the day they were to fly back to New York, depression kicked in. It was all Serena could do to get her out of bed and dressed. During take off, she was crying into the blonde's hair as her insecurities ruled her.

Once they were in the air, Chuck took over, taking Blair to a private bedroom at the back of the plane. He tucked her in and closed all the blinds before crawling in next to her. She snuggled up to him and he pulled her close, murmuring to her, "You know this is all chemistry right? Your serotonin levels have depleted and…"

"Because my friends drugged me!"

"Blair, they just wanted you to relax and have fun. And you did, didn't you?"

She sniffled and had to stop and think about that night. It had been wild… and she had felt free. She had not worried about being with Chuck, they had been so close, and he took care of her. She nuzzled against him a little, "That's not the point… it wasn't my choice."

"Either way," he ran his hand over her hair, "For just one night, the Queen cast her crown aside and played amongst the commoners. It's was beautiful… I think I shall never forget it." The night I realized I was in love with you.

Blair scoffed, "You just enjoyed rubbing up against me and seeing me in my underwear. Boys always want what they can't have."

"Oh, is that it? It's all about sex?"

"Of course. As if there could be some other reason?" She tried to turn away from him, wishing now for some space to wallow in.

But Chuck was not about to leave her alone with such ideas. Holding her chin, he tried to turn her face to him, "Blair, look at me."

Petulant, she closed her eyes, "No."

He sighed, "Fine, but you will hear me. You know very well that I am a man, Blair, and those desires and appetites are strong in me. But the want I have for you- that I want you in my life, goes beyond feeling you pressed against me. I want that little girl who took my scarf, the girl who gave me my favorite bow tie, the one that plays Bach on her cello for me, the beautiful lady that debuted at the Viennese Opera Ball on my arm, who will scold me in one breath and in the next take my breath away with her kisses."

Blair fluttered her eyes open as he spoke, a pout forming on her lips as his words grew progressively sweeter, "Chuck."

"I know," he sighed again, "I shouldn't say such things. But you are hurting and feel in pieces. I'm here, caring, just the same as you would do for me. Now, lay here, and sleep. Let your body recover, I'm here if you need me- to keep you warm, or shut out your dark thoughts."

Her eyes were still sad but she consented, curling back up against him, letting the soothing motion of his hand passing through her curls lull her to sleep. She had trouble sleeping, but every time she awoke, Chuck was there. When they landed, Blair was quiet as he passed her into Serena's care. The blonde was determined to pay penitence for what she did, caring for her best friend's every whim the rest of the weekend.


Blair recovered from her dip into depression in time to be Queen B on Monday. Life returned to its normal stream of events, school and Queenship, outings with Serena, sneaking off for the occasional drink with Chuck. All of spring break seemed like a hazy dream once they returned to the city. It surfaced in her dreams some nights, other times, she would see Chuck looking at her and she knew he was recalling that place and time. But in the light of day, it was all simply too strange to feel it ever could have been real.

The few times he captured her in the weeks that followed were soft and gentle, a fleeting kiss to simply say 'I was thinking of you'. It was always just enough to unsettle her balanced world and made a small part of her long for that full moon over Ibiza. It was also enough to frustrate her and make her wish to slip into the shadows.


It was a late night at Victrola. Chuck sat in his booth watching over the crowds of people, the show on stage, couples making out in other booths before pulling velvet curtains closed to enjoy each other privately. Blair sat next to him, having joined him for a few rounds of drinks. She was quiet tonight, absorbed in watching others as much as he was.

There was a couple putting on an exceptional show in one of the booths and both Chuck and Blair were watching them intently. The girl was in the man's lap, the straps of her dress falling down her arms as he held her tight to his body, their mouths fused, kissing with such passion and desperation.

"I don't get it." Blair admitted to him.

"You don't get what, exactly?" Chuck asked.

"That." She continued to watch the couple before they finally, fumbling, pulled the curtain closed around their table.

But Chuck was now staring at Blair, studying her, pondering what she had confessed. "Pull the curtain shut, Blair."

Her eyes went wide, "Excuse me?"

"Close it."

"But people will-"

"People come here to escape into their own fantasies. No one is watching us and no one will recall it is you sitting with me if they should even notice. Now close it."

Blair looked at him hard for a moment before deciding she wanted to escape for a time, to just be… in the shadows. She moved to grasp the curtains and pulled them firmly shut, the din and colors disappearing, leaving them in the softly lit booth, just the two of them. Turning back to Chuck, she wondered what would come next.

Pushing his drink to the far side of the table, Chuck patted the table top in front of him, "Sit."

"But…"

"Waldorf, sit."

With a small huff of resignation, Blair climbed up and sat atop the table directly in front of Chuck.

He took a moment to study her, planning his next move. She wore a little plaid grey Burberry skirt, stopping short of the knees she had primly pressed together before him, with an innocent white blouse, and a preppy blazer.

"First, this goes." Reaching up, he pulled the jacket off, "Now, you were saying?"

Blair blushed a little from his attention, his warm gaze, his hands running down her arms as he pushed the jacket away- no, it wasn't him, it was those drinks she had. And innocence aside, she was Queen B. So she held strong, "I just don't get what the big deal is."

Chuck sat back, watching her haughty air as she held on to her composure in spite of what he saw as being very obvious, "But you're curious."

She scoffed, "You wish."

"No, you wish." He easily countered.

With a roll of her eyes, Blair replied with disbelief, "You forget who you're talking to."

Leaning forward, Chuck swiftly reached up and tore her blouse open, sending the shiny little white buttons scattering into the darkness. "So do you."

She gasped and before she could pull her ruined shirt around her, Chuck was kissing her; his mouth hot and urgent, leaving her breathless, her mind hazy with delight. Or hazy… from the alcohol? He pulled away and Blair slowly opened her eyes to gaze at him. He sat back again, a wicked half smile on his face.

"What you don't understand," he purred, "is the feeling of it."

Pausing, he leaned back in, his face close to hers, "You only imagine a thick hard cock plowing into a tight little cunt, in and out, again and again. Oh, but it's so much more than that."

With once again shocking speed, Chuck pulled the fabric of her lacy little bra down, exposing her breasts, causing them to be pushed up in offering. "Just think about touching. Touching a person's hand or face is rare enough, but your sex is wrapped up and hidden away day in and day out."

Embarrassment tinged Blair's cheeks pink, but her breathing was heavy as she watched him as he gazed at her breasts. His words burned in her ears and he was right. Touch me, her mind screamed.

"Your breasts, buried under jacket and blouse, denied almost all sensation; the soft, delicate orbs of flesh constantly trussed up in a bra, numb and isolated." Carefully, slowly, he licked his lips, before he began to lift his hands, "Denied the heat of skin touching skin."

Blair's eyes fluttered shut just as his hands cupped her breasts. His grasp was firm as his hands massaged her, his touch, the feel of him on her caused her nipples to tighten.

He continued speaking though his mouth had grown hot and dry while his eyes grew dark, his desire twisting with a memory, "But this… this isn't entirely new, is it?"

At this reminder, she bit her lip, turning her head before opening her eyes. Blair gazed at the tumbler that had once held his drink, all that remained was a tiny mountain of ice shards. The idea of their coolness was soothing. With that thought she watched as Chuck reached down to retrieve one.

He lifted it to her neck, making her release a soft little gasp as the ice melted on her warm skin. He let the liquid slide, pulling his hand down her chest with it. Little bumps rose from her skin as the ice moved lower and lower, before he finally pressed the remaining sliver of ice against her nipple.

The smallest cry broke from her lips at the freezing sensation before a heady wave of heat engulfed her senses. She did not need to look to know what had happened, her fingers had already made their way into his hair and a deep moan of pleasure fell from her lips. His mouth was wondrous, the heat and sensation of it. Lost to him, her knees finally fell open as his mouth and tongue and hands pulled her deeper into this haze of feelings. She mewled when there was a pause, his mouth moving from one side to the other.

When Chuck had slightly sated this desire for her, he leaned back once more to study the prim beauty, the absolute perfection, that he was slowly violating. Her sexuality was unraveling before him as she sat there, her knees splayed open, her chest exposed, heaving, with lust burning in her eyes.

Satisfied, he went further. "And here that was only heat. Yet there is so much you can feel- when they are squeezed," her breasts filled his hands and he squeezed them roughly, watching as her mouth fell open with a small gasp.

"And pinched," rolling her nipples between his fingers now, he once again mimicked his words, this time eliciting a tiny cry of surprise before she pouted, bouncing a little against the table in frustration, wanting more of his attention. Chuck grinned at this, watching her breasts bounce. The temptation was too much- he wanted more. Pushing her ruined shirt away, he swiftly unsnapped her bra before also discarding it. Now completely revealed to him, he took them in his hands, pushing them up before letting go, watching the fullness of them bounce.

"Mm, and how could I forget how they taunt a man during sex. When I'm on top, the way they move so gently. Yet oh, if you were on top, they would bounce and drive me mad until I grab them," Chuck mirrored this action, aggressively, "and have my way with them, pinching, sucking, licking, biting, as you would bounce in my lap."

The idea of it all was indeed beginning to drive him mad as he buried his face there, tasting more of her. He pushed further as his mouth explored her in the way that he described, nipping at her, sucking hard. He made her cry with desperation as he worked out his desire, certain to bruise her, happy to leave her reminders of something he knew he would never forget.

Blair had never felt so alive. Yes, her mind was perfectly hazy, but her entire being was focused on one thing: Chuck. His mouth was fantastic, everything… everything he did only drove her to want more, to want it to never stop. That is why instead of being startled, her body hummed with excitement when his hand found its way under her skirt. Two of his fingers pressed against her underwear and Blair moaned deeply at the slight contact. Grasping his hair, she dragged his mouth to hers as he roughly stroked her, back and forth, through her soaked panties.

Then… with precise cruelty,

Chuck pulled entirely away from her. Mouth, hands, his entire body. Her eyes remained shut in agony, her whole being wanting him, and in her shock she cried out, "Chuck!"

He held her chin, leaning in for the briefest moment to kiss her lips, "That… sounds much better."

Perfect fury. Blair's eyes snapped open as she pouted- slightly horrified, yet angry, her small fist pounding against his shoulders, "How could you‽"

"Because, until now Waldorf, you couldn't imagine what was so alluring about sex." Leaning in again, this time he pressed his wide tongue against one nipple, licking hard.

Her mouth fell open a little once more, the haze of desire instantly coming over her, even at this tiny amount of attention. When the sensation stopped and her head cleared, Chuck was holding up her preppy little blazer.

"Put this back on."

She glared at him.

"Trust me."

Frustrated, hoping somehow for more, Blair did as he suggested, buttoning it up, the jacket coming to barely cover the tops of her breasts. Chuck picked up her bra and blouse, folding them together in a small bundle. Her cheeks burned deep pink as she quickly snatched the items from him and shoved them in her handbag. His hand now suddenly empty, he took her free hand and lead her from the club, into his limo.

He held the car door open for her and she slipped inside first. By the time he closed the door, Blair was in his lap, kissing him wildly as she pulled the jacket open. Chuck was breathless, delighted by her eager response to continue.

"Mm, stop," he purred, pulling back as he held her in place, "I want to see you."

She pouted at him as he gazed at her a few moments. The grey plaid skirt draped over his legs, the wonderfully preppy blazer, open to expose naked skin, the beautiful curve of her breasts underneath, the sight of her tousled curls falling over her shoulders, her lips swollen from his kisses, and the bright excitement of desire in her eyes. In his adoration, she grew impatient, bouncing a little to get his attention. This time, she was not sitting on the table however, but straddling him, sitting his lap, and his playboy smirk crossed his face.

With haste, he shoved the blazer off and sliding his hands under her skirt, up, and back, to grab her ass, he dared her, "Do that again."

She grinned and bounced up and down for him. He groaned, her perfect orbs bouncing, a delicious and tempting sight as she moved against his lap, bumping against his hard cock so innocently. Chuck lasted just long enough to record the sight of her, half naked, bouncing in his lap before his hands ground her ass against him and he leaned forward to catch one of the teasing nipples in his mouth.

Blair panted with delight, her fingers curling in his hair, encouraging his attentions as she rolled her hips against his, heat and wetness flooding between her thighs. All she could think was how good it all felt, how good Chuck felt. She begged, "More."

He moaned, "God… Waldorf."

Turning, he pushed her back onto the seat, laying her out before him. Hungrily, his mouth found hers, kissing deeply, with so much passion, as he pinned her there. His hips were still pressed against hers and with one hand in her hair, the other grasping her thigh, he began to grind against her. Desire ran hot in his blood, tasting her, feeling her- fuck, she was probably soaking into his trousers right now. She teased him with her tongue as they kissed, playing coy, causing him to thrust harder against her in revenge. It was heaven, causing this friction with her, and hell, all he would have to do is pull open his trousers and… Chuck let out a fierce groan in his agony.

Arthur knocked firmly on the partition, "Mr. Bass."

Shit… thank God for Arthur. Chuck had told him to never take… detours, when he was alone with Blair. They hadn't even felt the limo come to a stop. Gritting his teeth, Chuck coolly pulled himself off Blair, sliding a hand through his hair before picking up her blazer for her. He watched her flushed cheeks darken as she sat up and took the garment, slipping it over her shoulders. Then he kissed her, pulling the blazer closed around her, deftly buttoning it as his mouth pressed, insistently, to hers.

When he stopped, he leaned his forehead against her, "You need to go."

"But, I don't-"

"Go. This was too much. Let someone else pay for your time in the shadows."

With that, Chuck pushed the limo door open.

Blair felt a mix of embarrassment and shame as she picked up her shirt and bra, scooting past him to the door. She had never meant for… and now… Now she was going to need a cold shower and hoped she would be able to sleep, a sinking feeling that her newfound knowledge would haunt her.

Chuck fought to keep back a moan as she crawled passed him, God, she even smelled like sex now.

Before she pushed the door closed, she murmured, "Goodnight, Chuck."

Imagining how she would have to… lull herself to sleep, Chuck's smirk found a way back to his face, "Sweet dreams, Waldorf."

Alone in the darkness once more, he dropped his head in his hands and let out a deep growl of frustration. When he picked up his phone, his request was specific: brunette with a plaid skirt and a blazer. It was the only way he was going to get any rest tonight.


Chuck's risk had sparked defiance in the Queen. She was all bright light and sass, the way she passed him in the halls, the flip of her hair over her shoulder, looking at him with distain. He knew very well she was trying to squash the fire he had finally set alight in her. She would fight it, fight him, but for now he would let her pretend she was winning.

Soon the school year was winding down and the last of the big parties before dispersing across the globe for the summer was upon them. Serena had cajoled Nate into taking her, Blair had the next man in her cycle lined up- Keith Nelson's turn, and Chuck… was actually going. He was taking some pretty little Swedish exchange student named Emma.

The event was fairly tame; Keith was delightfully annoying, a bit like Chuck's gaze on her for a good portion of the night. Just for fun, she brushed passed him at one point, grazing against him more than necessary, "Excuse me, Bass."

She heard him chuckle quietly. Which in the end made her even more annoyed- with him, and with herself. For once she was looking forward to the after party, she needed a drink to take the edge off. At least her little tease had caused Chuck to vanish for a little while?

When they all finally climbed into Chuck's limo to head to Victrola, Blair noticed he sat back, grinning like the Bass that ate the canary, while Emma seemed quite pleased. Blair did not want to let her imagination fill in those blanks. Maybe she would need more than one drink?

Upon arriving, the three girls went straight to the ladies room to freshen up. Primping in the mirrors, the girls chatted. And unfortunately for Blair, Emma's English was flawless.

"How has your night been, Emma?" Serena sweetly asked.

Emma was radiant as she beamed, replying, "Wonderful. I never imagined I would get to have the full Chuck Bass experience tonight- not when going to such a stuffy event."

"Full experience?" Serena couldn't help but ask for clarification. When had that happened during the party?

Emma just continued to beam, "Yes. Near the end, he pulled me into a dark hallway and… he is as amazing as all the girls have said! His voice, his hands, his…" she paused and turned pink, "And I've never orgasmed like that."

Blair kept her face cool, though her teeth were clenched behind her false smile. She had just touched up her eyes and was twisting the eye liner pencil to sooth her. Twisting it between her hands, harder than the motion appeared. By the end of Emma's reverie, there was a loud snap, the pencil having cracked in two.

Serena looked concerned, Emma was unfazed, and Blair laughed it off, "Guess it's just been through too much?"

The pencil- or her?

Returning to the boys, the girls enjoyed their drinks- Blair faster than the others, and got to the real partying. While Blair deigned to dance in the club with Keith, her eyes flickered over to Chuck, her gaze burning and dark. He met her look with questioning eyes, not knowing that she knew about his dalliance. Infuriated by Chuck's apparent confusion, she shoved Keith's hands away and went to the bar for another drink. Her shadow was not far behind.

Blair downed her second drink, ordering a third by the time Chuck was at her side, "Blair. What are you doing?"

She went to pick up her next martini, but he snatched her hand and pulled her close so she could not fight him. He could see immediately the anger deep in her eyes. "What, one girl wasn't enough for you tonight?"

That shocked Chuck, "What?"

"Your date has a big mouth. How could you? We were at the same party, what if I had…"

"You were toying with me! Flitting around with vapid Keith Nelson of all people while you watched me, and then when you rubbed up against me like a cat in heat, what was I supposed to do? We're not anything, remember?" Chuck's frustrated desire rose quickly, his words biting hard.

"Exactly. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to get back to my drink." Blair tore herself from him and grabbed her drink, downing it under his hot gaze. They were both perfectly angry now and Chuck turned, unable to cope with a jealous, infuriated Blair.

In the next few hours, Blair got herself properly drunk- the first time in a long time. Soon, it was time to head home, everyone tired from a night of polite society and youthful excess. Chuck's anger had cooled to upset while he watched Blair knock back drink after drink. Keith and Emma were returned to the perfect families, the remaining foursome ended up in the grande Bass suite at the Palace. In his heart, Chuck couldn't leave her alone in such a drunken state and both Nate and Serena were fairly plastered as well.

Through her stupor, Blair realized she had never been in his suite before. It was quite lovely, even more so she imagined, when one was not drunk. Her stomach had begun to fight her however, and with Serena's help, she somehow made it to the nearest bathroom in time to pay the first fee for drinking too much. Even with her best friend's assistance, her dress was ruined in the process of expelling so much alcohol.

Chuck helped Nate to a bed before he heard Blair. He busied himself a little, but the sound brought back painful memories. When Blair was making herself sick and he found her… and that first cotillion. When the sound finally subsided, he knocked and passed Serena a pair of silken pajamas for Blair, "Nate's sleeping in the other bedroom, I'll be on the sofa should anything happen."

Serena gave him a little smile, accepting the clothes. Shutting the door, she helped Blair out of the now ruined gown and into Chuck's pajamas before tucking her into the bed in the attached room. The blonde then tiptoed passed a dozing Chuck on the sofa before curling up with Nate. Somehow, sleeping with Nate always made her hangovers in the morning better.


Blair awoke early. It was the splitting headache… oh, she had certainly had plenty of drinks last night. Pulling the sheets aside, she was confused by her apparel. Too big for her, though nice- clearly a guys. And why was she not in her own room? Getting to her feet, she staggered towards the dresser to gaze in the mirror above it. Pulling her hands back over her hair, she looked awful. Well, she looked as awful as she felt, anyway.

With a sigh, she dropped her hands to the edge of the dresser. Light. Startled, Blair gazed down to see her touch had caused a light to turn on inside the dresser; it contained a glass case in the top. Her eyes bleary, Blair leaned down to inspect its contents.

Photos… Bart, many years ago, with a beautiful pregnant woman- Chuck's mother. Her eyes grew wide as she realized this was Chuck's room? Suddenly she was even more eager to see what else the case contained. Bart and his wife as a young couple. The Times article with Bart and Chuck from fifth grade. That made her smile… but the smile quickly faded when next to it was her first appearance in the Times. And then more photos of her… one of her and Serena from the ice rink- though Serena was covered. Her and Chuck at Cotillion the past two years- from Serena's spy photos. Her and Chuck from the opera ball. And from before that- this winter… her and Chuck in London. She stared at that one for several moments, studying their faces. It made her heart pound furiously in her chest to see the expressions they both had and to remember that feeling. The laughter, the sweetness, his care, and thoughtfulness.

Tearing her eyes away from the photo, she looked at what else was tucked inside. Some other photos of him and Nate, nights they probably got into trouble together, some ticket stubs, and then… Blair thought she was going to be ill again. First, her eyes fell to a glittering diamond- a ring, shimmering proudly on a velvet display stand. Flickering back to a photo of Bart and his wife, it was the same ring she wore on her left hand. Gazing back at the ring, she thought it was sweet that Chuck was so sentimental- who would have suspected? But that's when her stomach dropped, because there was something else on that little velvet stand.

Below it, tied in a perfect little bow, was Blair's ribbon.

Her chest felt tight, her breath was short. Her ribbon, next to his mother's ring. She felt her head begin to swim. She was in his room, while wearing his pajamas. She began to panic, clawing at the buttons of the shirt to open it. Out. She had to get out. Stumbling towards her dress, she saw how ruined it was. She threw his closet doors open, her breathing still short as she saw the line of his uniforms, his suits, dress clothes, bow ties… she knew it all so well, and it all terrified her more. Coats, there were his coats? She pulled a classic trench from its hanger after she removed his silk pajamas and hastily threw it on. Buttons, tie the belt, where was her clutch… there, and… her pumps… she slipped them on, and bolted from the suite, everyone else still peacefully slumbering.


AN: Thanks to Anjum and Mary for proofing! Also, thanks to Emma (Tranquility on FanForum) for the chapter title. Swedish for 'Say Goodbye to my Heart'. And Happy Limoversary! Six years ago today our ship was born! How lucky I feel to have my birth month shared with the best ship in history ^_^

Now for the brief disclaimer I forgot on the last chapter! Don't drug you friends, and don't do drugs. This is fiction, I did tons of research before writing that situation. So please be smart, about the friends you keep, and the situations you put yourself into. :steps off soapbox:

And now my heaps of love and thanks for the huge outpouring of reviews on the last chapter. Wow, I can't tell you all how floored I am! I tried to analyze it, but nothing could satisfy my analytical brain. However my heart lept and rejoiced at every review, long and short, that you wrote. Words are going to completely fail me here, and I just wish I could hug each and every one of you!

Back to the chapter- well? How was the morning after? And... ahem... Victrola and the limo? For those of you who have been reading my stories since the early days, I'm keen to hear your views on how (if?) my smut writing has evolved!
And then... ;_; Blair closing scene. I've re-read it several times since I wrote it and it really effects me.
Thank you again, so much! Until next time, find me on social media -_^ xoxo ~K